A week before Christmas, my mailman brought to me:
A large gre-en dragon min-i.
On the first day of Christmas my true love gave to me
A dryad in an oak tree.
On the second day of Christmas my true love gave to me
Two plus 1 gloves.
On the 3rd day of Christmas...
Come on you creative types let's roll this out!
On the 5th day of Christmas my true love gave to me 5 golden rings of magic,
four riding doves,
three potions of elf control,
two +1 gloves,
and a dryad in an oak tree.
On the sixth day of Christmas my true love gave to me,
Six Unseen Servants, Five golden rings of magic, four riding doves, three potions of elf control, two +1 gloves, and a dryad in an oak tree.
On the seventh day of Christmas my true love gave to me,
Seven salty sailors, Six Unseen Servants, Five golden rings of magic, four riding doves, three potions of elf control, two +1 gloves, and a dryad in an oak tree.
On the eighth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me:
Eight blades a'gleaming, Seven salty sailors, Six Unseen Servants, five golden rings of magic, four riding doves, three potions of elf control, two +1 gloves, and a dryad in an oak tree.
Your Friendly Neighborhood Dalesman
"Bringing Big D**n Justice to the Bad Guys Since 1369 DR"
RPG Superstar 2013 Top 32
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On the eleventh day of Christmas my true love gave to me:
Eleven vorpal greatswords, ten demonic cohorts, nine mithril chain shirts, eight blades a'gleaming, seven salty sailors, six Unseen Servants, five golden rings of magic, four riding doves, three potions of elf control, two +1 gloves, and a dryad in an oak tree.
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On the Twelvth day of Christmas my true love gave to me:
Twelve Scarab-trapped-in-amber Amulets of ressurection, Eleven vorpal greatswords, ten demonic cohorts, nine mithril chain shirts, eight blades a'gleaming, seven salty sailors, six Unseen Servants, five golden rings of magic, four riding doves, three potions of elf control, two +1 gloves, and a dryad in an oak tree.
That was fun...and i was gonna go with 12 AP issues, but i stuck with in game theme
On the Twelvth day of Christmas my true love gave to me:
Twelve Scarab-trapped-in-amber Amulets of ressurection, Eleven vorpal greatswords, ten demonic cohorts, nine mithril chain shirts, eight blades a'gleaming, seven salty sailors, six Unseen Servants, five golden rings of magic, four riding doves, three potions of elf control, two +1 gloves, and a dryad in an oak tree.
That was fun...and i was gonna go with 12 AP issues, but i stuck with in game theme
Well we could do a real life one -
On the 1st day of Christmas my true love gave to me, a Paizo download to save a nice tree...
On the Thid day of Christmas my true love gave to me:
three Crown Royal dice bags, two Purple Paizo d20s, and a Paizo download to save a nice tree.
Crown Royal dice bags are as much of a gaming staple as the dice.
Chelaxian Citizen Advocates Taking Demons for Cohorts
In an attempt to foster Holiday goodwill amongst his fellow Pathfinder Society members, Chelaxian Citizen David Fryer was overheard singing the following verse:
On the tenth day of Christmas my true love gave to me:
ten demonic cohorts, nine mithril chain shirts, eight blades a'gleaming, seven salty sailors, six Unseen Servants, five golden rings of magic, four riding doves, three potions of elf control, two +1 gloves, and a dryad in an oak tree.Edit:
What else indeed?
A concerned citizen of Cheliax, visiting Absalom on business, was overheard giving the following commentary on Citizen Fryer's lyrics:
"I'd expect that Chelaxian to have a really good explanation for having demonic cohorts instead of devilish ones - unless he meant to say demonic consorts, of course. Then I think he'd avoid violating any by-laws, so long as he kept them in line. Or better yet, in chains. Preferably cold iron..."
Chelaxian News Network has just received an edict from the Hellknight Order of The Scourge stating that, in the spirit of the Holiday season, the standard sentence of 66 years of hard labor will be commuted if Citizen Fryer turns himself over to their authority immediately. His sentence will be commuted to 66 lashings with a wet aboleth at an undisclosed 'correctional facility'.
Any sightings of Citizen Fryer should be reported to the nearest authorities.
We now return you to your seasonally scheduled frivolity.
Sorry David - I don't know what came over me... :P
Your Friendly Neighborhood Dalesman
"Bringing Big D**n Justice to the Bad Guys Since 1369 DR"
Chelaxian Citizen Advocates Taking Demons for Cohorts
In an attempt to foster Holiday goodwill amongst his fellow Pathfinder Society members, Chelaxian Citizen David Fryer was overheard singing the following verse:
On the tenth day of Christmas my true love gave to me:
ten demonic cohorts, nine mithril chain shirts, eight blades a'gleaming, seven salty sailors, six Unseen Servants, five golden rings of magic, four riding doves, three potions of elf control, two +1 gloves, and a dryad in an oak tree.Edit:
What else indeed?
A concerned citizen of Cheliax, visiting Absalom on business, was overheard giving the following commentary on Citizen Fryer's lyrics:
"I'd expect that Chelaxian to have a really good explanation for having demonic cohorts instead of devilish ones - unless he meant to say demonic consorts, of course. Then I think he'd avoid violating any by-laws, so long as he kept them in line. Or better yet, in chains. Preferably cold iron..."
Chelaxian News Network has just received an edict from the Hellknight Order of The Scourge stating that, in the spirit of the Holiday season, the standard sentence of 66 years of hard labor will be commuted if Citizen Fryer turns himself over to their authority immediately. His sentence will be commuted to 66 lashings with a wet aboleth at an undisclosed 'correctional facility'.
Any sightings of Citizen Fryer should be reported to the nearest authorities.
We now return you to your seasonally scheduled frivolity.
Sorry David - I don't know what came over me... :P
Your Friendly Neighborhood Dalesman
"Bringing Big D**n Justice to the Bad Guys Since 1369 DR"
to steal a line from our friend Aberzombie -
mmmmm...lashings....
On the 6th day of Christmas my true love gave to me six loaded dice, five empty new Campaign Notebooks, four Mountain Dew, three Crown Royal dice bags, two Purple Paizo d20s, and a Paizo download to save a nice tree.
Funny Stuff.
Well done, Dalesman.
It is too late for David to edit to "diabolic"? Heh-heh: The Hellknights, they is a comin'.
The more people have moved to Dallas, the worse the drivers have gotten. And I'm comparing them to drivers in NY.
I remember when we were kids, we talked about Houston drivers. We can't do that anymore.
Me wants 4 more hours available a day!!!! Yupppiiiii
Bike parts.
On the 8th day of Christmas my true love gave to me eight new modules, seven Reaper minis, six loaded dice, five empty new Campaign Notebooks, four Mountain Dew, three Crown Royal dice bags, two Purple Paizo d20s, and a Paizo download to save a nice tree.
On the ninth day of Christmas my true love gave to me nine old DRAGONs, eight new modules, seven Reaper minis, six loaded dice, five empty new Campaign Notebooks, four Mountain Dew, three Crown Royal dice bags, two Purple Paizo d20s, and a Paizo download to save a nice tree.
On the tenth day of Christmas my true love gave to me ten ponies prancing (in honor of Sebastian), nine old DRAGONs, eight new modules, seven Reaper minis, six loaded dice, five empty new Campaign Notebooks, four Mountain Dew, three Crown Royal dice bags, two Purple Paizo d20s, and a Paizo download to save a nice tree.
I want everyone to quit killing eachother over b~&&*#@!.
Like on the 'front in WW I, if only for a day.
Amen!
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On the tenth day of Christmas my true love gave to me ten ponies prancing (in honor of Sebastian), nine old DRAGONs, eight new modules, seven Reaper minis, six loaded dice, five empty new Campaign Notebooks, four Mountain Dew, three Crown Royal dice bags, two Purple Paizo d20s, and a Paizo download to save a nice tree.
I assume the ponies are for animal sacrifices. ;}
On the twelfth day of Christmas my true love gave to me: twelve closeout 3PP D20 suppliments, eleven kilts commando, ten ponies prancing, nine old DRAGONs, eight new modules, seven Reaper minis, six loaded dice, five empty new Campaign Notebooks, four Mountain Dew, three Crown Royal dice bags, two Purple Paizo d20s, and a Paizo download to save a nice tree!
Sometimes I want a rocket launcher, but my wife says I can't have one. I would promise to use it only for good, though.
I could use it on the people hooting and screaming on their balconies all night, too drunk to understand that their neighbors might actually have jobs.
I could use it on the people who are running everyone else off the road because they're too busy texting to drive.
"If I had a rocket launcher... I would not hesitate!" --Bruce Cockburn
So many things I want:
1) Superhuman speed. As impatient as I am, this would be perfect for me. But then I'd get bored.
2) Superhuman intelligence. I mean, Reed Richards just whips up something to fix problems, why can't I?
3) Telepathy. Oh, wait, all I'd get would be the sound of crickets chirping.
4) Telekinesis. No, too many problems here.
5) Another five levels for my character. Just because I haven't gotten to play a 3.x campaign to 20th yet (only 15th now).
6) Some interesting new prestige classes to look at for divine characters.
7) My pick of 3 new magic items from any source I own that aren't artifacts. I promise not to ask for anything from the Epic Handbook either . . . .
8) The kinky Seoni calendar. Wait, that's something we'll all receive.
9) A time-machine. No, wait, that'd be bad for me to have too.
10) A new 6th edition PH. Since I doubt 5E will fix all of my problems with 4E. Might as well get a head start.
11) All of Ed Greenwood's notes on the Realms. Might as well go straight to the source.
12) Time to enjoy all this stuff and everything else I'm forgetting.
There, a gift a day. Might as well as for the sun, the moon, the stars, and everything else in the heavens while I'm at it.
I almost died the year the X Wing was in the Neiman-Marcus Christmas catalog. I mean, I'd rather have a Y Wing, but STILL...