Fighters. Wizards. Who would win a pie-eating contest?

[Heathansson]

Fighters. Hands down.

[Mikaze]

Depends.

Does the Fighter have Monkey Grip?

[Heathansson]

Monkey grip.
It's a pie, not a monkey.
You've been watching too much Temple of Doom.

[Slatz Grubnik]

Holy cow heathy.. calm down.. i scroll down the list of recent posts on messageboards and your name is on every last one of them!! lmao

[Heathansson]

If we don't have fighter vs. wizard threads, what do we have?

[Slatz Grubnik]

Umm.. pie?

[Vattnisse]

A high-CON wizard would totally p0Wn a low-CON fighter at pie-eating.

[Heathansson]

Yeah but a low con fighter is allready a corpse.

[Mothman]

At low levels a fighter would get to eat more pie, but once you hit higher levels, it'd be the wizard.

Wait.

They do need to kill the orc to get the pie first, right?

[Benchak the Nightstalker]

Wizard.

Craft Wonderous Item + Small Bag of Holding + Resistance to Acid = Win

[theporkchopxpress]

Benchak the Nightstalker wrote:

Wizard.

Craft Wonderous Item + Small Bag of Holding + Resistance to Acid = Win

oh yes I can see it now:

"Actually sir, I'm not sure that is the intended use of a 'handy haversack'."

"But it's a pie eating contest, and I wanna treat those jock-fighters a lesson! Just tell me 'can' you do it?"

"Fine! Give it here, but all sales are final, I don't want to hear you whining if you puke up a pair of apple boots, or a rubarb quarterstaff."

[EileenProphetofIstus]

The fighter would win because the wizard would use it to start performing division mathmatics.

[KnightErrantJR]

Fighters. The fighter can afford combat reflexes, and when the wizard stuffs his first pie, BAM! Pie eating does cause an AoO right?

[Crimson Jester]

I was going to say a wizard with a reduce spell could just shrink all the food and gobble it all down faster but then I read the rules and it would just shrink the wizard....argg what an apprentice mistake sigh

[Ubermench]

The wizard would summon a horde of minions to eat the pies for him, leaving the fighter bloated and unable to defend himself.

[seekerofshadowlight]

ya must eat the pies yourself.....then there are fat wizards as well....corse spellcasting isnt allowed in pie eating would be unfair to cast..Mcmuffains ravenous hunger Be for ya start

[Kirth Gersen]

They'd never get to EAT the pies.
The fighter tries to use flint and steel to start a fire to bake the pies, but doesn't have enough skill points to take Survival (after maxing out Perception), and fails.
The wizard says, "magic supercedes all skills," and fireballs the pies, leaving nothing but charred dough bits.
They declare the contest a draw.