Call me Moe, I was with two other dwarves call them Curley Joe and Larry. We went to pillage and plunder the famous Blackmoor Tower. The first room we came to a 20x20x10 unbenowced to us was a corkscrew elevator room. It turned as it quickly as it dropped, we were already lost. We opened the door onto a hallway perpendicular curving away. Directly across the hallway was a door. Voices and sounds of running coming down the hallway the from both left and right. Crossing the hall we opened the door and saw the room with walls following the curve of the hallway it. It curved out from us for 30’x 20’high and with a heavy purple curtain closing the space off in the back of the room. We hurried into the room and quickly setting a spike in the door. Looking around the room we see two broken kitchen chairs three crockery beer mugs also broken. Then we heard noise coming from the other side of the curtain. Muffled voices and the scooting of a chair came from the other side of the curtain, then “Live from Blackmoor Tower. The Three Dwarves ” boomed a voice.
The curtain parted and there passed a circle of limelights was about thirty orcs setting in chairs around small tables with bowls of popcorn and crockery mugs of beer and more orcs were the line to the round room. The three of us were shocked. They started throwing popcorn. Larry got his wits first and started. “Why did the dumb orc cross the bridge? “ [ The crickets sang ]
“NO DUMB ORC, dumb dwarf…” came from the audience with several “Yeahs” thrown in.
“Oh remember now, it was about Snot Nose the Disgusting.”
“Let's hear more about flemy dwarf.”
They ran Larry out of material fast, they were getting a little disorderly the third time though.
“Come on guys give me a little help here,” said Larry.
I was pushed in front by Curly, “sing, kid.”
“My bonnie lies over the ocean. My bonnie lies...come back to me” I squeaked out two times.
“No more sad song!!! We want a drinking song! “ they all chimed in.
Larry stepped up and started. “Ninety-nine hairy dwarves on the wall. Knock one down…”
“ OH, oh. I know this one. My Ol Mutter sang it to me and my brudders.” said one.
Larry kept singing while the orcs.joined in. He gave me the sign for “lets go.” I slid slowly to the curtain and began to close it, slowly. Not slowly enough.
“Hey what goes on here! They are getting away. “ one orc shouted. Nearly ninety turned and came at us.
my ghost said to Larry’s ghost, “I’m going to haunt that old wizard that gave us that treasure map.”