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Greetings! I'm Keyrock. You may remember me from such training products as, "20 AC Abs", "Ultimate Rage Cycling", and "BAARGH!" (now available in Common).
In the next three minute demonstration I will show you how my specially designed "Orc Lifestyle Guide" can help you strike back at those who have angered or offended you or done anything not really to your liking:
Step 1: Inspire Others to Rage!
Learn to express your true feelings of anger -- especially through songs of battle and bloodshed! When your friends are just as mad as you, you feel better and can start to build a new sense of community around skull-bashing and rock-splitting (and vice versa),
Step 2: Amplify your Rage and SHARE IT!
Embrace your Orc heritage with Amplified Rage. But don't let your anger bottle up inside you, but in everyone around you too! Whether you are a self-righteous Paladin (Tactician) or a ill tempered Cavalier (Constable), there is no reason other people shouldn't be just as angry as you!
Step 3: For True Greatness, Wait for the Right Moment!
There is a certain magic and wonder in that moment when your party meets that Chimera face to face to face to face to face. And there's even more Honor and Glory when the very next moment, the Chimera is laid low by a great-axe. Help your friends unlock their true potential with a Wand of Moment of Greatness.
Now you can take your whimpy +13 str and increase it to +19 as your charge into battle! But wait, with your party powered by Moment of Greatness, that's really +25!
And if after 30 days you're not fully satisfied with Keyrock's complete "Orc Lifestyle Guide" plus your bonus morning star and long spear through this one time offer, return it free of charge, if you dare.
The preceding has been paid for by Keyrock and Co. The views expressed are strictly his own and not necessarily our own. Unless he is in the room looking at us. Then our views are the same.