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I've wanted to make a smoke-themed NPC for quite a while. The basic idea was to make not a caster, but a melee character with a few magic effects based on smoke. I tried to build it using official ruels (e.g. a qinggong monk with gaseous form), but I never found myself satisfied, so I thought about the oracle and made an oracle mystery. I would like to know what you people think. Also, i've noticed that each mystery has usually ten revelations, but I've only come up with nine, so suggestions about a possible tenth would be great. Thanks!
P.S. Sorry for my bad english (I'm Italian)
Class Skills: Acrobatics, Escape Artist, Fly, Stealth
Bonus spells: 2nd-obscuring mist, 4th-pyrotechnics, 6th-ash storm, 8th-phantom steed, 10th-solid fog, 12th-wind walk, 14th-project image, 16th-incendiary cloud, 18th-crushing hand
Revelations
Choking Cloud (Su)(7th level required): Once per day, the oracle can create a cloud of thin ash in a 20ft radius around himself. This cloud does not reduce visibility. Other creatures in the area must make a Fortitude save or they will start coughing and fall prone. While coughing, creatures cannot take actions, but are not considered helpless. The effect lasts for up to 1 round per oracle level, but coughing creatures can attempt a new save throw at each round. At 11th and 15th level, the oracle can use this ability an additional time per day.
Cinder Dance (Ex): This is exactly the same of the Flame Mystery.
Fume Armor (Su): The oracle can manifest a shroud of black fumes around himself for 1 hour per class level, gaining a +4 armor bonus to AC. This bonus increases by +2 at 7th level, and every 4 levels thereafter. At 13th level, this effect grants 20% concealment. In conditions of strong wind or worse, the bonus armor decreases by 2.
Fume shape (Su)(11th level required): As a swift action, the oracle gains the incorporeal subtype for a number of rounds per day equal to half his class level. This duration can be divided in multiple uses per day.
Gaseous Form (Su): This is exactly the same of the Wind Mystery.
Obscuring Touch (Su): As a standard action, the oracle makes a melee touch attack that blinds the target for 1 round. At 11th level, the target is blinded for 1d4 rounds. the oracle can use this ability a numer of times per day equal to 3 + his Charisma modifier.
Resistent Lungs (Ex): The oracle can hold his breath for a number of rounds equal to 4 times his Constitution modifier, instead of 2 times. At 11th level, the oracle doesn't need to breathe anymore (inspired by Felgoroth's post).
Smokeshift (Su): As a move action, the oracle can teleport by up to 5ft per oracle level per day. This distance can be divided in multiple uses, but always using increments of 5ft. This ability does not provoke an attack of opportunity. The oracle cannot take other creatures along, and he needs line of sight to the destination.
Smoke Vision (Su): The oracle can see perfectly through smoke and ashes, both natural and magic. At 7th level, he can use a smoke source (such as a bonfire, a torch or a censer) as a Scrying device, as per the spell, for a number of rounds per day equal to his oracle level. At 15th level, this functions like Scrying, greater.
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Pretty good (I find little to no fault with your English, either).
I'd say you need more "restricted to high levels" Revelations.
Consider making its 4th-level bonus spell fire shield instead of phantom steed (although that works, too). I definitely think the 9th-level spell should be something different - without trying too hard, may I suggest shades?
Developer
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Class Skills: Acrobatics, Escape Artist, Fly, Stealth
It looks like you took the skills from the wind mystery, and three of these are great choices. Fly seems odd because the mystery doesn’t actually grant any means of flying.
Bonus spells: 2nd-obscuring mist, 4th-pyrotechnics, 6th-ash storm, 8th-phantom steed, 10th-solid fog, 12th-wind walk, 14th-project image, 16th-incendiary cloud, 18th-crushing hand
I like these. I can see all of these being smoke-themed, though I agree that the 18th-level addition could be something like shades.
Choking Cloud (Su)(7th level required): Once per day, the oracle can create a cloud of thin ash in a 20ft radius around himself. This cloud does not reduce visibility. Other creatures in the area must make a Fortitude save or they will start coughing and fall prone. While coughing, creatures cannot take actions, but are not considered helpless. The effect lasts for up to 1 round per oracle level, but coughing creatures can attempt a new save throw at each round. At 11th and 15th level, the oracle can use this ability an additional time per day.
This is powerful. You effectively have a fireball-sized zone that trips and dazes, and once a creature has been affected, it's doomed for the rest of the encounter. I would rather see it stagger those who fail, and maybe there’s a new save to throw off the effect each round (but a second failed save makes it worse, perhaps). This is also a tough effect to use because it harms one’s allies. Compare it some cleric 8th-level domain/subdomain abilities like Toil, Protean, and Madness.
Cinder Dance (Ex): This is exactly the same of the Flame Mystery.
A nice choice.
Fume Armor (Su): The oracle can manifest a shroud of black fumes around himself for 1 hour per class level, gaining a +4 armor bonus to AC. This bonus increases by +2 at 7th level, and every 4 levels thereafter. At 13th level, this effect grants 20% concealment. In conditions of strong wind or worse, the bonus armor decreases by 2.
I don’t really see smoke as being good at stopping blows, but the concealment aspect works nicely. I really like how it grants a lesser benefit in strong winds. Perhaps the armor increases the miss chance against the oracle by 5% if she is already benefiting from concealment, as this would gel nicely with the spell list.
Fume shape (Su)(11th level required): As a swift action, the oracle gains the incorporeal subtype for a number of rounds per day equal to half his class level. This duration can be divided in multiple uses per day.
This seems fine.
Gaseous Form (Su): This is exactly the same of the Wind Mystery.
Good. Very smoky.
Obscuring Touch (Su): As a standard action, the oracle makes a melee touch attack that blinds the target for 1 round. At 11th level, the target is blinded for 1d4 rounds. the oracle can use this ability a numer of times per day equal to 3 + his Charisma modifier.
Whoa, a 1st-level effect that blinds without a save and with no HD limit? That’s strong. I strongly recommend this obscure the target’s vision like the darkness cleric domain ability, then perhaps at a higher level (7th? 11th?) it can blind on a failed save.
Resistent Lungs (Ex): The oracle can hold his breath for a number of rounds equal to 4 times his Constitution modifier, instead of 2 times. At 11th level, the oracle doesn't need to breathe anymore (inspired by Felgoroth's post).
The 11th-level feature is what makes this revelation work.
Smokeshift (Su): As a move action, the oracle can teleport by up to 5ft per oracle level per day. This distance can be divided in multiple uses, but always using increments of 5ft. This ability does not provoke an attack of opportunity. The oracle cannot take other creatures along, and he needs line of sight to the destination.
At first this seemed like too little teleportation, but I see it’s a move action. It’s a nice ability, but I would rather see this allow for slightly more teleportation per day yet require that the start and end space have to be within fog, smoke, or a similar cloud-like area.
Smoke Vision (Su): The oracle can see perfectly through smoke and ashes, both natural and magic. At 7th level, he can use a smoke source (such as a bonfire, a torch or a censer) as a Scrying device, as per the spell, for a number of rounds per day equal to his oracle level. At 15th level, this functions like Scrying, greater.
Another great choice.
So…where’s your 20th-level capstone? Also, you should have a higher ratio of 7th-/11th-level revelations compared to the many 1st-level ones.
Thanks people!
Yes I considered the "shadow" spell tree for the bonus spells, and to replace the crushing hand i thought about "weird" too. I'll definitely think about something different for the last spell :)
This is powerful. You effectively have a fireball-sized zone that trips and dazes, and once a creature has been affected, it's doomed for the rest of the encounter. I would rather see it stagger those who fail, and maybe there’s a new save to throw off the effect each round (but a second failed save makes it worse, perhaps). This is also a tough effect to use because it harms one’s allies. Compare it some cleric 8th-level domain/subdomain abilities like Toil, Protean, and Madness.
Yes I imagined this reaction to the choking cloud XD I was just trying to do an AoE version of Hideous Laughter, but with coughs instead of laughs... I'll try to nerf it! By the way, if you read carefully, targets ARE allowed to take a new save throw each turn.
At first this seemed like too little teleportation, but I see it’s a move action. It’s a nice ability, but I would rather see this allow for slightly more teleportation per day yet require that the start and end space have to be within fog, smoke, or a similar cloud-like area.
The idea of teleporting between smoke effects is really cool, but I'm worried it would limit the utility aspect of this revelation. I mean, a shadowdancer can use shadowstep almost everywhere, but there are not many places full of smoke clouds or fog...
Whoa, a 1st-level effect that blinds without a save and with no HD limit? That’s strong. I strongly recommend this obscure the target’s vision like the darkness cleric domain ability, then perhaps at a higher level (7th? 11th?) it can blind on a failed save.
I totally forgot about the darkness domain power of the cleric, I'll definitely use that.
I noticed now that I didn't think about a final revelation XD I guess having never played beyond 15th level has made me indifferent to high-level abilities... I'll think about it and I'll update asap.
Thanks again everyone! Keep it on!
EDIT:
I will remove the Fly skill as well... I guess it's there as a remain of one of the first prototypes I wrote for this mystery
For the final revelation, I was thinking to something like this:
Final revelation: At 20th level, the orcale's body constantly shifts from solid to partially inconsistent. The oracle is always considered under the effect of Freedom of Movement as per the spell.
I have this cool Smoke Mystery I found on Necromancer's of the Northwest about a year ago. I used them for a PC once and they were a lot of fun.
http://www.necromancers-online.com/articles/BestInClass/2014/20140113.html
I have this cool Smoke Mystery I found on Necromancer's of the Northwest about a year ago. I used them for a PC once and they were a lot of fun.
http://www.necromancers-online.com/articles/BestInClass/2014/20140113.html
T his is awesome, thanks! I really love the mirror image and smoky exit revelations, and I see that the spell list is almost the same as mine.
So, let's see if this works better.
Class Skills: Acrobatics, Escape Artist, Perform (dance), Stealth
Bonus spells: 2nd-obscuring mist, 4th-pyrotechnics, 6th-ash storm, 8th-phantom steed, 10th-solid fog, 12th-wind walk, 14th-project image, 16th-incendiary cloud, 18th-etherealness
Revelations
Choking Cloud (Su)(7th level required): Once per day, the oracle can create a cloud of thin ash in a 20ft radius around himself. This cloud does not reduce visibility. Other creatures in the area must make a Fortitude save or they will be start coughing and be staggered for 1d4 rounds. The cloud dissipates after 1 round. The oracle can use this ability an additional time per day at 11th and 15th level.
Cinder Dance (Ex): This is exactly the same of the Flame Mystery.
Fume Armor (Su): The oracle can manifest a shroud of black fumes around himself for 1 hour per class level, gaining a +4 armor bonus to AC. This bonus increases by +2 at 7th level, and every 4 levels thereafter. At 13th level, this effect grants 20% concealment. In conditions of strong wind or worse, the armor bonus decreases by 2.
Fume shape (Su)(11th level required): As a swift action, the oracle gains the incorporeal subtype for a number of rounds per day equal to half his class level. This duration can be divided in multiple uses per day.
Gaseous Form (Su) (7th level required): This is exactly the same of the Wind Mystery.
Obscuring Touch (Su): As a standard action, the oracle makes a melee touch attack that causes smoke to hamper the target's sight. The target will treat all other chreatures as if they have 20% concealment. The effect lasts for a number of rounds equal to half the oracle's level. the oracle can use this ability a numer of times per day equal to 3 + his Charisma modifier.
Resistent Lungs (Ex): The oracle can hold his breath for a number of rounds equal to 4 times his Constitution modifier, instead of 2 times. At 11th level, the oracle doesn't need to breathe anymore (inspired by Felgoroth's post).
Smokeshift (Su) (7th level required): As a move action, the oracle can teleport by up to 10ft per oracle level per day. This distance can be divided in multiple uses, but always using increments of 10ft. This ability does not provoke an attack of opportunity. The oracle cannot take other creatures along, and he needs line of sight to the destination. The oracle cannot use this ability in conditions of strong winds or worse.
Smoke Vision (Su): The oracle can see perfectly through smoke and ashes, both natural and magic. At 7th level, he can use a smoke source (such as a bonfire, a torch or a censer) as a Scrying device, as per the spell, for a number of rounds per day equal to his oracle level. At 15th level, this functions like Scrying, greater.
Smoky clones (3rd level required) (Sp): The oracle can create a number of smoky clones of himself. This duplicates the mirror image spell effect, but the illusory clones vanish after 1 round in conditions of strong winds or worse.
Final Revelation: At 20th level, the oracle's body shifts constantly from solid to inconsistent. The oracle is always considered under the effect of blur and freedom of movement as per the spells.
I like it! Feels like I could build Smoke from MK with this. Which is awesome, cause he is my favorite character.