I was looking over the races and their sizes and I got to thinking.
It's not impossible for a human to be over 8 feet tall. In the real world this is associated with a pituitary problem. In a fantasy world, a Large human could possibly have a giant for a mother and a human for a father. Or any other race for that matter could be taller than the norm for other reasons.
Of course to allow this right out would be a problem. So I'm thinking of allowing a feat that allows an increase in size category; with all the penalties and benefits associated with such.
The opposite would be to allow a character to start one size category smaller than normal (small humans, tiny gnomes & halflings). Should allowing this be worth gaining an extra feat if it costs one to increase your size category?
Two problems.
If the person has a Giant for a parent, they would probably be a Half Giant (like Half orc or Half elf). There's already racial writeups for such a thing in 3.5e.
It's an interesting idea, but I think that being Large is worth more than feat by itself.
Something else to consider... being Large is more than just really tall. Giants have bone and muscle structure that can support the additional weight they have. A very tall Human isn't built that way, and usually have problems physically because of it (as per the wikipedia entry, circulatory and skeletal problems).
So while a Giant might only be 50% taller than a human, they weigh like 2 tons (thicker, stronger bones, muscles, skin, etc).
Second issue with your small choice, being small isn't necessarily a detriment. Bonuses to attack, defense, and stealth offset the lower carrying capacity and "possibly" movement (note that ONLY the gnome and halfling have lowered speeds, virtually every other small race moves at 30').
So I would definitely NOT give a feat for being small. Many a rogue have chosen small races specifically for the bonuses involved. I wouldn't want a Human Rogue picking small stature and get an EXTRA feat over top of that...
*Addition*
Adding rules for "gigantism" in your game might be along the lines of adding rules for "autism". While there may be benefits, there's potential for opening social concerns that some people might not feel comfortable with in their gaming.
Just something to consider.
Regarding the larger humans: try looking at the Jotunbrud feat in Races of Faerun for inspiration, as it allows the human to be considered larger for certain purposes. You can allow a character who is already physically large for his race (say, a 6'10" human) to take it and gain at least certain benefits.
For smaller humans: you might let them exist and gain the benefits of a smaller size but then penalize them with a lower Strength score to compensate for the additional perks size small grants them.
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Should allowing this be worth gaining an extra feat if it costs one to increase your size category?
No way. I play a fine-sized character. I didn't receive any free feats for doing so, but rather a significant level adjustment, as there are many advantages to being fine-sized.
BTW, there are traits in Iron Heroes that allow you to be considered one size smaller or bigger (so the tall human could just take the "Tall" trait, rather than wasting a feat).
Just a FYI: As for size and density, the H-cubed rule should apply. For example, if you take a 6-sided die that is 1 inch in every measurement, and then reproduce it exactly the same but now twice as tall, so every measurement is 2 inches, the weight will increase 8x. 2x2x2, or 2 cubed.
Same with people. If you take a 6' tall man who weighs 200 pounds and double his height, you are also doubling his width (shoulder to shoulder, hip to hip, etc.) and doubling his depth (nose to back of head, belly button to spine, etc.). So his new weight wouldn't double to 400 pounds, it would increase to 1600 pounds (200 x 2cubed).
A 50% height increase should, by the same rule, accompany a weight increase of 3.375x, so enlarging a 6' 200 pound man to 9' tall would increase his weight to 675 pounds.
As for doing this with just a feat, larger or smaller, I should think that it would be substantially more significant than that. Melee types who get large, and non-melee types who get small, will each gain far far more benefits than a mere feat should bestow.