"Dodgey bouncy happy Ked! What he stabs is gonna be so DED!
Ked dances around rather pathetically and gives a good swift stab with Stabby.
Stabby plunges true into the strange creature.
Ked gets eat weird ghost thing by self and not share any with Ulk. Maybe he make bombs out of Ked poop? Red blood bomb! Oh, Ked gonna coat stabby with weird juice and make zappy light crazy die blade
It doesn't work that way Ked. You can't just dip me in a dead magic monster and I become magic.
You will sees.
With a small squeak, Ked stabs the creature in its stomach, making it die with a small yowl. It's blood splashes out onto him.
The blood seems to be bad! It zaps him, dealing damage. But once he gets over the shock, his weapon seems to be zappy, just like the Eel!
Ulk walks back to the strange monster, crossbow ready just in case. He sees the monster dead at Ked's feet and comes over to inspect it, seeing all the damage his explosion caused.
"Ohh! These Booms be good! Now, I bestest gobbo... sure thing."
Ulk then moves back to the slither cave and looks around for anything nice.
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"Did he just say?"
Yep.
Me gonna stab him good.
Normally, I'd be inclined to disagree, Ked, but I'm actually a magic weapon now, so I'm pretty sure I have no idea how anything works, so stab away.
"Oh, Stabby, you Keds only friend."
Ulk, you notice, hidden beneath a pile of mice skeletons, the skeleton of a rat! You rush over to it, and pick it up. Then you see something rusty beneath it. You look in, and moneys! Now you will be the richest gobbos around!
torch arrives and sees the aftermath
"What happeneds here what was that Kaboom?"
"What you find, Ulk?"
Ked grins when he runs up to Ulk and pats him on the back. "Ha, that great! We rich! No share with others."
He look back as Torch arrives and shakes his head. "Maybe with him. He see this. Ugh."
Ulk's eyes shine with all the coins he found.
"Yes, Ked, we be rich! We need hide it or Bitey might eat all the goldies... the kaboom be a bomb mez made, Torch."
Ulk looks around, looking for someway to hide their treasure.
Finding nothing, Ulk has an idea and starts to put coins in his pants.
"Good idea, right? No gobbo dare to put hands inside other gobbos pants... or might find a sad surprise!"
At the other gobbos uncertainty, Ulk continues to assure them.
"Trust Ulk... I be clean... my poop be dry this days, no slimy, think it like little black stones..." with a sad face Ulk continues, talking more to himself. "No happy days... feels like pooping pine cones..."
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"Ulk spend too much time looking at smoke. Is good spot there!"
Ked snatches up the coins and starts camoflauging them in a nook he found, using mud, branches, and his gift for knowing how to make things look invisible to hide it.
"Good as invisible. Ked might not blow stuff up, but me smart gobbo. Now we can get and none else finds it."
Ked, I can't see it. How will we know where it is later?
Um...Stabby has good point. Shut up though, don't let Ulk and Torch know you don't know. Just dig everywhere later
Ked, they can't hear me. I'm a figment of your imagination brought on from hallucinations when you ate that proto-bomb that Ulk made two months ago.
What? Was most delicious pie ever. Taste like cheese and monkey brain with potato mushroom. Also,if you me imagine, why talk different?
Repression, compartmentalization, and insanity, mostly.
"Wait...where me put the coins?"
Looks at Ked and Ulk and shakes his head
" Your shiny yellow treasures are good. But mine is shiny glowy and pointy"
Draws out the "Dagger" from before
Kill and take?
Stealth is your strength. Steal it while he sleeps and you'll have two friends.
If I give you to Ulk maybe he help me kill and take?
But then you have to share. No, not worth it. Plus Bitey is friends with Torch and they will eat you if you try that.
You so smart, Stabby.
"Neat! Stabby is magic now too!"
Ked holds up the tiny dagger crackling with electricity.
"Gip is mighty sorcerer!" The young goblin proclaims as he hurries back down into the tunnels, waddling back and forth under the weight of his wonderful picture book.
As the other goblins are talking downstairs, Bitey has finally finished, and then found Fleck.
"heysa little gobbo" Fleck says, smiling at him, "Did you kills the slither?"
Bitey proudly presents the mangled remains. "Killed all of them! Other gobbos stupid, didn't help. Too scared, just run away somewhere." he says with a shrug, as his eyes wander off and he pulls one of his ears.
"Ha ha!" Fleck laughs. "You is little liar gobbo! But that ok, that mean you is smart! I teaches you stuffs, ok? When de others get back, we will have feast!"
Ulk looks unsure as Ked hides the money.
"Hum... you sure we can come here later to take the moneys? Fleck will not let we enter here if there be no more slither..."
Ulk thinks for a moment, before having an idea.
"Oh! Mez forgotten... from where the slither entered? If we be finding other way in, we come back latter!"
Yes we did what told. Now we get to eat.
Ulk, you notice a hole hidden behind a rock in the wall. As you look in it, you see it is half clogged with mud, but still functional. A faint sound of screaming animals comes from it, and you can see light near the end.
"Hehe... mez smart!"
Ulk enters the muddy hole, taking care to move silently.
"Hehe... mez smart!"
Ulk enters the muddy hole, taking care to move silently.
"If you jumps so carelessly into hole one will become your grave"
Bitey stares at the hole in the wall for a while.
"They not come back. Must be dead, more eats for Bitey!", he concludes with a satisfied shrug.
"More eats for Bitey and Gip!" The book toting goblin replies. "Gip can cooks it now with lots fire!"
"Wez will gives them five more minutes." Fleck says.
Ulk, when you reach the top of the tunnel, you see a mud pit, with a pair of young goblins slaughtering chickens. They are telling jokes an laughing whenever blood gets in the others eyes. You believe you recognize them from the cage, about a half-year ago, but you can't remember their names.
Ulk smiles at the joy of the little goblins. He prepares a bomb and throws it in the mud pit, not in a way to hurt the gobbos, but enough to cover them in mud. After this, he hides himself and goes back into the tunnel.
"Mez find exit! I think it leads to cage... Safe place, we can go back here later! If mez not remember, we be asking for that weird gobbo with that big purple wart..."
The goblins scream, looking round' for whatever splashed mud on them.
And fail to find the little goblin. After screaming and running in circles, looking disturbingly like the chickens around them, they settle in to their work again.
"You wastes time, now food probingly cold"
As Fleck sees Torch walk up the entrance, he smiles. "Ah-hee! Little Torchy gobbo is here too! Wez waiting for others, OK? You can wait too."
"Ulk is right behind me but hez to busy crawling thru mud to come"
" Don't know where Ked went"
Ked steps out if the shadows behind the others. "That cause Ked the invisiblest!"
Covered in mud, Ulk goes back to Fleck's kitchen. Hearing all the whinny of Torch about him being late, Ulk moves as silently as he can.
Once he is near Torch, he hugs him, all muddy and smelly.
"I be here, Torch, I be here! You miss mez, I know." Ulk then looks at examines Torch before continuing. "You all muddy and smelly... where you entered?" and then laughs loudly.
"Good, you all here. Now we have feast of freeedoms!" Fleck says. Grinning like a physchotic goblin clown (trust me, you do not want to see that), and then turns around, and yells, "Let the feast begin!"
Nothing happens except for a slight snoring sound from a nearby bush.
Fleck frowns, walks over, and kicks the offending bush, which awakens with a grunt. "I said," He growls, "Let the feast begin!"
"Oop, sorry boss." Says most of the surrounding forest. With the toot of a goblin trumpet (also know as a seagull on a stick), the trees draw back, showing a feast of immesurable goodness. There is pies, steaks, slugs, and even a vegtable. All the goblins are shying away from the hated green thing, but it looks interesting to you.
Fleck smiles, "After you are dons feast, we can play a game! Have fun little gobbo's! Todays you day!"
"Gip never have to eatzes couzins in cage again!" The tiny goblin declares in awe before running for the food, tumbling head or heel, and landing with his face on a slug. Never one to pass up food though, he started eating it like that. "Iz covered in crunchy burnt slime! Youz has to try!" He yells to the others enthusiastically.
What is this?
"Meh, Me not afraid"
Torch, upon eating the green thing, you feel a strange taste, unlike anything ever before. It seems to combat with your childish nature for a moment, but then you like the taste. Kinda like compost! you think as you munch.
Ulk rushes forward, taking a pie with his both hands. He sees a big gobbo taking also taking a pie and throwing in another goblin's face...
He jumps into the table and gestures towards him.
"Mez, mez, I be hungry also!" The force of the blow knocks him out of the table and a couple moments later he emerges, with the slimy and gooey fillings all over his face, nostrils and ears.
"Deicilous!"
Ked raises the ridge of what would be an eyebrow if he had hair and stares at the feast...he didn't trust the older gobbos...but after the others dig in he shrugs, saunters up like king of the world, and starts to scarf down what he can, making sure to stab an unknown goblin's hand when it was reaching towards his plate.
Something seems fishy, Ked.
That would be the fish, Stabby. Is pickled herring, is my favorite!
No, I mean, why would the older goblins give away food, when all they usually do is throw rocks at you?
Because we is awesome and did favor.
If the situation were reversed, would you do the same?
Ked gasps mid bite, stands up, food dribbling down his belly, and yells out "It's a trap! They're gonna stab us and laugh about how stupid we are to work for them!"
Real smooth, Ked...
"Why would you thinks that Ked?" Fleck says, "I not gonna stab you. Dere is reason for being nices tho." He smiles
"We bin the middle gobbos for so long. All the others, the seven tooth, the thistletop, and nettlewoods, they all don't even know we be here! So, we is training a new generation," he looks pleased at himself for knowing such a big word, "To be warriors! You iz gonna have da bestest foods, da bestest training, and even free time! We will make our name feared."
"Yes I sees what you mean. When we here killing the Horse snakes one of my songs made some of my cage brothers stronger. This must me a sign"
"For the next little whiles you can do what you want." Says Fleck, "But we will be needing youz soon. Ok?"
"Gip gonna look at more burny pictures and eat slugs." Gip replies, brushing the yucky vegetables off his food. "Unless Gip's mighty magic is needed for burning more horse snakes or bird dogs! Bird dogs iz terrible."
Torch can be seen swinging his dogslicer around trying to get used to the weight. Random trees and saplings will be his victims.
frustrated with his lack of strength he'll try using is voice to boost his strength again.
"Grow strong, grow fast, grow big and tall"
"Now watch as these tress all fall"
Tries to attack the trees again
While eating his delicious pie, Ulk looks into the sky and sees a big black bird flying in the sky.
That bird be big! Big enough even for big gobbos sit in his back and be flying like a bloody big black birdy bird!
The little goblin drops the pie into the ground and climbs the biggest tree around up to the top.
On the top of the tree, he sees as the bird flies back into the mountains. He points to the bird and yells.
he then giggles and starts to climb down. "I be calling you Birdy..." he then sees how high he is and tries to resist the urge of jumping, failing miserably. He then jumps from 30 ft. high.
Ulk, in a stroke of luck, lands on something soft. When he looks up, he is in what appears to be a large collection of sticks, and a bird, slightly bigger than her is, staring at him curiously, chirping. You recognize that it must be a youngling, as it is still quite downy.
Everyone else hears Ulk hit the nest, by the way. If anyone wants to do anything else, you can.
"Birdyyyyyyyy!" Ulk hugs the little bird, causing it to try to eat him. "Oh, I love you too... silly bird..." then looks around to see if anyone saw him and his new friend.
"Shhhh... do not speak... if they sees you, you be food..."
From the top of the nest, Ulk yells.
"Nothing here, just bird poop..."
The bird coos happily at Ulk, chewing on his shoulder contentedly. It seems to like him a lot, even licking at the smears of food on his face. It is then that Ulk thinks, Do birds have tongues?
The young vulture seems happy that the little goblin is here.
Ked takes Stabby out and looks for random victims to murderate, preferably small ones, like squirrels or chipmunks.