I was thinking about dwarves, and I had a sudden insight: Kobolds should rule the mines.
Dwarves are best at smithing, sure, but kobolds are the best when it comes to mining. Plus, kobolds are less cliche. So I thought: How to explain why dwarves, a warlike race, would let the kobolds get ahold of the mining points? And I realized the answer: They didn't.
But the Minersguild, a cunning group of kobold trapmakers and aristocrats, managed to buy one major mine, and after that, it was all over for the dwarves. The kobolds, hiring a few good smiths, drove the dwarves out of business until, one by one, they were forced to sell their mines.
But then the dwarves realized their mistake: They had no easy income. Now that the kobolds owned all the mines, there was no call for the dwarves' services. Eventually, they were forced to get jobs at the kobold mines, or lose their homes.
Feedback welcome.
|
You're theory is, unfortunately, based on two poor assumptions:
1. That just because dwarves are better at smithing that they suck at mining. Any race who has such an expertise with metals would, in the course of the development of their civilization, also become good at getting to such metals. Otherwise, they would never have gotten to where they are.
2. That kobolds are good at anything other than (a) making traps, (b) making yipping noises, and (c) being anything other than small pot holes on an adventuring party's road to higher levels.
You're theory is, unfortunately, based on two poor assumptions:
1. That just because dwarves are better at smithing that they suck at mining. Any race who has such an expertise with metals would, in the course of the development of their civilization, also become good at getting to such metals. Otherwise, they would never have gotten to where they are.
2. That kobolds are good at anything other than (a) making traps, (b) making yipping noises, and (c) being anything other than small pot holes on an adventuring party's road to higher levels.
I didn't say that dwarves sucked at mining, I said that kobolds are better at it. A commonly-accepted fact.
You're theory is, unfortunately, based on two poor assumptions:
1. That just because dwarves are better at smithing that they suck at mining. Any race who has such an expertise with metals would, in the course of the development of their civilization, also become good at getting to such metals. Otherwise, they would never have gotten to where they are.
2. That kobolds are good at anything other than (a) making traps, (b) making yipping noises, and (c) being anything other than small pot holes on an adventuring party's road to higher levels.
Bah. You're just jealous.
small pot holes on an adventuring party's road to higher levels.
Why stop with the mines? I love the idea of Kobolds running loose in the sewers of some large city, the ultimate scavengers...
This is also the point someone usually brings up "Tucker's Kobolds" --
I think the idea of kobold aristocrats is novel -- I have had a kobold consort kick out the ruler, take over, collect minor magic items, and later cultivate giant bees to have something to trade for other minor magic items from the nearby Keep -- but I've never had an aristocrat.
If you are ever bored, check out the archives at doomlounge.org for the adventures of Del Rook, former kobold ruler, now sorcerer/side-kick/comic relief! We are always looking for fellow writers....
Just realized searching through the entire Doom Lounge website for Del Rook stories wasn't exactly the most user friendly way to go!
If interested, try this link for one of my favorite Del Rook stories...
Go to Games of Choice.
I didn't say that dwarves sucked at mining, I said that kobolds are better at it. A commonly-accepted fact.See! There goes that yipping noise again. Kobolds better miners as a commonly accepted fact? Only by delusional kobolds.
We have a +2 bonus on profession (mining), you fool.
|
You're theory is, unfortunately, based on two poor assumptions:
1. That just because dwarves are better at smithing that they suck at mining. Any race who has such an expertise with metals would, in the course of the development of their civilization, also become good at getting to such metals. Otherwise, they would never have gotten to where they are.
2. That kobolds are good at anything other than (a) making traps, (b) making yipping noises, and (c) being anything other than small pot holes on an adventuring party's road to higher levels.
2{d} shape-changing into smrfs.
You're theory is, unfortunately, based on two poor assumptions:
1. That just because dwarves are better at smithing that they suck at mining. Any race who has such an expertise with metals would, in the course of the development of their civilization, also become good at getting to such metals. Otherwise, they would never have gotten to where they are.
2. That kobolds are good at anything other than (a) making traps, (b) making yipping noises, and (c) being anything other than small pot holes on an adventuring party's road to higher levels.
Truer words have yet to be spoken! ~grins~
Quick! Evacuate thread! This is not a drill! Women and children first! Release the dire lemmings!
You called, boss?
Why stop with the mines? I love the idea of Kobolds running loose in the sewers of some large city, the ultimate scavengers...
Well if we are dealing with commonly accepted facts I say Gully Dwarves trump Kobolds when it comes to determining the ultimate scavenger.
Well if we are dealing with commonly accepted facts I say Gully Dwarves trump Kobolds when it comes to determining the ultimate scavenger.Hmm....I wonder if kobolds evolved from gully dwarves? That would explain a lot.
...
Oh, and Fireball.
Well if we are dealing with commonly accepted facts I say Gully Dwarves trump Kobolds when it comes to determining the ultimate scavenger.Hmm....I wonder if kobolds evolved from gully dwarves? That would explain a lot....
** spoiler omitted **
Oh, and Fireball.
Huh? What? Hey, something tickled.
Stupid DR.
You're assuming he can read? He is a Kobold after all.
I was wondering why my Kobold friend is not very effective with Scribe Scroll...
And as for Kobolds evolving from Gully Dwarves, the Kobolds I know would not share a snack-time kitten with Gully Dwarves!
Baaaaa.
You're assuming he can read? He is a Kobold after all.I was wondering why my Kobold friend is not very effective with Scribe Scroll...
And as for Kobolds evolving from Gully Dwarves, the Kobolds I know would not share a snack-time kitten with Gully Dwarves!
No, stupid dwarves is get their own lunch!
Kobolds will rule everyplace, eventually.
All we need is a few superdelegates, and to infiltrate the Electoral College.
|
|
I think another inappropriate assumption is that kobolds are doing mining proper... i.e. all of the mineral extraction and business that we think of associated with mining. They are basically glorified tunnelers. They can burrow to and fro like no one's business, and have a well trapped warren, but it's obvious that they are generally not possessed of the mental accumen that it would take to run a full-fledged gold, tin, salt, or bubblewrap ore mining operation.
And as for Kobolds evolving from Gully Dwarves, the Kobolds I know would not share a snack-time kitten with Gully Dwarves!
Well to be fair the Gully Dwarves won't share either. They'll hide deep in the middle of a garbage pit to keep their tasty treat away from the prying eyes of thieves who might take it away from them.
can they even properly hold a pick?? or even lift one?? Or do they just use those elongated noses of theres. HAHAHA
That's it, I am going to quote the MM just to prove that we are best at mining.
'Racial Skills: A kobold character has a +2 racial bonus on Craft (trapmaking), Profession (miner), and Search checks.'
So there. This huge threadjack is all Aberzombie's fault, by the way.
|
|
That's it, I am going to quote the MM just to prove that we are best at mining.
'Racial Skills: A kobold character has a +2 racial bonus on Craft (trapmaking), Profession (miner), and Search checks.'
Oooh, a whole +2 on their profession checks. Yep, that sure does make them "the best". The best at having delusions of granduer maybe.
|
|
That's it, I am going to quote the MM just to prove that we are best at mining.
'Racial Skills: A kobold character has a +2 racial bonus on Craft (trapmaking), Profession (miner), and Search checks.'
I think in the errata they clarified it as Profession (Tunnel-Grubber)
But don't worry, I still love kobolds The bottom of the food chain needs some love, too.
That's it, I am going to quote the MM just to prove that we are best at mining.
'Racial Skills: A kobold character has a +2 racial bonus on Craft (trapmaking), Profession (miner), and Search checks.'I think in the errata they clarified it as Profession (Tunnel-Grubber)
But don't worry, I still love kobolds The bottom of the food chain needs some love, too.
You're a little bug. Rats eat bugs. Cats eat rats. Kobolds eat cats.
You might want to amend your statement a bit.That's it, I am going to quote the MM just to prove that we are best at mining.
'Racial Skills: A kobold character has a +2 racial bonus on Craft (trapmaking), Profession (miner), and Search checks.'Oooh, a whole +2 on their profession checks. Yep, that sure does make them "the best". The best at having delusions of granduer maybe.
Show me the book that says zombies get a racial +2 on profession (mining)checks, and I'll give you a cookie.
Good luck with that.|
|
You're a little bug. Rats eat bugs. Cats eat rats. Kobolds eat cats.
You might want to amend your statement a bit.
Silly kobold. I forget... do you have racial neg. to you INT or are you just a special case? (that's rhetorical, actually). I'm a 6 1/2 foot tall bug and four usable arms... that's one to crush your rat, one to grab you cat and give it a poisonous bite, one to grab and hold you, and one to shove my gythka far enough up your backside to stretch you to a decent height.
You might want to just run away. Or tunnel, you're good at it.
With all joking aside we should take a serious look at what Kobolds are good at, I have put togeather a short list of a Kobolds uses.
RED DRAGON TAVERN AND INN
Squished Kobold with Maple, Blueberry or Strawberry Syrup.
Short Stack 6cp
Tall Stack 9cp
Rack of Kobold Ribs 2gp
Kobold Sausage with 2 Eggs and Toast 12cp
Kobold Wings your choice of Hot and Spicy or Sweet and Tangy 25cp
Kobold Stew 5cp
Country Fried Kobold Steak w/ Mashed Potatoes 15cp
Kobold Brain Soup 3gp (2 week advance order is required due to the number of Kobold brains need to make single serving)
Kobold Pie 2cp per slice 10cp whole pie
Kobold Club Sandwich 8cp
Kobold Kabobs 5 sticks 10cp
With all joking aside we should take a serious look at what Kobolds are good at, I have put together a short list of a Kobolds uses.
** spoiler omitted **
Sigh. I suppose that it's only fair that I do the same for dragons. Here is a list of what red dragons are good at:
Please leave the rats out of this? We just try to get by. ^ ^
I for one will side with Kobold Cleaver. The simple fact that Kobold have a racial bonus to a Profession check is grounds enough to say that they are more than capable at said check.
Drarves have stonecunning yes, but where's their racial mining bonus?
Plus
-Kurocyn
|
|
Here are some more quotes from the Monster Manual Kobold entry:
"Kobolds are short, reptilian humanoids with cowardly and sadistic tendencies."
"Kobolds speak Draconic with a voice that sounds like that of a yapping dog."
"Kobolds like to attack with overwhelming odds – at least two to one – or trickery; should the odds fall below this threshold, they usually flee."
"I also noticed that they get a -4 to Strength and a -2 to Constitution."
Why/how is a brainless husk of a creature making fun of something that isn't rotting where it stands? This puzzles me.
-Kurocyn
Though owls are often rated highly when it comes to intelligence, they tend to be far less heavily armed than just about everyone else, so a specific comparison, species to species, is generally not regarded as a very good idea.
"Ju Ju zombies?" lol... All that comes to mind is a broken and bile-riden heap of worthless flesh scraping along a bob-sled course in a broken down sled. Quite ammusing actually.
I will stand by the Kobold and his mining regardless of zombies that can outsmart a rat. Congrats on that by the way. lol...
-Kurocyn
Sigh. I suppose that it's only fair that I do the same for dragons. Here is a list of what red dragons are good at:** spoiler omitted **With all joking aside we should take a serious look at what Kobolds are good at, I have put together a short list of a Kobolds uses.
** spoiler omitted **
And as the explosive runes go off, the Red Dragon farts,and the flames spread killing all Kobold in the area. BBQ Kobold anyone
...You are an erudite rat, those books you carry must work via osmosis.
He's discovered my secret! *quickly stashes the Osmotic Tomes of Ratus Ratus Learnalotus away in his warren*
Mine! >.O
...and the flames spread killing all Kobold in the area...
But Explosive Runes is a force effect. How does one spread fire when it's not there?
-Kurocyn
...You are an erudite rat, those books you carry must work via osmosis.He's discovered my secret! *quickly stashes the Osmotic Tomes of Ratus Ratus Learnalotus away in his warren*
Mine! >.O
...and the flames spread killing all Kobold in the area...But Explosive Runes is a force effect. How does one spread fire when it's not there?
-Kurocyn
2 different explinations, 1st the obvious, even Kobolds use tourchs, Second realy bad pot of Kobold Chille at the Inn