The Four Yorkshiremen's page

Aye, 'appen it were.

- Special spoon for eating grapefruit? Bloody luxury. We 'ad to go out to t'dung'eap, get t'trowel for t'dung and use that, even when it were 20 below outside.
- You 'ad a trowel? Southern ponce. We 'ad to use us teeth. Us next door neighbours were right posh, and they 'ad two sets, one for t'dung and one for t'grapefruits.
- We didn't even 'ave grapefruits. Eee, life were sparse. We 'ad to make do wi' tennis balls filled wi' Frosty Jack cider.
- And by gum, were we envious of those swanky folk down t'road who 'ad dung. Us excretions were taken by t'payday loan company as soon as they came out and sold to constipated rich bastards in Singapore.
- You soft bastard, etc. etc.