The House's page

Another fine delivery! Let us know if you need further assistance The House says cheerfully.

Looking to the group, he adds Now is a good time to introduce some work-life balance. Drinks are on the House!

House takes another few steps closer, and blasts the mind of Darvix

Mind thrust vs Darvis: 2d10 ⇒ (8, 6) = 14 DC 15 Will for half

Yes, that's right, my mistake. I've adjusted the move action to get within range

Oh, It's not a good idea to go against the house The House remarks as he tries to terminally confuse the crony.

Mind Thrust vs Red, DC 15 Will Save foacr half: 2d10 ⇒ (4, 10) = 14

Reflex: 1d20 ⇒ 1

Huh? What?! SP 2/7

So much for sneaking up calmly...

House is happy to provide some helpful industry insights on climbing fences, but doesn't have the shape or the build to actually climb that thing.

The combination of a power generator and a fence usually means adverse hair conditions The House says, his way of suggesting the fence might be electrified. On a side note, The House seems to be permanently affected by adverse hair conditions.

Perception to check if fence is trapped: 1d20 + 8 ⇒ (18) + 8 = 26

Athletics, Aid Another: 1d20 - 1 ⇒ (12) - 1 = 11

The House typically outsources Strong to third-party contractors

Our Survival subject matter expert delivers a strong performance The House says, looking at Shlushshla's efforts.

Aid, Piloting: 1d20 + 0 ⇒ (16) + 0 = 16

If you turn on the headlights, the road is easier to see! The House says helpfully.

Survival: 1d20 + 8 ⇒ (5) + 8 = 13

The House is an expert at surviving. The House has never been killed, you know

Shlushshla is our mobility consultant The House says with gusto as he is being shaken around in the vehicle there is always a mobilization period where our team is trying to find direction.

Let's a-go!

You know the head gang member? What was his role, and what was his motivation for termination? The House asks.

Diplomacy: 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (6) + 5 = 11

The House, thinking now is a good time to get out the house, eagerly proclaims Shotgun, although he isn't carrying one.

That is to say, he can't drive. The House really doesn't have any practical skills, does he?

The House, not trained in anything useful but communication, just says I'm glad the animals are not ghosts, which would means we are too late. We still have reasonable ground to think we're are early.

Sense Motive: 1d20 + 8 ⇒ (7) + 8 = 15

Having very little in terms of technical skills, the House just uses his people skills to pick something up from the footage. Looks like they knew where they were headed. How easy would it be to get a map of these facilities? Because if it's hard, these guys may have an insider.

Ah! An extinct species, and they're no longer here! A misdemeanor with a missing mistuor! the House says, at this point only listening to his own voice.

The House looks at the security footage with interest.

Perception to see if he spots something peculiar: 1d20 + 8 ⇒ (9) + 8 = 17

Is any other skill check needed, e.g. Survival?

"Sounds like a bunch a twaffle to me. Can you actually do anything besides talk?"

My methods are intellectual property of the house and proprietary The House says, think of me as an enabler exploring the synergies in teamwork. Through strong delegation I manage to punch well above my weight!

An Ijtikri extends a tentacle to claim one of the business cards. It holds the card up to its top set of eyes and spends a few seconds flipping between the two sides, as if trying to solve a puzzle.

The backside of the business card has a logo that says 'The house'

The massive vesk soldier walks up, weapons slung on harness. She greeted everyone with, "Hello. I am Obozaya and I look forward to hitting things very hard with you today. Anyone know what the mission is?"

Oh, that puts us in an excellent position to be market leader at hit! the House says, seeing ample opportunity to delegate hitting to the Vesk.

The House then turns to Otaia My name is the House and i represent the house, and hands out another business card. The House explains I specialise in providing general advisory, utilizing a very specialist approach with a universal applications!, without actually explaining anything.

He adds We are all just currently getting acquainted through an imprompty networking event!, which is his way of saying they just met.

Pleased to meet you, 903! Of course you can communicate with me telepathically! The House says though I'm afraid my own telepathic capabiities are still undergoing evolution, so please expect some delay in my reponse! The House says, omitting to say the delay could be several millions of years.

This is Kludde's character

The House, pleased to meet you

A gnome dressed in formal but slightly flashy business wear stands around.
He is eager to offer anyone near a business card that simply says:

---
The House

The house
---

They call me the House because I represent the House, the gnome clarifies without clarifying anything.

Chronicle looks great. Thanks a lot for running, I had a blast!

Looks good. Are there any other scenarios that are related to this one or the ghibrans?

Yes, there is! Currently 1-21 Yesteryear's sorrow is the sequel (I played it concurrently with this one, which is... weird). It's a good scenario, I can recommend it, and it clears up a lot of backstory to the planet.

Agreed: the RP in this game has definitely been entertaining, and I hope to play with all of you again.

I've sometimes been surprised at how my PCs' personalities develop too. It's honestly fun when that happens, which is why I tend to be excited about signing them up for missions that don't cater to their strengths. There's more room for character growth when it's not smooth sailing and awesomeness all the way.

I think we had a lot of chemistry between our characters in this game, and I just loved the back and forth banter we managed to produce.

Not swayed by the 'difficult stakeholder' stance Anock seems to be taking, House argues Well, that passes over the agency that high Society brass empowers us agents with. House does also not disclose his pay grade.

To me, it sounds like the policy to exclude what are now Husks was the result of 'tactical policy solution', and that the current residents of So What can not be held accountable for this policy. We can act as advisors to the city's current rulers, pointing out the... room for improvement. after all, if resources are not as tight as they were in the past, there may be room for gradual reintegration of the husk ghibranis, improving quality of life for all!

I agree the topic requires ample caution. It is an integration project that would require the right information control, and knowledge to be shared on a need to know basis House adds, which is his way of saying the city's rulers should just keep on lying for now.

TLDR: House would be in favor of telling the city rulers, hoping they acknowledge the errors of their ancestors, but keep the information from the husks, so they don't riot.

The House, happy that the robotic threat has passed, moves into the room as soon as Kuon and Switch establish the area is safe.

Here's a computer terminal. Let's see if we can switch 'faulty electricity' to 'off'

Computers: 1d20 + 1 ⇒ (11) + 1 = 12

Did you know that anyone can be a computer scientist?

Engineering: 1d20 + 1 ⇒ (8) + 1 = 9

Did you know that anyone can be an Engineer? The House says, omitting the 'just not a very good one' from the sentence.

House rushes up to Kuon when he collapses. Kuon is taking a brief hiatus to focus on his health. Please bear with me while I enhance our surviving experience...

Mystic Cure, Kuon: 1d8 + 4 ⇒ (7) + 4 = 11 Plus adding two of my own hit points to restore Kuon to full

Oh, I object to that The House says when Anock calls the situation ridiculous this is merely an unforeseen situation for which the appropriate contingency measures require a policy exception. Nothing out of the ordinary. House says, and his actions imply that the policy exception includes destruction of property, and he shoots once more at the robot.

Pew pew, vs green: 1d20 ⇒ 181d6 ⇒ 4

The House steps up to the wall to get some cover, and asserts that the battery of his laser pistol is charged.

Shoot at Blue: 1d20 ⇒ 61d6 ⇒ 2

The spells of this guy are all mind-affecting :(

Looks like these robots don't agree with our presumed level of security clearance. We'll have to resort to alternative method of authentication The House says as he grabs his blaster and tries to authenticate his way through.

Static-Arc Authentication, vs blue: 1d20 ⇒ 81d6 ⇒ 4

Good going, pockets. I suggest we put all adverse findings in a database, and prioritise resolution by severity. We'll put in place a committee to address the issues, and let the senior stakeholders (that would be us) vote on how to proceed. While that process is pending, I suggest we risk-accept and move on. The House says, rather pleased with the sound risk management practices he just put in place.

Let's just hope we can avoid becoming too vital-diverse down here, he adds, which is the House way of saying he hopes nobody gets killed.

Onward?

After we've exhausted all perception checks, The House is happy to move into the next room

The House puts on the overall, stretching it in one direction and leaving it flopping in the other.

He cheerfully sings:
The gnome's pants are stretchy, strong and tough!
Made of tiger's leather,
they last for a thousand years

The gnome's pants are stinky, stinky!
Made of tiger's leather,
they haven't been washed for a thousand years

The House, looking more like The Greenhouse, agrees with Pockets Let's have a look at the mainframe, looks like a more palatable activity than the current one.

---

Looking at the hallway, the House remarks Let's check for compliance with safety regulations, shall we?

Perception: 1d20 + 8 ⇒ (1) + 8 = 9 Check the entrance for traps

"I'm starving this smells good!"

Pockets doesn't hesitate at the sight of food and takes a full spoon/thing full of the meal in front of him. Pockets starts to reach for a second spoon full but drops the spoon instead. Pockets eyes go wide and his cheek pouches balloon out as he tried to hold the food in. Then vomits in an uncontrollable stream, gasping for air, before falling over backward to the floor.

The House also takes a spoonful of kahlgee.

Fort: 1d20 + 1 ⇒ (5) + 1 = 6

It had to happen

-----
In the first print of this report, I found it necessary to warn the reader against the content of chapter three, the one that starts with 'Pockets and House each took a spoonful of kahlgee...'. Beyond that single sentence, there is nothing in the description that is not utterly revolting, disturbing to the point of inhumanity. No, it was better that the reader skip the chapter altogether. Of course, this warning had quite the opposite effect - most readers would indeed ignore the first two chapters of my accurate transcription of Starfinder records, and head straight for the chapter that started with 'Pockets and House each took a spoonful of kahlgee...', only to be witness to its mind-bending grotesqueness. Therefore, in the current edition of this chronicle, I have decided to redact all sequences that can be considered as being disproportionally off-putting.
----Starfinder Chronicles Volume III, second print - Preface

------
Pockets and House each took a spoonful of kahlgee.
----Starfinder Chronicles Volume III, second print - Chapter 3 (unabridged)

With apologies to Venedikt Jerofejev

House tries to replicate the bow. The House aims to be the undisputed leader in communicate, no naturally I see the synergies in having magical assistance!

The House flops onto his chair.

"So what's the name of this city?"

So what is an excellent name for a city! The House exclaims, leaving enough pause for a single loud groan, should Anock want to make one. This city seems to be gravity-neutral, though I must myself admit to have a bias to the ground-side. Too much porridge when I was young, most like!

The House also has a cardio-vascular system with plenty of room for improvement, so he sincerely hopes the elevator has been invented already on this planet.

We are very good at discouraging beasts, such as this plus-sized cat. The House says, pointing to the pieces of dead cat that envelop Kuon. Do they come in plusser sizes than this one, though? That may be cause for strategic rethinking. The House say, trying to avoid saying 'running away'

It is against House policy to betray you, The House ascertains, not least because his group is in the minority here, and favours are extended on a discretionary basis!

Which is House's way of saying 'depends on what you ask'.

You know their word for 'discretionary, right? he then asks Anock.

Thanks for botting!

"She's casting share language it won't hurt you!"

It's a great tool for inclusivity, though House policy precludes it from being used in any language test!

The House holds to see if Anock manages to communicate.

Only works on one person?

The house tries to guess what moves the ghibrani expect, trying to predict and copy movements as the creatures make them. He tries his best, but looks utterly inelegant.

Sense motive: 1d20 + 8 ⇒ (6) + 8 = 14 If allowed

I hope everyone is still having fun.

Definitely!

I should be returning to regular posting frequencies this week.

Perception: 1d20 + 8 ⇒ (3) + 8 = 11

The House feels like he doesn't have the correct number of limbs or the right center of mass, Aha! We're having a little shindig. I'm afraid I'll need a choreography consultant now. All I know is the Qabarat Hula, and I don't think that's going to help me here.

As soon as The House gets the impression the Ghibrani want him to join in, he'll join with whatever jerky movement he has to offer.

Culture: 1d20 + 3 ⇒ (1) + 3 = 4

The House gets a little carried away with naming things, and just cheerfully points out object and names them Ah, tree, leafs, necklace, child, grampa

Culture: 1d20 + 3 ⇒ (12) + 3 = 15

Pockets uses the translator and figures out that the creature is saying "Dystane" and when she you figure out she's female points to the other creatures, she's saying "Ghibrani"

All of you? The House says, then realizes his own group has something in common. Starfinders! he says cheerily, as if that clarifies anything Explore, report, cooperate

He makes an elaborate bow, and looks at the creatures with a smile.

I've had some unexpected circumstances come up. I'll likely be completely offline tomorrow, and less active over the weekend. Sorry for the inconvenience.

Well, The House says as he eyes the newcomers we might face some challenging communication, but I have just the accelerator for that, and then turns to his travel companions and asks it's unlikely they speak common. Who has the translator?

The House will turn it on. Hopefully it also works here.

They say even a dead cat makes a bounce! House says, summarizing his success on the stock market and trying to rattle the big cat.

Mind Blast!: 2d10 ⇒ (7, 6) = 13 DC 15 Will for half

The House lays down further discouragement, but misses this time around

Pew pew: 1d20 ⇒ 81d6 ⇒ 6

We should have brought a gnoll, The House says as he tries to mess with the mind of the cat Shoo! Shoo! SHOO!

Mind thrust: 2d10 ⇒ (4, 1) = 5 DC 15 Will for half

The house is making those noises again...

Pew pew!: 1d20 ⇒ 161d6 ⇒ 4