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Action 1 She tapped Palisade on the shoulder, “I'd also add my opinion to the Forged's, regarding motive of those seeking to court you. If they are put off by the misfortune that has befallen you, I strongly suggest that you yourself wouldn't want them as a paramour” "Agreement. A mate that would only accept pieces of the wonderful whole that is you is not a mate worth pursuing," Palisade said, nodding its head. "Suggestion. If such individuals approach you, Lady d'Deneith, you need only to point them out to this one and it shall eliminate them." Action2 Mei'Vi raised her hand and said, "My vote is Regalport! Bigger and more expensive means better beds and nicer food. Might as well start there." Palisade nodded its head in agreement, producing a sound of metal striking metal as its newly attached copper beard scraped against its plate gorget. The 'forged was quite pleased with its latest model - the idea of hollowing out the originally solid block of copper had been an inspired one, as the first iterations of the beard had weighted enough to put a constant strain on its neck just to keep its head level. And the clever placement of the screws, thanks to unit Squeak's assistance, allowed it to remove the patriarchal reputation aid when needed, in favor of a new and improved model. Palisade was already noticing the effect - people it passed on the streets often stopped to stare at the shining new glory of its chin. Clearly, it was working as intended. It could hardly wait for them to return to Sharn so it could get back to converting the masses to the One True Faith.
"Hold your horses, Squeak. First of all, it's a big jump from liaisons to childbirth - at least in my case. And what plans do you two have that need revising?" She placed her hands on her hips and her eyes narrowed ever so slightly, "Since when do your plans affect my decisions about who I'm with?" "Unit Squeak, this one believes this is a moment where a tactful approach is required," Palisade said. "Lady d'Deneith, there are no plans that affect your decisions as to who you spend time with. We are, however, required to do our best to ensure your safety, and a Lady of your social and financial status may draw the attention of fortune seekers. Thus, when we determine a suitor is a potential risk factor we seek to influence his actions and motives, not yours," Palisade explained helpfully.
Action 2
Palisade was perplexed. What did beard and fruit have to do with each other. Unless... as it thought about the matter, it did recall seeing some decidedly hairy fruits on sale on certain market stalls in Sharn. Not needing to eat it had not paid any particular attention on such things, but perhaps its squad-mate, much more world-wise of the two, was onto something with his subtle hints... Action 3 Bronwyn straightened up and patted both Palisade and Squeak on the arm, "I'm sure Lucina will love whatever you get her. The fact that you thought of her enough to bring her back something is a gift in itself." "It may well be as you say, Lady d'Deneith, but careful planning does help ensure success," Palisade said, then cocked its head to one side as a thought occurred to it. "Unit Squeak... this one has just realized something. It may be that not many people have drawn a connection between books and flavors like you just did. Perhaps, at a later date, you might seek to employ this new concept and extend it to your dietary establishment. This one is considering themed evenings, built around a particular popular book. You could ride the success of the author by enhancing the experience, engaging multiple senses of the patrons. Foods to entice their palate, odors to tease their sense of smell, illusions to conjure colored mood lightning and shapes of light and shadow on the walls, music or at least ambient sounds. All suited to the current chapter of the book. Perhaps a narrator reading the book aloud so your patrons would have their hands free to more efficiently enjoy your cooking." "Indeed, you might call it Extra-Sensory Partaking," the 'forged suggested, enjoying its rare moment of creativity.
Action 5 "Perhaps a..." Squeak took a leap of faith "Spicy book? With a sweet hero and a bitter heroine?" Palisade hesitated at this new concept. It lacked the sense of taste and smell, so such concept were quite alien to the ‘forged, but it felt compelled to participate in the conversation nevertheless. ”Perplexed. This one was not aware books were flavored. Query. Would sprinkling sugar and powdered pepper on the pages help achieve the required result?”
Action 4 Squeak looked confused for a moment, “162. I very much think she should come with us. She would be quite the celebrity in Sharn, and we could refurbish her chassis. I'd love to see her properly restored. Those sleek lines, and smooth curves...” he trailed off. “Palisade? What do you think?” "Enthusiastic agreement. Unit 162's dedication to her duty is an example for us all. It is only proper for her to be restored to peak physical efficiency. Suggestion. It is, of course, her own prerogative to choose a new Purpose for herself, but this one is sure the Church of the Creator-Goddess could use her services as we seek to save the souls of the heathens of Sharn." Action 5
Palisade nodded its agreement at Lady d'Deneith's superior knowledge of the subject, herself being a female approximately of age with previous companion Lucina Mindragus, even though it had been rather impressed with unit Squeak's suggestion of the suitability of clothes as gifts, considering his theory had been so well based on physical realities. "A reasonable suggestion, Lady d'Deneith. Query. Do you have an idea what kind of a book previous companion Lucina Mindragus might enjoy? This one was thinking of a romantic novel of some sort, since it seemed her quest for a wealthy mate had not advanced much when this one last met her to query her progress."
"Palisade. It has come to my attention through several mentions of 'previous companions' that traveling with this group may be hazardous to one's health. Exactly how many 'previous companions' have you entertained in the course of this contract!?" ”Request acknowledged. There have been three previous companions who are no longer with us. Number one. Precious companion Rathan Two-Tribes whose bodily odor could make women swoon,” Palisade replied matter-of-factly. ”He parted ways with us to join our employer of the time on another mission. Number two. Precious companion Rokko, the heretical follower of the Silver Flame. He left us after our mission to the Mournland. Third, Precious companion Lucina Mindragus. She was with us until the beginning of this mission, and is presumably still in Sharn, learning the intricacies of shopping.”
Action 3
"Partially. This one is struggling with the design, considering we have to incorporate touch plates sensitive enough to trigger under average household spider's weight and blades sharp and fast-moving enough to cut such a light foe rather than merely fling it away unharmed," Palisade replied. "But this time, this one was considering the matter of facial hair. Even though this one has already settled on the grand design, there are any number of minute details to decide on. Thus, this one has been observing the male mammals we encounter, trying to catalogue differences in style so it might end up with the final design most suggestive of patriarchal authority. Honest observation. This one has also found out its skills at sketching are sorely lacking." The 'forged showed Squeak one page filled with painstakingly delicate line drawings that didn't resemble anything much beyond a chaotic mess, until one took into account the lack of depth perception of someone with only a single eye and how it might affect the way it perceived the world. Action 4 Bronwyn gave an unladylike snort, "This is Adderport. I shudder to think what passes for cuisine here and I highly doubt there's much shopping let alone high end shopping. But I guess there isn't much else to do but look." "Observation. It is shame previous companion Lucina Mindragus is no longer with us," Palisade thought aloud. "If this town's level of available shopping is inferior, it would have served as a good trial run for the purpose we sought to construct for her. Suggestion. Perhaps we should buy her a souvenir? This one believes such action is considered appropriate when one is traveling while a companion remains behind."
”Addendum. After which you shall be turned into sausages, cooked and served to dogs of questionable pedigree,” Palisade repeated the relevant parts of its earlier promise matter-of-factly. Vi sighed, sounding tired. "It takes so much work to make sausages, Palisade. Can we just cut him into chunks and throw those to the dogs?" Declaration. Such half-posteriored approach sounds unprofessional, companion Mei'Vi. This one has been told revenge is a serious business and should not be rushed."
"No you can't just go," Vi said, her voice incredulous. "You can come with us, and be turned into the authorities, or be killed, at our pleasure." ”Addendum. After which you shall be turned into sausages, cooked and served to dogs of questionable pedigree,” Palisade repeated the relevant parts of its earlier promise matter-of-factly.
Right you are... I was looking at 1st level hp by mistake.
With the prisoners secured and immediate medical crisis averted, Palisade busied itself dragging the fallen enemies to one spot by the road, out of the way but handily all close together, then began going through their gear and possessions for anything that might be useful or could be used to verify or challenge the prisoners' answers.
Right... level-up HP: +11
"We need answers from them!" "Agreement. We can always kill them after they have been questioned. Doing things in the opposite order often leads to difficulties," Palisade added helpfully, but focused its attention to healing, not worrying over the prisoners' continued good health.
Despite the obvious problem that dogs did not like pepper.
"Declaration. For that, your remains shall be minced, combined with gently caramelized onions, some salt and black pepper, stuffed into big intestines, cooked and served to dogs of questionable pedigree," Palisade said, a touch of actual emotion in its voice as it locked its gaze on the thug who had dared strike Lady d'Deneith. The presence of the Karrnathi undead still challenging it prevented it from doing anything about the matter immediately, but while its shield and mace were busy deflecting attacks it repeated its previous performance by touching Bronwyn's leg with its own armored foot and used the physical connection to channel a burst of positive energy into the sorceress' body.
Rivulets of molten metal from its magically scorched armor ran down Palisade's body plating, hardening quickly as the pillar of fire vanished as quickly as it had appeared. Its shield and armor took blows, almost bringing it to its knees. Almost. For at least for the moment, it still stood and fought. While its summoned weapon continued to pester the formidable enemy spellcaster, the 'forged nudged Vi's body with its foot, invoking the Creator-Goddess for a blessing of healing.
@Palisade: I feel your frustration but they are not instant kills. Palisade was hit by the karrnathi, by the thug, and by the flame strike, albeit all in the same round. I keep forgetting about your 'blessing', can we assume that you always put that on your armor? If that's the case, then Palisade is at 'critical wounds'; you may act.
Palisade squared off with the Karrnathi undead who had come to meet it, both warriors evenly matched in resolve. The two traded blows, hammering each other's shields and blocking weapons before Palisade found an opening. The 'forged took a quick half-step forward, slamming its shield into the undead's face to block its vision momentarily while its mace swung with deadly accuracy to strike the creature's leading foot's knee with a resounding cracking sound.
"Declaration. If you want to fight, fight something bigger than yourselves," Palisade said calmly, irritated though it felt itself as the enemies' bolts hit Lady d'Deneith while its armor defeated the attakc. "Helpfully. If bigger enemies prove too difficult for you to locate, this one is happy to chop off your legs to provide you with larger pool of suitable opponents to choose from." The 'forged touched the holy symbol engraved on its shield and murmured a quick blessing, conjuring a spectral smith's hammer into being behind the assumed enemy leader and turned its attention away from the magical weapon even as it smacked the woman painfully on her left shoulder. For there were many other foes to challenge, and provisional companion Fendir was already on his way to engage the trio on the road. Thus the 'forged priest decided to head south, interposing itself between the archers and Bronwyn in the hopes of attracting attacks from the archers while closing on the enemy undead.
He paused "If possible could we capture a few? I have some experiments I would like to perform and subjects would be helpful. Note so long as torso and head survive I am confident I can keep them alive long enough. I will need their tongues and vocal chords intact." ”Agreement. We are still to perfect the spider kill device for Lady d’Deneith. And while living subjects would be ideal, this one believes even a perished unit would have some value – we could use it to make sure the device won’t slice off the wearer’s lips while performing the spider execution action.”
*Squeakwp-* Palisade stared at the colorful large-beaked jungle bird sitting on a branch of a nearby tree burst into flame as a crackling blue arc of lightning hit it with deadly results. And the arc of energy persisted, too, the ‘forged noted with interest, watching the little avian’s body being scorched into charcoal. Trouble was, Palisade had been aiming at a large fruit hanging from the same branch, two feet to the left of the unfortunate little creature. ’Note. Accuracy leaves something to be desired,’ the ‘forged thought, wondering if practice would improve things. It reasoned it’d have ample time to experiment on that during their trek back to civilization. That momentary lapse in concentration was enough for Palisade to lose hold of the unfamiliar magic and the electric arc blinked out. The ‘forged’s single eye followed the remains of the bird – now a blackened husk – fell to the ground and shattered into pieces. Still, this was a new weapon to add to its arsenal, and even though power rarely came without a price, Palisade rather doubted not using this new magic he had been granted for whatever reason would be the answer.
Palisade stared at the back of its right hand with detached curiosity. The basic form was that of a Dragonmark, and while the 'forged wasn't so well versed in the differences of the various marks to recognize it, its reddish color was unlike any it had seen or had heard about. And that was quite beside the point that no Warforged to its knowledge had ever manifested one. "Observation. This is most surprising," the 'forged said. "You too? How do you feel?" "This one is functioning normally," Palisade replied, deciding to ignore the Mark on its body plating. "The presence of these Dragonmarks is a mystery, though. This one believes no known spell or magic has been able to bestow a Mark on a person. Until now. Although the coloration of these Marks seem unusual."
"I submit to you that scrapping me here would be problematic. We are already overloaded, and that would add six hundred pounds to be carried by the organics. I suggest that I be decertified for combat, and carry the load back to Adderport." "Unit Squeak, you were not alone at failing in the challenge against the undead creature," Palisade replied calmly. "Observation. This one did manage little beside distracting the enemy until it proceeded to almost dismantle this one. We were both saved by the might of Lady d'Deneith. A failure to us as her bodyguards, but a sign that she is growing to eclipse us, outgrowing her need for us." "Suggestion. Seeking perfection is a laudable goal, but not an easy road to travel, and not a goal one is perhaps even meant to reach," the 'forged went on, a touch of introspection in its voice. "Instead of falling into despair, you should take time to run a tactical analysis of the battle, identify mistakes and tactics that would have been superior to the ones you ended up choosing and use the knowledge to take one step further on that steep road to your full potential." "For did the Creator Goddess herself say: "If it works, it works and leave it well enough alone. If it doesn't, make it to.""
After they'd convinced themselves there were no more secrets hiding down here, Vi said, "Okay, let's go back upstairs. I feel like I could sleep for a week. We have our sentinels to keep watch...you know, I really feel badly for you two sometimes. I can't imagine not getting to, or even wanting to sleep, especially after something like this." "There is no need to feel guilty, companion Mei'Vi. Declaration. We were created not to succumb to the many weaknesses of the flesh. It is only reasonable to expect one to make use of the abilities it was born with. So please take advantage of the opportunity and sleep in peace. We shall remain awake, watching."
When Palisade had assured himself that Bronwyn was okay, Vi asked, "Do you have enough energy to give me a wash? It's still burning, and I think I need to see the damage." ”Complying,” Palisade said, standing up – with considerable effort, it noted to its dismay. The forged’s single eye scanned the room, noting that other than the two women, everyone was laying on the ground in various states of disrepair. ”Apologies. It would seem this one is required to provide some medical attention. Perhaps you can help yourself unless you would prefer to wait?” Palisade said, offering its decanter to Vi before proceeding to provide emergency healing for its fallen companions.
The wizard looked at the potion and then looked at Vi, "This better work. It has to work." She then proceeded to pour it into Palisade's mouth. Darkness gave way to light as the healing draught did its work and Palisade’s single eye lit up, focusing on Bronwyn’s face. ”Lady d’Deneith,” Palisade said, noting the weakness in its own voice, gradually becoming aware of the multitudes of injuries its body had sustained. ”Observation. This one seems to have stopped functioning for moment. The fact this one was returned to consciousness would suggest the enemy has been eliminated. Reassured. This one did not doubt your magic would prove equal to the task, Lady d’Deneith. Query. Did any of our force sustain fatal injuries? If so, may this one suggest the presence of lava will make the safe disposal of bodies convenient?”
Squeak's hand moved from reservoir to reservoir, unscrewing caps, puncturing seals. Oil trickled around him. "Palisade." Squeak's voice was modulated strangely. "Command: Move Fendir and Bronwyn behind me. I am detonating." "Observation. Unit Squeak, the basis of your decision is flawed. You are undamaged. This one is not. Logic argues against an able combat unit wasting itself to save a spent unit of questionable operational value,” Palisade said calmly, making another attempt to bash in the mummy’s head and was yet again deflected with ease. ”If a sacrificial pawn is needed, this one is much more suitable for the role.”
Palisade struggled with the mummy, pleased that it had managed to draw the undead creature's ire but regretful it's own attacks were being reflected with such ease. With its weapon hand now compromised, the 'forged tried to slam its shield into the creature's face, but that tactic, too, produced slim results.
The undead monster managed to rid itself of its suddenly blazing-hot ornament disappointingly quickly, Palisade thought, reassessing the situation. It knew the enemy was largely immune to its physical attacks, but to ensure its attention didn’t move in the direction of assaulting Lady d’Deneith, someone had to engage it in melee. Perhaps several someones, considering the speed with which the enemy managed to down its opponents. Well, if anything, Palisade was suitable as focus of an enemy’s attention, the ‘forged thought as it pursued the mummy, swinging its mace. The body was blocked with contemptuous ease, however, by a thin, desiccated arm that nevertheless held power to rival the ‘forged’s.
Palisade had tried to interpose itself in the way of the mummy's corrosive breath but had been too slow, as the irritatingly long litany of expected immunities and resistances one might expect a mummy to have occupied its attention. The 'forged concluded there was very little it could do that was truly effective against such a foe, but it did have one blessing available that might at least occupy the undead creature's attention for a moment. Murmuring an invocation to the Creator-Goddess, Palisade gestured at the heavy golden jewellery the dead thing still wore, causing it to blaze with sudden, sullen, light. Tendrils of smoke immediately followed, as the metal heated up as if the metal had been heated in a forge, searing the unliving flesh.
Action 1
"Admonishment. Companion Mei'Vi. We are already embarked on one mission. This one doubts we'd have the provisions for mounting another expedition before we finish with our current objectives," Palisade replied completely seriously. Action 2
Palisade wasn't particularly surprised or impressed as the sarcophagus's resident rose to complain the noise - the 'forged simply wasn't built for such thoughts and feelings. What it was built for was violence, and thus the head of its mace came down to meet the undead lizard's snout ever as it was still rising to its feet. "Cadaver number one, would you happen to be in the possession of an ancient crown once displayed in this very chamber? This one would be delighted if you could point us to it," it said, noting that Bastion, perhaps sensing the danger more acutely than his little brother, had bolted from his nest and was making a beeline away from the mummy. Clearly he had already ascertained where the artifact was being held and was trying to share the information with them. How very thoughtful of him, Palisade thought.
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