Would it hurt to be able to turn this ability off on my familiar, there are a couple I could care more too use.
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OK. Having to interpret here...
You want to be able to turn off the Patron-granted familiar ability such as Familiar of Restored Spirit or Familiar of Keen Senses?
I don't think that does what you want. You can decide to not use the ability even if you trigger it. But you can't replace the familiar ability with a different one. That is an extra familiar ability that is locked in - just like the list of abilities of a specific familiar such as a Calligraphy Wyrm having darkvision, flier, manual dexterity, scent, skilled (arcana, society), and speech as well as the unique Ink Spray action and Stylus Claws ability. You neither pay ability slots for those, nor can you trade them out for other abilities.