Aldebert Dunitee's page

"All in all, what I'm hearing just sounds fishy."

"I have this sinking feeling right about now."

"Let us not go overboard with all this."

"Of course not, you mean-spirited moldering hag! Cheliax stole our rightful dominions long before that, you sub-standard Abadarian substitute; and do not get me started on bravery, you prune-brained tart: the Empire bravely took on the scourges from the East AND stoically accepted the losses treacherously inflicted upon it in the West. You didn't see US succumbing to devil-worship, or whatever morbid pastime you Chelish boors have come up with of late" sputters and seethes the man, shaking at the implied insults and going a distinct shade of red in the face as a result. Turning to the other woman, he continues: "Do not pay any mind to anything agent Navhelan has to say in any capacity; she holds a position in the society only due to hardened nepotism, luck, and an admirable ability to carve people in twain, and the capacity to inflict that outcome repeatedly."

Hi Eadie!

"I was a participant my dear! Aldebert Dunitee, of the highland Dunitees. Late of the third Legion, fifth Cohort of the invincible Taldane Phalanx. And it was a minor inconvenience; members of the Phalanx are well known for their incredible vigor. Only a few minor cases of sunstroke due to the lack of hair after command had us shave it all off.We were in tip top fighting shape only mere weeks, nay, days after the outbreak. No matter what the treacherous historians will tell you" replies the man bombastically.

"Do not fret young lady" says Aldebert as he combs through his mustache with an ox-horn comb. "It would seem as if there are some minor activities taking place outside. Stay put as I do, and you should be fine; unless of course fog, gerbils, a stealth force of elite duegar or operation "Silent Tide" are in play. In which case, we should prepare to defend this apocryphal lodge and or taproom. But I am certain it will pass, much like that case of hair lice during the Taldane summer campaign of 4692."

"Some Pathfinders are in need of one more for a mission of the utmost importance! Inform me at once of your availability to assist them and that indolent suli Ashasar!" clamors the Taldane crossbowman.

Discussion thread is here. Looking like low tier? Maybe? Anyway. Tyranny of the Winds, part 3; having played the other two parts is not necessary, tier is 3-7. Will make a decision on who gets the seat based on party composition/tier.

"ISN'T THIS SORT OF THING JUST REFRESHING?!?! HERE, A GIFT FROM THE PHALANX AND THOSE PATHFINDERS OVER THERE, WHOEVER THEY ARE. NOW ONWARD! TO GLORY!!! BWAHAHAHAHA!!! HA!"

You are the recipients of Aid token #3:

***Token #3***

Current Boosts: Allied Offensive (Valoria Lackland charges by on her mighty steed!)

"Well, let us see what we have here. Ahem. It looks like Valoria Lackland, Seren's Seven, Teric Cain, Undiana Jones and Tessara Omelion are summoned to the Grand Lodge for the usual end-of-year good cheer and training and overbaked pies.Come on! Chop chop!"

Also have room for one more, subtier 7-8.

"EbonFist and GM Andrew! Whatever those monikers mean. Report to Corenthyn immediately!"

"Attention Pathfinder agents; apparently there is a need for a couple of relatively experienced agents to assist a team of agents in the traitor province of Cheliax. Please inform your assigned venture captain if this interests you."

Need two more characters for high tier 7-16 Faithless and Forgotten, Part 2: Lost Colony of Taldor. We will be completing the series.

"Nice to see that the Ulfen people have taken to grow spare limbs upon their body at the behest of Taldane excellence. In the meantime, FELIX PICKLEWEED AND WIZBANG FIZZLEPOTT!" roars the Taldane Crossbowman from earlier. "Venture-Captain Drandle Dreng awaits you! DO NOT MAKE SUCH A PROUD TALDANE HERO AWAIT! ONWARDS!"

Please report at your earliest convenience though.

Aldebert Dunitee wrote:

"You … epitome of mental deficiency!"

“Caused by ‘the weight of thousands of years of Taldan martial tradition flowing through my veins’ do you think?”

...
*squints* “You don’t have a twin brother do you, Bertie?”
...
Eadie tilts her head to the other side. “Does the Phalanx attract many fanbois, Bertie?”

"No! Caused by the god's boundless sense of humor, you insufferable hydrocephalic gourd! And my brother is neither a twin nor does he have the sense given to little children, that impotent horse riding dullard!" rages Aldebert, verging on apoplexy. "Of COURSE we have fans! The Phalanx is filled with them; who wouldn't be instantly enamored at the heroism, bravado and unabashed manliness exuding from the vast cohort of mankind's finest?"

"You endless source of baudry tales, you mixed up everything AND somehow managed to mangle a well-known expression! It is as if the gods conspired to make manifest the epitome of mental deficiency!" blusters Aldebert.

"Of course I don't you flaccid Chelish tart! The amount of character the Phalanx exudes has been known to cause children to manifest beards, women to faint and spontaneously become quick with child, and cattle to moo loudly in the middle of the night!"

"The hero of Taldor, his most excellent, wise and good-looking Drendle Drang calls upon the following Pathfinder agents to report in forthwith!"

The Taldane crossbowman clears his throat before calling out: "Yangrit Foehammer, Kayne, Wizbang Fizzlepott, Kirrote and Felix Pickleweed! We know you are hiding in here! Do not make me, Mathilda and the strength of character only a member of the Phalanx can bring to bear come on in there and flush you out!"

Marching into the lodge with his crossbow slung across his shoulders, this Taldane man begins screeching. "If I may get the attention of the following agents: The one that Hides in Closets, the one nicknamed Aarvid, Aiden Richter, the fellow nicknamed Tektite, Esh Kethar, and Minkowski! You have been summoned by the master of Swords to attend a speech by one of the secessionist scum, whose damage upon the Empire will be remembered for aeons by the true inheritors of Aroden's will, and not those sissies who turned to diabolism at the first sign of a problem."

"Indeed! Let us reunite the codex with the bank. And you are very welcome Venture-Captain Li, but success was nearly guaranteed when I was called upon to provide aid" comments Aldebert, twirling his mustache as he eyes Aram Zey with disgust. "Shall we set forth?"

Cure Light Wounds: 1d8 + 1 ⇒ (8) + 1 = 9
Cure Light Wounds: 1d8 + 1 ⇒ (4) + 1 = 5
Cure Light Wounds: 1d8 + 1 ⇒ (2) + 1 = 3
Cure Light Wounds: 1d8 + 1 ⇒ (2) + 1 = 3
Cure Light Wounds: 1d8 + 1 ⇒ (7) + 1 = 8
Cure Light Wounds: 1d8 + 1 ⇒ (7) + 1 = 8
Cure Light Wounds: 1d8 + 1 ⇒ (5) + 1 = 6
Cure Light Wounds: 1d8 + 1 ⇒ (5) + 1 = 6
Cure Light Wounds: 1d8 + 1 ⇒ (6) + 1 = 7

And with that, Aldebert has regained his Taldane Vigor.

"Good" comments Aldebert as he nods curtly to Vim, pocketing his wand. "Although we have decided to withdraw in good order, let us not forget that that senile elven dotard has made threats from beyond the grave. All that local mumbo-jumbo about the elderly, magical tattoos and the sort would have me dismissing such tomfoolery. But I did witness a venture captain die and return from the grave as a little girl so that she might join us on a quest to combat another incarnation. Thus, perhaps there is some grain of truth to otherwise dreadful local customs."

"Pah. Taldanes are well known for their imperious, fearless nature Navhelan. It is the primary reason we had an empire. Also a reason we lost an empir... NAVHELAN! UNHAND MY IMPECCABLY MUSCLED TORSO FORTHWITH, AND STAY YOUR HAND AWAY FROM MY CHISELED BUTTOCKS! I AM A SOLDIER OF TALDOR, NOT A CALISTRIAN FLOOZY, EVEN IF THE CONFUSION IS COMMONPLACE!" roars an outraged Aldebert, who gesticulates as if both panicked and confused as to how to deal with this newfound expression of gratitude. "SOMEONE GRAB A NEWSPAPER AND BAT HER OVER THE HEAD WITH IT! IT WORKS ON HOUNDS!"

51 Damage? I've got a wand for that. Someone mind activating it?

"COME AT ME, YOUR DIRTY POCKET OF TURBULENCE! GLORY AWAITS!"

Mathilda, strike #1, RS, DA, PBS (Haste): 1d20 + 14 - 2 - 3 + 1 + 1 ⇒ (13) + 14 - 2 - 3 + 1 + 1 = 24
Damage: 1d10 + 6 + 1 + 6 ⇒ (7) + 6 + 1 + 6 = 20
Mathilda, strike #2, RS, DA, PBS (Haste): 1d20 + 14 - 2 - 3 + 1 + 1 ⇒ (1) + 14 - 2 - 3 + 1 + 1 = 12
Damage: 1d10 + 6 + 1 + 6 ⇒ (3) + 6 + 1 + 6 = 16
Mathilda, strike #3, RS, DA, PBS (Haste) (Grit for Touch AC): 1d20 + 9 - 2 - 3 + 1 + 1 ⇒ (12) + 9 - 2 - 3 + 1 + 1 = 18
Damage: 1d10 + 6 + 1 + 6 ⇒ (6) + 6 + 1 + 6 = 19
Mathilda, strike #4, RS, DA, PBS (Haste + Hasted extra attack): 1d20 + 14 - 2 - 3 + 1 + 1 ⇒ (9) + 14 - 2 - 3 + 1 + 1 = 20
Damage: 1d10 + 6 + 1 + 6 ⇒ (10) + 6 + 1 + 6 = 23

"Of course I would take more blows! I am Taldane! A specimen of physical perfection! It would be offensive if this electrical vapor went after anyone else! Besides, someone has to take care of the elderly!" Chides Aldebert, a crazy smile upon his lips.

Mathilda, strike #1, RS, DA, PBS (Haste): 1d20 + 14 - 2 - 3 + 1 + 1 ⇒ (13) + 14 - 2 - 3 + 1 + 1 = 24
Damage: 1d10 + 6 + 1 + 6 ⇒ (3) + 6 + 1 + 6 = 16
Mathilda, strike #2, RS, DA, PBS (Haste): 1d20 + 14 - 2 - 3 + 1 + 1 ⇒ (1) + 14 - 2 - 3 + 1 + 1 = 12
Damage: 1d10 + 6 + 1 + 6 ⇒ (5) + 6 + 1 + 6 = 18
Mathilda, strike #3, RS, DA, PBS (Haste) (Grit for Touch AC): 1d20 + 9 - 2 - 3 + 1 + 1 ⇒ (10) + 9 - 2 - 3 + 1 + 1 = 16
Damage: 1d10 + 6 + 1 + 6 ⇒ (1) + 6 + 1 + 6 = 14
Mathilda, strike #4, RS, DA, PBS (Haste + Hasted extra attack): 1d20 + 14 - 2 - 3 + 1 + 1 ⇒ (14) + 14 - 2 - 3 + 1 + 1 = 25
Damage: 1d10 + 6 + 1 + 6 ⇒ (3) + 6 + 1 + 6 = 16
I'm feeling bold. Let's use that reroll on shot #2
Mathilda, strike #2, RS, DA, PBS (Haste): 1d20 + 14 - 2 - 3 + 1 + 1 + 5 ⇒ (20) + 14 - 2 - 3 + 1 + 1 + 5 = 36
Mathilda, strike #2, RS, DA, PBS (Haste) (Confirm????): 1d20 + 14 - 2 - 3 + 1 + 1 ⇒ (2) + 14 - 2 - 3 + 1 + 1 = 13

What a tease. So 34 damage, clustered shots. Also, something went wrong with my third shot last round, not sure how but you tell me how we should resolve it. You can roll it yourself if you feel that it should have been rolled.

Hopefully someone has a Breath of Life. Otherwise, just bring the body back.

"Now COME YOU INSIGNIFICANT CHARGE IMBALANCE AND FEEL THE MIGHT OF THE PHALANX BEAR DOWN UPON YOU!!!"

"Why thank you my elderly companion in arms! Now would you make Eadie cease her incessant prattling by bringing that gem to the fore and using it in some capacity while I show this one the true mettle of the Phalanx?" he shouts while cranking Malthilda for another set of shots.

Mathilda, strike #1, RS, DA, PBS (Haste): 1d20 + 14 - 2 - 3 + 1 + 1 ⇒ (15) + 14 - 2 - 3 + 1 + 1 = 26
Damage: 1d10 + 6 + 1 + 6 ⇒ (4) + 6 + 1 + 6 = 17
Mathilda, strike #2, RS, DA, PBS (Haste): 1d20 + 14 - 2 - 3 + 1 + 1 ⇒ (13) + 14 - 2 - 3 + 1 + 1 = 24
Damage: 1d10 + 6 + 1 + 6 ⇒ (9) + 6 + 1 + 6 = 22
Mathilda, strike #3, RS, DA, PBS (Haste): 1d20 + 9 - 2 - 3 + 1 + 1d1d10 + 6 + 1 + 6 ⇒ (7) + 9 - 2 - 3 + 1 + (6) + 6 + 1 + 6 = 31
Mathilda, strike #4, RS, DA, PBS (Haste + Hasted extra attack): 1d20 + 14 - 2 - 3 + 1 + 1 ⇒ (16) + 14 - 2 - 3 + 1 + 1 = 27
Damage: 1d10 + 6 + 1 + 6 ⇒ (1) + 6 + 1 + 6 = 14

I do have clustered shots.

"COME NOW YOU ATHMOSPHERIC ANOMALY AND FACE YOUR ULTIMATE OPPONENT! FOR TALDOR AND THE PHALANX, CHARGE!!! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

Of all the weeks to be going first in initiative...

Aldebert throws himself aside!

Reflex: 1d20 + 12 ⇒ (16) + 12 = 28

And with strange grace avoids most of the electrical barrage sent his way. "Aha! Again the Dunitee curse strikes afoul! Fear not, I've dealt with this sort of environmental manifestation before!"

Mathilda, strike #1, RS, DA, PBS (Haste): 1d20 + 14 - 2 - 3 + 1 + 1 ⇒ (14) + 14 - 2 - 3 + 1 + 1 = 25
Damage: 1d10 + 6 + 1 + 6 ⇒ (1) + 6 + 1 + 6 = 14
Mathilda, strike #2, RS, DA, PBS (Haste): 1d20 + 14 - 2 - 3 + 1 + 1 ⇒ (9) + 14 - 2 - 3 + 1 + 1 = 20
Damage: 1d10 + 6 + 1 + 6 ⇒ (4) + 6 + 1 + 6 = 17
Mathilda, strike #3, RS, DA, PBS (Haste): 1d20 + 9 - 2 - 3 + 1 + 1 ⇒ (4) + 9 - 2 - 3 + 1 + 1 = 10
Damage: 1d10 + 6 + 1 + 6 ⇒ (1) + 6 + 1 + 6 = 14
Mathilda, strike #4, RS, DA, PBS (Haste + Hasted extra attack): 1d20 + 14 - 2 - 3 + 1 + 1 ⇒ (12) + 14 - 2 - 3 + 1 + 1 = 23
Damage: 1d10 + 6 + 1 + 6 ⇒ (3) + 6 + 1 + 6 = 16

A barrage of bolts fills the air, but few if any find purchase in the elemental's hide.

"Only if the person you are talking to isn't a dirty Qadiran. Or a Varisian for that matter, for entirely different reasons. Varisians will talk the ear off a statue and each second you spend with them is a moment they try to take the contents of your coin purse" replies Aldebert with aplomb, following the two women into the large chamber.

"As for Abyssium, I would posit with utter certainty that I know little about it. Something I will rectify with aplomb once we return to civilization. But it is likely of little import, otherwise I am certain it would be mentioned in the many Codices of warfare the Empire possesses. Now if you'll excuse me, I seem to have a habit of finding ghosts, golems and other unnatural things when presented with a statue. Mathilda, let us ready ourselves for war" he exclaims, cranking the crossbow's gear and placing a bolt within, ready for trouble.

Aldebert begins to open his mouth, but in a moment of petty wisdom decides to instead ingest the remaining potion of Cure Moderate Wounds. "To the Phalanx."

CmW: 2d8 + 3 ⇒ (5, 6) + 3 = 14

Discarding the empty container, he looks wearily at the zelekuts. Let us hope the servants of Order have not been corrupted yet.

I actually have damage I haven't updated my statblock with.

"Ah..." emits Aldebert as the last bolt finds it's way into flesh and stone. "Well. Aha. Perhaps we can ... mend this away.. Ahem. I'll begin pulling these troublesome bodies off" he adds before beginning the process of "fixing" his mistake. "Oh, Taldane Exhuberance, why must ye lead me to such easily avoidable pitfalls. No matter. Tomorrow we shall do better!"

"I only need ten" replies Aldebert, as he "staples" both the cleric and the wizard's torsos to the floor with five regular bolts each. "There. Now they won't return from the dead without looking rather silly."

Aldebert, still stiff and cold from the attempted spell, storms up to the dead man. "Filthy dolt. Do we need him positively dead? I vote that we do."

Reflex: 1d20 + 12 ⇒ (3) + 12 = 15
Reflex (GM reroll): 1d20 + 12 + 5 ⇒ (10) + 12 + 5 = 27

"You saucy Sasquash, you cannot silence Glory!

"Pah! He cannot; reverse priapism has taken hold of his entire family line five generations ago!"

Reflex: 1d20 + 12 ⇒ (8) + 12 = 20

"No NAME??? I'LL HAVE YOU KNOW THAT MY NAME IS ALDEBERT DUNITEE, OF THE TALDANE PHALANX, FIFTH LEGION, THIRD COHORT" shouts an outraged Aldebert who barely manages to dodge out of the way of the worst of the explosion. "FURTHERMORE" he adds, cranking Mathilda the crossbow, "WE TALDANE CANNOT BE NEITHER POMPOUS, NOR BLOWHARDS. THOSE ARE WORDS YOU SILLY PEOPLE MAKE UP TO DESCRIBE TALDANE WANNABES. STAY ALIVE YOU CANTANKEROUS SCROTUM, I SHALL BE DEALING WITH YOU NEXT."

Mathilda, strike #1 vs Dwarven Lady, RS, DA, Holy: 1d20 + 14 - 2 - 3 + 2 ⇒ (18) + 14 - 2 - 3 + 2 = 29
Damage: 1d10 + 6 + 2 + 2d6 ⇒ (8) + 6 + 2 + (2, 6) = 24

Assuming that her being staggered is because she's about to die, the following attacks will be against the flying dude, Ascalar.

Mathilda, strike #2 vs Flying Human, RS, DA, Holy (Favored Enemy): 1d20 + 14 - 2 - 3 + 2 + 2 ⇒ (1) + 14 - 2 - 3 + 2 + 2 = 14
Damage: 1d10 + 6 + 2 + 2d6 + 2 ⇒ (2) + 6 + 2 + (2, 2) + 2 = 16
Mathilda, strike #3, RS, DA, Holy (Grit for vs Touch) (Favored Enemy): 1d20 + 9 - 2 - 3 + 2 + 2 ⇒ (19) + 9 - 2 - 3 + 2 + 2 = 27
Damage: 1d10 + 6 + 2 + 2d6 + 2 ⇒ (2) + 6 + 2 + (5, 6) + 2 = 23
Mathilda, strike #3, RS, DA, Holy (Grit for vs Touch) (Favored Enemy), Critical Confirmation: 1d20 + 9 - 2 - 3 + 2 + 2 ⇒ (16) + 9 - 2 - 3 + 2 + 2 = 24
Damage: 2d10 + 12 + 4 + 4 ⇒ (8, 4) + 12 + 4 + 4 = 32

"AND NOW, TO PROPERLY CHASTISE YOU, YOU SYPHALITIC HAUNT!"

Dragging self out of Thanksgiving coma...

Aldebert, emerging from the tunnel, chuckles heartily. "Well then. The dregs of the western marches being coerced into servitude to a machiavellic duo. Let us put an end to that! For Taldor and the Phalanx!" he shouts with gusto, loosing a bolt against the dwarven woman.

Mathilda (spending grit to resolve against touch), DA, PBS: 1d20 + 14 - 3 + 1 ⇒ (15) + 14 - 3 + 1 = 27
Damage: 1d10 + 6 + 1 ⇒ (4) + 6 + 1 = 11
Extra Evil damage: 2d6 + 2 ⇒ (2, 1) + 2 = 5

Let me know if she is evil (add another 2 to the attack roll) and if we are in an underground terrain.

"Pah. The only thing to be afraid of in the Bank of holy Abadar is to have not done your part in civilizing this world. As such, I am unsure as to whether this is a proper Bank" interjects Aldebert, breaking his silence. "There is something odd though. Like a Qadiran chastity belt. Baton girl! Do you or your diminutive dragon detect any traces of arcane deception hereabouts?"

Hmmm... For some reason I feel like replaying Serpent's Rise...

Are we fatigued yet? We could try and stim ourselves up with either Allnight or a Restoration.

"Your mind contains recipes for spirits and liqueurs? By Abadar's sacred key, it's a treasure that musty be protected to the death!" comments Aldebert, who nonetheless tries to assist the actual experts, more often than not being completely unhelpful. Which does not prevent him from manipulating the codex, a practice which results in a rather green around the gills crossbowman around the eleventh hour. "I would love to hear more about the customs of Ancient Azlant. After all, we Taldane descend directly from them in an indirect fashion. Now, while I do believe that the haggard crone's reincarnation will be present, it is nonetheless no reason to go charging in sick and tired. Phalanx command tried doing that to beat a column of the Taldane Horse once at the battle of Zarminzi, with the extreme emetic effects that are recorded in the history books. Dirty Qadirans taking advantage of our illness. Typical. And I believe her to be no better than any Qadiran. Except with the limitations of the mind that come from being her."

GM, does this mean we could purchase other things before we leave, before or after we rest?

Unfortunately my Taldan Barbarian is level 2. He's also an awful character.

I guarantee you this is not the peak of optimization here. How bad can he really be?

"Of course not you hydrocephalic hunk of starmetal. What he clearly meant was that the potion is not part of the standard infantry kit, and with good reason. We Taldane are master linguists. Unlike you dirty provincials, who cry out for devilish succor whenever things do not go your way. Did we call out for the Lords of the Abyss when our empire was stolen from us? No. We kept a stiff upper lip and soldiered on. In retrospect that was probably a terrible idea."

I just did. I had a rough couple days, I'm just catching up on significant posts (Things involving convoluted RP, the games I GM.)

Also, we should try and get all the crazy Taldanes in a single game.

Taldane assist!: 1d20 + 1 ⇒ (8) + 1 = 9

"Allow me to organize your notes in the manner codified by Phalanx command in 4683."

***A few minutes later.***

"A-HA! Now I remember why this codification system was discontinued in 4684. Allow me to return your notes to the chaos they were in" he comments, having made a mess of Watt's careful notes, some of which are currently stuck to the ceiling. "And now for the tried Phalanx tactic of... RUN. RUN WHILE HE IS DISTRACTED! BWAHAHAHAHA!"

Cool! Also

"We drink wine mostly, as proper people are supposed to. Wheat and barley is for making bread, not brewing that moribund soup. If Aspex hadn't stolen the empire with his lies, we could have taken the time to teach you people about the proper way to consume wheat. Although, I suppose it beats the state you were in before hand, munching on the dry grains for sustenance. Thank the Gods for mighty Taldor."

I took the time to invest in certain knowledges with this character, yet I am unable to help with this. Good luck!"

I'm already in a street fight with Eadie over the primacy of Taldor over almost everything in existence. So go ahead, I just want a +1 ring and a +1 amulet. I will take whatever bolts are left though.

Sorry, just got back from an extremely long day.

Aldebert, knowing that time is of the essence, wastes none in bringing in the various bodies. "It's nice to see that she hopes to see me in her next life. Although, if she keeps the same temperament, her next life promises to be short. If I may help myself to one of these rings and to one of these amulets, I feel that my enemies laughingly terrible attempts at hitting me will be even less successful. Take a note of that Navhelan."

Perception: 1d20 + 14 ⇒ (4) + 14 = 18

Passing by the priceless book, Aldebert continues: "If we had time we could set this crime scene as a disagreement between the Black Tulipe, or whatever her besotted name was, and the help. Alas. I would take the crime book but hold it to ransom for recognition of the Society as the clearly superior organisation. Now, if we are quite done here, let us move on to better things, such as the Hao-Jin Tapestry. Perhaps we will encounter enough besotted reptiles so as to quench Navhelan's thirst for... Whatever it is they thirst for in the old colonies."

Aldebert steps out towards the shop's entryway, poking his head out. "Then I shall have to come to her. Inform her that the weight of centuries of tradition is slowly moving in her general direction."

Mathilda, strike #1, RS, DA, PBS, Holy: 1d20 + 14 - 2 - 3 + 1 + 2 ⇒ (20) + 14 - 2 - 3 + 1 + 2 = 32
Damage: 1d10 + 6 + 1 + 2 + 2d6 ⇒ (5) + 6 + 1 + 2 + (2, 2) = 18
Mathilda, strike #2, RS, DA, PBS, Holy: 1d20 + 14 - 2 - 3 + 1 + 2 ⇒ (12) + 14 - 2 - 3 + 1 + 2 = 24
Damage: 1d10 + 6 + 1 + 2 + 2d6 ⇒ (4) + 6 + 1 + 2 + (2, 3) = 18
Mathilda, strike #3, RS, DA, PBS, Holy: 1d20 + 9 - 2 - 3 + 1 + 2 ⇒ (5) + 9 - 2 - 3 + 1 + 2 = 12
Damage: 1d10 + 6 + 1 + 2 + 2d6 ⇒ (9) + 6 + 1 + 2 + (6, 5) = 29

"It's not armed robbery! It's the Taldane Imperial requisition process! We're just dealing with angry natives."

"AGENT NAVHELAN! THE WEIGHT OF THOUSANDS OF YEARS OF INHERITED TALDANE MARTIAL TRADITION FLOWS THROUGH YOU! GIVE THAT SPECKLED CHICKEN HELL! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

"Clearly she must be speaking some sub-dialect I am unfamiliar with given her atrocious pronunciation. Inform her that I will be dispensing Taldane wisdom upon her as soon as she deigns to place herself in the presence of centuries of martial tradition" sounds off Aldebert as he goes for the assassin in orange.

The guards look human, and I don't know if they are evil or not. I'll be keeping things separate in the diceroller. Add 2 to hit if they are evil, not that it really matters given my poor subsequent rolls.

Mathilda, strike #1 vs Orange (Cover), RS, DA, PBS (Favored Enemy?): 1d20 + 14 - 2 - 3 + 1 + 2 ⇒ (15) + 14 - 2 - 3 + 1 + 2 = 27
Damage: 1d10 + 6 + 1 + 2 ⇒ (5) + 6 + 1 + 2 = 14
Xtra holy: 2 + 2d6 ⇒ 2 + (2, 3) = 7
Mathilda, strike #2 vs Orange (Cover), RS, DA, PBS (Favored Enemy?): 1d20 + 14 - 2 - 3 + 1 + 2 ⇒ (3) + 14 - 2 - 3 + 1 + 2 = 15
Damage: 1d10 + 6 + 1 + 2 ⇒ (7) + 6 + 1 + 2 = 16
Xtra holy: 2 + 2d6 ⇒ 2 + (5, 3) = 10
Mathilda, strike #3 vs Orange (Cover), RS, DA, PBS (Favored Enemy?): 1d20 + 9 - 2 - 3 + 1 + 2 ⇒ (7) + 9 - 2 - 3 + 1 + 2 = 14
Damage: 1d10 + 6 + 1 + 2 ⇒ (8) + 6 + 1 + 2 = 17
Xtra holy: 2 + 2d6 ⇒ 2 + (1, 1) = 4

"NOT YOU, YOU SURLY MOTH-EATEN ZEALOT! THE PRUNY SHE-ELF SPEAKING PIDGIN! THE ONE WHO SEEMS INCAPABLE OF UNDERSTANDING HOW TO WIELD A WEAPON! THE CLEARLY MENTALLY DAMAGED ASSASSIN WOMAN!"

Would it be too late to mention that he sounds like shrill John Cleese?

As Aldebert mulls over his options in the fog, he notices the still shut window besides him. Aha!

Move to open the window.

As smoke billows out the now open window, a Taldane trill echoes. "Not even magical fog can deter the Phalanx! Prepare for your thrashing!"

Mathilda vs S.O. (+ Cover), DA, PBS, Holy: 1d20 + 14 - 3 + 1 + 2 ⇒ (18) + 14 - 3 + 1 + 2 = 32
Damage: 1d10 + 6 + 1 + 2 + 2d6 ⇒ (8) + 6 + 1 + 2 + (6, 1) = 24

"Can someone tell what she is saying? I've never bothered learning the local pidgin, silly lot of nonsense that it is, and I wish to know if she is advocating surrender to my clearly superior combat skills."

She's not a half-elf is she?