| Monkeygod |
It is much, much better. There's still some places that need editing, like the line about "a series of 3 candles and an opera" or something.
Also, the Navajo section still needs to be better explained. Why does Lenore suggest them of all peoples? and magi? as in Mages? or as in mystics? if mystics, it would make more sense to refer to them as shaman, or spirit guides, etc. If Mages, I am not positive if many Mages came from Native Americans, let alone the Navajo. Also, you don't mention anything regarding where they picked up that language, just that they knew pieces of it.
When this is fully finished, I think it could use several read overs to make sure it's grammatically correct.
Edgar Collins
|
I think it makes more sense now....I fixed the candle thing...
also explained how as an intelligence officer worked in developing the code talker program based on the (Navajo language) at camp pendelton in 1942......
I will certainly keep working on it.....
Started as an outline.....Now it reads much better
| Monkeygod |
Ok we need to expand and explore Edgar's vampiric life more. He's been undead for well over 50 years and yet there's hardly anything there. You need to remedy that before I can approve him, as that's the most important part of his bio. I do agree that ten years is a good amount of time for him to be in torpor, but that still leaves you a ton of time to account for.
Dennis and Animaezing, can you both to me a pair of favors?? One, lend a hand to making edgar's history so we can get him up and going??
Two would both of you mind giving your character's thoughts and opinions on the various vampire clans?? Cover the 13 main, including your own, for sure. Beyond that, you can feel free to comment on any of the random bloodlines if you so desire, provided your character would IG knowledge of them.
| Dennis Harry |
Edgar's History - The Vampiric history could use some tightening up (if it is more detail you want Monkeygod) by explaining:
1) The journey back to the US - was in on a plane a ship?
2) The time on the reservation, how did dgar blend in and live with the Navajo? Even if there are no Dreamspeakers among them were there Garou? Were there Hedge Mages? How did they react to Edgar? How and why was Edgar forced to leave?
3) How did he arrive in New York?
4) Once there how did the Prince react? Did he announce himself properly especially in light of the fact that he had no knowledge of the Camarill laws. (Who was the prince, was it Moridin or someone else?)
5) How did Edgar reinvolve himself in the secret societies? An old friend, prodigious use of Dominate?
6) How did the Kindred in the city react to Edgar and his constant lies and contradictory stories?
7) One BIG item. Explain how his derangement manifested itself. Is this part of why he has gained Notoriety? Between his pushiness to investigate others misdeeds and his lack of forthrightness about his own past that could very easily aggravate other Kindred.
I think answering these questions will help to flesh it out. Animaezing any thoughts?
@Monkeygod - Can we get a run down of some of the other major Kindred movers and shakers in NYC and the surrounding metro area? NY by Night I think is a bit different than how you will portray NYC.
| Master Costanzo Giuseppe Beschi |
The Sabbat - Aside from rumor and heresay I know little of these Vampires having never encountered them in my long unlife. I prefer to keep it that way based on what I have heard.
The Camarilla - A farce of an organization. It promotes bootlicking and nepotism. Much like human governments it exists to sustain its own interests which are not those of its members but of its rulers.
Anarchs - I thought all of the Anarchs were now the Sabbat. The younger generation of rebels accomplish little change by working outside of the system.
Clan Tremere - An island of knowledge surrounded by a sea of ignorance and incompetence. Perhaps if the Camarilla were structured similarly unlife would not be so unjust. It has its own failings but no system is perfect, in many ways it is similar to my beloved church. Failure is frowned upon and competence is rewarded.
Clan Ventrue - Contemptible fools. They run round and round in circles never achieving anything of lasting value other than the preservation of their own influence.
Clan Toreador - While I credit them for their patronage of the arts I detest them for the way they kowtow to the Ventrue.
Clan Ravnos - A strange dichotomy. In the land of spice to the east these Kindred are mystics. In the west they are thieves. Perhaps they simply were forced to adapt to the western mindset of ownership and therefore felt compelled to rebel and continue to rebel even centuries later.
Clan Gangrel - An example of how the world is turned upside down. Instead of letting these noble Kindred lead they are forced out of the Sect by the same fools that have taken it nowhere for centuries.
Clan Malkavian - I try to stay away. Being forced to confront the beast within is difficult enough with the little sanity I have left. I do not need to deal with utter madness as well.
Clan Brujah - Yet another example of a clan that would be infinitely preferable to the Ventrue for leadership over the Sect. The elders are wise and learned. I believe that the Ventrue sensing the threat posed by this clan has intentionally ruffled the feathers of the younger members causing them to lose what little self control they have and thus almost all of their credibility. A pity.
Clan Nosferatu - I have never knowingly engaged a member of this clan in conversation. Perhaps I have while they were wearing their masks but I am not sure. I believe that some of their members may be madder than Malkavians. Staying out of their realm should ensure peaceful interaction and what more could someone want from those who are cursed but for them to be far far away?
Clan Tzimisce - I encountered some of the elder members of the clan on my journey from the east. I found that being respectful and trying to adapt to their custom of hospitality to be nerve wracking, especially when the last Kindred who failed to abide by their rules is your chair at the dinner table. The fact that I claimed to be Clan Gangrel whilst engaging them in conversation no doubt was a wise choice on my part. The Sabbat brethern should be slain on sight as rabid dogs, or so I hear.
Clan Lasombra - If their manipulation of the shadows is not one step removed from infernal practice I do not know what is. Hopefully they will step through said shadows never to return.
Clan Giovanni - Yet another clan I have had little interaction with. They practice the bastard magic of Necromancy and their powers are little match for the true masters of the Art, Clan Tremere.
Clan Setite - As with the Giovanni, their ways are mysterious to me. I brush off most of what I am told about them as nonsense, who still worships ancient pagan Gods proven long dead? At least human wiccans can say they use it as an excuse for getting some sex.
Clan Assamite - Deadly. Our clan made a perilous mistake in crossing them for the empty promises of the Ventrue. In my opinion we backed the wrong horse.
the Salubri - Clan Tremere has stated that this bloodline is one of demon worshippers and soul stealers for centuries. Strange rumors on the demise of their clan and the birth of mine have surfaced. I do not listen to them nor do I care about them. Much like other endangered species they are a curiosity, a bygone relic of ancient days best forgotten.
Antitribu Clans - How does one give up their clan? Blood is blood whether they like it or not.
Garou - Luckily I have never encountered any on my travels and hope that I never will. Though perhaps if the Ennui ever overcomes me this will be a quick way to die.
Mages - As a neonate my sire interacted with some of the august members of these mysterious humans in the land of spice. Their gaze was piercing but I never saw any wonders that I have not myself accomplished through the practice of Thaumaturgy.
Wraiths - Ghosts exist, they are the playthings of the Giovanni, but if they were so effective in what they did, why are they dead?
Faeries - No I won't even believe they exist no matter how many side references I see of them in my studies.
Demons - I believe they exist and I hope that the will of God keeps them in whatever Hell they were banished to.
Kine - I pity them, I feed on them, I hate them, I love them, I envy them, I wish I was still among them.
God - I pray daily that He forgives me my sins but the list keeps growing and I am too afraid to face Him after what I have done these long centuries. God forgive me, I knew not what I would do!
Edgar Collins
|
Edgar's History - The Vampiric history could use some tightening up (if it is more detail you want Monkeygod) by explaining:
1) The journey back to the US - was in on a plane a ship?
2) The time on the reservation, how did dgar blend in and live with the Navajo? Even if there are no Dreamspeakers among them were there Garou? Were there Hedge Mages? How did they react to Edgar? How and why was Edgar forced to leave?
3) How did he arrive in New York?
4) Once there how did the Prince react? Did he announce himself properly especially in light of the fact that he had no knowledge of the Camarill laws. (Who was the prince, was it Moridin or someone else?)
5) How did Edgar reinvolve himself in the secret societies? An old friend, prodigious use of Dominate?
6) How did the Kindred in the city react to Edgar and his constant lies and contradictory stories?
7) One BIG item. Explain how his derangement manifested itself. Is this part of why he has gained Notoriety? Between his pushiness to investigate others misdeeds and his lack of forthrightness about his own past that could very easily aggravate other Kindred.I think answering these questions will help to flesh it out. Animaezing any thoughts?
@Monkeygod - Can we get a run down of some of the other major Kindred movers and shakers in NYC and the surrounding metro area? NY by Night I think is a bit different than how you will portray NYC.
It will take a bit to get all this in the narrative, but is doable.
Thanks!
Edgar Collins
|
Moridin's been the prince of NYC since the 1970s, so it would depend on when Edgar got there.
Aside from him, and Sturbridge, i'd have to check my books to see who, if anybody might still be around the city.
Ok did some more editing!
;)
I also introduced a Ventrue in 1963 in New York (is there a name you want me to use for that vampire?)
I got 1973 as the year I presented myself to the prince would that be Moridin or someone else?
And how would the prince respond to a neonate who seems unable to tell the truth (and talks to Lenore often) ie a Malkavian right there in front of them?
| Monkeygod |
Couple of other things to add in:
Moridin is an incredibly infamous vampire, a known diablerist whose name is often invoked to frighten neonate vampires.
Other canonical vampires who play big roles are Theo Bell, Sasha Vykos, Fatima al-Faqdi, Lucitia, Anatole.
Been rather busy with some stuff, but I hope to be able to sit down over the next few days and check my books and work out a bit more world info, including what's going on with some of the big plots that took place, various clans current doings, etc.
If there is anything any of you are curious about, plotwise, or with a clan, feel free to ask! The more you guys work with me, the more fleshed out and real everything becomes.
PS,
Everything that happens in this game will be made cannonical in my world. If ya kill somebody important, discover a new clan, etc it will be official in all my games!
| Dennis Harry |
I read the Clan Novels when they came out. I do remember that Atlanta fell to the Sabbat, Clan Gangrel left the Camarilla (which I mention in Beschi's impressions), the Camarilla took New York, and that Theo Bell killed Marcus Vitel.
Obviously the NY plot did not happen and I am pretty certain that Vitel was either not in the picture or a minor character next to Prince Jennifer of DC. You also mentioned that Atlanta did fall to the Sabbat at some point.
The thing about the novels, the Nights of Prophecy sourcebook, and the Transylvania Chronicles is that most of what took place would have been known only by the participants (discounting the fall of the cities), it is not until the Gehenna book that events happen on a global scale.
Beschi's impressions assume that the Ravnos still exist and that something took place between Saulot and Tremere (though I assume the Council of Seven would try to distort these events). Not sure about Goratrix but then he is sort of marginilized in the Sabbat anyway before the destruction of teh Tremere Antitribu.
If any of this is absolutely not true let me know.
As far as the status of other clans and sects beyond all of this I think it would be more interesting to find out in game. It appears that Beschi, Thackery and Edgar are a bit sheltered in that they are self absorbed and probably not too terrribly interested in the general doings of the other Kindred in their recent pasts.
Can we assume that these events are somwehat old and cold, 5-10 years in the past? Can we also assume that things are more or less status quo from there at least until we start making waves?
Love that what we will do will shape your other games :-)
Edgar Collins
|
OK did some more editing...
Still need to know a few things from MG (as posted above)?
Moved ranks in computer to medicine instead as I do not see Edgar as ever taking the time to learn how to operate a computer (a task too frustrating for him to perform!).
Will continue to revise!
| Monkeygod |
Ok did some more editing!
;)
I also introduced a Ventrue in 1963 in New York (is there a name you want me to use for that vampire?)
I got 1973 as the year I presented myself to the prince would that be Moridin or someone else?
And how would the prince respond to a neonate who seems unable to tell the truth (and talks to Lenore often) ie a Malkavian right there in front of them?
Ventrue's current name is fine. 73, different Prince. Not sure who, will need to check.
Don't think the prince would care bout u bein a Malk, so long as you followed the Traditions, stayed outta trouble, etc
| Monkeygod |
I emailed Talomyr, who said he was rly busy lately n wouldn't be rdy. Told him I could wait as we still have one more prelude or I could bring him after game start but I haven't heard back from.
I think I'll begin Edgar's prelude tonight, but he needs to also finalize his bio before the full game starts.
Think I'll also try to recruit via another gaming site, just to see. If all goes accordingly, id like to start no later than Wed at the absolute latest.
Edgar Collins
|
unless your really opposed to it, and with good reason, I think i'd like for Lenore to be part Navajo. Just makes more sense to me that way.
Oh and you need a better name than Running Bear, way too cliche.
Maybe suggestions for a new game
"Name that Navajo"I guess I will pull a beleivable name out soon...
| Monkeygod |
Ok couple of things:
1) Edgar's player(sorry u post too much him so I forgot ur actual name lol) please make your prelude posts include Edgar as part of the spolier tag, its minor but just helps make things a bit easier
2) once we begin the actual game with everybody posting together sans spoiler tags(for the most part) id like it if speech was Bolded to make it easier to pick out and notice. Also, do not use Italics, as I will use that specially or unless I give the Ok.
3) Dennis, I don't think I have your email, can you shoot me one @ Dmb1481@gmail.com pls? Would like to chat about Beschi a bit privately, nothing bad, just something I want tween just us.
Edgar Collins
|
@ Dennis, got ur email, and I'm going to reply to it now.
@ Edgar, where exactly is your haven?
Haven ideas: (figure I need a few.... ;)
Basement and sub-basements of the Hoboken museum, it is a historic location!
Also in Syracus at the University campus
Lincoln tunnel
Subways
| Monkeygod |
OK so we are going with three players?
Should be interesting though I am surprised there was not more interest.
3, with the potential for more later on.
@ Edgar, Until you pick where you are currently, I can not respond. You can have more than one haven, if you have the resources or their sparse, but I have to know which one your currently in.
Everybody: as we will begin the actual game shortly I need you all to pay attention to your posts and re-read them once or twice before posting, so as to catch any missing words or wrong spellings. I'm good at guessing, but as this is true game time, everybody needs to make sure their posts are written correctly.
And just to make sure it doesn't seem like I'm harping on just you guys I always do the same. Especially when I'm using the spolier tag or some other modification to the post.
Finally please remember that from now on, all converstion/talk needs to be in bold, and yes that means from me too.
| Monkeygod |
ok lads, first official post is up. sorry if it seems disjoined a bit, but i want each of you to complete the end of your preludes and then jump forward to the current night(whichever it may end up being)
Also, one big houserule:
It does not cost you any blood to rise each night. I never played by that rule when i learned the game, and i've never invoked it since. Just doesn't sit well with me.
Edgar Collins
|
DM
Edgar being reminded of his single-mindedness in hunting down his sire and the recent humiliation at the hands of the prince gains a new derangement....
I propose an Obsession with gaining power, for too long he has set idle while others collect power and influence, so as not to be at the mercy of others ever again Edgar is now obsessed with power!
| Monkeygod |
Alrighty guys, hope your enjoying this so far, I know I've enjoyed running it. Once I get each of you set in the right direction, we're take a small break to go over feedback. A DM buddy of mine did this and afaik its worked out well for him.
Here's how its gonna work: I want feedback on the game as a whole, your part of the game, the other players in a positive, constructive manner and myself as an ST in a likewise fashion.
Answer these, and there will be a minor XP bonus. Answer them really well, especially if they better the game and perhaps I'll award a special ST boon.
| Dennis Harry |
I have some feedback now.
Game as a whole - Great idea for a campaign, focusing on a threat that is usually a side show in most Vamp games is pretty interesting.
I would like to see a little more detail on the who's who. Sort of the way you would see in a by Night book. Movers and shakers of each clan and generally how they relate to one another and to us if applicable. Especially in light of the amount of allies and contacts that Thackery has listed.
Thackery - I had a character very similar to this one in All Flesh Must Be Eaten. I love the concept and think the execution has been well done so far. In some ways it would seem like he has dissociative disorder with multiple personalities the way he uses several identities. The paranoia is being well played but not overplayed.
Edgar - Edgar seems like a more "typical" Malkavian. At least until the scene where Lenore was cut off from communicating and he went off the deep end, then it felt like he had hit another level of madness. Loved the interaction with the Prince, I could see that being insanely tense in a table top game.
Monkeygod as a Storyteller - Well done so far juggling the various characters in different locations. I like the emphasis on our backgrounds as well as starting with the Prologues. I do similar things when I run game, I feel like it makes us more connected to our characters which is pretty important in a non hack and slash RPG. I am still not clear on how exactly we will all come together but I am looking forward to finding out.
Edgar Collins
|
I like how things are going, the idea of leaving the city opens up some possibilities to have run ins with alot of interesting people/places/things, I assume the journey will give some time for role-playing as well as the "guys out and away from any haven".
My hope is for several events prior to even making it to the reservation.
Any sign of werwolves? Hedge mages?, other fell and foul beasts?
Oh wait we are the fell and foul beasts....
I am hoping for a van with UV and tinted windows (and bullet-proof).....
I have enjoyed my prelude and events with the prince.....
Heading for more typical Malkavian now....added derangments will do that! ;)
Thakery reminds me of a PC I had in paranoia but I think all the PC's were paranoid in that game. I enjoyed the back and forth where he clearly presented the case that they had profiled him and were trying to get response "C" out of him. I loved it.
Master G. The detail in the background was impressive, I am going to say it takes big brass balls to go back that far and track that much history. It might be fun but would consume alot of time...
Story-telling and chronicle wise I think it is early to tell....
I know for certain I want more! So that is something...;)
Edgar has been very passive since the onset of his mental illness and embrace, I am thinking the new derangement will change him to being more active....(waiting to see what MG has in store (or story) for me....
So far so good......
| Monkeygod |
ok Edgar, you are definitely NOT gaining obsessive/compulsive with regards to gaining more power.
Moridin is a 5th generation Assamite, while Catherine is a 5th gen Lasombra. You did not, will not ever stand a chance against them. You stepped way out of line to a powerful "prince" and got smacked down for it, plain and simple.
The derangement I have in mind will be an intense, supernatural fear of total darkness. Just need to finish off the exact mechanics.