Time for the Tomb of Borrors!

[Schism]

*humpf
Wizards, always so full of themselves.

[Aduro, Good Wizard of Avantia]

*Despite the derro's hurtful words, casts a spell that will allow her to automatically pass all evasive checks.*

I hope that this helps, also, I have a couple of gifts for you.

*Gives Schism a mithril vest (masterwork/exotic, lightweight, acts like platemail) and a masterwork shortsword blessed with a fortune spell (so long as Schism has the sword, she may either reroll a bad result or half the CR for herself only, either way something good will also happen).*

[The Nasty Orc]

Wait .... lots of monsters in the way? So ... that means lots of stuff to eat right?" "OH GOODIE, GOODIE, GOODIE . NASTY ORC SO HAPPY RIGHT NOW. LETS GOOOOOO !!!!!!!!!" He says jumping up and down like a 5 year old on Christmas morning.

[Schism]

I thought you would be more like a kid in a candy store?
Learned something new - Nasty likes presents.

[Aduro, Good Wizard of Avantia]

I'm afraid that they would eat you, Nasty, but you would certainly be difficult to digest. All the same, here's a little something to help you.

*Gives The Nasty Orc a silver pendant necklace studded with a lapis lazuli in the centre that (so long as the orc wears the necklace) it will release an odor that only the beasts of Malvel can detect, thus acting as a repellent. Also, it will magically create sandwiches for him to eat.*

[Samuel Walker]

I examine the broken dagger.

Perception: 1d20 + 22 ⇒ (2) + 22 = 24

Also, is there any way out of this room other than back up?

[Claw, the Giant Monkey]

*Breaks down the wall furthest away from the heroes, snarls menacingly and then flees back the way he came and disappears before anyone can react.*

[Samuel Walker]

Well, I guess we're going after that monkey next, if there are no objections.

Nothing unusual about the broken dagger then?

[Tvashtri Abdul-Khasis]

"My word! Such a turn of events! Have I truly been unconscious for so long that the prophecied Age of Djinn and Spirits is upon us???"

[Aduro, Good Wizard of Avantia]

No,that event is not to come for another five nonillion years from now (even then, it doesn't happen until you try to get up in the morning and let out a most disgusting fart - if you'll pardon me for saying that word - only to fall back onto your bed and die)!

Oh and mister Walker (may I call you Samuel, please?), I can tell you that: *you notice that the dagger's blade (despite being broken) still retains its glittering shine and the hilt has the image of some sort of animal's skull with a green jewel set into it.*

Wait a minute! That's the fabled Dagger of Doom! Though this is the first time I have actually seen it, I know all about it. The people of Gorgonia crafted this weapon from a special type of magical metal to protect their realm from Malvel's evil. I can only assume that it is a mixed blessing that the rebels may have lost the dagger, but at least the tyrant they sought to overthrow can no longer trouble them.

[JRR Tolkien]

What in the name of bilbo baggins is going on here, I have a 50th level character and a monkey... Oh my and good old abe lincoln

[Aduro, Good Wizard of Avantia]

*Bows to JRR Tolkien.*

Pray forgive me, old friend, I sensed that our brave heroes were in danger and had to help. However, I can only do so much (see my previous posts for better understanding). As for the monkey, he is one of a vast array of beasts under the command of an enemy of mine.

*Straightens up.*

As for Abe Lincoln, we shall have to see how "good" he truly is (in whatever way), because he's most certainly not old (compared to you and I that is).

[Schism]

Thank you.
Kill The Monkey

[Malvel, The Dark Wizard]

*A voice, full of malice, reverberates around the room.*

"Oh, you'll need to do more than that! Even if you destroy all of my beasts, I'll just restore them! And I have many 'surprises' in store for you all, dare you continue? Oh, I almost forgot, here's a something to 'entertain' you!"

*The voice starts laughing a most vile and cruel laugh. As it fades away, a new sound is heard (angry roars and the pace of fast movement) heading straight for the heroes. Suddenly, the source of the noises comes into view: six large and hungry looking, hyena-like creatures with spotted fur and a pair of overly large tusks in each of their salivating jaws, stand at the hole in the wall. Growling menacingly, ready to to attack.*

[Aduro, Good Wizard of Avantia]

*Face pales in horror.*

Oh no, varkules! Quick everyone, be ready to defend yourselves!

*Unsheathes a magnificently crafted, one handed, sword as the varkules slowly advance with more appearing behind them. The evil glimmers in their eyes shining brightly.*

[The Nasty Orc]

"Oh goodie food has arrived." Looking at Schism. "Am I allowed to eat them? Right, " without waiting for an answer. . "nobody will notice one of them missing.

His prehensile tongue lashes out wrapping around one of the hyena type creatures and pulls it quickly back into his mouth in a flash and there there were only five hyena creatures. As he gobbles down the creature it tries to fight but these things are no Midgard serpent and the fighting is futile. Everyone can see the hyena pushing at his belly as it is slowly digested. Nasty then takes his club out ready for a fight now that he has a large meal already in his belly.

[Schism]

Careful, I hear Malvel uses alum for flea powder.
That stuff will shrink your mouth, tongue and stomach.

[Aduro, Good Wizard of Avantia]

You are correct, Schism, for it was I who told you. Now concentrate and... Look out!

*A varkule lunges at Schism, but she easily dodges it thanks to the spell cast on her by Aduro earlier.*

No time to think, quickly now, attack!

*The battle is against six varkules. Each hero fights two of them, while an extra four varkules are fighting Aduro. Also, any new hero (including JRR Tolkien) will fight one extra varkule.*

[Samuel Walker]

I invoke the divine judgments of Justice and Destruction (+2 sacred bonus on attack rolls and +3 sacred bonus on weapon damage rolls), take a five-foot step away from the creatures, and fire a volley at the nearest one from my repeating crossbow.

+2 keen shock heavy repeating crossbow, first attack: 1d20 + 9 + 2 ⇒ (9) + 9 + 2 = 20
Second attack (Rapid Shot): 1d20 + 9 + 2 ⇒ (13) + 9 + 2 = 24
Third attack: 1d20 + 4 + 2 ⇒ (18) + 4 + 2 = 24 Confirmation roll: 1d20 + 4 + 2 ⇒ (15) + 4 + 2 = 21

First attack damage: 1d10 + 2 + 3 ⇒ (4) + 2 + 3 = 9 plus Electricity damage: 1d6 ⇒ 6

Second attack damage: 1d10 + 2 + 3 ⇒ (2) + 2 + 3 = 7 plus Electricity damage: 1d6 ⇒ 6

Third attack damage: 1d10 + 2 + 3 ⇒ (6) + 2 + 3 = 11 plus Third attack critical hit damage, if a 21 confirms: 1d10 + 2 + 3 ⇒ (7) + 2 + 3 = 12 plus Electricity damage: 1d6 ⇒ 6

(Also, what knowledge skill would these guys fall under?)

[Aduro, Good Wizard of Avantia]

*Stabs a nearby varkule in the leg, causing it to stagger about.*

Ah yes, varkules would be both nature and arcana checks as they were bred by evil people before going extinct. Just remember, they resemble dire hyenas (with a more damaging bite attack) but are much more intelligent.

[Samuel Walker]

Nope, not trained in either of those. How many of my attacks actually hit, by the way?

[Aduro, Good Wizard of Avantia]

*Cleaves the head of one of the varkules right off it's shoulders.*

Surprisingly, all three hit. But the last one went into the second varkule you are attacking. While the first one is having a fit as it tries to fight off the effects of the electricity.

[AM HEALER]

JRR Tolkien wrote:

Seems late to get that ability, I would have guessed that came online at first level

Remember, I used to worship Healy. Then I switched to Bashy because that dude knows how to party.

Wait, are we bashing things right now?

bashbash: 1d20 + 11 ⇒ (5) + 11 = 16
bash?: 1d8 + 8 + 3d6 + 9 ⇒ (5) + 8 + (5, 2, 4) + 9 = 33

[Aduro, Good Wizard of Avantia]

*Kills another varkule as yet two more leap up in attack.*

Well done, AM HEALER, you've successfully the first varkule attacking you and you've also killed the second one attacking you. I hope that the others are fairing just as well.

[Schism]

*Moves into flank
First Attack: 1d20 + 15 ⇒ (17) + 15 = 32
First Damage: 1d6 + 3 ⇒ (3) + 3 = 6
First Sneak Attack Damage: 4d6 ⇒ (3, 2, 4, 2) = 11
Second Attack: 1d20 + 15 ⇒ (6) + 15 = 21
Second Damage: 1d6 + 3 ⇒ (3) + 3 = 6
Second Sneak Attack Damage: 4d6 ⇒ (3, 2, 6, 6) = 17
Third Attack: 1d20 + 15 ⇒ (18) + 15 = 33
Third Damage: 1d6 + 3 ⇒ (3) + 3 = 6
Third Sneak Attack Damage: 4d6 ⇒ (6, 2, 4, 5) = 17

[Aduro, Good Wizard of Avantia]

Marvelous work, Schism, those varkules don't stand a chance against you and look!

*Points to the first varkule attacking Schism which is now bleeding from its wounds and the blood is turning into gold coins just for Schism to use, while the second one (who isn't injured) is backing away confused and horrified.*

That sword I gave you is really coming in handy!

[Bard, James Bard agent 001E]

That's raht baby, i'm back! Now who wants haggis

[Malvel, The Dark Wizard]

*A varkule lunges at James Bard,bowls him over and devours his flesh. Then, an evil voice calls out.*

"So much for agent 001E! Guess you'll have to look elsewhere for haggis, perhaps my minions will turn you into some!"

*The voice then laughs manically as it fades.*

[Samuel Walker]

Well then.

I take another five foot step back, and empty the rest of the magazine into the creature that attacked James.

First attack: 1d20 + 11 + 2 ⇒ (3) + 11 + 2 = 16

Second attack: 1d20 + 6 + 2 ⇒ (20) + 6 + 2 = 28, Second attack confirmation roll: 1d20 + 6 + 2 ⇒ (13) + 6 + 2 = 21

First attack damage: 1d10 + 2 + 3 ⇒ (8) + 2 + 3 = 13 plus Electricity damage: 1d6 ⇒ 4

Second attack damage: 1d10 + 2 + 3 ⇒ (8) + 2 + 3 = 13 plus Second attack critical hit damage, if a 21 confirms: 1d10 + 2 + 3 ⇒ (4) + 2 + 3 = 9 plus Electricity damage: 1d6 ⇒ 4

[Schism]

Gold Coins: 5d20 + 5d20 + 5d20 ⇒ (6, 18, 19, 15, 19) + (5, 10, 8, 7, 12) + (13, 17, 17, 4, 5) = 175

[Aduro, Good Wizard of Avantia]

*Slays yet another varkule.*

These things are relentless! Still, at least they are easy to kill and Schism is now extremely wealthy.

[Schism]

How many left, I lost count?

Fourth Attack: 1d20 + 15 ⇒ (11) + 15 = 26
Fourth Damage: 1d6 + 3 ⇒ (5) + 3 = 8
Fourth Sneak Attack Damage: 4d6 ⇒ (4, 5, 6, 1) = 16
Fifth Attack: 1d20 + 15 ⇒ (12) + 15 = 27
Fifth Damage: 1d6 + 3 ⇒ (1) + 3 = 4
Fifth Sneak Attack Damage: 4d6 ⇒ (1, 6, 1, 1) = 9
Sixth Attack: 1d20 + 15 ⇒ (11) + 15 = 26
Sixth Damage: 1d6 + 3 ⇒ (1) + 3 = 4
Sixth Sneak Attack Damage: 4d6 ⇒ (5, 5, 2, 6) = 18

[Bard, James Bard agent 001E]

A mere fleshwound....I cast meatier swarm at the thingermebobbers

Haggis Spew: 40d4 + 40 ⇒ (3, 4, 4, 3, 2, 1, 4, 2, 3, 4, 3, 3, 2, 2, 3, 1, 4, 1, 2, 4, 1, 3, 1, 1, 1, 3, 3, 1, 1, 4, 2, 2, 4, 2, 4, 4, 3, 1, 4, 3) + 40 = 143

[Aduro, Good Wizard of Avantia]

*Sees Schism kill a varkule while the rest enjoy eating James Bard's Haggis Spew.*

Absolutely revolting! Also, I believe that was the initial six varkules that we had to worry about. So...

*Casts a spell that sends a shimmering golden light throughout the entire room (and making everyone, expect Aduro, shield their eyes), engulfing the varkules and turning them into dust. As the spell disapates and the light fades away, gives an exhausted sigh of relief.*

I wish I did that earlier, no matter, let's go!

*Leads the group through the hole in the wall and into the unknown.*

[Samuel Walker]

I pocket the dagger and swap out the empty magazine for a new one before following the wizard, casting a sift spell as I follow him into the next room.

What do I see?

Perception: 1d20 + 22 ⇒ (14) + 22 = 36

[Aduro, Good Wizard of Avantia]

*Striding along, with a grace not usually seen in one so old, sword at the ready.*

It appears to be a natural cavern, save for the touches that have been set into the walls, as the network of tunnels is covered in a large amount of green foliage from ferns to mushrooms.

*Whilst everyone is keeping an eye out for danger, Samuel Walker notices two odd things: a faint light is following from neighbouring tunnels and there are large hoof-like footprints that abruptly end at a large boulder.*

[Schism]

Let me see!
Let me see!

[Aduro, Good Wizard of Avantia]

*Make a perception check, Schism.*

I sense great evil nearby, but I just can't tell where it is.

*Stands still, closes eyes and focuses.*

We are not dealing with Malvel's normal beasts, but rather his elite ones. There's at least two of them here.

*Opens eyes and looks around again.*

[Samuel Walker]

I cast see invisibility.

[Aduro, Good Wizard of Avantia]

*Nothing is revealed (in terms of any beasts) what is discovered however, is just as shocking.*

*On the walls are shadows belonging to both people and varkules, but rather than attacking, the shadows head away from the heroes (presumably to warn Malvel) and it is obvious that the shadows were not attached to any bodies.*

*What is also seen is: old, rotting, wooden signs dotted here and there with faded writing on them. The ones that are the least damaged, thus readable, all say to 'Keep Out!' or 'Danger!'*

Are you alright Samuel? Your face has gone pale, what's wrong?

*Sinister laughing can be heard, but it's very faint.*

[Schism]

Let Me See!: 1d20 + 13 ⇒ (10) + 13 = 23

[Aduro, Good Wizard of Avantia]

*You notice the boulder rocks about ever so slightly and there are large, birdlike footprints nearby.*

[The Nasty Orc]

"What are we looking at?" "I am hungry. Those doggies didn't taste too good and my tongue swelled up ... but it's better now."

[Aduro, Good Wizard of Avantia]

*If the orc is wearing the necklace that Aduro gave him, then a sandwich will magically appear.*

Remember, that necklace will always help you with your neverending apatite, so long as you wear it.

*The sinister laughing can be heard again. It's still faint but a more louder and clearer than before.*

Honestly, I don't know what troubles me more, that there are enemies nearby or that they haven't attacked yet.

[The Nasty Orc]

"Necklace? I don't remember getting a a necklace ... Schism did I get a necklace? Maybe I ate it?"

[Aduro, Good Wizard of Avantia]

I'm sorry to say this, but if you have eaten the necklace, that is your problem.

*Treads forwards, past the boulder (which seems to be shifting a little bit more now).*

Come on, the tomb seems to continue for another mile or so, we have to hurry!

[Schism]

The Nasty Orc wrote:

"Necklace? I don't remember getting a a necklace ... Schism did I get a necklace? Maybe I ate it?"

No, you gave me the monster repelling necklace because you didn't want to risk a snack running away from you.

[Aduro, Good Wizard of Avantia]

That explains why he wasn't getting any sandwiches, the necklace only works for him.

*Descends down into the tomb a bit further, with everyone else being close by.*

I'm not waiting for any of Malvel's beasts to attack, if we hurry, maybe we can avoid...

*Gets interrupted as the stone floor of the main tunnel gives way and crumbles down into a dark pit below. Takes a few steps back to catch some much needed breath.*

Phew! That was too close! Come on, we'll have to take one of the secondary tunnels!

*Begins to go the nearest tunnel, weapons at the ready with anticipation.*

Now we really need to be careful. One false move and...

*A mighty bellow is heard from where everyone was not two moments ago. Everyone turns around and sees that the boulder now stands on four elephantine legs and it turns around to face the heroes as a monstrous head appears from within the body. The revealed creature vaguely resembles a rhinoceros, but is three times bigger. On its head are two pairs of tiny, curved horns on the sides of its face (one pair at the top, in front of the ears and the other pair are lower down near the cheeks) and a large, curved horn on the tip of its nose (this horn is lightly coated with a sickly looking purple liquid).*

Klaxa the Amoured Enemy! One of Malvel's elite beasts! How could I forget that she can retract her head and legs into her body like a tortoise?! Watch out for her central horn, it's coated in a life threatening, magical poison!

*With another bellow, Klaxa lowers her head and charges towards the group! Fortunately, everyone leaps out of the way and Klaxa heads down one of the tunnels, disappearing behind a corner.*

Onwards everyone, it would be best to get out of these tunnels post haste!

[Tvashtri Abdul-Khasis]

Heeding the great (or at least good) wizard's advice Tvashtri gathers up his mechanicals and hoofs it at astounding speed!

"Say, O Great (or at least Good) Wizard, I hope it does not offend if I inquire...what I mean to say, is...if it pleases thee...perhaps...having seen, of course, thy tangible benefice toward the Orc and Schism, then perhaps...lest it reflect poorly on me to be so very forward...ah, hast thou any gifts suitable for one such as I?"