Meanwhile, down at Iomedae's Beard...

[Dicky Serpico]

"So, I guess they are sending SWAT to some Meet and Eat on some fancy ass estate. I guess they needed to send the Society's finest to schmooze a few hoity toity."

[Detective Dixon Hill]

Dix' shakes the dirty martini, pours and lights it on fire. "drinks up! Flaming dwarf-tini!"

[Ri'chard Beckett]

Ri'chard shakes her head as she downs another shot, "Shut your holster Dicky."

[Officer Willy B.]

Officer Willy shakes his head... then shoots his whisky, "keep 'me coming."

[Jolene Danner]

Oh boy... what have I agreed to.....

[Dicky Serpico]

Uh, Willy. This ain't that kind of bar.

[Ri'chard's Mom]

"Well Jolene, Dicky said you agreed to come over when he does later."

[Detective Dixon Hill]

"now that sh*%s funny"

[Detective Dick Shaft, suspended]

Ready to wet my whistle in The Beard, can you dig it?

[Rico Rodriguez, Int. Affairs]

Finally finding the bar, Rico looks around suspiciously.

"How by Abadar's Coin did you guys get approval for this place?"

[Officer Rikki Gunderson]

"Boys, we have a mission to take care of. Let's be at our best, like we did up in Alabastrine. The Society needs the best, screw all the rest. "

Rikki makes sure that Crunch has had his fun with his current chew toy, a certain scoundrel that goes by the name of Harv.

[Officer Willy B.]

"Insurance settlement. We know a good dwarf."

[Detective Dixon Hill]

"Dicky. Love the new bar. We put that insurance money to good use. Dunno what you did with the rest - but my normal blue discount on fees is working out in this business partnership."

Dix' slides the Jeggare red over to his favorite? hellknight.

[Ri'chard Beckett]

"Come on Dicky, the old place was as much of a hole as you are. At least this place has some charm."

[Dicky Serpico]

Rico, how did you get such a honeyed tongue?

[Dicky Serpico]

Demon infested? Sounds like Ri'Chard's mom.

[Officer Willy B.]

"She does have, what I'd call a world wound."

[Faustus Sulpicius Voralius]

The Inquisitor of Asmodeas accepts the glass, and gently swirls it to release the bouquet of the Chelish vintage. "Thank you, my friend," he says to the cop bartender. "Glad that I could help you lawbringers out. This sort of Chaos is not acceptable. "

He walks over to the wolf, who is playing with his chew toy. ."Such a good dog!" he says, scruffing up the head of the wolf.

[Dicky Serpico]

I'll go pretty low on Ri'Card's mom.

[Rico Rodriguez, Int. Affairs]

"Make an impression, that means keep it in your pants."

[Detective Dixon Hill]

"Dicky, take the ba'h. I gotta snazzy up for the here feast."

[Ri'chard's Mom]

"Bragging about being flat on the floor passed out drunk while I rifle through your wallet doesn't count hon."

[Officer Willy B.]

Back to the beard, a day before the feast...

[Ri'chard Beckett]

"The unprofessionalism in this room is just staggering."

[Dicky Serpico]

6pm? We got plenty of time to get lit before the feast.

[Dicky Serpico]

Ri'Chard! Why you gotta do a thing to a gnome?

[Detective Dixon Hill]

"that poor gnome... bleaching might be more merciful"

[Officer Willy B.]

"Crunch... really?"a

[Ri'chard Beckett]

"I just can't imagine that being a gnome servant would let her get enough excitement to prevent it. I've seen too many dead gnomes, and I'm not talking about the aphixiated ones in Dicky's closet."

You should be more concerned that Rico called you the member of a well oiled unit. You're getting slow Dicky."

[Rico Rodriguez, Int. Affairs]

"I'm not trying to be racist, but if there's anything dark magic-y going on, my money's on Xar'ku."

[Dicky Serpico]

Crunch! Rikki, normally you gotta pay good money for that.

[Detective Dixon Hill]

"damn dicky. You got burned"

[Officer Rikki Gunderson]

"Down, boy! " Rikki calls out to Crunch, her K9 partner. "Not everyone understands your investigative tactics."

The wolf walks bounds back to Rikki, but not before walking behind Dicky, talking. Quick sniff. The wolf cringes in a way seldom seen in a canine, and before he lifts his leg, Rikki shouts, "No!"

[Jolene Danner]

Well we are in the manor... mostly

[Officer Willy B.]

"What chef need diplomatic immunity? Whoever it is talk to Dick."

[Detective Dick Shaft, suspended]

We have to get in further than just the tip.

[Ri'chard Beckett]

"This place is great, they incorporate shrines to Abadar, Calistra, Desna, Shelyn, and the porcelain god all in one place."

[Officer Rikki Gunderson]

"Wow, Abadar is getting it on in this shrine!" says Rikki, when she notices that the four gods I the shrine contains the Lord of the First Vault, Calistria, Sheylin, and Desna. After she dusts the Abadaran altar, she asks, "You wanna polish the Calistrian shrine, Ri'chard? At least in deference to your mom?"

[Rico Rodriguez, Int. Affairs]

"Smoking room... just like they took away from the station."

[Officer Rikki Gunderson]

As Dicky seems to be trying to fast talk the gnome, the other officers in the team remind him that they are supposed to be making a good impression. It then dawns on the K9 cop that Ri'chard's mom would not be polishing a shrine...

[Detective Dixon Hill]

"dicky!"

[Mel the Construction Mage]

Its so weird in here I don't know what to say.

[Jolene Danner]

What to say? This hellknights feast is going to begin, someday.

[Dicky Serpico]

Mel! Good to see you again buddy!

[Officer Rikki Gunderson]

Rikki looks at Mel, shakes her head in a way suggesting that he should just back away and be safe.

[Detective Dixon Hill]

"Mel! Welcome to Iomadae's Beard! You want the Boar 'n Oyster usual?"

[Rico Rodriguez, Int. Affairs]

"At least there's a proper library..."

[Dicky Serpico]

Jolene broke

[Detective Dixon Hill]

Jolene: lord scion kirkus of dalmacc

Dix': "and jilad"

Willey: at tenagra

Ri'Chard: with his arms wide

Dicky: what?

[Ri'chard Beckett]

"Well Dicky, why don't you just shove it up your demon infested crack."