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Compliments of the season,
Forgive my indignation if this message comes to you as a surprise and may offend your personality for contacting you without your prior consent and writing through this channel. I got your contact from the professional data base found in the internet yahoo tourist search when I was searching for a foreign reliable partner. I assured of your capability and reliability to champion this business opportunity.After series of prayers and fasting, I was divinely directed to contact you among other names found in the data base yahoo tourist search. I believe that god has a way of helping who is in need. My name is Mr. Abduldrame the bill and exchange (assistant) manager of the bank of Africa Ouagadougou Burkina Faso .
Do not take this transaction to be a joke because it is my life. Dear friend, I know that this mail will come to you as a surprise. I am the bill and exchange manager in bank of Africa . I hope that you will not expose or betray this trust and confident that I am about to repose on you for the mutual benefit of our both families.
I need your urgent assistance in transferring the sum of $11.3 million immediately to your account. The money has been dormant for many years in our bank here without any body coming for the claim. So get back to me as soon as possible for more details.
Thanks Mr Abduldrame
1. I do not forgive you for contacting me. Your assumption that I will forgive you offends my personality more than your nonconsensual emailing.
2. I am confused about what you mean by a "professional data base found in the internet yahoo tourist search."
3. I am confused about why you are so assured of my capability and reliability and even more confused about your supposed business opportunity which you have not even mentioned until now.
4. Generally speaking, fasting is a bad way to diet. You should definitely contact a doctor before fasting. It just isn't healthy!
5. I'm thinking you better start praying that one of the other names you were directed to contact will get back to you, cause I'm not!
6. If you are going to assume I will help you because you reference religion, you should capitalize "god"
7. Finally! Your name, and your title (which sounds ridiculous!) Also, I assume you are going to start talking about a large amount of money soon... Please be advised, I don't want to discuss lots of money with the *Assistant* manager.
8. You're right, this isn't a joke, it's a scam... and scams /= jokes Also, I am really sorry that scamming people is your life.
9. I am not your friend. Much less your "dear" friend
10. This is not a surprise, I get 10-20 similar emails every day
11. We had no trust here. to begin with... and it appears your hope in my confidentiality regarding this matter are currently being dashed.
12. My cats are my family and they don't want your mutual benefit because it implies the benefit goes both ways, and they are too selfish to want to help other people.
13. 11.3 million! OMG! How could such a huge amount of money possibly be a scam!
14. *hint* if no one is claiming the money.... maybe YOU should! That way you don't have to split the profits with anyone else! (and with 11.3 million, I'm pretty sure you could take it and set up shop somewhere else without (too much) fear of being tracked down)
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*gives Sara a hug* Don't worry, there is a special level of hell for those people. And remember, they already gave the original spammer what was coming to him. :)
I do find it slightly humorous that the next spam email I clicked on to delete contained the following greeting from a Ms. Marry Martins:
"Forgive my indignation if this message comes to you as a surprise and may
offend your personality for contacting you without your prior consent and
writing through this channel. I got your contact from a professional
database found in internet while searching for a reliable and honest
person that will be an anointed steward in a vision very dear to me"
I think I will from now on call myself "Sara Marie, The Anointed Customer Steward"
:P
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For your enjoyment. I read that a couple years ago, and it was really fascinating.
Anyway, when I worked in banking, I saw a few people lose a lot of money on these things (generally more sophisticated than those lame mass emails, I will admit).
people will stop sending them when people stop falling for them.
I like that they're indignant that you weren't expecting they're email.
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Here are the two most interesting stories I found at my old job. (Spoilered for length...)
I asked him where he had gotten them. He said he got them from his employer. I then asked him if he was expected to forward the funds from the money orders to any other parties once he had cashed them. His face just fell as the realization hit him.
It turns out he had been approached based on his resume on a popular job-search website. He was contacted by a "foreign company" to be a correspondent for their US transactions. They told him to cash the money orders, keep 10% for himself as a commission, and forward the rest to another holding account. He was so desperate for work that he couldn't see that it was too good to be true. Fortunately I saved him a lot of money that day.
Then he tells her that he's in a bit of a bind. He's getting an insurance payout, but his ex-wife has a lien on his account, so if he deposits it, most of it will go to her. He asks this woman if she can cash the check for him and then send him the money via Western Union, which would be untraceable. She agrees and does it.
The guy wasn't even in the US. She never heard from him again. The check was a forgery, and it cost this woman her life savings of approximately $30,000.
It's enough to make one lose faith in humanity, right there.
Actually, some of these fraudsters maintain false bank websites too.
Oooh, a website! If there's a website, it must be real.
I know. I still laugh when people try to tell me Paizo is a real company.Actually, some of these fraudsters maintain false bank websites too.Oooh, a website! If there's a website, it must be real.
Curses.
It appears someone has finally seen through this massive charade that I have perpetrated.
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people will stop sending them when people stop falling for them.This.
Except that people are still falling for it. Older people seem to be the most susceptible. For some reason they don't understand why someone would lie to them.
Working in banking myself, we get training on this all the time. We save our people quite a bit of money because they seem to be rather trusting. The big one right now is still the ebay/craigslist stuff --
You are selling something, and someone wins the bid. They send you a check. It's for a lot more than the cost was. You check with them. They say "oh, I'm sorry. Just cash it in and send me a cashier's check for the difference along with the item." The initial check was bad so now you are out the difference as well as the item sold.
I would say that we still get a person come in at least once a quarter that thinks the Nigerian scam (or similar) is for real.
I love the misspellings and the poor grammar in these emails. I think that they really try hard to find the right places to put them in to make them more believable.
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Actually, some of these fraudsters maintain false bank websites too.Oooh, a website! If there's a website, it must be real.
Most of these scams are massive mailings saying something happened that requires the account holder to verify information. It is easy enough to "steal" banners and symbols off of legitimate sites, and put them on a bogus one to help make it look legitimate.
A couple things to keep in mind.
1) NEVER put important information on an unencrypted site. The address should say "https:". If it doesn't have the "s" it isn't secure. There should also be a "lock" showing somewhere on your browser.
2) NEVER assume that a link in your email to a financial institution is accurate. ALWAYS go directly to your financial institution and then look there to find what the email was about. If it truly was important, it will be easy to find.
3) When in doubt, ALWAYS call the financial institution to verify the information. NEVER use the phone number found in the email (assuming there was one).
4) Your financial institution ALWAYS already has your information. They do not need you to verify it or to let them know what your account number is. The only time that I can think of a financial institution needing to verify your information is if you contact them, before they give out anything about your account, they will need to verify it is really you they are talking to. They will not contact you demanding that you verify information. If they do, ask for a name, get a phone number if you want (but don't use that), call your institution with the phone number that you know and proceed from there.
You'd think that this stuff was common sense -- but it apparently isn't. Otherwise it wouldn't be so widespread.
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*gives Sara a hug* Don't worry, there is a special level of hell for those people. And remember, they already gave the original spammer what was coming to him. :)
This is true and one of my friends is going to that special hell. He is a software developer and his company he works at has wrote several spam programs he calls them. He himself as wrote at least three of them.
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This is true and one of my friends is going to that special hell. He is a software developer and his company he works at has wrote several spam programs he calls them. He himself as wrote at least three of them.
I wonder what his eternal punishment will be.
Even better, he included a phone number in his email!
Ooo, telemarketers then?
When will these people stop with the emails!
Dear Sara Marie,
May I recommend that you move to The Petal District of Absalom? There are some quite nice villas on the market right now, whose former owners have just been exiled from Absalom for the old illusionary gold piece con, and I'm certain that you could represent your current employers' interests much more effectively by being their personal liaison officer to the Grand Council and the Pathfinder Society. Several of Absalom's prominent citizens, in fact, would be delighted to have someone on the scene with whom they could have a personal word about coverage (or lack thereof) regarding themselves in products your employers have recently put out.
Warning! Ask a Succubus is in this particular circumstance required by the rather flexible rules of planar tempters and temptresses to make clear that the column will not be held responsible to any assumptions made or promises inferred by readers. If it's not signed in some kind of blood and doesn't involve a trip to make an oath on a sacred altar of Calistria, it doesn't count.