Celebrity Bard (lead singer)
Archeologist Bard (lute)
Magician Bard (keyboards)
Bardbarian (drummer)
Speaking from experience? Bardbarian archeologists also make great lutists.
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This situation was perfect. It was finally time to hone the technique he had learned that one time when he had to escape from a midget and a one eyed halfling back in the old country. (NOTE: Rekkstuff is not from the old country, and this story is a lie.) "Okay, guys. I think I could pop it, if you want."
"That way, eh?" Rekkstuff knew enough to keep his mouth shut while dealing with the priest. He tended to be best at breaking relationships. Not making them better. (Also it let him skip the bill, an amazing trick for most restaurants) He pulls out his axe-guitar and strums a chord. "That way it is." He had only once questioned Tobar's sense of direction. It didn't end well.
Rekkstuff shows his remaining 25 gold. "It's my booze and whores money, but... if it helps."
I can be a distraction if you need one! :D
"If the guy's alive now, he'll probably be alive in a couple of days after you've stopped being punched in the soul or whatever." Rekkstuff concludes. "Then we can smash stuff."
Rekkstuff leans back. "We are..." He then puts a hand on his hip. "...But... On the other hand... I AM really pissed. Stupid fruit. And dogs. God, I want to break something." He pauses, and looks at the woman. "Would I get to break something."
Meanwhile, a short ways away... "FRUIT CARRRRRRRRRRT!"
Or standing in the remains of a former fruit cart.
Ok. So. I know that thus might be resulting in the death of a character, and I know I'm being no help this encounter, but darned if Rekkstuff's conga line of failures aren't making me laugh.
Rekkstuff again valiantly attempts to jump the fruit cart, because darn this fruit cart.
And then Rekkstuff was mired in a fruit cart. ...yep. "That tears it. Worst. Chase. Ever."
Now taking bets: will I get to the combat before the fight ends?
Rekkstuff hits Obstacle 5, and tries to jump over it.
Unfortunately, the inevitable happens.
On his next round, Rekkstuff again tries to get the dog out of his way. Steeling his nerves and taking a deep breath, he shouts at the dog as loudly as he can, putting his musician's lungs to work.
Despite his first instinct being 'murder the @#$# dog,' Rekkstuff had to respect the balls of anything that would bark at a sexy god of rock and death carrying a guitar-axe. So he just yelled at it to get the heck out of his way.
Unfortunately, his heretofore unmentioned phobia of dogs manifested itself suddenly, and his voice creaked a little, ruining the effect.
"A bit." Rekkstuff mutters back, looking around the room. "Hah. Bet those sad-sack backwoods failures aren't going to be anywhere near a venue like this one. It's a pity. Would have loved to kick their arses."
"Toooootally am." Sometime later... "Let's not rule anything out, Victor. It might be a good opening act."
"Huh... Playing before the king..." We interrupt this thread for a Rekkstuff Thought Process:
Scene: The king's palace. Time: After rocking his socks off.
"REKKSTUFF VANHALEN!" "Yes, your kingly mckingliness?" "Your guitar playing was superb! Indeed, you are the greatest rocker in all the entire world. My kingdom bows to your superior guitar playing!!" "Why thank you, sir. I am pretty darn awesome." "How about you marry my daughter? Actually, how about you marry all twelve of my daughters!" "Are they hot?" "YES!" Several hot women came through a formerly unmentioned side-door and swarmed the rocker. "I guess I could take them of your hands..." He began to laugh. Rekkstuff is making an odd laughing noise, but seems to enjoy this plan.
Character sheet updated. I have gone from a self-based spike of d8+7 to a self-based spike of d12+8. A worthy boost. Also I now have a 15 STR. In hindsight, I should have put my 18 there and a 14 in cha. OH WELL. 8U
Moments before, in the vault...:
Rekkstuff had been checking around, looking through the gargantuan mound of stuff.
Then, he laid eyes upon it. It was a legend, the sorts of things other bards spoke rumors of, the thing he had needed since he had set out, but hadn't been able to find. Quickly, Rekkstuff put the spell component pouch around his waist, looking around to make sure there were no rivals for its sweet sweet bounty of spellcasting components. Then, he saw her. He had no idea how she had ended up in a gnoll treasury like this. It was the sort of weapon that was manufactured maybe once in an age. He grabbed it from where it stood atop a small pile of coins, and turned it over in his hands. It was a Gibson Flying V. He knew the workmanship immediately, it was the sort of thing he had drooled over, staring in a window of a shop display as a child. His hands ran down the strings of the instrument, and he played a chord quickly. It was a beautiful sound, even having lain here for ages it was still on key. Such was the craftsmanship of the Flying V. He ran a hand down its length to the end of it, running a finger alongside the smooth groove of the axe. It was sharpened to a fine line. Truly, it was designed as a weapon and a musical instrument--he knew from reading a catalog that it worked wonderfully from both a murder and a music perspective. He wanted it. And from the look of things, it wanted him. This was a meeting of fate. Rekkstuff took the instrument and put it on his back, making an x-shape alongside his Rickenbacker 4001. Looking around the room, he next grabbed a particularly magic-looking Mithral Chain Shirt. It was light, and it was pretty. Good for murdering, and cleans up to go from day to nightwear. He then grabbed several potions off the wall, putting them into his backpack, before grabbing a small swipe of coin and calling it a day. Back in the moment, Rekkstuff quirks an eyebrow, hearing Vinnie. "Well, as long as we have him run his crazy schemes by us BEFORE signing up for them, it should be okay. Right?"
...2300+300+20 gp = 2620 gp total. +5 for the Spell Component Pouch (FINALLY) = 2625. Now to burn another 2375 in stuff! I'll have the post up in a few.
Hmm... tough question. I think if you could have it modified, perhaps bladed down the bottom, that'd be pretty bad@ss. Then, it also becomes easily enchanted as a weapon, as well. ...A greataxe that is modified to also be a guitar. That is the badassest thing. Hey Mr. GM. Is this a thing that can be done?
Sounds like a plan. Once I've got the gear picked out, I'll have Rekkstuff pick it up. One other question: Rekkstuff wielding a weapon that is not a guitar. ...Is this a thing we'd like to see? I ask because a +1 Greataxe/Greatsword costs about 1700 gp less than a Belt of Str +2, and would have an equal effect on attack/damage.
...So guys. For the treasure thing. Would you guys like me to focus on 'being useful out of combat' or 'breaking faces with the quickness and the fury?' I'm leaning towards the latter, as our party is already all kinds of useful out of combat.
"Definitely should have been warned." Rekkstuff tunes his guitar again. "Seriously though... it ended well enough. We brought awesome to a completely new culture. And it was pretty sexy. Also I got to hit a lion in the face with a guitar. Can't be a total waste, right guys?"
I'll have to get my level done when I can, hopefully tommorrow. I've been without web access as a lovely surprise for a @#$# week. Anyways, I'll reacquaint myself now.
In Rekkstuff's own case, there is something manic about the way he is guitaring the heck out of his guitar.
We don't need a sneaky pete, and smashing things is out.. so he'll be sitting out and practicing and tuning his guitar. And sleeping at some point probably.
"...So. We got two options. Either we rock the hell outta these guys tommorrow, or we escape into that good night, never come back, and never speak of this again. Ever."
1.
1.
..could be worse, could be better.
For a group that big, I guess it would be. The base DCs aren't so bad, but...
That felt so good.
Rage round 4. HP: 24/28(?), Lingering Performance: 1 round Since Rekkstuff got his guitar back, he's been in a bit of a roaring mood. See, that lion bit him. And Rekkstuff wanted to bite the Lion back. Except Rekkstuff couldn't bite lions, so instead he settled for bashing it with his guitar from the other side of Victor.
"THAT is why you do chew on Rekstuff VanHalen!"
Rage round 3. Ending Archaeologist's Luck, Lingering Performance: 2 rounds Rekkstuff drops his dagger to the ground, 5' steps a little away from the lion, and picks up his guitar once more.
In seriousness, Rekkstuff would most likely be held sideways in his mouth, by the torso. Which is what I was picturing.
Yes. Part of me is in its mouth. I imagine it's probably like. His torso. I doubt severely that all of Rekkstuff is in his mouth. I am also aware that Rekkstuff's phrase was bad. That was on purpose.
HP: 18/28, 2nd Rage Round Rekkstuff found himself (Unfortunately) grappled by a lion. 'Caught in the lion's paw,' wasn't the phrase? If it wasn't it was now. Rekkstuff's signature Rickenbaker 4001 hit the ground. It made a small strumming noise as it did.
He pulled a dagger as he roared right back at the lion. With a angry glare, he tried to stab the lion right in the side as he wrestled with it.
"YOU DO NOT INTERRUPT MY GUITAR SOLO!"
Rekkstuff brandishes his guitar, pointing it at the lion the same way a batter points at the wall when intending to knock it out of the park. He wanted the crowd on his side, and like any rocker winning over a crowd was what he was best at. Those in the crowd would know the classic signs of someone flying right off the handle and into the end of the universe, as Rekkstuff loosed a primal roar.
He then does what any sane rocker would in front of a giant snarling lion: He charges it and tries to smack it in the face before playing a short riff on his weapon of choice.
Ack! I did forget one thing. BAB bonuses scale for the Performance combat bonus. From +1-+5 you get +1 to the check, 6-10 +2, and so on. It scales like that for the perform checks as well. 1-5 ranks is +1, 6-10 +2, etc. Ehehe, missed that my first run-through.
Except for how I now have to look up how Performance Combat works. :P The most important part is knowing your bonus to performance combat rolls. It's your Charisma + Your BAB + any ranks in Perform (Act, Comedy, or Dance), whichever is highest. Note that your trained bonus doesn't get applied. For instance, Rekkstuff has a +2 BAB, a +4 Cha, and 1 rank in Perform (Comedy), so he gets a +7 to his Performance Combat checks. Using a performance weapon grants a combatant a +2 bonus on performance combat checks, so if his guitar counts as one, this grows to +9. You get to make a check whenever a trigger is hit as a swift, free, or immediate action. For instance, knocking an enemy prone lets you make a check as a swift action, and entering a rage for the first time in a combat lets you do one as a free action. Rolling max damage with a weapon or feinting/tripping the enemy are also ways to get a check. If you beat the crowd's DC, you make them like you one step more, and the more they like you, the easier things are. Their bonuses/penalties apply to all attack rolls, combat maneuver checks, ability checks, skill checks, and saving throws. Importantly, this does mean it affects your Performance Combat bonus. We want to get them up to helpful, which gives us a +2 bonus to everything, and we want to kick this lion's butt while doing it. And that is Performance Combat in a nutshell. The specifics can be found here.
Does a guitar count as a performance weapon?
This is officially the perfect fight.
Rekkstuff is confident enough in his ability to break things to stay where he's at. Instead, he takes a moment to tune up his guitar; you need to make sure it works properly after braining a moron with it.
" is always ready to play." Rekkstuff boasts, folding his arms. "Though. For the record. Any changelings we have may want to play better, because we've already lost one drummer due to keyboarding issues."
"But... Jordon's a human." Rekkstuff replied incredulously. "Everyone knows humies can't hold their liquor. And he's glowing. He's glowing right now! Humies don't glow either!"
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