Ah ain't scairt! Got me a fridge full of beer and a week's supply of Funyuns. Ah'm all set.
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Ah ain't scairt.
Ah ain't scairt.
Yeehaw!
Ah still ain't scairt.
Ah reckon so.
Ah ain't scairt.
Reckin so.
He obviously thinks you have a small mouth. A purdy small mouth. :PHe got a real pretty mouth ain't he? Ah reckin so.
Ah reckon so.
Time to continue reading a thread. Ah jest look at thuh purty pitchers.
I have french onion soup and a whole wheat badgah for lunch. :DI didn't know they made bread in the form of Taig. FAWESOME! Ah seen uh imuj of Badgahman on uh pie Miss Loretta made t'other day. Ah sed she awtuh sell it on thet Ebay thingamabob.
Ah tawk funneh evynown then.
Goddang hipsters.
I sure hope everyone out east is keeping their heads down. It could have been worse. The earthquake could have struck NOW. Ah ain't scairt!
Ah ain't herd nuthin.
They were red necked wallabies. Ayup.
Ah reckon so.
Yew got thet raht ol'feller.
Ah reckon so.
Mmmmm....squirrel stew.
starts playing banjo music
This led to a few minutes of hillarity as I thought up a whole scenario where my players have to escape from an elven rapist in the woods at night, that just got funnier the more I thought about it. banjo music Squeal like an orc!
Would it be better if we played some banjo music?
Whar'd evybuddy go?
Happy Birthday to me!
Yew tellum, Frank!
Goddang hippeh!
Ayup.
Ayup.
Mine!
Huh? Wuzzat?
Yew shor?
Mahn!
Ayup.
Ayup.
Ah reckon.
How many times do I have to tell you, I'm a redneck, I don't know how to read!! Now quit bringing it up! :P Ah trahd summa thet book lernin wunce. Didn't lahk it, nosir.
How you doin brother cousin Jimmy-Joe? Ah'm doin purty good, nephew pappy.
Ah reckon so.
Shewt it! Shewwwwwwtttttttt!!!!!
Ah reckon so.
Ayup.
Goddang hippehs.
Ayup.
Ah reckon.
Ah shor kin simperthighs with ya. Folks awtuh speek Inglish proper like.
Ah reckon so.
Did I ever tell you about the time I met Johnny Cash? It was back in 1995 and I was living in Montgomery, Alabama. I used to go and put flowers on the grave of Hank Williams Sr. once a week, because I promised my Grandma that I would just before she passed away. One day I was there and this big black pickup pulled up and out stepped Hank Williams Jr. and Johnny Cash. They were doing a benefit show together that night and had stopped in to pay their respects. I tried to slip off before they saw me, but it didn't work and they stopped to talk to me. Then they invited me to lunch! So where does Hank Williams Jr. and Johnny Cash take a person to lunch? Pizza Hut! It was awesome. Can I touch you?
Ayup.
The fighter just needs to get good magic equipment and get the greedy casters to buff him instead of themselves. Then he can be as awesome as everyone else.
Most NPCs don't have heroic levels because they don't have the motivation to adventure. They do what they can to survive, and their training and life experiences accrue them levels. Or do PCs never gain experience for their non-combat successes? Tim,the soldier on leave, who's barely in his mid twenties is as likely to hit the deck when he hears a robber shoot into the air as is Clark, the barkeep who's in his late fifties. Bob the farmer has a family back home he values way more than the orcs attacking the next town over, those orcs are "someone else's problem" Similarly, the monsters with class levels shown in the bestiary represent the lowliest threat the PCs would normally face. Of course there is an orc woman with commoner levels tending to the babies back home, of course there is an orc barbarian 4 leading the village back home and of course there is an orc warrior 1/expert 2 being his right hand man. The world isn't a collection of clones. Everyone has varying levels of skill and experience. It's just rare for an NPC to gain enough experience to keep leveling once the next level is almost twice the amount of experience he has gathered in 30 years of being alive. A world where everyone is a 1st level commoner is a much stranger world, actually. As for mechanically? A third level adept doesn't stand much of a chance against a first level wizard...It's the point of NPC classes. It gives the NPCs skills and some amount of combat ability without outshining the PCs. A first level bard is much more interesting than a third level aristocrat. And let's not forget that NPCs use 3 point buy for their ability scores and never gain full hit dice... By level 2, players outshine most level 4 NPCs all across the board.
A scenario should never be: You either die or stop being *insert alignment/class*.
Player wants to do something completely inefficient and time wasting. GM goes out of his way to stop the player from doing that inefficient thing because it's not in the rulebook. GM suddenly becomes a video game and unable to do anything outside it's script.
If i remember right, Machetes used to be reskinned scimitars in some versions of the rules. I guess someone wanted to give them access to machetes at some point. Or maybe these druids hail from the middle east.
Those arguing against druids with handaxes should remember that the druid gets two harvesting related weapons: the scythe and the sickle. |