The guard, impressed with Caspian's brisk businesslike manner, opens the gate for you. He gives Vanya a respectful nod; it is clear that he assumes Vanya is a noble of some kind, who has Capsian as a herald and servant, Wyvurn as a bodyguard, and Jaegr as part of his retinue.
Collecting the gold, he mentions to Caspian that Bessie's Baldric is the best tavern -- "Head down the main street, go left when you see the fountain, and the cut parallel to the shore. It'll be about a quarter-mile down, near the docks."
"Thanks for tha tip, I hope mah parched friend makes it so far, he might smell a fine raost or fresh bread an get sidtracked."
Away from the guards....
"You think the guards might send us far away and straight intah gettin robbed?"
Jaegr thinks about it for a moment, "Anything is possible, perhaps we can ask around. If the townfolk assume Vanya may be some noble and we are his followers, it may serve us well to let them keep making that assumption for now."
The main street runs ruler-straight from the gatehouse down the center of the city, with cross-streets arranged perpendicularly to it. It is clear that this city was planned and laid out all at once, rather than growing up around a smaller town. The buildings are very tall structures of distinctive red brick, with white shutters and trim, in a style unfamiliar to you, but almost all of them are in that same architectural style. The populace seems to be largely human, with maybe a tad more high elven blood than is typical on the frontier; there are a fair number of wood elves and hill dwarves as well. Once, out of the corner of your eye, you catch sight of a gnome in a tall cap, peering out from a cellar window.
So far, the main street appears to be all commercial enterprises: stables, shops of varous kinds, taverns, and an inn. The shop buildings are tall enough that it seems possible that the shopkeepers might live in the upper stories. You can see up ahead that about halfway down the length of the main street is a big square with a fountain in it.
10 gp? I think we wuz robbed!
"No worries I only paid 5 up front and expect an official looking document in mah hands fer later on. This is out o tha emergency fund."
"Any idea how many guards an locals can recognize a document, but at tha same time cannot read it?"
*****rubs his hands together and smiles impishly***
As you walk, you pass a lady with a brass birdcage on her head, which is quite unusual even by elven standards.
To the left is a coffee shop, offering hot cups of hot coffee -- plain, with honey and clotted cream, and/or spiked with "hallulay."
To the right is a shop selling Oriental rugs from far-off Bailakash. Next door is their competition, an open structure in which a pair of dispirited-looking wood elves weave traditional blankets.
From two doors up, the smell of sausages on skewers, toasted on coals, reaches your nostrils.
One thin, elderly gent is walking a baby owlbear on a leash.
Coming up the other side of the street, you see a young rake, wearing a pair of swords, walking in a swagger; his tunic bears a very prominent logo in the pattern of a stylized key.
All of the signs are in High Elvish, with Common written below. Those of you who speak both languages are aware that sometimes the translations are a bit loose. For example, one large place's sign proclaims in Elvish script, "End of a Long, Happy Day -- Luxurious Spa Treatment." The Common translation simply reads "Happy Ending Massage."
Well, here's me. I'll see you guys later, okay?
"Hmmm... I may be inclined to get a bath myself, but I am afraid what my familiar may do. I'll pass."
"Wha does happy ending mean....oh I see."
Wyvurn will nudge caspian with an outstretched palm and nod towards the sausages.
"Finding a place to stay is much easier on a full stomach."
He'll give the rake a wide berth by eye him cautiously as that's the type that is probably looking for a fight.
The rake spots Wyvurn's actions, makes brief eye contact, and tips his head about a sixteenth of an inch, before continuing on his way.
Cricket pushes his way into the massage parlor.
Inside, there are potted plants and a small carp pond with a waterfall. Behind a marble desk is a high elven lady in a white toga, who greets Cricket with some bemusement. "And how may the Empire of Lily Petals serve you, Sirrah?"
Cricket speaks in perfect Sylvan or Wood Elf, whichever would be more appropriate (I can't remember exactly what Sylvan indicates).
Good day, my dear lady. I am Cricket of the Tuelvi and I have travelled many a long and dusty mile to be here today, and all the while, battling owlbears and staring at boulders burning with green, lambent flames, I have longed for the pleasures of a bathhouse. Where is the sauna?
She smiles at you charmingly, although it's clear she understood not a single word of what you said. Trying to appear charming, she takes a small silver bell off of the desk and rings it loudly.
A really big, incredibly ugly guy wearing nothing but a towel around his waist walks in and scowls at you. His face is yellow, with a huge blue nose and red rings under his eyes; his ears are floppy and semi-pointed; he's bald and probably weighs upward of 300 pounds. His nipples have large, spiked brass rings through them. He looks to be some form of hobgoblin, maybe with some ogre blood. His goblin ancestry is confirmed when he addresses you in Goblin, an age-old saying that roughly translates to "Whaddya want?"
Jaegr sees the goblin go into the building and shrugs continuing on his way, "I'm hungry and want to find a place indoors to drink." Jaegr continues on his way to the inn.
Caspian places a hand on Jaegr's shoulder....
"I bet tha one drinks his bath water! Let's find sometting better tah drink."
A few doors up the street is Jeblin's Public House, a well-kept brick building with a sign out front in Common and High Elvish, and a picture of a foaming ale mug next to a small wine glass. It seems to be crowded with well-dressed people.
"Let's try this out first before the docks. With Vanya here we'll fit right in."
A guy who looks to be about three-fourths elven is walking out of the place as you walk in; he's wearing an elaborate white outfit worked with thread-of-gold patterns in a stylized key motif. At his side is an almost ridiculously tiny rapier-like sword. The handle of Jaegr's pick twitches the guy's mantle as you walk by him; he turns sharply on his heel and snaps in Dwarven,
"What is he sayin?"
"I don't play, I finish. Move along"
To Caspian, "He wants to get us in trouble"
"Shall I warm up mah bag-pipes?"
With a twisted sneer, the elf-man drawls at Jaegr:
To Caspian "He's telling me that his weapon is much like another part he has"
Uncertainty creeps into his languid gaze, to be replaced with rage. Abandoning Dwarven, he says in Common, loudly enough for everyone around you to hear, "Ah, to set a duel and then renege... I assume it's legal to cut down such a one right here in the street?"
Controlling himself, he adds, more quietly as an aside to you, "I switched to Common because I recalled, belatedly, that apologizing is not possible in Dwaven. Given that courtesy, you could reply in kind and spare yourself some inconvenience."
A really big, incredibly ugly guy wearing nothing but a towel around his waist walks in and scowls at you. His face is yellow, with a huge blue nose and red rings under his eyes; his ears are floppy and semi-pointed; he's bald and probably weighs upward of 300 pounds. His nipples have large, spiked brass rings through them. He looks to be some form of hobgoblin, maybe with some ogre blood. His goblin ancestry is confirmed when he addresses you in Goblin, an age-old saying that roughly translates to "Whaddya want?"
Cricket turns to the elven lady and switches back to Common.
Thank you, my dear, that will do nicely.
To the hobgoblin, in Goblin,
Come, come, my dear boy, lead me to the sauna!
Jaegr frowns and tells the man, "Tomorrow at the Jarnell Forge then. You had your chance to back off, now you committed me."
Jaegr walks away from the man and orders a drink
"I guess you an Cricket both got dates already....iffen only I could find meself someone tah wile away tha time with."
Let's just say whatever he's after can be accommodated, but when they present him with the final bill, he'll be destined for debtor's prison.
Jaegr's drink at Jeblin's Public House costs him a mere 7 times as much as it should.
When presented with the bill, Cricket looks at it blankly.
What is the meaning of this? In the Tuelvi lands, love is free!
One of the masseuses is a scrawny, very bedraggled wood elf; she normally has to attend to the nastier customers. In wood elf, she whispers to Cricket:
With that, she pretends to trip and sloshes a large bucket of soapy water and massage oil all over the floor. When the big half-ogre goblin tries to grab Cricket, he is forced to make an Acrobatics check to avoid slipping:
Failing to meet the DC 20, he falls prone; the squaw pretends to trip over him, and tries to dump a basket of used towels on his head:
Her CMB check:
Her Bluff check:
She fails to tangle him in the towels, but appears to get away with the ruse.
Cricket finishes pulling up his pants, climbs up to a window and whistles for Wolvie.
In Wood Elf he says Thank you, Sister Blackbird!;
then in Goblin he says Thank you, Antonio, but next time, more vigor!
before jumping onto Wolvie's back!
"Zorro" must be the spanish word for "Cricket."
After a sit-down at the tavern....
"Wanted tha bath-house bandit!"
I like that. The Bath-House Bandit! So what are we doing here in town, huh? What happened to our merchant friends?
Your merchant friends are looking at the prices at Jeblin's Public House with something bordering on panic.
Cricket checks for his towel and turns to them:
Don't panic.
"Who is in a panic?"
"I might be if yous says you didn't get the release you were hard up for! I will defend my bag-pipes from your un-natural desires!"
Woah, little one. What is so un-natural about [censored! censored! censored!]? Anyway, I was referring to our good merchant friends, who seem to be looking at that funny piece of paper in alarm. You there, wench! More ale!
Wyvurn returns in much better spirits having eaten. Seeing the situation, he rolls his eyes.
"Caspian, give our merchant friends some coin so they may enjoy themselves. Jaegr, I overheard that little exchange, I would be honored to be your second. While I do not want to draw any more attention as necessary, perhaps demonstrating we will not be pushed around by boisterous fops may prover to our advantage."
"The problem is after you ave had mah pipes I would no longer want to put my mouth on this part ever again!"
"Rolling your eyes is un-attrative."
Caspian places his hat on the nerby table.....
throws one coin in and starts to play his pipes...
"I will earn some extra coin any second now!"
"I stopped being attractive the day I was born. Rolling my eyes is about the only expression I can do since my face was permanently burned into this sneer."
"Sorry I had assumed all hobgoblins shared similar appearance, did you know I have six nipples?"
No, I didn't! How fascinating! May I see?
And what is this about a duel?
Caspian open his shirt exposing the top tier of nipples and then raises his shirt to shoe the bottome tier at belly-button level.
"Not fer showing the middle set."
"Check yer wolf, sure its tha same."