Rita tries to bop Mogmurch, but her wounds felt better so she didn't. She thought about licking Poog. "I don't like the taste of poop. Not licking Poog."
She looks over the bodies for shinies, and snatches up Kettlehead's hat while kicking him a couple of times for good measure.
Chuffy immediately starts turning out pockets and bags on the dead goblins! "Dumb dumb heads! We sticks you good! Me wants shiny poker, cutter notnso good. Need little sticker, like stick! Those best, me sees lots of goblin carry pokers. Me wants."
The group of intrepid and now bloodied whelps tramp around kicking the two bodies and discussing the benefits of random licks. As someone kicks over Kettlehead, his rags jingle and clank with some hidden thing. Rita reaches over and pulls out several vials from his vest. They are covered in the cursed thought stealing writing!! *shudders of horror and revulsion*
There are 5 bottles, and for anyone daring enough to chance the horrible magic covering the outside of each vial, it has the tasty burn of grain alcohol, the spicy burn of peppermint, and the salty waste of sea water.
In addition to the horrible bottles, you find a small shortbow in need of a bowstring, a quiver of seven arrows, 2 dogslicers, a hard leather boot, and a salt shaker.
Rita shudders at the writing. She closes her eyes and takes a swig of the sea water bottle. "That's nasty but I feel good." She hands one to Poog. "You drink feel better.
Pooog grabs the bottle from Rita and takes a swig. "Oooh, that good!"
The team of unruly whelps shares out the potions, giggling and farting as the diluted potions work their magic on the beaten and bloody wounds.
With the goblin bully out of the way and the bleeding stopped, the whelps press onwards! The Cave of Darkfear and the end of your whelping awaits! Unfortunately, so too do the dark spirits that you must brave. Marching through the forest, you finally come to your destination. In the shade of gray cypress trunks, a sagging human-made cave squats on the muddy ground, overgrown with swamp brambles and leaning precariously to one side.
After much jostling and daring of each other, you finally build up the courage to enter the creepy and haunted shack. Trembling, you creep through the door and peer within. The interior is dark, but your goblin eyes pierce through the gloom revealing leaning and partially collapsed shelves, heaps of shattered pottery, a junk strewn table, and rusting animal traps. A partially mummified but mostly skeletal human body slumps against one wall- the fabled "Spirit of Darkfear"!
A broken off, cobweb strewn horsechopper juts from the corpse's chest. You recall the words of Loptop, that you have to wave your lucky frog before the Spirit, and sing out your Goblin Song!
Mogmurch whips out his lucky frog and enthusiastically begins to sing!
♫"Things go BOOM when Mogmurch throws,
Much more fun than using bows.
Sometimes where the BOOM BOOM blows
Is not my fault - That's how it goes."♫
Pooog stares with fascination at the mummified corpse, really tempted to go near to poke at it. But he decides to hold himself back, for now. As soon as Mogmurch completes his song, Pooog takes over, belting out a tuneless song of uncertain rhythm and tempo.
♫Poog say Zarongel is the best,
He help burn things and heal the rest.
Zarongel's favor makes Poog blessed.
And Poog also stab you with knife if you make fun of how he isn't good at riding animals.♫
Mogmurch takes a step forward and waves his frog around, singing his song. As soon as he finishes, Poog decides for a moment to sing to the corpse instead of molesting it and begins his song. As the crescendo of raucous noise reaches a climax though, some furry inhabitants take offence to the squealing and caterwauling taking place and jump out at the surprised whelps!!
Surprise Round:
The two grabby cats throw themselves out of the broken down cupboard they are hiding in, lurching towards the whelps! The surprise on both parties is too much for the grabby cats though, as they both miss!
Bold May Post:
Poog
Grabby Cats (raccoons!)
Rita
Chuffy
Mogmurch
Poog steps away. "Rita, I ask Zarongel help." He grabs his pendant of Zarongel's holy symbol, says, "Zarongel, help!" and lays his hand of Rita, granting her Zarongel's guidance.
Poog seeks the guidance of Zarongel to help Rita, while the Grabby Cats continue to bite and scratch at the whelps! Luckily they are very scared and ineffective!
Bold May Post:
Poog
Grabby Cats (raccoons!)
~Red
~Blue
Rita
Chuffy
Mogmurch
Mogmurch takes out his club and rushes around the table, flanking one of the grabby cats with Chuffy.
Just as Chuffy was about to dig out his toad and give it another solid lick before singing.... they are suddenly surprised! "Grabbycat!" He shouts in surprise. "No fair, grabbycats! It Chuffy job to make surprises! I sticks you for ruining Chuffy's fun!" In his anger, Chuffy misses the grabbycat and nearly sticks Mogmurch instead!
Poog whips out his (one and only) dart and flings it at the grabbycat. Turns out that Poog is just very good at hitting walls, but not so much grabbycats.
Rita pulls out her Dogslicer while she steps in front of the grabby cat. "I wanted to sing you stupid cat." She stabs at the creature.
Mogmurch draws out his weapon and gets ready for the fight, while chuffy begins carving holes in the floor around Rita's feet.
Meanwhile, Poog nearly skewers Mogmurch with a very poorly aimed dart!
The only one to land a blow so far is Rita, whose blade sinks right into the neck of her grabby cat, ending its days of grabbing!
The remaining grabby cat is in a panic as it is trapped between the two goblins with blades and darts flashing all around it! It lashes out with its teeth once more, sinking sharp teeth into Chuffy's leg!
Bold May Post:
Poog
Grabby Cats (raccoons!)
~Blue
Rita
Chuffy- AOO or 1 dmg
Mogmurch
Slamming his little club at the last Grabby Cat Mogmurch lets out a cackle of glee as it actually hits!
"Not as fun as 'splody, but me still like when bones go crunching!"
Rita moves up and stabs at the only grabby cat. "Ha me killed one already. Me big mean goblin."
Chuffy slices and dices but completely misses as the creature dives in at him.
Meanwhile, Rita and Mogmurch managed to bring the grabby cat down with near simultaneous strikes to the creatures neck!
Silence descends suddenly upon the small cabin, and Rita and Chuffy shove each other forwards to be the next to get the blessings of the Spirit of Darkfear.
Chuffy- 1 dmg
Poog stands are the back sulking. "Me help. Me make Rita hit good." he mutters under his breath, scuffing his feet along the ground as he follows behind Rita and Chuffy towards the mummified "Spirit of Darkfear".
Chuffy looks around the small space once more to make sure there are no more surprises with which to deal before he nudges Rita aside and pulls out his toad. "Me next, you too slow!" He holds his precious toad aloft and siiiiiings. "Chuffy’s face might make you sick,
But Chuffy’s knife is awful quick.
And if you are his stabby pick—
The knife goes in you, STICK STICK STICK!" The last 'stick' is punctuated by a mouthful of spittle!
Rita grumbles as she waits for her turn. "Not fair that I'm last. I killed all of the grabby cats."
She moves up and waves her toad at the Spirit of Darkfear. She sings.
"Reta chop and Reta bite."
"Reta slay and Reta fight."
"Reta stab and Reta smite"
"Reta kills it all just right."
The last two goblin whelps step forward to appease the Spirit of Darkfear and finish their Whelping Challenge! All it takes now is to survive the return trip to the rest of the tribe, and you will be full fledged members!!
The whelps all congratulate themselves on their fearless escapades and file out of the tiny hut to begin the trek home. You return to the road, and not far from where your battle with Kettlehead took place, you come upon a truly wondrous sight! A colorfully painted wagon sits half-sunken in a patch of foul-smelling mud. Abominable words decorate the side of the wagon along with paintings of potions and magic trinkets. Bottles, barrels, pots, and all manner of real potions and curios poke out from beneath the bulging canvas that covers the top of the wagon. A human woman clad in many different colors is at the front of the wagon, pulling on the dreaded mules harness and saying.. well.. something. None of you can understand her words, but it's clear that she is not happy with the creature as it stands in the middle of the road. She notices you approaching from behind the wagon along the road, and immediately her sour demeanor changes to one of excitement.. flashing dull unsharpened teeth that are just way too white! Her arms gesture grandly, and she steps closer to you still babbling in her unknown language.
Mogmurch quickly grabs the thieve's tools, and a tanglefoot bag.
He shows Rita first, then begrudgingly shows the others what he found.
"Look Rita, me mind shinys! Me guess rest of you can look too."
Poog stares the many potions, bottles, vials and what not sticking out of her caravan with undisguised greed.
"Me no like her. No like she show teeth. No like yappy yappy mouth. Can we take?" He points to the caravan, looking at the rest of the whelps.
The womans smile broadens.. if that is even possible.. as Poog gestures towards the loaded wagon. She reaches into the wagon and pulls out a flask, shaking it at the little goblins. Then she shakes her belt pouch, making the coins within jingle.
"Yes we take. It there, we take. Stupid Poog. No more ask stupid asking." Mogmurch says sharply.
He moves forward, as if to do as he just said and take something, when the woman approaches. Seeing his first tall folk, having no clue about half-elf or human appearance other than they are tall folk, he hisses, "Human!" and takes out one of his gourds
When she shakes her coin purse though and smiles her frighteningly white teeth, he pauses.
With a tilt of his head, he seems to understand. "She want trade." he says to the others.
-Posted with Wayfinder
Chuffy stares at all the goodie goodies with glee. He picks up one of the tindertwigs and his eyes widen. "Me hears about this. Me wants!" He quickly shoves them into his pockets and waves his dogslicer around dangerously. "No takes..." He leaves the rest of the shinies to the others. "Oh, King Bubble, the surprises we shall make with these..."
When they reach the cart stuck in the mud, Chuffy suddenly realizes his perfect opportunity for a wonderful surprise! He quickly sneaks off into the woods while the other dumb-dumb whelps talk and trade. Trade is for dummies. Chuffy has the greatest surprise planned. He can barely contain the mad cackle that seeks to burst free from his lips as he sneaks around to the far side of the caravan with a tindertwig in hand... 'King Bubble... this going to be so good... Shinytooth enjoy surprise too!'
Rita loads up on the goodies from the cavern. She grabs the other tanglefoot bag, and a couple of smoke sticks.
"What we have trade? I'm not giving my red rocks or my hat. I think we take and no trade." Rita shakes her head at the creepy smiling woman. She has her hand on her dogslicer, and make sure the evil horse thingies can't see her.
Mogmurch walks closer as if to trade his gourd, but then throws it instead at the strange woman.
Magical Maggie has no clue that one of the little goblins has disappeared from the group, and she continues to smile.. until Mogmurch approaches with the gourd. The smile falls off her face and turns into a snarl as she jingles her coins more vigorously, but quickly turns into a shriek of pain and words best not translated!
[spoiler=Initiative]
"Bold May Post"
Chuffy
Magical Maggie- 4 dmg
Rita
Poog
Mogmurch
Chuffy silently snickers as he creeps along the wood line towards the wagon, but narrows his eyes and vows to give Mogmurch a good sticking for ruining his surprise; however, his boils reassure him to keep on his task... the burning burn will be much more delightful when everyone can see it!
Chuffy slides closer through the overgrowth beside the road, while Maggie screams out curses. You don't quite know what "toe sucking weirdo" means, but it sounds like something not nice!
The half elf woman grabs a vial from her belt and downs it quickly before taking a step back.
"Bold May Post"
Chuffy
Magical Maggie- 4 dmg, Shield
Rita
Poog
Mogmurch
Mogmurch cackles wickedly as his fire continues to burn the manling, menacingly showing his sharp teeth as he does so. He quickly tosses a rock at her before shifting off to the side and out of the way of his more melee oriented companions.
Mogmurch is so amused by the flaming half elf, that he is unable to hit her with the rock that he throws!
"Bold May Post"
Chuffy
Magical Maggie- 6 dmg, Shield
Rita
Poog
Mogmurch
"We take! We take!" Poog screams with gusto. He looks longingly at all the treasure on her wagon, but more at the donkey. Maybe Poog ride that! He steps forward excitedly, draws out his dart (gift from Rita!!!) and flings it at the woman.
Chuffy can no longer contain his amusement and begins to chuckle to himself as he pulls out a vial of his pimple squeezings (he always knew it would come in handy one day...) and pours it all over the multi-colored wagon, his sharp teeth glistening as he grins. "Oh Chuffy, this will be best surprise ever!" As he prepares to light his tindertwig...
Rita moves up and waves her dogslicer at the human thing. "We want stuff you give." She yells in goblin of course.
Poog moves forward throwing a dart, but it only raises a bruise on the womans arm.
Chuffy sneaks up near the wagon and begins to pour his pimple squeezings over it, saturating the thick canvas cover.
Rita moves closer to the woman, screeching at her in goblin.. which of course the woman can't possibly understand!
Screaming in fear and pain as the ugly goblin urchins swarm over her and her wagon, the woman takes a step back while pulling something from her belt. She primes it, then tosses it at Rita. Hoping the explosion will cover her escape, she turns tail to run!
"Bold May Post"
Chuffy
Magical Maggie- 6 dmg, 1 NL, Shield
Rita
Poog
Mogmurch
Poog races down one side of the caravan, looking at disgust (even for a goblin) at what Chuffy is doing. He comes up the other side, behind the woman, and yells "BOO!"
Rita manages to jump back and only take a little of the damage from the bomb. She cackles. "Me want some of those! Give."
She steps up and swings at the ugly creature. She misses with her attack.
Poog races to cut off the womans escape while Rita tries to finish the woman off with her dogslicer. Unfortunately, she is distracted by the human ugliness and misses her shot!
"Bold May Post"
Chuffy
Magical Maggie- 6 dmg, 1 NL, Shield
Rita
Poog
Mogmurch
Mog takes out his club, as loathe as he is to do so, and moves to block the hummie's escape, cackling menacingly all the while. "Get it Rita!" He chatters in goblin!
Chuffy begins a full cackle as he lights the tindertwig and tossed it onto the oil...
Mog moves to hem in the woman and prevent her escape, while Chuffy uses a tintertwig to light up the caravan full of goods with a sudden Whoosh of flame and heat!
Maggie takes another step back while drawing a dagger from her belt. She thrust it at Mogmurch, drawing a deep line of blood from the goblin.
"Bold May Post"
Chuffy
Magical Maggie- 6 dmg, 1 NL, Shield
Rita- 2 dmg
Poog
Mogmurch- 4 dmg
"I wanted stuff. Who did that? Rita yells as she moves up, and stabs at the human.
"Ouch!" Mogmurch exclaims when slashed. But his eyes soon light up when he sees the warm glow and then the sudden *WHOOSH!* of flame come from the caravan.
"Thank you Fire! Thank you sooo much!"
In his excitement, he swings his club wildly as he cheers on the lovely fire, possibly even hitting the hummie in front of him.
"Oh YES! BIG SPLODY TIME SOON!"
Maggie gives a squeal of pain and revulsion as the goblin whelps-no-more swarm over her, stabbing with grubby knives and torching her worldly belongings. She tries to slash out at Rita with her dagger as the gob moves past her, but the dagger slashes through only air in the womans panic.
"Bold May Post"
Chuffy
Magical Maggie- 8 dmg, 1 NL, Shield
Rita- 2 dmg
Poog
Mogmurch- 4 dmg
"Bad Chuffy! Me want shiny bottles!"
Torn between chasing away the irritating screaming hoo-man and grabbing as much loot from the burning caravan as possible, he suddenly thought of something. Figuring it is still the canvas that is burning first, he starts untying the canvas covering the wagon.