The Official "crazy, hilarious, annoying, and amazing stuff my cat does" thread

[Set]

Aranna wrote:

I don't know the gamer I refer to as "newbie" once lost six consecutive characters to cat attacks in game. To this very day his characters quake in fear at the sight of a big kitty. And he has become the target of numerous cat jokes. It is widely hypothesized that he must have been mean to kitties in a previous life and now suffers the curse of the kitties.

We had a guildie in EverQuest who seemed to have a lion-attracting aura. We'd sit down to meditate/recover between fights in the Karanas, and a lion would lope over and attack him specifically. Every time. His nickname, which he eventually chose as his characters surname, was 'Lionsnack.'

[GM_Beernorg]

FLUFFY JUSTICE!

[DM Mathpro]

We used to have a cat, until my parents took her, that was such a diva...she would growl and cherp at you if you picked her up and tried to pet her. She would also lock her arms and try to push away from you if she came over for pets and you picked her up to do it. It had to be on her terms and not to long otherwise she'd become displeased and you'd hear about it.

She was an EXCELLENT mouser however. At a previous house that my wife and I had she caught and mostly killed(at least broke all 4 legs) probably a dozen mice. One of which she was nice enough to leave in bed on my side of the bed with out warning me...I slept on it all night and I had mouse goo stuck to me in the morning...probably revenge for petting her.

[GM_Beernorg]

Cat mob, they leave dead mice in your bed, "Vinny Da' V is sleeping with the mice..."

[Krensky]

Apparently my ex-roommate's cat has developed a hatred for the raid bosses in the recent expansion for FFXIV. Every time he starts a pull the cat hisses, arches it's back, 'spits' at his monitor screen and then hides under the bed until the fights over.

[Ambrosia Slaad]

When our orange tabby needs a pill, I use half a slice of deli (honey) ham. I cut the half into two quarter slices, then wrap the pill tightly in one of the quarters. She is too picky to eat nearly all human food and she hates the pill-pocket treats, but for some unknown reason loves ham. So she'll inhale the first quarter, wrapped around the pill. I give her the second quarter as a reward for taking her pill.

To keep it special, I only give her a bit of ham for taking a pill or as an apology if I am away for overnight or longer. When she was little, she injured her paw and it got mildly infected. We gave her the antibiotic pill wrapped in ham as prescribed, and she healed fine. But when we stopped giving her the ham gifts, she started fake limping... on the wrong paw. She eventually figured out that wouldn't work and gave up. But every so often, she'll sit, watch me to make sure I'm watching her, then lift up one of her front paws.

[Neriathale]

Meluseth (or Ninjadeathkitty as she prefers to be described) is a ferocious hunter. We have got used to finding bits of rabbit in the kitchen, and rats under the coffee table.

One night she decided as a break from killing things to play with a pile of Magic cards that were lying on the lounge table. We came downstairs to discover the commoner cards scattered across the floor, and the single mythic rare chewed beyond playability. It can't be coincidence.