4e. The whole thing reeks of Satanism
D&D is satan's game. Everyone knows that.
Threadjacked
Let it Be
Threadjacked
Let it Be
Sorry, just having fun.
I heard WotC is having open casting call for on air personalities to interview iconic D&D monsters for there webcasts at the 4th edition studios.
I heard that Inn Fighting is the new way that combat is going to be resolved in 4E.
I heard that if you read the 4E players handbook backwords you will summon a imp to do your bidding.
I heard that you can order a custom miniature based off your online miniature for only $80.00!
As for "crazy rumors", I hear they've edited "Rule 0":
"The DM is always right unless a majority of players agree that she is just being a Mean Old Cranky Pants who needs a Time Out."
This is the cover of Knights of the Dinner Table 95.
I think it sums up"Rule 0" perfectly
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I heard that the latest aberration is going to be the bastard love-child of a beholder and an owlbear. They haven't decided on a name yet, although the leading contender is bowlholder.
Would that bowl-holder be holding a bowl of 'penultimate balls'?
Give yourself a point for getting that reference...
In 4E there will be no demons or devils because they are too scary and evil and corrupt young minds.
Instead there will be 'Naughty Angels' who play tricks on people.
The bard class has also been replaced with 'Boy Bands'.
Although to be honest that is rather scary.
I would like to take this opportunity to apologise on behalf of the UK for the Spice Girls and Take That (Nobbie Williams in particular).
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Rumor has it that 'points of light' will form pictures if you connect them on a map.
Rumor also has it that there are two elf races - blooded elves and dusk elves, but they're totally not a WoW ripoff. Honest.
Further rumors suggest that the only playable race is really humans, and that all the classic demihuman races are monstrous.
4.5 is scheduled to be released in 2009 once everyone has bought the first round of 4.0 books.
Kobolds are listed as an exotic weapon.
Characters can now spend Awesome Points (formerly Action Points) to AutoKill every monster in a thousand miles and instantly level up from it.
Mini collectible PHBs will be sold by the dozen, with different covers, rules, sizes and prices (some of them edible, others blank but gold platted).
They will cost only 5$ apiece (60$ for a display), and police size will be 1/4. They will edit a new set every 6 months.
The uncommon will feature "TeleTubbies Kobolds - Cover"
"DemoBuffycon" will be the rarest one, and should trade in conventions at some 5000$ !
Some will be able to send msn messages.
No dice. You must use the D&D (tm) number generator on their web site, or buy the $55 dollar meatspace version, for all officialrandom number generation.
To ensure this, most weapons are a d7.75
Would that bowl-holder be holding a bowl of 'penultimate balls'?Give yourself a point for getting that reference...
I would, but I'm kinda scared of bringing out the trolls
Chuck Norris is way to old to appeal to the target audience. I know for a fact* they're going with Jackie Chan instead** spoiler omitted **
No way. Norris is included in the new core pantheon. They *are* marketing this game towards neck-bearded MMORPG fanatics, after all. Making internet fads and "ironic" humor a big part of the 4e rules is important to show those young people that WoTC is tuned in to them and the way they game.
I heard that they are going to release D&D 5 edition in 2010. They have already started working on it based on the fact that they deliberatly wrote broken rules text into 4.0 as a nod to Microsoft.
I heard that since WotC is trying to attract younger players they are bringing out a line of D&D toddlers edition. To be included with their new D&D clothing line (ages 1-8) and their new D&D plush baby toys.
I heard that if you buy PHB 1-4, DMG 1-4 and MM 1-4 then any characters you make can start at 4th level instead of first. It will be supported by the rules and be sooo AWESOME!!!!!!
WotC will be coming out with a line of official 4e clothing and accessories, which will allow wearers to claim special abilities for their PCs:
The 4e Pointy Hat gives extra blast power to mages.
4e Fuzzy Slippers give +4 Stealth
The 4e Wristwatch gives +4 to Bluff
The 4e Belt keeps pants from drooping.
4e is gonna be super nifty!
WotC will be coming out with a line of official 4e clothing and accessories, which will allow wearers to claim special abilities for their PCs:
The 4e Pointy Hat gives extra blast power to mages.
4e Fuzzy Slippers give +4 Stealth
The 4e Wristwatch gives +4 to Bluff
The 4e Belt keeps pants from drooping.
4e is gonna be super nifty!
Will they have a computer link to DI?
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I heard that if you buy PHB 1-4, DMG 1-4 and MM 1-4 then any characters you make can start at 4th level instead of first. It will be supported by the rules and be sooo AWESOME!!!!!!
AND the Dungeon Mastery kinda person guy must only throw hoards upon hoards of lowby monsters at your 4th level guy.
Also Spawn points are being instituted, there will be a few spawn points right outside the "points of light" the 50th level guards call it "Noobeezone". Dungeon masters will be encouraged to give quests like, collect 10 fire beetle eyes, kill....wait, knock out 10 giant rats and deliver a letter across town.
I heard that if you burn the 4th edition core books, they will scream and emit purple/green smoke :)
And give you cancer.
*And the goal of adventurers is to find 'prophets'
I think that should be 'profits'...
I heard their new core setting will be Forgotten GreyEberron. It will be the best one ever!
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The noise about racial progressions has been a partial smokescreen. It turns out that humans are the only ones to get classes, there are no half-races, and the nonhuman races are classes in and of themselves.
Kobolds will be the new default race.
If you order the game through the super-mega-awesome Online Megastore, your characters all get to start play with a +5 wounding weapon of choice and +5 armor of choice and a mount that can walk on air and water and run twice as fast as a speeding dragon.
WotC is working on 4e with Blizzard. Night Elves and Blood Elves are going to be core races.
Clerics get to turn anything by waving a holy symbol and saying, "Go away you icky-meanie."
Wizards get unlimited magic missiles of any energy type they want per day, as many as fifty per round at level 1.
There will be an option to play 4e in "God Mode."
And you will be able to unlock Son Goku as a playable character if you hit the right Easter eggs.
The 27+ Outer and Inner Planes will be replaced by a simpler cosmology which is easier for the new generation of WoW players to understand: Good Place(tm) and Bad Place(tm). No-one goes there anyway.
The 3 core books will be replaced by a Core Book for each of the 17 Core Classes, followed by a Core Book for each of the 12 Types of DM. This will streamline the product line... into the shape of a dollar sign.
Each book will be magnetically locked for your convenience. You will have to log in to your Wizards website and set up a bank account, then pay an additional fee for each minute of use, in order to unlock your book. This is totally awesome 21st century get-with-the-program stuff that is being done for your convenience.
HA HA HA HA! GET-WITH-THE-PROGRAM! HA HA HA!
I love this.
Sadly...completely and utterly true.
WOTC: Just do it, dumbass.
HA HA HA HA !!!!!!
Two Words: Robotic Bears.
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The reason that WotC is being so tight lipped about the system and not allowing 3rd parties to review it yet is that the original manuscript was destroyed by a rabid 3.5e fan just after Gen Con. They had to start completely over and have been scrambling to get the rules re-written.
Two Words: Robotic Bears.
But not the good kind (the good kind being 70 foot large with a radar dish between the ears).
Two Words: Robotic Bears.But not the good kind (the good kind being 70 foot large with a radar dish between the ears).
Dark Tower reference FTW!
Man, Shardik was the good kind?
Epiconic is a new 4e word for Epic-Iconic characters.
Man, Shardik was the good kind?
Yeah. A 70-foot positronic monstrosity that can kill you with parasitic snot can't be anything but good!