[PFS/Shifty] We b4 Goblins! (Reta's Rippers) (Inactive)

Game Master Nik B.

Poog swings his club once more. "Follow your friend stupid creature!"

Attack: 1d20 - 1 ⇒ (13) - 1 = 12
Damage: 1d4 - 2 ⇒ (2) - 2 = 0

Mogmurch ties again

attack: 1d20 - 1 ⇒ (9) - 1 = 8

damage: 1d4 - 2 ⇒ (4) - 2 = 2

The slippery cat is slippery.. Poog and Mog miss it.

It MUST be a Darkfear Spirit!

Reta spits in both hands, and grabs the club again.

Attack: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (9) + 2 = 11

"Argh!"

Grabby cat is like greased lighting! Reta misses!

Attack1d20 + 5 ⇒ (20) + 5 = 25Damage1d3 - 1 ⇒ (3) - 1 = 2
Crit1d20 + 5 ⇒ (5) + 5 = 10Damage1d3 - 1 ⇒ (2) - 1 = 1
Chuffy fights on bravely against little kitties.

The creature flees - not happy with having its chops busted by Chuffy.

Chuffy and Mog are entitled to AOO's

***

With the evil guardians removed, you are free to finish presenting the toads....

and anything else you wish to do

Die cat!

attack: 1d20 - 1 ⇒ (8) - 1 = 7

damage: 1d4 - 2 ⇒ (4) - 2 = 2

- - - -

After swinging at the cat, Mogmurch again presents his toad. He kneels down.

Me have best today please accept him as offering..OH great spirit"

The cave remains silent.

Nothing tries to kill you.

Must be a positive sign.

Moving on shortly, final actions, heals etc? :)

"Somebody hurt? Want healing of Zarongel?"

Me hurt a little

Me want to present mighty Toad!

Reta re-presents her toad and shouts "Spotol! Good toad! Me good enough for Licktoads now?"

The toads are presented to the cave, and no Goblins are whacked into paste.

With their bold quest complete, the now full-fledged goblins are free to make their way back to Licktoad Village.

***
A colorfully painted wagon sits half-sunken in a patch of foul-smelling mud. Abominable words decorate the side of the wagon along with paintings of potions and magic trinkets. Bottles, barrels, pots, and all manner of real potions and curios poke out from beneath the bulging canvas that covers the top of the wagon.

A strange lady with an awesome hat is currently yelling at a donkey. She stops for a moment and waves at you like you are all old pals, and continues hassling the big dumb animal.

Pic in slides

Reta strides right up. "Who is you, lady?"

She starts gesticulating and smiling broadly and talking... it sounds like blah blah blah, but Mogmurch makes it out as longlegs, which is good, as he speaks longlegs!

Turns out she is selling more of these wonderful yuk-yuk potions for geeeepeeee's. You don't have any GPs though...

Yummy yucky potions is good. I say we kill her then slaughter donkey for fun then drink yuck yuck!

"OK. I is thirsty too. And longlegs looks tasty."

"You give us potions and you leave!"

Before leaving the cave Poog casts a spell on Mogmurch.
CLW: 1d8 + 1 ⇒ (8) + 1 = 9

"You give us potions and you leave!"

She seems to think Mogs suggestion is somehow a sales enquiry and smiles a lot!

"A bargain eyed customer! Magical Maggies Miracle Medicine mends all your maladies! Just fifty gold pieces!" She exclaims then pauses a moment,"Just THIRTHY golds to such a discerning buyer - I have a couple, how many you want to buy!?" she smiles warmly.

"No human...we take potions! Give us NOW!"

"Gives me 3 medicines. That means you also gives me, umm, 3 times 30 is ... you give me 500 golds!"

Poog can you make longlegs talk? Tell her we burn her cart and kill her donkey for fun. Then we kill her for more fun!

With that chuffy grins wikedly and approaches the Donkey with a knife.

The woman picks up the demand and her smile fades "Well then, if it's some potions you want, you toe sucking little freak..." and she starts pulling out another vial.

R1
Poog
Reta
MAGGIE

Kill her ! Kill her! Chuffy shouts.

Reta swipes at her with her weapon.

Attack: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (13) + 2 = 15
Damage: 1d6 ⇒ 3

Reta tags her with a cheeky chop!

MM 3

Snapping out of a daydream Poog only heard burn her cart and that's what he does. After burning the woman and the donkey.

"I will do her weak. Then we burn cart and do donkey BBQ."

Touching the woman to make her tired: touch of fatigue 1R; DC11 Will to resist

1d20 ⇒ 6
The woman looks looks terribly tired, and she moves from being mobbed...

She then throws something at Poog!
(Poog may take an AoO)

Attack - bomb 1d20 + 1 ⇒ (15) + 1 = 16
Damage 1d6 + 1 ⇒ (2) + 1 = 3

R1
Mog
Chuffy

R2
Poog
Reta
MAGGIE

Pook does not have a weapon out, does he still provoke?

And if Poog did not gain any HP since goblin with helmet attack, he's at 0 HP.

Chuffy jumps Maggie with a roar

Zargonel be wit us!

Attack1d20 + 3 ⇒ (14) + 3 = 17 Damaeg 1d3 - 1 ⇒ (1) - 1 = 0

"Bombs! I hates bombz. Well, when thrown at me, anyways..."

Reta takes a big swing at the longshanks.

Attack: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (9) + 2 = 11
Damage: 1d6 ⇒ 6

Mogmurch ties to hit the woman wit his club.

attack: 1d20 - 1 ⇒ (15) - 1 = 14

damage: 1d4 - 2 ⇒ (2) - 2 = 0

Poog could only AOO with bad language

Unluckily for the lady, she gets whumped and hits the mud seconds after all three Goblins hit her.

"My head hurts, skin burns. Does she have something to drink? Ale maybe?"

First we stick knives into the Donkey! Chuffy exclaims with a squeel. he makes sure tha the horse is tied up nice and tight and then gives it a hefty stab.

Here! Drink this!

Chuffy makes sure the donkey is well and truly 'stuck in the mud', then adds a new definition to the word 'stuck' as the wicked little Goblin gets to work.

Maggie’s wagon is filled with all sorts of things, including colourful scraps of cloth, empty bottles, a barrel of seawater, a small keg of grain alcohol, labels, two pots of glue, a well-used makeup kit, a small mirror, a stuffed raven, a makeshift alchemy lab, 7 torches, a potion (of who knows!?), and five more bottles of “Magical Maggie’s Miracle Medicine”

There is also the horribly offensive bright and sparkly word covered paper and a map.
The sheer gravitas of such a find...the Chief needs to know about THIS!

Reta starts shoving pockets full of makeup, mirror and stuff, and grabs some medicines too.

"Grabz all of itz, and take home to Licktoads!"

Awww.... no burn wagon?

take wagon to chief!

Wagon too big and heavy for a bunch of Goblins to pull, even without the dead donkey attached to it. That said, all of the interesting things get stolen.

***

The group triumphantly returns to the dank grandeur of Licktoad Village.

Older goblins crowd around to inspect your new toads, and gawk at trinkets uncovered during the big adventure, and shout half-formed questions.

Whelp-wrangler Loptop eventually shoves her way to the front of the mob.

“Pssht! You?! Didn’t think you would be first back from the bog. Didn’t think you’d be back at all! Brinestump be dangerous today! Slorb saw a stranger on the road this morning, a pointy elfy one with a sparkly hat and a bright wagon and a funny horse. Get you stabby stuff—we’re off to find her and give her a good Licktoad welcome!”

Reta is holding the offensive sparkly paper and map in her pocket...
Reveal away!

"Ha! We gives her a Licktoad welcome already! Dead is the Longshanks! Dead is the horsey! And we takes what we want from the big wagon!"

Reta pills out the sparkly paper and shows it off.

"Behold! Paper that sparkles!"

Reta spits the bold claim, and the other Goblins are mystified and amazed at the pack of angry little goblins that left as whelps but have returned as vicious Licktoads.

Loptop looks a little disappointed about missing the violence, but several goblins run off into the swamp to start pulling the colorful wagon apart. Loptop’s disappointment slowly turns to approval though "Who the stranger? What else was found?" Loptop looks at the words "I'll take the writing to show Slorb and Chief Gutwad!"

"If you got nothing else, you go rest, you Licktoads now!"

***

You have had time to sleep off the morning’s excitement, trade newfound treasures for additional weapons or fire, and visit Nasty Grammel for some healing (free now that you're grown up!).

After a few hours, word spreads of a meeting in Chief Gutwad’s moot house, and the entire village gathers in the sagging, smoke-filled hut.

The moot house is stacked high with jars of strange, fuzzy creatures preserved in pickle brine, and the skinned hides of anything else too large for even the mightiest jar.

The chief holds up a single hand—a human’s, by the look of it—from atop his tall chair, silencing the goblin horde. All the goblins know that His Mighty Girthness Chief Rendwattle Gutwad is a goblin of such remarkableness that the mere sound of his voice has driven goblins to madness or made heads explode. Therefore, his faithful advisor

Slorb speaks on the chief ’s behalf.

“Our new goblin heroes have returned with horrible, horrible news: A stranger has brought horrible, horrible words into our swamp. Extra-horrible words! Because these words sparkle. Maybe they be magic words. Maybe even worse magic than regular words. The stranger also had a map, and Chief Gutwad knows from looking at the map that this is clearly where the longshanks MAKE their terrible sparkly words! They be planning something bad. But we be goblins! We be the baddest thing! Licktoads will march on longshanks word-makers and smash everything!"

“Light the fire! Sharpen blade!
We be goblins! We make raid!”

"We be goblins! We be Licktoads!
We go marching and take the roads!
Kill the longshanks, kill them dead!
We be Licktoads, paint them red!

Licktoads strong!
Licktoads fight!
Ugly Longshanks
Say goodnight!

The small Goblin warband moves through the forest chittering and giggling about the trouble they know they are set to inflict.

The light forest and overgrown field give way to a rundown little farm bustling with activity. Colorful paper and cloth hang from the barn and house, and tables loaded with food and drink are scattered around the yard. In the center of it all stands a cake that rises nearly two goblins tall and drips with icing and custard. A few slices have already been removed, revealing an interior that looks moist and delicious.

This is a bit of a sandbox type raid, there are a few main key points of interest that you can basically roll in and create carnage with, and there is no expectation that you will wreck every area on offer (indeed there's a lot of enemies!) - its more come up with a general scheme of mayhem and then go cause a calamity.

Key points of note:
The yard/celebration.
The barn.
The animal pens
The farmhouse.
-Pick a couple of places, and give an overview of your plan, and let's see just how much chaos you can cause :)

Reta wants cake! And a pretty dress.

Mogmurch want to kill dogs!

So Reta wants to check the yard, Mog is looking at the pens?