Diplomancers of the Society (here there be spoilers)

[Matthew Morris]

Ok, for something completely different...

I'm in the mood for stories on how parties talked their way out of combats.

My contribution, Level 1 Thornkeep:

Spoiler:

due to some high stealth, and higher diplomancy, I got the goblins playing dice to agree to a game. If we won, we'd be able to enter the tunnels. The cleric had a candle, so I had her light one, and the game was the three gobbos and I would each take turns holding our hand over the flame. Whomever held out the longest won the game.

I was playing a tiefling... So not only talked our way out of an encounter, I won the pot too :-)

[The Shifty Mongoose]

My contribution, which wasn't so much "talking my way out of a fight", but "directing it toward uselessness":

Rise of the Goblin Guild, level 2:

Spoiler:

My inquisitor, who introduced herself as "mostly dwarven" offered to move in first and scare the goblins. While she could get one of them shaken at a time, they still all threw their bombs and alchemist's fire at her; being a tiefling who didn't like to have that fact advertised, she just waded through all the firey goop while her team-mates loosed arrows and sling bullets. She was glad to have diverted a potential problem.

Then we got to the leader of the titular guild; I offered to accept punishment in the form of burning alive, but the budding crime boss replied, "Actually, I'd much rather chop you to pieces."

"Oh."

Then battle was joined.

[RC-1207]

I resolve all of my fights by diplomacy. I do diplomacy by gun. Never trust someone who you cannot shoot. Therefore, I can trust everybody, and diplomacy goes great.

[Disk Elemental]

Alright, I think I've told this story before, but it's just too perfect not to post here.

Spoilers for Frozen Fingers:

I'd like to start this out by describing our table:
Sorcerer 1
Wizard 1
Cleric 1 - (Cayden Cailean)
Witch 1
Sorcerer 2 - me

So, my 16 HP gnome sorcerer was our de facto tank, in a scenario filled with enemy barbarians.

We're talking to the guards outside of Skelg's house, and we're doing our best to get past them without fighting (due to us having no melee fighters, or tanks). We manage to convince one of the guards to have a race to the end of the block with our wizard, when they get about half-way to the end, our cleric trips the other guard, then we all run inside, slam the door and cast "hold portal." After noticing we left him to die, our wizard cast "grease," in front of the guard he was racing, then took off down an alley after the guy blew his reflex save.

After getting the mission from Skelg, and meeting up with the wizard, we headed to the warehouse. After a few minutes of searching for a way in, we gave up, and, at the cleric's suggestion, went to get a drink at the local tavern. 6-7 Rounds later, the cleric and my sorcerer, were completely hammered, and decided it would be a great idea to "serenade" the room with the Andoran national anthem. Somewhere between the third and seventh verse, the cleric decided the best way to celebrate freedom was to take his pants off, and light them on fire.

Needless to say, we're banned from that particular tavern.

After getting pitched out on the street, our cleric did the best/worst possible thing, and walked up to the guards outside the warehouse. The conversation went something like this:

Cleric: I-I seem to have lost my pants, could I come inside and change?

Guard 1: No, get the hell out of here.

Cleric: Come on you guys, you wouldn't leave a man of god out here in the cold? (Rolled a 19 diplomacy).

Guard 2: Well okay, but these guys need to stay outside.

Me: But we're his pants carrying entourage, how do you expect him to have the right kind of pants if we're not there? (Rolled a 20)

Guard 1: My mistake, go on in.

We walk past all the enemies, and into the back office where whatshisname is. The conversation went exactly like this:

Him: Who the Hell are you?! And why does that dwarf have no pants?

Me: We're, uh, a cadre of male strippers who came celebrate your birthday. The dwarf is just a little excited, and got started early. (Rolled another 20)

At this point the GM is losing his s&*%, trying not to burst out laughing. The party gets inside the room, bars the door, draws the curtains, then I cast color spray. The guy rolls a 1 on his will save, passes out, we tie him up, gag him, and the cleric steals his pants.

Unfortunately, now we have to get past all the guys outside... that's when the cleric has an idea. He called all the minions together, in order to bless them for their hospitality. Two color sprays later, the encounter was over.

[Daedalaman]

Disk Elemental wrote:

Alright, I think I've told this story before, but it's just too perfect not to post here.

** spoiler omitted **...

That may just be the best story I've ever heard. You sir get a cookie.

[BigNorseWolf]

The town guards wish the bring Elando Cline in for questioning. They try to arrest him in the bath house.

My high charisma diplomancing sorcerer Fabrizio , takes Elando, dips him back and passionately kisses him, trying to hide his face. No luck. He assures the guards that its all a big mis understanding and he'd happily appear in court tommorow.

Guard: "Look, I understand you're getting paid by the hour here...

[Under A Bleeding Sun]

So, I run a regular pfs game biweekly for some people, and most don't really play outside my game. One week we did and 2 players from the slot I run joined in. We talked our way through one encounter and fascinated our way through another, so we really only had the boss fight. The players from my game were shocked because they always fight first and ask questions later. Their like "how is that even possible". It was a good time.

[Muser]

This is from Eyes of the Ten part Drei

Spoiler:

So as we were chasing Mr Bigbad, hellbent on finishing the fight, the rest of the party notices my ranger carrying Skelg's unconscious body while they run. "Wha'? Think of the weregeld I can mooch off this git! 'E's a jarl afterall!" Actually picking the ko'd Ulfen was done so that we could look at his gear when the chase was done and not out of character mid-chase(the way it's usually done), but that random act of greed by my character paved the way for a hilarious happenstance of Diplomacy.

After getting the ship aloft, Vasco, the aforementioned ranger, ties Skelg to wherever and enjoys the aeronautics. It's only when the vessel is starting to enter freefall that the trophy viking becomes relevant again. Seeing Skelg bouncing dangerously on the deck, Vasco picks him up and goes to see the commotion below, following the nigh-omniscient party monk. There the scene of massacre is quickly swept aside as the perpetrator enters the hold and swears to end our lives for doing the same to her husband.

Cue a loud "ahem" and "You mean Skelg? 'E's right 'ere. Got quite the beating 'e did!". A d20+15 Diplo roll later, and Natalya is giving an impromptu air ship piloting lesson to an amateur crew of her former adversaries.

And the return trip was that much grander with a sore but grudgingly thankful Jarl in tow.

[ElyasRavenwood]

Refuge of Time

:

Well I have a cleric of Asmodeus with a vey hight charisma and diplomacy score. He was able to talk the angel down from hostile to helpful and convinced it that the people he was working for were wicked and he shouldn't be protecting them, and that we were trying to prevent an ancient evil from awakening, all true, ......The angel left without fighting us.

[Katisha]

I tend to avoid combat - and can say that I've gotten to level 11.1 having only ever done damage to one person (myself, twice due to Confusion effects).

Normally I try to diplomacy past the conflicts - and I often do a good job of it... here's an example of an adventure normally done with a lot of combat - where I sort of changed things around...

Race for the Rune Carved Key:

I'm a bit of an over-the-top Face character... and I check with the rest of the players if it was Ok for me to just "Talk our way out" of the encounters. They say "no fighting is ok" so...

First mission: We're given a mission to ambush a shipment just outside of town. We want what's in the wagon, and aren't real concerned with how we get it. So I turn to the other players and say, "let's just walk right up, tell them we're here to pick up the shipment, and walk away with it."

Several players chuckle and say "yeah, sure...". One insists on hanging back in the woods and getting ready for the fight. He's a fighter rogue after all...And here's what we do.

Spells cast:
Aura of the Unremarkable & Glibbness

and we walk plainly down the road from town to the camp site. We have some GREAT RP for 10 mins or so game time... "Great job you guys have done! We'll take it from here. I'll be sure to mention you in my report - how exactly do you spell your name? M-O-O-K-#-4? Great! oh, do you think you guys can hitch the wagon up for me? And my guards and I will be on our way and you can get some well deserved time off."

The Saves for the Aura were DCs 22+, and Bluff rolls (Taking 10) 60+.

The player in the woods responded "60 WHAT?" when I gave the judge my bluff number. So I told him "Well, I could take 20 and get a 70+, but I can only do that once per day...and we might need it later". I even tipped them with a counter good for a "special service" in the local house of easy virtue... Departed with names and descriptions of all the Aspis Agents in the transport detail...

Later in the game the same player was shocked when I took 10 on a Perception and got a 12... esp. after I explained that it was a class skill and I had a rank in it. "Yeah, this PC is built for social settings."

Later encounter:
The party of adventurers gather outside the suspects door. The intention is to scare him away from doing something, to get him to leave town. The rogue checks the door for traps, finds an alarm and removes it, unlocks door, and steps to the back of the party. I, in misty Mistmail step to the door and, as the cleric swings open the door, into the room. Swirling me cape with a continual flame spell on the lining around to my back so the "flames" swirl up around me, I pull a Masterwork whip from my belt where I have two, and it bursts into flame (Hellfire trait). Looking at the target sitting on the bed, I point the whip and says:

"So, do we talk? or do we move on to other options?"

Target sees a Cheliaxian woman, clothed in fire & smoke, with a flaming whip that is scorching the carpet. Intimidate check? - ah, can I take 10?

Moving on to Diplomacy with the same target, I guide him to the window and show him a man across the street - "clearly watching your hotel... you must know that you are being watched right? Soon they will come for you..." Unknown to the target, that "man" is one of the adventurers (in contact with me via a message spell), covering the street in case the target runs for it. I explain to the target in a whisper (heard by all the adventurers via message) that I can get him out of town - if he leave right now. I'll use a Vanish spell to get him out of the hotel and take him around the corner and to the closest stable - where he can get a fast horse and ride to Westcrown (or someplace else).... I even got him to pay for the horse.

Almost all of the encounters went like that... It was esp. wonderful to be in a ball room with 10 or 15 other tables, and in hard combats - as we "danced" our way past the fights. We did need to take a half hour brake in the middle, so the other tables could finish up their fights and catch up to us...

[Katisha]

I'm often given the task (or take it myself) of gathering information" from captives. And I try to make the task as pain free as possible...

Some examples of tactics for getting information from captives. Everyone always does the Intimadate/torture/threat-of-death thing. (Sigh!) Try this instead.

Diplomacy:

"Darlin', things will go so much nicer for you if we could just be friends". She slids into bound individuals lap, "You'd be AMAZED what I can do for my friends... I'll have a few days free after this job, and I'd like to spend it with friends. You'd like to be my friend" wiggle-wiggle "wouldn't you?"

or if you have too...

Intimidate:
Captive Uthdan Warrior: "Go ahead and kill me! I do not fear death, I will have died a warrior!"
Katisha: "Honey, I never kill people. No, I think I'll take you home with me, to my little country house just outside of Westgate. I could use another Page Boy!..., Perhaps, if you're really 'good', in time you can work up to being a footman... We'll have such fun! My servants have these cute little uniforms!"

Or if we are rushed for time (in game or out) she can just use Detect Thoughts:
Detect Thoughts to get information from prisoners -

Katisha: "Who sent you to kill us?"
Mook: "You'll never make me talk!"
Kat: "Where did you first meet this masked man?"
Mook: "huh?"
Kat: "How much did he pay you? "
Mook "Hay! that's not fair!"
Kat: "and where did you put the money?"
Mook "Now wait, that MY money!"
Kat: "Where were you going to meet him after the job?"
Mook "La-la-la-la, I can't hear you!!"

[Jayson MF Kip]

Fate of the Fiend:

Us: "You wanna fight?"
Princess of Jitska: "No."
Us: "Okay."

And everyone lived happily ever after.

[Mike Bohlmann]

Muser wrote:

This is from Eyes of the Ten part Drei

** spoiler omitted **

That's pretty similar to what my party did. We made friends with him based on what many of us had done for him in his original appearance. This is why EotT is great - it brings this stuff back around.

[Muser]

Yeah, two characters had met the ol' popsicle early on in their careers. I don't think the interaction would have gone quite so smoothly otherwise.

[Roasa Annarey Hellena de Noire]

hmm.. let's see..

There was...

The Green Market:

Roasa pulled out the silver aspsis badge she has had for a long long time.. (severing ties) in the middle of a fight with some thugs and their boss. The boss, Narris Devane, took a hit to the chin and decided that Korvosa would be nice this season and departed the market at high speed with 2 hp left. Roasa hissed that 'you fools are ruining bigger plans than 'your foolish boss' has in mind.' (Bluff: 38)

The Disappeared:

Basically the first part of this scenario.. Roasa curb stomped the bluff/diplomacy/intimidate tests. The GM said it was the fastest he'd ever seen someone walk an (literal) elephant through the party without drawing notice.