Right - here's the story. We just started our campaign. I found a new group online, they all seem like great people - and they still do. Our GM is completely new to tabletop games, though he's watched and read many things on Pathfinder and he seems to have it pretty together for a first time GM. So, trying to be nice, I make a pretty standard character - a regular hero-type, neutral good, the whole 9 yards. Three sessions later, and the world is ending (of course). The campaign is heavily roleplay focused, so this is our first combat. Right at the end of the session, the GM "cuts off my character's head". I put it into quotation marks, because it was a fade to black, and he never really confirmed whether I died or not. I'm hoping I didn't - I really like my character - but he asked me to make a new one anyway. He was so smug about it, as well, the bastard. We riff back and forth, and I don't think he's actually killed him off, but I'm going through the motions anyway. 'Fine, I thought. You want to play? Let's play...'
Here's my revenge plan: my next character. I've got 8 years of Pathfinder experience under my belt, so I'm not a completely new player - I've seen a thing or two. I think the perfect thing to mess with him would be a little insanity, just to show my GM the ropes with Pathfinder. I want something that's simultaneously extremely effective, and completely out there. What I have so far is this:
Daisy, the Destroyer of Worlds, is a Synthesist Summoner Gnome. He (yes, he) will make his Eidolon into a pouncing death-machine with the quadruped base form. Here's the catch - the form is an adorable puppy. And he never goes out of it. When spoken to, he will do his level best to only respond with "Woof". As in, not a bark, but actually speaking the word through the mouth of a dog. Stupid, yet effective. Eventually he might become Huge size and really live up to that whole Destroyer of Worlds schtick, but for now, he's medium (for combat purposes only, he's still a cutie in the fluff [or would that be in the fur?]).
I'm looking for ideas to supplement, or entirely new ones to use instead of this. Base requirements are: All Paizo content (i.e. no 3PP), ideally no crazy reliance on items, and it has to be something that would work well, LOOSELY, in a high-society setting (for instance, a dog is fine, but no elephants). My party already has an Aasimar Sorcerer, a Human Mesmerist, and a Catfolk Rogue. I was the front-line/striker (all our other members are ranged), so I'd like to fulfill that role still - otherwise, my first instinct was to make a social god, but we have two versions of that already... Not keen on making a third, unless there's a really good idea.
REMINDER: This is all meant in good fun. I'm not trying to sabotage the game at all, I'm just trying to mess with him a little - and I know he's going to laugh along with me. I hope you people understand what I mean, here - it's mostly meant as a joke, but it will be my backup character in case he pulls a fast one (I'm telling you, we think exactly the same, and he could very well do it). Our next session is just under a week from now... Paizo Forums... SHOW ME WHAT YOU GOT!!!
No crazy reliance on items... are you sure that you're playing the right game?
There's a couple of traits which let you communicate without speaking. They're probably also useful for making the puppy dog eyes effectively: gesture expertise or expressive pantomime.
The Destroyer of Worlds might want to pick up the swallow whole evolution at some point & to make that work well you'll need some feats into grappling.
I was looking for no crazy reliance on items because I was trying to make it more about the build, rather then the supplements - I'm perfectly fine with using items to upgrade my character, but I don't want my character to be dependent on them.
And thanks for the advice, avr, those sound like good suggestions.
