Debilis, Demon Lord of Tea's page

Minions!

Discuss!

So down my cultists all fell, like lost little pups,
Through the fast closing rift, which swallowed them up.
But they heard me exclaim, 'fore they winked out of sight,
"HAPPY ARMASSE TO ALL, AND YOU'D BETTER MESS DESKARI'S PLANS UP REAL GOOD OR I'LL TORTURE ALL OF YOU FOREVER AND DON'T THINK THAT JUST BECAUSE I'M THE DEMON LORD OF TEA I WON'T BECAUSE I HAVE MY WAYS AND YOU WON'T LIKE IT IF I HAVE TO RESORT TO THEM!"

'Twas the night before Armasse, when all through the city,
All crusaders rejoiced! (Really quite a pity.)
Priests busy tending the wardstone with care,
In hopes that no demons would ever come near;

My cultists would soon be snug in their beds,
While visions of tea-leaves would dance in their heads;
I'd a nice pot of chamomile, the harvest was through,
And I'd just settled down for a nice cup or two,

When back in Kenabres there arose such a clatter,
I peeked from my demiplane to see what was the matter.
To my teacup of scrying I flew like a vrock,
Peered into its waters, and recieved quite a shock.

The wardstone'd been replaced with fire and smoke
Giving the lustre of mid-day to objects below,
When, what might you think that I finally see,
But the Storm King Khorramzadeh, demon ruler of Iz!

With a swing of his sword and a crack of his whip,
He announc'ed his presence. (Geez what a prick!)
More rapid than eagles his cohorts they came,
And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name;

"Now, quasits! now, succubi! now, hezrous and omox!
On, dretches! on nabasus! on, mariliths and vrocks!
Into the city! past the watch wall!
Now dash away! crash away! smash away all!"

And then, because writing a poem is ever so hard,
(Although you really must admit, I could've been a bard!)
I decided I'd finish the writing a bit later,
And handed the reigns to The Humble Narrator!

Sip. Sip.

Tea hee!

Why is everyone picking on me?! I'm a POWERFUL outsider, so stop it right now or you'll all incur my wrath!

This sounds hilarious but there is that problem of being able to punch through DR that requires good.

There's nothing at all hilarious about this! And the only problem I can see is the one Deskari's going to have when he finds out how much better my cultists are than his. Hah!