Fun With Large Objects

[Belulzebub]

I am finally taking the 5E Barbarian for a test run, and with the 2nd rung of the Bear Totem and a caster kind enough to prepare Enlarge/Reduce regularly I can rock a carrying capacity of 600 lbs (1200 when enlarged) which gives me a Lift overhead of 1200/2400 lbs!

Now I am faced with a very important dilemma - what ridiculous common large objects should I use this ability on in combat? Some items that have occurred to me so far:

-Cannon ~1000 lbs(Ship/battlefield)
-Carriage ~600 lbs(Town square)
-Throne ~300-~1000 lbs(Dungeon/Castle)
-Grand Dining Table ~1200-~2400 lbs(Dungeon/Castle)

Yeah it's a fairly short list unfortunately. Which is why I am hoping some of the more creative and/or ridiculous posters here can drum up some ideas for Barbarian shenanigans.

[SmiloDan]

ANVILS ANVILS ANVILS

[Steve Geddes]

Defeated enemies?

[Lorathorn]

Boulders, trees, horses (see Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter).

[SmiloDan]

Don't see Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter.

;-)

Just throw horses.

In 3.5, our goliath ranger often carried the horses.

Memorably, once via tight(ish)rope over a raging river. (The river was a level 4 barbarian.)

There's an even worse movie about Abraham Lincoln, Zombie Slayer.

[Lorathorn]

I liked ALVH. I mean, it was cheesy, yes. But yeah, horse throwing.

[SmiloDan]

It did have excellent horse throwing.

[Sissyl]

Anchors. Altars.

[SmiloDan]

Altars dedicated to Anchors. Also meteorologists and the sports reporters.

[Threeshades]

For a moment I thought this was the same idea I have just finished planning out.

I saw how weapons for large and larger creatures work (for each category of size above medium you add an extra weapon damage die, creatures that are one size category too small can use the weapon with disadvantage)

And so I came up with a barbarian build using a large size greatsword:

Gatsu:

Human Barbarian/Fighter

Base stats
Str 15, Dex 13, Con 15, Int 9, Wis 8, Cha 11
+1 to all for human

Levels
1 Barbarian
2 Barbarian
3 Barbarian: Frenzied Berserker
4 Fighter: Great Weapon Style
5 Fighter
6 Fighter: Champion
7-20 Barbarian

Putting the ability score improvements only into Str and Con.

This character would have to use reckless attack all the time, to mitigate the disadvantage from his weapon.

At 12th level, to which I built the character out so far, he would crit on 19-20 and deal 12d6 + 7 damage, not the most optimal build probably but the average 48 damage crit on every 10th attack would be worth it.

[Lorathorn]

Crits seem to favor higher damage dice for sure.

Where did you see the rule on damage dice for larger weapons? Or was that an extrapolation from monster stat blocks?

[SmiloDan]

I think it's in the DMG.

I used that rule for my "Ogre with a Huge Flail" monster last week. And then cheated and gave the flail the versatile quality so it did 3d10 points of damage.