You can have a total modified enhancement bonus of +10, and must have at least a +1 weapon to put any special abilities on it. Therefore, you can have up to +9 worth of special abilities so long as you are willing to give up the increased enhancement bonus.
Should be by the rules, though a Flaming Frost weapon is a little weird, and some DMs might not like that.
and it's also a standard action to activate each ability unless they activate all with one command word.
While it's a command word to activate or deactivate a weapon like a flaming or a frost weapon... once activated it stays on. Sheathing it suppresses the energy automatically, and when you draw the weapon later it's ready to go. You'd only want to turn off the energy effect, as a previous poster said, when you're facing something that using that type of energy against is a bad idea.
flaming arrows stay activated. You can activate them on day 1 when you identify them and then stash them in a quiver, and then on day 24 when you finally use them, they're still burning. They only deal fire damage when they hit.
The rules for activating and unactivating a weapon's energy damage is not in the game to force users of those weapons to spend an extra action to get ready above the action of drawing a weapon. The rules are mostly there for the cases where you want to turn OFF the effect, such as if you're entering an encounter where having visibly magic weapons might be a disadvantage.
Otherwise, the game assumes that the energy damage effect is left on all the time. It's not like those weapons will run out of power if they're left on all the time, after all.
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Bane does not need to be activated. It is always on. And while elemental weapons do need to be activated you can leave them on indefinitely. They does not have the wielder. Thus it only comes up if you need to turn off the element for some reason. Such as a creature who is healed by fire.
Edit: Super Ninja'd by Grick. Thanks Grick!