(So this is my first post, and I'm a little intimidated by the sheer number of categories, so I posted here since it seemed closest, I apologize if this is in the wrong forum section)
So I'm designing a character for a game set in Golarion, and I want him to seem organic and reasonably well-fleshed-out. Unfortunately, to do so I had to give him a ton of backstory to rationalize his personality. So please read and give me feedback, Thanks!
Davster Droverson is a Chaotic Good Half-Orc Alchemist.
Davster Droverson was born in Kaer Maga, and was immediately thrown out into the gutters. He was found by a pair of Halflings who worked at the Church of Asmodeus in Tarheel Promenade. They decided to adopt him to see if they could turn a profit from the raising of a child.
Raised in the Church of Asmodeus, Davster showed absolutely no interest in becoming a contract-maker or lawyer. He was also too compassionate and caring to worship Asmodeus in any way beyond lip service, something that would have led to a messy death if his parents weren't influential enough to keep him around.
On his 13th birthday, his parents sat him down and revealed that they had kept a tab on every purchase they had made for him, since the night they adopted him. Clothes, toys, food, and birthday presents were all included, and they expected him to pay it off before he could move on and leave the temple. Daunted by the thousand-gold-plus debt, Davster began searching for work as an apprentice.
Eventually he found a job working under a hedge wizard in the Oriat district, who specialized in potions and medical aid. The wizard noticed Davster's knack for chemicals, and having the sturdy orcish physique to withstand the more...volitile concoctions, the wizard began to teach Davster more advanced medicinal techniques and alchemical formulae.
He saved for years, but was unable to make a dent in the ever-increasing debt. desparately, he sought the perfect combination of chemicals to make a marketable potion. Working far to late one night, he stumbled on a combination that could delay hangovers, negate pain, acted as a sedative, and could even allow hallucinations and lucid dreams (Polypurpose Panacea. Our DM wasn't planning on having it exist in-game, but he allowed my character to "invent" it). The resulting combination sold like hotcakes, and Davster and his master made money hand over fist.
Making enough money to overcome the debt, Davster realized that he had no goal anymore; surmounting his debt to his parents was his driving force. Realizing he had no goals, Davster fell into gang life, where his medic skills proved extremely useful to the Skin Artists gang. Working his way through the ranks of the gang, he became close to not only the leader of the group, a devious dwarf named Ulder, but also the legendary tattoo artist Bull, famous for only granting his tattoos to those who had proved themselves in some way.
Eager to earn one of Bull's tattoos, he started taking the most dangerous jobs, and trying risky stunts to earn Bull's favor. However, it wasn't until his gang got into a serious war with another gang from another district that he really had to examine his way of life. Tensions ran high for the first few weeks, before exploding into full-on guerilla warfare. Many on both sides were injured or killed, and despite his loyalties to the Skin Artists, Davster couldn't leave others to die, and secretly saved the lives of many of the rival gang, not to mention the lives of those neutral parties caught with crossfire.
When the Skin Artists discovered Davster's secret, they threatened to remove his tattoos (painfully) unless he stopped aiding the enemy. Standing for his ideals, Davster refused to allow others to die in a needless war. Davster would have met a messy and painful death if Bull hadn't stepped in, protecting him. Bull claimed this act of bravery was enough to earn his respect, and one of his tattoos, an intricate design that covers his entire back, neck, and much of his face.
Fresh with new ink, Davster left the Skin Artists to become a medic. Unfortunately, the Skin Artists had other plans. Ulder tracked Davster down in his home, and nearly killed him before Davster overcame and slew his former friend. Realizing he couldn’t stay in the city or risk gruesome death, he left the city, with his possessions.
Davster is focused on his goals. He measures his success in the wealth he has accumulated, and almost never turns down an opportunity for profit, only refusing if innocents are hurt, or there is needless suffering. Every battle is a business venture and every ally is an investment. Even serious tragedies, like shipwrecks and cave-ins, are nothing more than an opportunity for financial gain. Outside of this, he is talkative, gregarious, and friendly. Davster never judges someone based on their backgrounds, and treats worshippers of Asmodeus and Halflings as close friends or relatives.
So there we go. Dang that is long, but like I said, I made it complex and detailed so I could explain his eccentric personality. Please let me know what you think!
(I think they usually move these type of posts to the advice forum, but I haven't really figured out where everything goes yet either.)
Well, you're certainly giving your DM a lot to work with. Honestly, for my tastes, it's probably a little *too* complicated, but that's me.
Without knowing the setup of your game or anything, I'd probably just get rid of the halfling aspect (though I guess that does let you invent the panacea, make tons of money, and still have little starting wealth).
My suggestion (and again, this is just me, and I like slightly more streamlined backgrounds; I don't think you have to change anything if you and your DM are fine with this story) would probably be that he starts in the gang, but finds he's just not suited to that lifestyle.
He flees, with a death threat from his former gang on him, and eventually hooks on with the wizard (who perhaps he saved during his final gang activity? Even if the master is meant to be higher-level, he might have been caught unawares...). He then uses the money to buy his freedom from the gang.
Well, as motteditor mentioned above, it would possibly be a bit too complicated for youre DM... But on the other hand, it could also make it a bit more fun in some way... So if youre DM is up for a challenge, then its absolutely perfect since if alot of work (by youre DM to put it into the storyline itself) is put into it, it might make the story more fun for you, and maybe everyone else.
But whats also a bit important is, how old is he after he left the gang? My suggestion would be that hes something like 25 or older. That ould also make it possible for you (if you want to, and its not too much work)to put more work into it.
2nd. suggestion: Put a little more work into what happened while he was an apprentince, since that parts is playing a huge role when it comes to his skills.
3rd suggestion: Maybe you could like let him go with one of his tattoos (like a big one on a leg or something) being 'removed' from his body. Just to create a little drama, not just in the storyline, but also for something for youre, and youre friends characters to talk about around the campfire...
But besides my suggestions, I really like this background for youre character. I can see that you most likely had an idea of youre character, and have put alot of work into making it all fit together (In this case: Using adobtion thing to make it have a good alignment, using the dept on getting the alchemsit rank, using the alchemist to get into gang, and finally a gang story to finish up.)
But nothing wrong with that! If done right (as I think it has been in tis case) it should be so much better than just making it all smooth...
The background is interesting, and I disagree with motteditor's suggestion to drop the Halfling and Admodeus aspect, I think that sort of foundational background is fantastic.
I would instead alter then gang-aspect of it. Since Poly-purpose Panacea can not only be used for medical purposes but also narcotic hallucinogen, it would make more sense that the gangs were trying to fight over him for control over the chemical as opposed to him being actively apart of the gang.
That way, he can better help both sides of the conflict medically, and allows the GM to better limit Poly-purpose Panacea by saying that this gang-warfare resulted in a widespread banning of the substance, or that your character decides to no longer make it for commercial purposes because of the harm it caused.
The events with Bull, and attempted assassinations on the character's life can still be worked in, but instead of him killing a former friend, he just decides that staying in that city would only endanger himself and others needlessly.
That's just my 2c. I feel like this back story ain't too complex, and that your GM has a couple of potentially fun adventure hooks to work of your character.
In Kaer Maga, of all places, why was he tossed into the gutters? By whom? That doesn't jive, to me, with the city of strangers. Otherwise, lots of flavor in there.
Ladies of the evening generally don't have time to raise kids. Especially ones that are the sons of orcs who don't tip well.
And THATS wy I like Kaer Maga. There's so much personality to the city. Perfect place to start a character in.