Crying neighbor

[secher_nbiw]

Hi friends. This is kind of off-off topic, but I found this to be odd, and wonder if I should have done something.

This afternoon, I heard my neighbor crying. My wife and I live in a duplex that was built in the early 1990s, and sound can really go through the shared wall. I was sitting on the couch, switching between the xbox and the tv, and I heard her.

It was not just crying; it sounded like she was sobbing. For a few minutes at least, and then she stopped. Or she moved away from the shared wall.

So, I guess, I have been asking myself if I should have gone over to ask if she was alright. Would that have been inappropriate? Creepy?

Thanks

[shadowmage75]

It's never too late to be sympathetic.

[Sissyl]

It would not have been creepy per se if you asked if she was okay. What it might have done is make her feel exposed in that you heard her sobbing when she expected to be in private. Sadly, most people today do not have any sort of relationship to their neighbours, indeed most don't even know their names.

[Klaus van der Kroft]

In my experience, it is better to ask and run the risk of being told to leave than never to ask.

I had a very similar experience around 2005. I was staying in a resort in Aruba, when I started hearing crying from the room next door. Few moments later, the crying got louder. So I went there, knocked on the door to see if everything was alright, and then a woman opens up, her face clearly the recent recipient of several hits.

Both she and the husband tried to play it cool, but when the woman started sobbing again while we were talking, the guy tried to hit her again. I got in the middle and got the punch in the shoulder, pretty hard by the way, so imagine what would have done to her face (where I think it was aimed). I managed to calm the guy down after that (though he seemed to be about to try and hit her again all the time. I myself wanted to punch the man hard, but I somehow managed to keep it cool) and called the resort management, who generously gave the woman a new room and custody, and called the local authorities to handle the man.

So worst case scenario, the neighbour calls you out for snooping. But that's preferable to the potentially worst case scenario on the neighbour's side.

[DJEternalDarkness]

+1 to what Klaus said. Sometimes being a good human means that you have to do something that seems little odd.

[Sissyl]

Agreed.

[Terquem]

Being told it is none of your business, and to go away, hurts, but you understand where the hurt is coming from, and forgiveness is natural.

Wondering if you did the right thing is internalizing, and self doubt, not always an easy thing to get over.

[Matthew Morris]

Agreed. Better to be a creeper than live with seeing the neighbor wheeled out in a gurney.

[secher_nbiw]

Thanks everyone for taking the time to respond.

I am kicking myself a little for not going over there, maybe under the guise of borrowing sugar or eggs to spare her the knowing that I could overhear her.

I see her on occasion, at the mailbox or going to her car and such, and will keep an eye on her, and my ears open. If I hear it again, I'm going over.

Thanks
SN