An introduction

[Callous Jack]

Wow, must be a starving mantis...

[Jeremy Mcgillan]

*tucks himself into a ball and just manages to roll away from the giant Mantis, and runs like hell tripping a Kobold with a sword along the way to appease the Mantis*

[Callous Jack]

*kicks kobold while he's down*

[Gavgoyle]

Mantis smmich! Extra crunchy!

[Callous Jack]

Aren't Thri-Kreen and and Praying Manti the same thing?

[J.R. Farrington, Esq.]

Daigle wrote:

It's going to be terribly disappointing if I ever meet you and you don't look like your avatar. I can get over folks not being kobolds, dragons, frost giants, wolves and whatnot, but daft proper gentlemen still exist somewhere. Ah've seen's 'em. Rilly!

Daigle wrote:

Oh my! Where!?

Daigle wrote:

Sammich!

Just for the record, whatever Daigle posts I read aloud to myself in the voice of Zorack from Space Ghost Coast to Coast.

I can't help it.

[Gavgoyle]

But... but... I'm the Lone Mantis of the Apocolypse...

[The Jade]

I'm late to the introduction.

Pleasure to cybermeet you, Jacob.

[Jacob Burgess]

The Jade wrote:

I'm late to the introduction.

Pleasure to cybermeet you, Jacob.

*wakes up briefly*

Capital!

*waggles finger a bit*

*drifts back to the comforting numbness of sleep*

*begins to float*

*harumphs, dreamily*

[Kobold Catgirl]

*Gets tripped*
*Gets kicked*
*Blows whistle*

[The Now Flying Dire Lemmings]

CHARGE!!!!!

[The Eldritch Mr. Shiny]

The Jade wrote:

I'm late to the introduction.

Pleasure to cybermeet you, Jacob.

I! WANT! ROOM SERVICE!!!!

[Adam Daigle]

J.R. Farrington, Esq. wrote:

Just for the record, whatever Daigle posts I read aloud to myself in the voice of Zorack from Space Ghost Coast to Coast.

I can't help it.

I'm actually more like Brak minus the brain damage.

When I read your posts I hear the voice of my friend Jason who shares your surname.

[Charles Evans 25]

Mr. Burgess; When you were recruited into the Paizo branch of The illuminati* did they tell you about the secret ceremony every summer equinox (obviously those only happen when The Stars Are Right) involving the giant killer trilobite and the three newest recruits to the Paizo ranks?

* For those who don't believe Paizo are actually a secret organisation with an agenda of global domination ask yourslves:
(1) Why else would they employ the people that they do.
(2) Would Lisa really give up a career in Marine Biology for anything less than world domination?
(3) Why won't anyone admit that PST actually stands for Paizo Standard Time?

[Adam Daigle]

That's gorgeous, Charles.

[Charles Evans 25]

Daigle wrote:

That's gorgeous, Charles.

As an occasional geologist, I have a certain interest in sales of the aformentioned giant killer trilobites, I probably ought to disclose.

In the unlikely event of anyone for whom it's not already too late taking my warnings seriously, I also have a battery of geological specimens to throw at them if they come after me (which by the casual observer could be easily mistaken for pebbles or lumps of rock).

[Callous Jack]

The Dire Lemmings wrote:

CHARGE!!!!!

*whistles and picks up a stick*

Here boys, come get it!

*Throws stick off a cliff*

[The Now Flying Dire Lemmings]

Callous Jack wrote:

The Dire Lemmings wrote:

CHARGE!!!!!

*whistles and picks up a stick*

Here boys, come get it!

*Throws stick off a cliff*

We not intersted in stick. We come to kill.

Why warwoof charging over cliff?
Nevmind. CHARGE!!!!!!!!!!

[Callous Jack]

*kicks KC again since he didn't get up*

[Lisa Stevens]

Evil Genius wrote:

I've always wondered who did the store blog... Now I know!

*head explodes*

I did all of the blogs for the last four years up until last week, when Jacob took over. So put your head back together. :)

-Lisa

[Kruelaid]

Jacob Burgess wrote:

I am he what writes the Store Blog.

So what's with the food metaphor in the Gazetteer blog post?

You on a diet or something?

[Callous Jack]

Kruelaid wrote:

Jacob Burgess wrote:

I am he what writes the Store Blog.

So what's with the food metaphor in the Gazetteer blog post?

You on a diet or something?

I don't think so, he seems to be a big fan of pancakes...

[niel]

faugh- He eats pancakes with apples in them. A proper gent sitting fully dressed in a flying bathub wearing a monocle, I can accept. But tainting a pile of peaceful pancakes with fruit? That's not acceptable behavior for a gentleman.

[Kobold Catgirl]

Callous Jack wrote:

*kicks KC again since he didn't get up*

Ow. Where'd I put my whistle?!

[Callous Jack]

I think you swallowed it.

[Kobold Catgirl]

Think again!
*Blows whistle*

[The Now Flying Dire Lemmings]

CHARGE!!!!

[Charles Evans 25]

Kobold Cleaver:
Very good, but can you stop them from flying if someone decides to cast gust of wind (for example- not that I would) on them?

Edit:
Apologies, Mr. Burgess, but threadjacks like this happen on these at least partially crazy Paizo boards.

[Kobold Catgirl]

Charles Evans 25 wrote:

Kobold Cleaver:

Very good, but can you stop them from flying if someone decides to cast gust of wind (for example- not that I would) on them?

The answer?

*Lemmings blown off cliff*
No. Levitate! Levitate! Levitate! Garldammit!!!

[Heathansson]

That's like wasting a fireball on Wile. E. Coyote.

[Arctaris]

So surreal...

[Callous Jack]

Kobold Cleaver wrote:

Charles Evans 25 wrote:

Kobold Cleaver:

Very good, but can you stop them from flying if someone decides to cast gust of wind (for example- not that I would) on them?

The answer?

*Lemmings blown off cliff*
No. Levitate! Levitate! Levitate! Garldammit!!!

Hahahha! No lemmings!

*kicks KC again*

[Kobold Catgirl]

Callous Jack wrote:

Kobold Cleaver wrote:

Charles Evans 25 wrote:

Kobold Cleaver:

Very good, but can you stop them from flying if someone decides to cast gust of wind (for example- not that I would) on them?

The answer?

*Lemmings blown off cliff*
No. Levitate! Levitate! Levitate! Garldammit!!!

Hahahha! No lemmings!

*kicks KC again*

*Blows special whistle*

[The Now Flying Dire Lemmings]

Grrr.....CHARGE!!!!

[Callous Jack]

Agh! Flying Lemmings! Where are those damn flying monkeys when you need them?

[The Flying Monkeys]

You called

[Callous Jack]

I have a vermin problem.

[Kobold Catgirl]

Callous Jack wrote:

I have a vermin problem.

*Blows extra-big whistle* Your 'vermin problem' just a whole lot worse.

[Callous Jack]

What? Why? Another kobold?

[The Flying Monkeys]

OOOOOOOOO AAAAAAAAHHH AAAAAAAAAHHHH AAAAAAAAHHH
*Flings Poop at lemmings then swings in and pounds them*
*Flings poo at Kobold Cleaver*

[Jacob Burgess]

*The steam powered, bronzed bathtub, The Derringer floats over battle field*

... battle ...

*Wakes up briefly, adjusts monocle, looks down*

*mumbles*

... looks a proper row ...

*begins to hum and work the steam powered contraption, kicking it repeatedly*

... tea you blasted... thing... war demands tea ...

*floats out over cliff*

*drifts off to sleep*

*Derringer produces a cup of Earl Grey*

*Harumphs sleepily*

*floats away into the sunset*

[The Now Flying Dire Lemmings]

The Flying Monkeys wrote:

OOOOOOOOO AAAAAAAAHHH AAAAAAAAAHHHH AAAAAAAAHHH

*Flings Poop at lemmings then swings in and pounds them*
*Flings poo at Kobold Cleaver*

Grr! Grr! Grrr!

*Charge puny flying monkey and gives him a pounding*