Quiet today
Well, there goes the neighborhood!
*grumble*
Untimely storm means I can't (well, stricktly speaking I could but I don't really want to face those streams of water) go and get groceries...
It's Saturday evening. I don't really have much of food in the fridge that I would like to turn into dinner. Yeah, I could make a stew of beans, sweet potato, and carrot, but I am veering strongly toward more meat-based diet...
The "fun" part? The shops are closed tomorrow...
I'll probably end going for a pizza or a big burger for a meal tomorrow.
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It's always terrifying to get to know medical practitioners personally.
Impus Major was supposed to go out to visit one of his friends from DVC today. Except... she's a nurse practitioner in a hospital and got pricked with a needle yesterday. So today is isolation, tests, and paperwork to make sure it's nothing worse.
Which has got to be utterly terrifying for her, no matter what was on the needle.
(And notice I'm not tirading about a nurse getting pricked with a needle. I've never known anyone who doesn't occasionally get minor injuries on the job, from cooks burning or cutting their fingers to correction officers getting punched in the face by convicts they're "controlling". I'm not surprised this stuff happens, nor that it requires a large amount of paperwork. I just feel sorry for the young woman and her emotional distress.)
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Fingers crossed for super soldier serum
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Today was another episode of Hapless Limey DIY Time, which thankfully went off without anything catching on fire or personal injuries being inflicted, and was also soundtracked by the next door neighbour blasting out 'Hungry Eyes' by Eric Carmen and whistling along to the saxophone solo.
Also, ALL (DE) finds the sight of me wearing dirty shorts and doing construction work (badly) to be 'hot'. Hum.
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The good: I managed to get groceries when there was lull in rain.
The bad: das called and was annoying as hell. I wonder what neighbors might thought of my yelling at the phone.
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I sang along with the 80s songs in the grocery store today...
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I got the college kid I trained two years ago who absolutely hates pavers to come in this morning and help lay pavers.
Even he was shocked I'd roped him into it (he even said if it was anyone else he would have said no).
So I guess I should probably raise my charisma score in my profile.
It turns out leading by example is the best way to get the most out of people. Who knew!
It turns out leading by example is the best way to get the most out of people. Who knew!
. . . Hmmmm.
I guess that means my Cha score isn't just low enough for a negative modifier, but the actual number itself is a negative value.
EDIT: Unless my coworkers are just that lousy . . . .
Yeah I get that all the time when I walk in on a Friday or Saturday night. I'm a big fella and she is a small Filipino lady who is too nice for her own good.
Hotel management likes putting nice ones on second shift. I guess it's good for business. I keep saying that we should have two people here on 2nd shift for our busy nights. It gets to hectic for one person. I always feel bad for our second shift she looks so done whenever I come in.
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Last night I had a chance to see A Quiet Place 2 in a reserved theater. For free.
I chose not to.
GothBard says I chose wisely.
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Yesterday GothBard was complaining about the dietary supplements industry.
I thought this XKCD put it beautifully.
Our daughter noticed our older dog has a b#&$*!~& that sticks out a little.
So she grabbed it.
I washed her hands like she was Adrien Monk trying to impress the inventor of bleach, so no worries.
But still, I never in my life thought I'd use the phrase "and that's when my daughter grabbed my dog by the a#!#&$%."
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Our daughter noticed our older dog has a b*#!@!** that sticks out a little.
So she grabbed it.
I washed her hands like she was Adrien Monk trying to impress the inventor of bleach, so no worries.
But still, I never in my life thought I'd use the phrase "and that's when my daughter grabbed my dog by the a&%&*~#."
Trust me, you'll find yourself saying s%** you never imagined yourself saying for the rest of your life.
That's just good parenting.
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It's always terrifying to get to know medical practitioners personally.
Impus Major was supposed to go out to visit one of his friends from DVC today. Except... she's a nurse practitioner in a hospital and got pricked with a needle yesterday. So today is isolation, tests, and paperwork to make sure it's nothing worse.
Which has got to be utterly terrifying for her, no matter what was on the needle.
(And notice I'm not tirading about a nurse getting pricked with a needle. I've never known anyone who doesn't occasionally get minor injuries on the job, from cooks burning or cutting their fingers to correction officers getting punched in the face by convicts they're "controlling". I'm not surprised this stuff happens, nor that it requires a large amount of paperwork. I just feel sorry for the young woman and her emotional distress.)
My mom, who is a nurse, once accidentally gave herself a tiny cut with a used surgical scalpel. A whole procedure was involved after that. It is not fun.
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Had a great time building a basketball hoop with Tiny T-Rex.
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I finally got the 559 classroom photos in my drive winnowed down to a tenth of that and submitted them for consideration in the yearbook, which was my final administrative deliverable for the school year. And submitted my completed EOY checklist electronically from over 2000 miles away.
Also, the windows on Miz Daisy's (i.e. my Mother-in-law's) house FINALLY got installed yesterday, without undue drama, during a break in the rains... again, even though we were over 2000 miles away.
Life feels magical.
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Our daughter noticed our older dog has a b&*$!#%% that sticks out a little.
So she grabbed it.
I washed her hands like she was Adrien Monk trying to impress the inventor of bleach, so no worries.
But still, I never in my life thought I'd use the phrase "and that's when my daughter grabbed my dog by the a&%*+~!."
Be glad it was just the dog.
My mom used to have a friend who was a race car driver. He said that his three year old walked into the bathroom once while he was brushing his teeth after his morning shower, grabbed his Johnson, and said, "I got your root."
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Wow.
Wow.
Yeah, parenting has been way more surprising than expected...and I expected it to be ridiculously surprising
Also, I wish I spoilered my anecdote because it might have grossed people out, and now it's too late, and for that I apologize.
o_O
Which I have no idea why you should be using this time to make your enemies suffer with fire!
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And it's finally come to this.
As a responsible father, I freely give advice to my kids. One of their friends has started coming to me about once a month to talk to me for an hour or two. At least one other friend has stopped by to ask me about things that were bothering him.
So when one of their young female friends started having relationship issues, they all told her to talk to me, and she set up an "appointment" for later today.
Yes. A 54-year-old male brought up in a house with two brothers and two male friends, who in turn raised two sons and all their male friends, has been recruited to provide relationship advice to a 17-year-old young woman.
Awkward? Oh, yeah...
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And it's finally come to this.
As a responsible father, I freely give advice to my kids. One of their friends has started coming to me about once a month to talk to me for an hour or two. At least one other friend has stopped by to ask me about things that were bothering him.
So when one of their young female friends started having relationship issues, they all told her to talk to me, and she set up an "appointment" for later today.
Yes. A 54-year-old male brought up in a house with two brothers and two male friends, who in turn raised two sons and all their male friends, has been recruited to provide relationship advice to a 17-year-old young woman.
Awkward? Oh, yeah...
Ha! Welcome to my world!
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Ugh. Work. Ugh.
Ha! Welcome to my world!And it's finally come to this.
As a responsible father, I freely give advice to my kids. One of their friends has started coming to me about once a month to talk to me for an hour or two. At least one other friend has stopped by to ask me about things that were bothering him.
So when one of their young female friends started having relationship issues, they all told her to talk to me, and she set up an "appointment" for later today.
Yes. A 54-year-old male brought up in a house with two brothers and two male friends, who in turn raised two sons and all their male friends, has been recruited to provide relationship advice to a 17-year-old young woman.
Awkward? Oh, yeah...
Hey, you HAVE a daughter! Over here it's the blind leading the blind.
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Hey, you HAVE a daughter! Over here it's the blind leading the blind.Ha! Welcome to my world!And it's finally come to this.
As a responsible father, I freely give advice to my kids. One of their friends has started coming to me about once a month to talk to me for an hour or two. At least one other friend has stopped by to ask me about things that were bothering him.
So when one of their young female friends started having relationship issues, they all told her to talk to me, and she set up an "appointment" for later today.
Yes. A 54-year-old male brought up in a house with two brothers and two male friends, who in turn raised two sons and all their male friends, has been recruited to provide relationship advice to a 17-year-old young woman.
Awkward? Oh, yeah...
Yes, but I have 7 brothers and all my cousins are male, so just because I have a daughter doesn't mean I know what I'm doing.
I found that, for the most part, a teen girl's relationship issues get way less complicated when her step-dad's crossbow gets pulled out as a preemptive warning.
The problem is the "for the most part" clause. The one that defies the pattern is the one you don't want a teen girl to be involved with at all.
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I think the dad with a shotgun (or other weapon) trope is cheesy. I get it. I really do. But it just is...so overdone.
The Vagrant Toddler starts martial arts as young as the classes will let her in. So far 4 is the youngest I've found.
We decided it's not an option. She can choose a different style or school, but she will know how to cripple a f%#%er if they touch her without permission.
Then, when she breaks a guy's bones in three places, I can just tell her how proud I am of her, rather than be incarcerated for assaulting her date after the fact.
I may not be able to guarantee my daughter's untouched, but I will do my best to guarantee all her interactions are consential. And I feel the best way to do that is make sure she knows how to and that she has ample permission to physically destroy anyone who crosses her comfort zone.
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I think the dad with a shotgun (or other weapon) trope is cheesy. I get it. I really do. But it just is...so overdone.
The Vagrant Toddler starts martial arts as young as the classes will let her in. So far 4 is the youngest I've found.
We decided it's not an option. She can choose a different style or school, but she will know how to cripple a f@&~er if they touch her without permission.
Then, when she breaks a guy's bones in three places, I can just tell her how proud I am of her, rather than be incarcerated for assaulting her date after the fact.
I wasn't the one that pulled it out to "threaten" him. That was all her.
EDIT: Part of her ritual the first time she brought any boy to the house was to park him in the living room while she fetched the crossbow. She gave the speech herself. I didn't have anything to do with it, other than own the crossbow.
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I think the dad with a shotgun (or other weapon) trope is cheesy. I get it. I really do. But it just is...so overdone.
The Vagrant Toddler starts martial arts as young as the classes will let her in. So far 4 is the youngest I've found.
We decided it's not an option. She can choose a different style or school, but she will know how to cripple a f&@~er if they touch her without permission.
Then, when she breaks a guy's bones in three places, I can just tell her how proud I am of her, rather than be incarcerated for assaulting her date after the fact.
I may not be able to guarantee my daughter's untouched, but I will do my best to guarantee all her interactions are consential. And I feel the best way to do that is make sure she knows how to and that she has ample permission to physically destroy anyone who crosses her comfort zone.
Why do you think I'm teaching Crookshanks how to use heavy tools.
Also, I can run super fast (I caught our adult and still young beagle in a dead run once) and I have multiple implements nearby that I keep incredibly sharp, and I don't really talk a lot, so I'm probably the scariest dad out there.
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Oh thank goodness!
Impus Minor just updated me and young woman is trying to become emancipated and move out from her parents' house and she needs financial advice on how much it's going to cost, what to plan for, etc.
I have a whole table already set up for MY kids, and I'm likely to force them to listen in.
Yes, financial management! THIS I can have a conversation about!!!
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The General (to Crookshanks): So, are you on the kid crew this year?
Me: We prefer to call them "The Expendables" or "Readily Available Organs".
As a scientist, it's reassuring when numbers align.
I used the "30% rule" (spend no more than 30% of your gross income on housing) to determine that if the young woman wants to live in the "idealized life" of a two-bedroom apartment for two around here, she'll need a household income of $88k/year.
And just last month I looked up Albany's median household income: $82k/year.
(I'm a big believer in, "Here's your ideal world. Now, considering that you're 17 years old and thus unlikely to get a 40 hour a week, $22/hour job to bring in half the income for that household, let's take a look at alternatives.")
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Wrong Rec Room Much?
NobodysHome: Hello.
Robot Voice: This is Amazon calling about a recent $493.20 charge to your Amazon account. Press 1 to speak to our cyber security department.
It would have been *SO* much less pathetic if I hadn't been looking at my account activity when the call came in, and if they hadn't used "cyber" security. NO financial institution calls it "cyber" security, because they're not cool enough to.
Wrong Rec Room Much?
NobodysHome: Hello.
Robot Voice: This is Amazon calling about a recent $493.20 charge to your Amazon account. Press 1 to speak to our cyber security department.It would have been *SO* much less pathetic if I hadn't been looking at my account activity when the call came in, and if they hadn't used "cyber" security.
Speak of the bad excellent timing...
NO financial institution calls it "cyber" security, because they're not cool enough to.
They might do that around here. Not sure, I don't deal with them much.
I just learned what an urumi is, and now am so sad I can't find any videos of people wielding the multiple blade versions. I find single blade training videos, and multiple blade photos, but no multi blade videos.
It's a flexible blade that's a half-whip-half-sword, and apparently comes with upwards of 32(!) blades in some iterations.
That's what I want to see. Someone wielding a 32 blade urumi. In action. Without hurting themselves...which is probably the hardest part.
My knee is sore and back is also on the sore side.
But at least I'm working by myself tomorrow, as I don't have enough stuff to keep the kids busy, and they're scared of using power tools (which is weird to me as you couldn't give me a power tool fast enough when I was their age).