Hey all, I've got a bit of a flavor pickle that I'm looking for help with. So for my group's next kingmaker campaign ill be playing a ratfolk underground chemist/makeshift scrapper rogue. His backstory revolves around faking his way into and through most of wizarding college (because it was the only institution of higher learning in his home city) with a combination of alchemy, magic items, and sleight of hand, then faking his own death before an exam where he was sure to be outed and fleeing to where he now has joined the PC group for an expedition into the lawless river kingdoms, still under the pretense of being a wizard. Im planning on making heavy use of alchemical weapons and wands to maintain the charade, but still need some appropriate item to use as an improvised weapon for his makeshift scrapper ability. My first thought was a false wizards staff with compartments that he could embed wands in to conceal their use, but finding no means of making that work by RAW I am looking for other options.
So, what would a rogue pretending to be a wizard use as a melee weapon that qualifies as improvised? My current frontrunner is to use wands themselves as clubs, and flavoring it as him having figured out ways to bring out small amounts of their magical power at a time to enhance their impact and damage when swung, which would fit well with his Supernatural Improvisation ability. Im still unsure if wands as weapons wouldn't have some harsh mechanical downsides given their fragility though, so im looking for more suggestions for thematically appropriate items.
ps: i know that the counterfeit mage archetype is made for such a backstory, but it didn't reflect the variation of means he uses to fake magic well enough for me, and doesn't stack with underground chemist.
faking his own death before an exam
Dude, been there!
So, what would a rogue pretending to be a wizard use as a melee weapon that qualifies as improvised?
A humanoid's thighbone, or other bone from something bigger; pretend your extra bludgeoning damage comes from necromantic properties.
A randomly-shaped piece of wood with a sharp end that was blasted by lightning, or looks like it was; pretend your extra piercing damage comes from being "energized."
A large test tube, the bottom heavily stained in strange colors, the top broken; slashing damage, alchemical properties. Careful, it's fragile.
A traveller's any-tool can be made to look like a weird arcane object.
Hit them with a book. It's your 'spellbook'. Any extra damage might be from wards you've put on it, right?
I'm fairly sure a light crossbow is an improvised weapon when used as a bludgeon. Wizards use crossbows sometimes.