Gittik's page

HIM RIGHT! YOU NO MAKE BARBARAN! ONLY ONE BARBARAN! AM GITTIK! ME KILL YOU BARBARAN! YOU BARBARAN SUCK BALL!

Look at recent posts, then scroll to the bottom, and you will see that they have multiple pages now.

This is easy now that I can go through my entire list of posts.

Wow, never noticed that before. How useful.

"Heh, me bet snake me bigger than in cave."

I still haven't spent my loot yet - about 14k's worth I believe? - so I'll do that before we head out.

"Me say we use sea cave vector. Go in, kill someone. Sound good."

Since we’re sharing on this thread, I guess I’ll let you all know that I’m going to be a father for the second time in December too. I’m thrilled – and freaked out all at once!

What? Guys, keep it in a single post or something. Congrats Mothy (and Raggy).

I'm pretty sure it'll work out OK, especially as the Norwegian job market is so much better than the American one (Norwegian unemployment: 2%; US unemployment: 11% officially, but more probably somewhere around 18%). It's just piling up: my dad just lost his foot, my brother needs some serious surgery, my wife's firm put everyone on 4-day weeks... We just found out she's pregnant, so I just want to have a job before the baby arrives (January). It's been an... eventful summer.

Reading on... Congratulations, but it helps to add to the stress levels too. Best wishes for you, little Vatters and the Missus. Baby Aubrey (aka Tarquin aka Tarkers aka James) is due in a few weeks.

Altai Iscarni wrote:

At least you guys have jobs... :(

Sorry dude. But aren’t you like a phd student or something? EDIT: Ah, I see your post above .... And if you don’t have a job ... that means you should have a lot of time on your hands ... why aren’t you running a pbp game? ;-)

Yeah, sorry to hear that. I'm more stressed than very busy - we are not flavour with management.

Work hell at the moment.

I'm a subscriber but I don't have it yet and if you plan to run it I will desist from reading it.

I might get a few things. Didn't you put the total a few pages back?

"Yeah, me crazy, but me get laid too. Hey, Deaf and Blind, you have trouble with girl boyfriend? Here, this what you say."

<turns to the man>

“Old man, piss off, or me cut you. Test me, you see. You no first me kill or maim in cold blood.”

<fingers the adamantine kukri belt>

Intimidate check: 1d20 + 14 ⇒ (17) + 14 = 31

<turns to girl>

"Deaf and Blind, him shy, never know what to say. Him lucky have friend like Gittik, look out for him. So, you want get jiggy?"

Gittik wanders over to Beldan and the girl.

"Meh, you make codpiece too small, but you make Deaf and Blind look girly and skinny so maybe you OK. Hey you!" - he turns to the girl's "boyfriend" - "You f&ck off or me rip off legs and stuff in mouth to shut up. Deaf and Blind never get laid, give him chance."

kobold jugglers throwing chickens at eachother...

"Heehee! It no cruel, it funny!"

"OK with me. So, this book - why we no give it blood of people we no like? Anyway, book that talk good - reading so hard."

Sorry, been a heavy couple of days.

Continuing to attack my big friendly multi-armed giant.

RH kukri 1: 1d20 + 23 + 3 + 1 + 1 ⇒ (12) + 23 + 3 + 1 + 1 = 40, damage 1d3 + 10 + 3 + 1 ⇒ (3) + 10 + 3 + 1 = 17
RH kukri 2: 1d20 + 18 + 3 + 1 + 1 ⇒ (11) + 18 + 3 + 1 + 1 = 34, damage 1d3 + 10 + 3 + 1 ⇒ (3) + 10 + 3 + 1 = 17
RH kukri 3: 1d20 + 13 + 3 + 1 + 1 ⇒ (18) + 13 + 3 + 1 + 1 = 36, damage 1d3 + 10 + 3 + 1 ⇒ (2) + 10 + 3 + 1 = 16, crit confirm 1d20 + 13 + 3 + 1 + 1 ⇒ (3) + 13 + 3 + 1 + 1 = 21, extra damage 1d3 + 10 + 3 + 1 ⇒ (2) + 10 + 3 + 1 = 16
LH kukri 1: 1d20 + 21 + 3 + 1 + 1 ⇒ (3) + 21 + 3 + 1 + 1 = 29, damage 1d3 + 4 + 3 + 1 ⇒ (2) + 4 + 3 + 1 = 10 plus 1d6 ⇒ 1 electricity
LH kukri 2: 1d20 + 21 + 3 + 1 + 1 ⇒ (5) + 21 + 3 + 1 + 1 = 31, damage 1d3 + 4 + 3 + 1 ⇒ (3) + 4 + 3 + 1 = 11 plus 1d6 ⇒ 4 electricity

Doing what the man says. Roll to hit: 1d20 + 23 + 3 + 1 + 1 ⇒ (9) + 23 + 3 + 1 + 1 = 37, damage 1d3 + 10 + 3 + 1 ⇒ (1) + 10 + 3 + 1 = 15.

I'm really sorry, I still haven't drawn a map yet. Could someone suggest a target for me, preferably something much bigger than Gittik?

I'm afraid I haven't drawn a map yet, so please forgive the abstract actions. Rage on, move to the nearest enemy combatant and hit him (or her).

Roll to hit: 1d20 + 23 + 3 + 1 + 1 ⇒ (17) + 23 + 3 + 1 + 1 = 45, damage 1d3 + 10 + 3 + 1 ⇒ (3) + 10 + 3 + 1 = 17. Crit confirm: 1d20 + 23 + 3 + 1 + 1 ⇒ (20) + 23 + 3 + 1 + 1 = 48, extra damage 1d3 + 10 + 3 + 1 ⇒ (1) + 10 + 3 + 1 = 15.

OK, this isn't freaky.

"Meh, die easy."

Reflex save: 1d20 + 9 ⇒ (14) + 9 = 23

AoO: 1d20 + 23 ⇒ (20) + 23 = 43, damage 1d3 + 10 ⇒ (2) + 10 = 12, roll to confirm crit 1d20 + 23 ⇒ (19) + 23 = 42, extra damage on confirm 1d3 + 10 ⇒ (2) + 10 = 12

"YOU EAT BIG KNIFE, ELF THING!"

Always happy to oblige!

Move to A4 and RAGE ON!

1d20 + 23 ⇒ (7) + 23 = 30, damage 1d3 + 10 ⇒ (2) + 10 = 12

Perception = 1d20 + 8 ⇒ (3) + 8 = 11

"Me no like be nice to anyone."

"Heh! Deaf and Blind do it with dog!"

"Heh! What wrong with you? Deaf and Blind no like pussy?"

Gugs! And ... Gug riders!

This is why I love this game.

I'm going to wait for them to come up to me and then have at them.

Kukri attack: 1d20 + 23 ⇒ (14) + 23 = 37, damage 1d3 + 10 ⇒ (3) + 10 = 13

Gittik's got an action before they close the gap, and this round's action.

"Hee hee! Look at funny monkey people!"

Yeah, not much of an action, but it's all I can think of right now.

Fort save: 1d20 + 16 ⇒ (7) + 16 = 23.

"Oh, me feel tire. What happen? Why pointy cave thing scream, and have big eye, and mouth, and long sticky, and pull me up, and seem want eat me. All so strange. <yawn> Oh, why me so tire? Me no like be tire. Me no like pointy cave thing. Me no like pointy cave thing! ME NO LIKE POINTY CAVE THING! ME NO LIKE!

ME!

NO!

LIKE!

"RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!"

Rage on. Attempting to climb up the strand and attack my pointy cave thing.

Climb: 1d20 + 16 - 1 ⇒ (5) + 16 - 1 = 20
Attack: RH kukri: 1d20 + 23 - 1 ⇒ (17) + 23 - 1 = 39, roll to confirm crit 1d20 + 23 - 1 ⇒ (5) + 23 - 1 = 27, damage 1d3 + 10 - 1 ⇒ (3) + 10 - 1 = 12, plus 1d3 + 10 - 1 ⇒ (3) + 10 - 1 = 12 if crit confirmed

I suspect the adamantine kukri in his left hand will work better, but Gittik's not the thoughtful type.

Perception: 1d20 + 8 ⇒ (12) + 8 = 20

Hey, she sound horny!

"Maybe them no natural but them f@#%ing hurt!"

All levelled and ready to go. Greater Rage and an extra iterative attack, heh heh. By the way, someone needs to heal me or I might die before I get to level up.

EDIT: ah, ninja'ed by the healer.

Draw javelin and throw: 1d20 + 14 ⇒ (18) + 14 = 32, damage 1d4 + 6 ⇒ (4) + 6 = 10

After the last slaad attack, I was on precisely 0. I'm now on 6.

Fort save: 1d20 + 16 ⇒ (12) + 16 = 28

Enough talk of what we are doing after the fight - time to slice and dice (and hopefully live long enough to survive since I've taken a pasting). Full attack on laughing boy.

RH kukri 1: 1d20 + 18 + 2 + 2 + 1 ⇒ (17) + 18 + 2 + 2 + 1 = 40, damage 1d3 + 9 + 2 ⇒ (3) + 9 + 2 = 14, crit confirm 1d20 + 18 + 2 + 2 + 1 ⇒ (14) + 18 + 2 + 2 + 1 = 37, extra damage if confirmed 1d3 + 9 + 2 ⇒ (1) + 9 + 2 = 12
RH kukri 2 (haste): 1d20 + 18 + 2 + 2 + 1 ⇒ (14) + 18 + 2 + 2 + 1 = 37, damage 1d3 + 9 + 2 ⇒ (2) + 9 + 2 = 13
RH kukri 3: 1d20 + 13 + 2 + 2 + 1 ⇒ (20) + 13 + 2 + 2 + 1 = 38, damage 1d3 + 9 + 2 ⇒ (1) + 9 + 2 = 12, crit confirm 1d20 + 13 + 2 + 2 + 1 ⇒ (2) + 13 + 2 + 2 + 1 = 20, extra damage if confirmed 1d3 + 9 + 2 ⇒ (2) + 9 + 2 = 13
LH kukri 1: 1d20 + 16 + 2 + 2 + 1 ⇒ (1) + 16 + 2 + 2 + 1 = 22 = miss
LH kukri 2: 1d20 + 11 + 2 + 2 + 1 ⇒ (10) + 11 + 2 + 2 + 1 = 26, damage 1d3 + 5 + 2 ⇒ (3) + 5 + 2 = 10 plus 1d6 ⇒ 2 electricity

"GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!"

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!!!!"

Rage on. I suspect my little weapons will struggle to get through the DR of those statues, so I'm going for the tumble of my life you go through them and engage the slaadi. I don't know the DC, but it's the statue's CMD+5. I intend to move to J16 and make a single attack. Here goes.

1d20 + 14 ⇒ (11) + 14 = 25

Hmm. Well, if that works, I'll make a kukri attack on the charming chap in I-J/14-15.

Kukri: 1d20 + 20 + 1 + 2 ⇒ (2) + 20 + 1 + 2 = 25, damage 1d3 + 9 + 2 ⇒ (3) + 9 + 2 = 14

Save 1: 1d20 + 9 ⇒ (5) + 9 = 14
Save 2: 1d20 + 9 ⇒ (19) + 9 = 28
Save 3: 1d20 + 9 ⇒ (2) + 9 = 11

64 damage - ouchie!

"Heh, good tune."

<taps foot>

K20.

One big kid, maybe 12, tries to get bad with Pip; thinks he's a littler kid or something. Asks him if he wants to fight.

<punches kid>

(not to defend Pip, just because he wants a fight)

That's bad DM'ing, taking away our options. I feel railroaded to explore the mansion rather than just burn it down and kill what runs out.

Oso takes off his armour while the carcass is skinned and then grabs a sharp dagger and dives into the ribcage, eventually coming out bloody and smiling with a large bulette heart.

"We eat. Grow strong. Warrior meat."

With that the native priest takes a large bite of the raw heart and offers it to the rest of the party. Blood and stringy bits drip down his chin.

"You f$&@ing barbarian."

"AAAAAIIIIIEEEEE! THAT REALLY HURT! ME REALLY KILL YOU NOW! YOU DEAD, GIANT TURTLE MOLE!"

RH Attack 1: 1d20 + 20 + 2 + 1 ⇒ (6) + 20 + 2 + 1 = 29, damage 1d4 + 9 + 2 ⇒ (1) + 9 + 2 = 12,
RH Attack 2: 1d20 + 15 + 2 + 1 ⇒ (1) + 15 + 2 + 1 = 19 = miss,
RH Attack 3 (haste): 1d20 + 20 + 2 + 1 ⇒ (20) + 20 + 2 + 1 = 43, damage 1d4 + 9 + 2 ⇒ (2) + 9 + 2 = 13, crit confirm roll 1d20 + 20 + 2 + 1 ⇒ (10) + 20 + 2 + 1 = 33, extra damage on confirmation 1d4 + 9 + 2 ⇒ (1) + 9 + 2 = 12
LH Attack 1: 1d20 + 18 + 2 + 1 ⇒ (14) + 18 + 2 + 1 = 35, damage 1d4 + 5 + 2 ⇒ (4) + 5 + 2 = 11 plus 1d6 ⇒ 2 electricity,
LH Attack 2: 1d20 + 13 + 2 + 1 ⇒ (18) + 13 + 2 + 1 = 34, damage 1d4 + 5 + 2 ⇒ (3) + 5 + 2 = 10 plus 1d6 ⇒ 1 electricity, crit confirm 1d20 + 13 + 2 + 1 ⇒ (13) + 13 + 2 + 1 = 29, extra damage on confirmation 1d4 + 5 + 2 ⇒ (2) + 5 + 2 = 9

Thanks a f*@!ing bundle for that, Stiggy.

Sneaking with Beldan: 1d20 + 14 ⇒ (18) + 14 = 32

OK, bought a Cloak of Resistance +3 and an Amulet of Natural Armour +2 (total cost: 17,000gp). Also bought a royal outfit (extra-large codpiece version) and some very crass jewellery (1,000gp).

"Hey, you like new clothes? Me think look really cool. Me really like thing on knob, though maybe too small. What you think?"