|
A Dwarf walks into a tavern and says "Hey everybody, I heard the funniest Elf joke!"
And one of the people at the bar turned around revealing himself as an elf and replied, "Now wait a second, before you start telling that Elf Joke there's something you ought to know. I'm an 11th level monk with a 22 DEX -- and I'm an elf.
"And this fella next to me, he's a 15th level Druid and HE'S and Elf, too.
"And that fella yonder is a 19th level wizard and HE'S and Elf, too!!! ....
"So, now that you know all that, you sure you want to tell that Elf Joke?!
And the Dwarf replied -- Not if I have to explain it three times!
So a new salesperson starts work at a 'marital aid' shop at the Katapesh Nightstalls. The boss leaves for a while in search of some 'spices' and leaves the novice clerk alone.
Before a long an Elven maiden walks in, looks around and says "I'll take that darkwood one" - makes her purchase, and leaves.
Soon after a Human maiden walks in, looks around and says "I'll take that mithril one!" - makes her purchase, and leaves.
After some time a Dwarf woman walks in, looks around, grumbles for a while and pokes about the shop disappointedly. Soon however there is an 'AHA!'. She walks to the counter and says, "I'll take this tartan one", makes her purchase, and leaves.
Eventually the boss comes back and enquires about how the trade has been.
"Not bad" says the salesperson, "I've sold a Darkwood, a Mithril, and my Thermos"
"Dwarf monks are so awesome, they can make unarmed attacks with their breath."
*Fixed it for you.*
=====
A half-orc, a human, an elf, and a dwarf are all having a mug of ale outside. The flies are very thick that day.
A fly lands in the half-orc's drink. He strugs and drinks the ale, fly and all.
A fly lands in the human's drink. He plucks the fly out and continues to drink.
A fly lands in the elf's drink. The elf, disdainfully pushs the drink aside.
A fly lands in the dwarf's drink. The dwarf grabs the fly and screams at it, "Spit it back out ya bastard!"
Ah lahk this thread.