The Great Pathfinder Rules Mistranslation Riddle Challenge

[davidvs]

In another thread Kobold Cleaver and Mordo the Spaz started something with great potential.

Let's obfuscate Pathfinder language with synonyms and homonyms to make riddles!

Please allow me to analyze Mordo's examples.

Quote:

His best:

Me wizard toss magic effect against enemy consent rescue.

my analysis:

This is quite pure homonym/synonym use.
My wizard casts a spell against the enemy will save.
cast became the synonym toss
spell became magic effect
will became a somewhat forced synonym consent (as in, "Yes I will/consent")
save became the synonym rescue.

---

Also nice:

Me paladin recline on fingers as brief activity to mediate problem with self.

my analysis:

My paladin lays on hands as a swift action to heal itself.
lays became reclines
hand became a slightly imprecise fingers
swift action became the synonym brief activity
heal became the synonym mediate (as in "their disagreement would never be healed").

---

His sloppiest:

Me cleric offers gift of sacred percussion discs to cause water flow between two larger bodies of water.

my analysis:

An intermediate rephrasing step muddles this one.
Start with My cleric presents his holy symbol to channel energy.
Rephrase inaccurately as My cleric presents his holy symbol to energize the channel.
Then
present became offers gift
holy became sacred
symbol became the homonym cymbal (a percussion disc)
energize the channel became cause water to flow {through a channel} between two larger bodies of water.

Okay. One of my own before it is your turn to contribute...

The druids feral condition as an appalling pestering and an exceptional endure.

Spoiler:

The druids wild shape as a dire badger and a giant bear.
wild -> feral
shape -> condition
dire -> apalling
badger (animal) -> badger (behavior) -> pester
giant -> exceptional (as in "a giant among baseball players")
bear (animal) -> bear (verb) -> endure

Your turn to make some fun mistranslation riddles!

[Lincoln Hills]

GM: You observe abominations! Rotate for assertiveness!
Rogue: Is this unnatural creature servant to filch infringement?
Fighter: I restore battery level!
Cleric: I make a correct lettering of recovery from injury!
Bard: I guide creatively overcoming fear!

[davidvs]

The virtuoso radiates deadened appalling comprehension with a subordinate elevation mean window.

Spoiler:

The wizard casts silenced shocking grasp with a second level spell slot.
wizard -> virtuoso (as in "a guitar wizard")
casts -> radiates (as in "the moon casts a pale light")
silenced -> deadened
shocking -> appalling
grasp -> comprehension (as in "he has a grasp of the truth")
second -> subordinate
level -> elevation
spell -> mean (as in "that would spell disaster for our plans")
slot -> window (as in "a short time slot")

Lincoln Hills, the Fighter's sentence still puzzles me. Is it I reinstate attack position?

[Whack-a-Rogue]

I think Lincoln Hills' Fighter just Power Attacked.

The boor initiates a current, eagerly accepted fashion and postpones payment on a debt.

Spoiler:

The barbarian starts rage and charges.

[KatsuneSage]

Here is my crack at it.

The diviner hires actors to make the agents of a rival troupe stop in their tracks.

Spoiler:

The druid casts entanglement on the oncoming enemies.

[Davor]

We need this guy here.

Suave Gentleman

[Whack-a-Rogue]

The haughty disregard printed periodicals a difficult task and cowboy footwear his ornamental metal piece attached to furniture number after three a carried off mysteriously pierce expense

Spoiler:

The cavalier issues a challenge and spurs his mount for a spirited lance charge.

[KatsuneSage]

With the proviso shouting golfer the animal meat king tumbling in natural pairs of multiple tens, Solitary sooth-sayer tree own and prospered.

Spoiler:

If it weren't for the GM rolling a nat 20, the bard would've survived.

[Chemlak]

Whack-a-Rogue wrote:

I think Lincoln Hills' Fighter just Power Attacked.

Nah, he charged. Made me giggle.