Whoops lobs the B3 can in a lobbing arc, Sam seems to be tracking in on the can as the computer comes over the speaker
Sam seems to cringe slightly as the computer, at the same moment, Tataz tosses her can and hits Sam's throwing arm, causing the laser to fire, it refracts off the wall and pierces Whatt in the eyeball (Just as he's taking out a note pad to jot something down), Whatt collapses in a heap, The frenetic Chuckles then hits Sam's arm causing another shot to pierce Tataz refrac armor and pass thru her right can. The pain is excruciating.
Liam:
Sam:
SAM:
Chuckles
Tataz
Whatt
"Oh, this is the worst accident I have ever recorded! Oh, the humanity!" Liam zooms in on Tataz... wound for several seconds longer than necessary then rushes over to Sam and points the camera at his face. "Sam-R-SPD, what do you have to say about this greivious accident?"
GM:
Whatt starts to say "I don't think that..."
and follows it quickly up with "Aaaaaarrrrrgh!"
Then falls on the floor.
Another can of B3 hits the LZ
"Thank you Whatt-R-BTL "Your ME Card has been charged 89 credits."
another B3 drops into the LZ
"Thank you Whatt-R-BTL, your ME Card has been charged 144 credits" This one rolls out of the LZ as it get's stuck on another B3 can and rolls over to Whatt's lifeless form...
another B3 drops into the LZ
"Thank you Whatt-R-BTL, Your ME Card has been charged 144 credits, your ME Card is now showing negative credits, purchase of B3 beyond your credit has been noted and forwarded to Internal Security...thank you have a nice day."
LIAM:
Sam shrieks.
This is terrible! Tataz are you okay? This is a most tragic accident. I offer my most sincere apologies to all team members. If that can hadn't hit my firing arm none of this would have happened. Clearly Whoops made a poor throw. The can is supposed to lob nicely in the air not hit me in the arm. Fortunately, due the wonders of life in Alpha Complex, Whatt will be returned to us in the form of a new and more perfect clone, and he will once again be able to assume his duties as our Loyalty Officer. Unfortunately, we are running late. I am sure that Whatt's new clone will be delivered to R&D. Let's move out!
Sam turns and starts hurrying towards R&D
GM
Sam shrieks.
This is terrible! Tataz are you okay? This is a most tragic accident. I offer my most sincere apologies to all team members. If that can hadn't hit my firing arm none of this would have happened. Clearly Whoops made a poor throw. The can is supposed to lob nicely in the air not hit me in the arm. Fortunately, due the wonders of life in Alpha Complex, Whatt will be returned to us in the form of a new and more perfect clone, and he will once again be able to assume his duties as our Loyalty Officer. Unfortunately, we are running late. I am sure that Whatt's new clone will be delivered to R&D. Let's move out!
Sam turns and starts hurrying towards R&D
GM ** spoiler omitted **
" Dear citizen obviously your eyesight must be impaired, Because it was TATAZ that hit you with that can. I lobbed mine as Gracefully as well wishes from The Computer flow through the data stream. As the teams Equipment Guy I am going to have to ask you to surrender all barrels for your weapon until your eyesight has been thoroughly checked out by a qualified citizen. Pursuant to Equipment Guy duties and obligations field manual Chapter 4-b3, subsection 214430, addendum X4, subclause2. Yup, Yup!" WHOOPS skipps back to the team leader holding out his hand.
"oh I know when we get to R&D I will request some Visual Observational enhancers just for you! Team Leader!" WHOOPS looks at TATAZ "Are you going to be able to make it to R&D TATAZ? Chuckles you got anything for dear old TATAZ here. Surely after being shot she could use a boost to the old happy meter!!" WHOOPS smile's widely still holding out his hand for those barrels.
Tataz
Clearly the laster barrels work fine, so instead I think I'll just put them in my troubleshooter bag for now. Of course if the laser had not worked I would happily have turned it over to you for an inspection. When we get to R&D we'll see about that eye test. I'd hate think my vision was impaired. As team leader, it is my duty to be able to protect the team from dangerous commies and it wouldn't do for me not have a weapon.
Sam detaches his barrel and puts it in his bag, and then keeps jogging towards R&D.
Whoops I think that when we get to R&D you should make Tataz take off her jumpsuit for inspection. It should likely have provided her with more protection and it must have malfunctioned.
WHOOPS jumps back aghast pointing accusingly at SAM once he has removed and put away his barrel. "Refusing to comply with a legitimate request from your Equipment Guy. So your treasonous ways show no bounds eh SAM? Somebody blast this Commie Traitor!!" WHOOPS looks to his fellow troubleshooters "Don't you see what is happening? SAM here is a COMMIE TRAITOR!! He despises The Computer, and its authority. He just killed the Computers Loyalty Officer, TATAZ our Heroic HO saw what was going on she tried to save WHATT. She smacked SAM with her can. What did She get from our team leader? Blasted That's What! I mean he obviously is trying to sink this mission before it even begins. SAM is a Commie Traitor!" WHOOPS is hopping up and down looking for Support from his fellows. he runs over to CHUCKLES " I Mean a real team leader would have had us at R&D when first requested, but instead he's ordering me to toss cans of B3 in the air so he has an excuse to blast people, and say it was an accident. He doesn't want us to get to R&D, and get all those glorious things The Computer has provided us to go kill his COMMIE TRAITOR COMRADES!!! Do you guys even know what happened to your first Equipment Guy? I bet SAM does HE HAD HIS BADGE!" WHOOPS jumps up and down pointing at the badge pinned to his chest that SAM gave him. "The only chance we have for mission success is to take out SAM-R-SPD1 because he has been compromised by Commie propaganda. We can only hope that his brother clone SAM-R-SPD2 is untainted by such treachery. SOMEONE CYCLE THIS COMMIE SCUM!!"
WHOOPS jumps back aghast pointing accusingly at SAM once he has removed and put away his barrel. "Refusing to comply with a legitimate request from your Equipment Guy. So your treasonous ways show no bounds eh SAM? Somebody blast this Commie Traitor!!" WHOOPS looks to his fellow troubleshooters "Don't you see what is happening? SAM here is a COMMIE TRAITOR!! He despises The Computer, and its authority. He just killed the Computers Loyalty Officer, TATAZ our Heroic HO saw what was going on she tried to save WHATT. She smacked SAM with her can. What did She get from our team leader? Blasted That's What! I mean he obviously is trying to sink this mission before it even begins. SAM is a Commie Traitor!" WHOOPS is hopping up and down looking for Support from his fellows. he runs over to CHUCKLES " I Mean a real team leader would have had us at R&D when first requested, but instead he's ordering me to toss cans of B3 in the air so he has an excuse to blast people, and say it was an accident. He doesn't want us to get to R&D, and get all those glorious things The Computer has provided us to go kill his COMMIE TRAITOR COMRADES!!! Do you guys even know what happened to your first Equipment Guy? I bet SAM does HE HAD HIS BADGE!" WHOOPS jumps up and down pointing at the badge pinned to his chest that SAM gave him. "The only chance we have for mission success is to take out SAM-R-SPD1 because he has been compromised by Commie propaganda. We can only hope that his brother clone SAM-R-SPD2 is untainted by such treachery. SOMEONE CYCLE THIS COMMIE SCUM!!"
** spoiler omitted **
Chuckles, the new guy is getting a little too wound up. Do you have any pills you can give him to calm him down?
Sam keeps walking towards R&D
GM
Ding!
The elevator door opens, and a furious looking Blue citizen, familiar looking to all but Whoops.
"Where's Laim-R-PZO? I have his PDC...I wanna give it back to him..."
Liam
GM only:
Chuckles:
While everyone else has been busy...either shooting or being shot or talking about shooting, Chuckles has been cowering like an animal, with his arms over his head in an overreaction to bumping into Sam.
Once the figurative smoke clears, Chuckles peers through his fingers at the scene taking place in front of him. Whatt has just undergone the most barbaric laser eye surgery ever, and Tataz is now one balloon short of a goodie bag. Chuckles begins to scream with laughter until he can no longer breathe. He gasps and tries to regain some level of composure while everyone else is still yelling at one another. When he finally manages to stand up again, Whoops runs over, spewing his conspiracy theories in Chuckles' face.
Chuckles hesitantly reaches into his troubleshooter bag while mumbling something incoherently. All you can make out is something about a shooting spree. His hand lingers in his bag as he stares suspiciously first at the back of Sam's head, then Whoops' beady eyes, to Tataz's....tatas, to Whatt's slumped corpse, to Liam's camera lens. A hoarse laugh escapes Chuckles' fixed smile. His hand starts to emerge from his bag holding something shiny and red.
He's interrupted by Sam's request to medicate Whoops, and his hand disappears back into the bag as he cackles with a pained look on his face. He mutters something about sleepy pills. Then hollers, "Stop screaming at me! Too many voices at once! I can’t take it!!!" When his hand finally emerges from the bag, he pulls out a single credchip, and thumbs it while yelling repeatedly to the coin in a tormented voice, "What to do? What to do? You’ll tell me what to do!" He flips the credchip into the air fumblingly and it flies down the corridor and rolls down the corridor.
"Nonononono!" He trips over his own feet chasing the credchip as it rolls out of his reach and falls into a crack on the floor. He gives up and suddenly reaches back into his bag and pulls out a laser barrel in one hand and a handful of pills in the other. He waves the barrel wildly and some pills spill onto the floor. Carelessly aiming the laser in Sam’s general direction, he turns his head, shuts his eyes tight, and fires. He follows up by violently flings the entire handful of pills in Whoops’ face and screams, "THERE! IS EVERYONE HAPPY NOW? Chuckles do this, Chuckles do that. Shoot the team leader, Chuckles. Feed the new guy the pills, Chuckles!!!" He runs off in a frantic huff towards the door with alarming speed and screams, "If anyone needs me, I’LL BE IN R&D! I can’t stand all the waiting! I can’t!" In true Chuckles style, he slams directly into the door and struggles in an attempt to pry it open.
GM only:
That’s right. I care more about getting random pills into Whoops’ mouth than I do about whether or not I actually shoot Sam. But speaking of shooting...1d20=13
GM
Ding!
The elevator door opens, and a furious looking Blue citizen, familiar looking to all but Whoops.
"Where's Laim-R-PZO? I have his PDC...I wanna give it back to him..."
Liam ** spoiler omitted **
Liam confidently approaches the blue citizen. "Thank you, kind sir, for returning my PDC. You see, I seem to have lost it at some point, but I just don't remember where or how. Can you please give it back?"
GM:
Liam:
The furious blue citizen suddenly stands there slack-jawed his mouth agape as Liam walks up and takes the PDC from his hand. While his goons are standing there watching the interaction of the RED and BLUE.
Sam:
Chuckles prances about, waving his laser pistol erratically, as he chucks pills at Whoops, not a single pill goes in his mouth, but he is pelted by pills, including one up his nostril and several down his jumpsuit. Tataz is also pelted with pills including one in her laser wound.
Chuckles:
Chuckles then rushes straight for the blast door of R&D, smashing his face on the door as it doesn't open.
Now you notice the red speaker box on the wall next to the door. (remember the door encompasses the entire massive hallway. Large enough to drive the largest of tankbots through.
Whoops wiggles his nose trying frantically to dislodge the pill from his nose."no no no no no!" he stops suddenly putting his finger at the top of the nostril where the pill is and starts pushing down attempting to dislodge the pill. He smiles awkwardly at the progress he is making. His eyebrows furrow together, and he almost uncontrollably begins to use the back of his knuckle to start itching his nose. He winces as the pill is obviously ground up in his nose. His eyes water, and he sneezes twice. WHOOPS looks up smiling laconically. " Well that's a new sensation."
Whoops wiggles his nose trying frantically to dislodge the pill from his nose."no no no no no!" he stops suddenly putting his finger at the top of the nostril where the pill is and starts pushing down attempting to dislodge the pill. He smiles awkwardly at the progress he is making. His eyebrows furrow together, and he almost uncontrollably begins to use the back of his knuckle to start itching his nose. He winces as the pill is obviously ground up in his nose. His eyes water, and he sneezes twice. WHOOPS looks up smiling laconically. " Well that's a new sensation."
** spoiler omitted **
Whoops
Oh and for aiming
Sam approaches the speaker box.
This is trouble shooter team leader Sam-R-SPD-1. We have been sent here by the computer for a Service Service- presumably to field test some fantastic new equipment. May we come in?
The box squawks and squeals a response *SQUAAAAKK* *SQUEEEEEEL* Stan# *BEFSLKKD* *WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO*
The elevator doors open again and a forkliftbot comes out scattering the blue citizen and the green goons,and causing Liam to dive to the side... there are several people frozen in Alphacite (like Han Solo) stacked on the forks.
Tataz you're still in lots of pain from your wound, you're not very happy.
FORLIFTBOT: I HAVE A CLONE REPLACEMENT DELIVERY FOR SAM-R-SPD-1.
"Please slide ME card to accept delivery."
Chuckles:
SAM:
Liam walks confidently towards the door to the testing grounds. "Sir, can you lease hurry up and sign off on Whatt so we can go to R&D?"
GM:
"Stand back, Team Leader." Chuckles screeches, "I'll fix that speaker box!"
Chuckles has clearly lost all inhibition. He gestures for Sam to step aside, takes a step towards the speaker box, and headbutts it repeatedly while cackling maniacally.
Chuckles' PDC beeps, and in an uncharacteristically calm tone, he says, "One moment please, pals. I've gotta take this. And oh Sam, give that speaker box another try. It should be singing loud and clear!"
Chuckles takes out his PDC,
Chuckles: ** spoiler omitted **
GM only:
I want to spend 7 perv points to make sure Sam is distracted enough with the speaker box to not notice the PDC in his pocket.
Out of the blue, Chuckles hauls off at full speed away from the R&D door, waving his arms frantically ain the air, and bellowing, "Get outta my waaaaay! I have to protect my precious pills!!" He dives headlong towards the elevator and throws his arms around his head while gasping for air and choking on laughter.
Chuckles:
Chuckles slams his head against the box, and staggers back SNAFUed.
Chuckles checks his PDC then stumbles dizzly as he goes to put it back
Everyone make d20 rolls
Chuckles: ** spoiler omitted **
Chuckles slams his head against the box, and staggers back SNAFUed.
Chuckles checks his PDC then stumbles dizzly as he goes to put it back
Everyone make d20 rolls
GM
Sam approaches the delivery guy and signs off on the clone.
Thank you sir. I'm sure this one will be much more perfect than the last one. Have a great day!
GM
GM:
GM Only:
As Sam approaches the elevator door, Chuckles scurries away from the group and back towards the R&D door wincing and squealing like a little girl and rambling, "Keepitawaykeepitawayfrommeeee!"
The Forklift botdrops off the top clone, then trundles off.
Now to figure out how to thaw him out. He looks just like Han Solo, only he looks really happy.
There's a beeping coming from Sam's back pocket.
WHOOPS spins around in a circle scratching both his sides "Zowwey zow zow!!" WHOOPS bounces up and down "THATS THE STUFF I TELL YA!! YUP YUP! THE COMPUTER IS MY BESTEST FRIEND!!" WHOOPS skipps down to R&D once there he skips in frount of R&D, saying "open,open,open,open,open!" Then happily skipps into R&D singing nonsensically to himself about the glory of the computers, and little black pills.
There's a beeping coming from Sam's back pocket.
"OH MAN! I'M TOO PRETTY TO GO KABOOM!!!!!"
Chuckles dives in front of the R&D door, with his body forming a shield over his precious happiness kit.
Red lights begins flashing on the blast door, as a Klaxon fills the hall with a blaring alarm...deafening everyone in the hall momentarily with its 140dB volume.
"What do you mean, ka-" Liam then falls to his knees clutching his ears as the siren sounds.
The blue citizen and his posse take the sound of the Klaxon as a signal to depart, as they all hold their heads in agony...
Red laser light illuminates the area in front of the blast doors (washing over Chuckles) as the lock mechanisms are thrown, and steam escapes from the doors.
All but Whoops & Whatt:
Whoops:
Whatt:
GM:
Sam reaches into his back pocket and tries to figure out what is beeping.
He looks around at all the commotion, steam, flashing lights and the like, but just shrugs and waits for the doors to open, while trying to figure out what buttons he needs to push to unfreeze Whatt.
GM
Sam:
Liam:
Sam fiddles around with the buttons and unthaws Whatt-R-BTL-2, then accidentally refreezes him, and then figures out how to thaw him again, luckily you figured out how to unthaw him the second time before brain damage set in due to asphyxiation since when you refroze him, it didn't reactivate life support...Whatt, you're unfrozen Sam pulls the beeping device from his back pocket, it appears to be a PDC...
The blue citizen and his posse take the sound of the Klaxon as a signal to depart, as they all hold their heads in agony...
Red laser light illuminates the area in front of the blast doors (washing over Chuckles) as the lock mechanisms are thrown, and steam escapes from the doors.
Chuckles presses his hands to his ears, while crawling away from the R&D door on his elbows and knees.
"OH THIS IS THE END! WHAT DID I EVER DO TO DESERVE THIS?! I WANT TO LIVE!"