Ask My Second Darkness Character a Question!

[Xuttah]

Hi folks,

I'm posting this in the Off-topic area too since it gets lots of traffic and I'm trying to turn this around quickly.

I do this little comic book style chronicle of my D&D group's Second Darkness campaign. There's no chronicle this week due to our summer gaming schecule, so I am taking reader's questions to do a filler comic, like what R.K. Milholland does with his Something Positive webcomic (actually, I'm totally ripping off his idea, but imitation is the most sincere form of flattery, right?).

The question I choose will be in the filler comic. Please don't ask anything that would violate the messageboard policies. Be prepared for a snarky answer (Zim's a sarcastic bastard). :)

Oh, and go read Something Positive. It's a great comic. A little PG-13 most of the time, so consider yourself warned!

Deadline 2pm EDT :)

[Xuttah]

Guess I'm asking myself a question then, eh? ;)

[JollyRoger]

Xuttah wrote:

Guess I'm asking myself a question then, eh? ;)

How *do* you solve a problem like Maria?

[Kobold Catgirl]

Cake or Pie? ;)

[Mairkurion {tm}]

What...is your favorite color?

Spoiler:

We're such a helpful bunch...

[DoveArrow]

Wouldn't you like to be a Pepper too?

Spoiler:

Yes we are.

[Tarren Dei]

DoveArrow wrote:

Wouldn't you like to be a Pepper too?

What is Pepper a doctor of?

[Xuttah]

JollyRoger wrote:

How *do* you solve a problem like Maria?

A:Crossbow bolt to the back.

[Xuttah]

Kobold Cleaver wrote:

Cake or Pie? ;)

A: Neither. Your decadent surface food is full of unnatural ingredients and preservatives. I prefer earwig honey snaps.

[Xuttah]

Mairkurion {tm} wrote:

What...is your favorite color?

Darkvision grey.

[Xuttah]

DoveArrow wrote:

Wouldn't you like to be a Pepper too?

A: No! I prefer Dr. Gelatinous Cube or Cavern Dew.

[Xuttah]

These would have been useful a week ago. :P

Next time there's a pause in the action I'll keep this thread in mind. :)

[CourtFool]

Drizzt Do'Urden: Misunderstood Heathcliff or Wesley Crusher in Black?

[CourtFool]

Fighters: Why So Unfun?

[CourtFool]

Charisma: Dump Stat De Jure or Opportunity For Role Play?

[CourtFool]

Goblins vs. Kobolds

[CourtFool]

Tieflings: The New Ninja?

[CourtFool]

Was professor Henry Louis Gates Jr.'s arrest racially motivated?

[CourtFool]

Does a stitch in time really save nine?

[CourtFool]

Tell us about your relationship with your mother.

[Turin the Mad]

What is your favorite stalctite? Stalagmite?

And remember, a Roper a day keeps the doctor away.

[CourtFool]

Will Netanyahu find support from America's religious right?

[CourtFool]

Can there be peace beyond the line?

[CourtFool]

At what level do you plan to retire?

[CourtFool]

How would you feel if you uncovered that you were birthed from a character optimization thread?

[CourtFool]

Wish they all could be Chelaxian girls?

[CourtFool]

Are you now, or have you ever been, a member of the communist party?

[CourtFool]

How do you synthesize a mentholated alkaloid?

[CourtFool]

When will my ship come in?

[CourtFool]

Are we there yet?

[CourtFool]

What was your pet's name when you were young?

[CourtFool]

What do you fear the most?

[CourtFool]

Who was your first love?

[CourtFool]

Cats or dogs?

[CourtFool]

How do you like to unwind after leveling up?

[Xuttah]

CourtFool wrote:

Fighters: Why So Unfun?

A: The human fighter I adventure with is plenty of fun. He's always doing something whacky like plunging out of second story windows or shouting incoherantly about processed meats. I figure is a combination of repeated blows to the head and all the 80 proof potions of cure light wounds he drinks. Mammals, folks. Am I right?

[Xuttah]

CourtFool wrote:

Goblins vs. Kobolds

Kobolds FTW, as they say in Riddleport. Goblins make for great junk food too. They often pre-cook themselves given half the chance too.

[Xuttah]

CourtFool wrote:

Does a stitch in time really save nine?

Depends on if it's an arterial bleeder or not.

[Xuttah]

CourtFool wrote:

Tell us about your relationship with your mother.

We kobolds don't care about such things. Not because we're not sentimental, but because we're cheap and don't like to shell out for gifts on mother's day.

[Xuttah]

CourtFool wrote:

At what level do you plan to retire?

Just like my cousing Meepo: The one that ends with a chomping sound and a squeak.

[Xuttah]

CourtFool wrote:

Wish they all could be Chelaxian girls?

From experience, I'd have to say no. Too tough and stringy. Varisians are much tastier.

[Xuttah]

CourtFool wrote:

Are you now, or have you ever been, a member of the communist party?

No, just an adventuring party.

[Xuttah]

CourtFool wrote:

How do you synthesize a mentholated alkaloid?

Fabricate or lesser creation should do.

[Xuttah]

CourtFool wrote:

When will my ship come in?

Let us wait on the pier for it together. Is that it there? Look closer! Closer! (push) Nope, guess not.

[Xuttah]

CourtFool wrote:

Are we there yet?

Axun.

[Xuttah]

CourtFool wrote:

What was your pet's name when you were young?

I once had a giant cave cricket named Smunsouee. I raised it from a grub and eventually it became grub. Circle of life.

[Xuttah]

CourtFool wrote:

What do you fear the most?

With kobolds, it's easier to ask us to list things we're not afraid of. In my case, I'm completely unfearless.

[Xuttah]

CourtFool wrote:

Who was your first love?

Power

[Xuttah]

CourtFool wrote:

Cats or dogs?

Is there some way of coming up with a magical chimeric beast that combines the tastiest parts of both?

[Xuttah]

CourtFool wrote:

How do you like to unwind after leveling up?

Stripping the bodies while whistling a jaunty tune, followed by a frosty mug of Cavern Dew and a bowl of Cool Ranch Crickets.