Captain Admiral Colonel's page

gran rey de los mono wrote:

Longears Investigations Bureau wrote:

In other news, why does the ratty little shop down the road have two blue pipes leading out of the walls into a catering-sized tub of mayonnaise in their front yard?

Is it, as my colleague Ms. Marplears thinks, connected to a dehumidifier, or does it have a more sinister, mayonnaise-themed purpose?

The have a Ratatouille inspired marmite factory in there, and that's the output. The mayonnaise tub is to fool the cops.

I certainly hope they're not bootlegging Marmite. People have been immolated inside a giant bamboo goose in the town square in front of the Lady Mayoress, her consort, and the current steering committee of the local Rotary Club for similar offences against decency.

Yeah, you don't f@~+ with the rotary club!

Drejk wrote:

Tacticslion wrote:

Drejk wrote:

Woran wrote:

By the power of spreadsheets!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

We don't have enough books and movies where the day is saved by referringto a meticulously updated spreadsheet.

ECLIPSE CASTE REPRESENT

FLAWLESS SPREADSHEET FILLING METHODOLOGY!

Number Doublechecking Meditation
GLORIOUS DESKJOCKEY YANTRA!!!

...

I don't think that's what they actually meant when they promised epic stories of heroes coming back to set celestial bureacracy straight...

Kill 6 billion demons?

I'll gas up the Glitter Boy, it's gonna be a long night.

Tequila Sunrise wrote:

All I know is: Always start with Australia or South America in Risk!

CH’s unpopular opinion: Australia is a trap. 2 extra armies per turn, and you will use them defending Australia. Your offensive strategy is no better off for having it. South America is better.

Start wherever you want, I'll still crush you.

Darth Yesterday wrote:

Woran wrote:

Darth Yesterday wrote:

Woran wrote:

Freehold DM wrote:

Also, we do not wear clothes on this particular side of the force.

But do you have cookies?

No, pie.

Tempting.

What kind of pie?

All kinds.

C'mon. Work it. Seduce me.

I would think that my having the ability and confidence to make any pie successfully would be all the seduction you would need.

But, if it's necessary I suppose I can roll out some pie dough without my shirt on.

That's a 100 bucks per hour question, you know.

You told me it was a 101 dollar per hour question!

There's a cricket somewhere in the laundry room/pantry/office.

Of course you realize, this means war.

I am 40 today, a nice round number, and also the only age I'm likely to reach which rhymes with the word 'snorty'

It also rhymes with cavorty, which I'm hoping to get recognized as an actual word.

Happy Boxing Day!

captain yesterday wrote:

Nicknames?

Isn't your wife the General?

I don't really do nicknames.

You'll want to talk to Thanos, or Two Face, giving you 50/50 odds.

How many thermometers do I have to stick in my ears before I can harness thermonuclear super powers.

What if Night John is the evil twin?

And you'll notice they're never in the same place at once...

My cat died years ago. Did no-one read the second post?

Um, this is me you're talking about, I barely even skimmed your first post.

Why did Rex Banner catapult your cat now?

A verb is a word, of some sort.

That should be the name of an underwear line...

You're right, I do need to use more aliases.

Being a shithouse bard would be kinda fun...

*gratuitous third post in a row*

Doctor who now?

It's hard to believe no one had this one already.