Schism's page

Applies ice bag to Mr. Grinch's Boo-Boo
There, there.
Everything will be fine.
Maxine chased the Bad Santa away.

Schism: Hey!
That wasn't nice.
Santa doesn't do things like that.
.
Looks closely
.
Wait!
You are not Santa.
You are Krampus, the Bad Santa.

Git him Maxine.

Maxine: GRRRR. Chomp

Krampus: Yow! Exits, limping badly

Schism: Good girl Gives Maxine a pat on the head

Yip
What was that?

Yip Yip
It's coming from the den.

Yip Yip
A Puppy!

Yip Yip
Oh, She looks just like Max.

Yip Yip
Let me take you to Mr. Grinch.

Wake up Mr. Grinch.
Look what Santa brought you.

YIP YIP YIP
Isn't she Cute?
What are you going to name her?

Me here to help Schism, have 4 postcards to deliver to everyone!

What do they say!

Hm. There are sooty foot prints that come out of the fireplace, go to Max's bed and back to the fireplace.
Looks like there are cookie crumbs on the floor.
There are some long white hairs in the fireplace.
What does it all mean?

Yikes!
Mr. Grinch is depressed!
Searches den for clues to Max's disappearance.

You mean I have been talking to a stuffed dog?
I wondered why he never left his dog-bed in your den?
But he wasn't there when I was looking for you.

The Witch is Dead!

Where are you Mr. Grinch?
It is almost Christmas, the Ramshackle Sleigh is ready, but no Mr. Grinch.
No Max either, for that matter.

Catching On: 1d20 + 8 ⇒ (4) + 8 = 12

RoyGBiv: 7d7 ⇒ (2, 7, 6, 5, 6, 1, 3) = 30

Number of Spy Cameras watching Mr. Grinch wearing my clothes: 100d1000 ⇒ (166, 339, 757, 838, 233, 525, 440, 708, 439, 275, 709, 62, 461, 891, 730, 45, 225, 678, 96, 571, 124, 245, 579, 222, 444, 231, 755, 727, 525, 277, 947, 778, 228, 598, 14, 968, 416, 926, 57, 512, 541, 345, 920, 653, 886, 526, 817, 801, 342, 174, 575, 759, 340, 380, 604, 821, 817, 14, 103, 872, 542, 601, 693, 626, 46, 52, 759, 62, 254, 339, 496, 132, 333, 219, 122, 312, 956, 789, 492, 373, 243, 884, 617, 87, 516, 216, 695, 806, 936, 933, 699, 702, 429, 109, 158, 804, 345, 450, 246, 979) = 49103

Predetained.

I'm only 19.

Ah, Schism, how fortunate that I found you! I could use your help.

If you should see your vampire self, give her this letter. It's from her father, the Count.

Who is Vampire Schism?

*Shrugs. Leaves letter on Mr. Grinch's workbench.*

You almost made it!

Basher Whacker

Where Win?

5d5 ⇒ (5, 1, 3, 3, 1) = 13
10d5 ⇒ (1, 2, 2, 1, 4, 1, 4, 4, 4, 1) = 24
15d5 ⇒ (1, 3, 3, 1, 2, 2, 3, 5, 2, 4, 1, 5, 3, 4, 5) = 44
20d5 ⇒ (5, 3, 3, 1, 5, 3, 2, 1, 5, 1, 3, 1, 4, 3, 1, 2, 3, 5, 2, 3) = 56
25d5 ⇒ (4, 4, 3, 1, 3, 1, 2, 1, 1, 1, 3, 1, 3, 3, 4, 3, 5, 2, 4, 1, 1, 4, 3, 3, 5) = 66

Seriously, you're only now taking a break? I gave you leave months ago!

I was getting your "Back to School" prank ready.

Sure.
Mr. Grinch is taking a break from the heat so I can take off for a little while.

Number of fireworks Mr. Grinch will set off illegally this year.: 100d1000 + 100d1000 + 100d1000 + 100d1000 + 100d1000 + 100d1000 ⇒ (463, 686, 456, 595, 23, 674, 624, 249, 526, 342, 479, 326, 117, 778, 648, 775, 673, 600, 560, 249, 101, 959, 405, 35, 491, 830, 614, 527, 7, 725, 281, 919, 327, 959, 605, 852, 107, 653, 213, 913, 133, 740, 684, 86, 485, 318, 283, 129, 972, 286, 717, 878, 851, 597, 436, 943, 664, 65, 122, 975, 163, 341, 77, 929, 435, 452, 911, 206, 592, 727, 761, 562, 421, 262, 420, 960, 756, 59, 236, 852, 293, 282, 474, 478, 77, 925, 292, 679, 855, 179, 315, 883, 273, 832, 968, 967, 782, 408, 539, 564) + (251, 773, 666, 417, 640, 809, 787, 7, 934, 53, 583, 93, 839, 199, 298, 156, 758, 98, 675, 781, 100, 911, 628, 647, 724, 882, 254, 980, 484, 303, 429, 99, 392, 323, 835, 768, 677, 16, 812, 231, 822, 384, 166, 344, 334, 842, 706, 253, 620, 601, 475, 7, 700, 370, 842, 741, 863, 110, 100, 942, 705, 742, 585, 670, 403, 565, 785, 181, 293, 711, 964, 229, 266, 95, 342, 498, 143, 429, 38, 404, 89, 711, 218, 959, 722, 302, 713, 972, 832, 602, 196, 200, 842, 704, 338, 802, 352, 911, 758, 730) + (454, 642, 495, 493, 260, 647, 140, 117, 389, 974, 10, 125, 130, 606, 491, 875, 291, 865, 140, 230, 713, 464, 644, 238, 563, 913, 44, 514, 147, 516, 992, 181, 819, 909, 512, 26, 962, 684, 787, 327, 421, 337, 793, 222, 292, 474, 618, 997, 162, 47, 833, 591, 608, 484, 519, 332, 679, 741, 69, 115, 639, 537, 353, 680, 17, 21, 364, 321, 30, 922, 7, 506, 498, 656, 279, 136, 33, 193, 140, 459, 916, 994, 393, 460, 599, 596, 305, 318, 930, 457, 15, 793, 810, 762, 367, 801, 923, 765, 455, 645) + (869, 460, 220, 659, 65, 649, 930, 706, 158, 477, 587, 231, 419, 296, 499, 569, 771, 194, 422, 792, 81, 544, 415, 351, 486, 259, 21, 506, 238, 242, 540, 691, 331, 807, 270, 591, 596, 575, 692, 149, 231, 499, 85, 919, 38, 868, 185, 673, 176, 563, 562, 534, 983, 70, 272, 729, 737, 767, 720, 465, 661, 119, 640, 942, 356, 623, 113, 752, 922, 591, 209, 648, 503, 847, 989, 286, 463, 34, 424, 992, 610, 619, 122, 772, 64, 72, 103, 92, 853, 979, 554, 769, 957, 640, 318, 179, 36, 584, 810, 196) + (636, 307, 863, 620, 772, 653, 719, 143, 938, 327, 91, 163, 525, 534, 792, 798, 969, 745, 16, 108, 119, 155, 313, 165, 432, 673, 564, 685, 783, 726, 107, 198, 936, 681, 280, 592, 281, 432, 687, 568, 275, 422, 279, 766, 916, 144, 194, 888, 85, 653, 878, 852, 539, 331, 679, 403, 901, 694, 811, 313, 680, 332, 458, 97, 26, 276, 32, 758, 481, 429, 937, 884, 743, 91, 368, 476, 773, 348, 483, 518, 113, 576, 990, 681, 389, 159, 114, 326, 293, 164, 866, 419, 421, 767, 978, 587, 869, 689, 325, 674) + (26, 504, 897, 270, 393, 403, 425, 794, 427, 71, 127, 52, 872, 303, 787, 118, 153, 986, 109, 322, 574, 246, 75, 598, 185, 259, 599, 791, 109, 163, 641, 817, 854, 413, 180, 28, 134, 472, 903, 691, 353, 621, 770, 446, 966, 485, 755, 320, 283, 681, 940, 747, 12, 865, 107, 886, 751, 868, 406, 680, 871, 902, 88, 855, 90, 320, 213, 337, 425, 224, 550, 836, 525, 17, 729, 945, 464, 198, 552, 778, 159, 824, 444, 588, 466, 511, 573, 336, 964, 349, 569, 580, 838, 630, 224, 439, 107, 956, 384, 209) = 299578

*Baleful glaring at Schism.*

You're not teasing me, are you?

No Sir!

OOH!
Mr. Grinch has a girlfriend.

Tasks left for Goblin Mime for total forgiveness: 1d5 ⇒ 2

1d1 + 1d2 + 1d3 + 1d4 + 1d5 + 1d6 + 1d7 + 1d8 + 1d9 + 1d10 ⇒ (1) + (1) + (3) + (1) + (4) + (2) + (1) + (2) + (4) + (6) = 25

There is only one, Mr. Grinch.

I only have 2 bits.

*Goes up to Schism, holding a duck and a cover.*

Relax, it's taking place in the past, nothing bad is going to happen.

Thanks boss.

Duck and cover!

Looks bashful.
Hands behind back.

I... lost it.

What pipe bomb?

Opens the parcel the wrong way.
Oh! A pipe bomb.

Looks everywhere
But there is no card.
I don't know who to send a thankyou note to.

Looks at the postcards.
I see Mr. Wally in all of them, and Mr. Heydrich in one of them.
I see many people I don't know in the rest of them.

People who fell for my pranks: 100d1000 + 100d1000 + 100d1000 + 1 ⇒ (94, 859, 493, 680, 713, 47, 536, 787, 94, 355, 358, 500, 734, 637, 241, 644, 483, 325, 242, 963, 66, 88, 280, 647, 482, 561, 981, 766, 943, 320, 29, 516, 550, 255, 412, 536, 253, 959, 715, 25, 385, 266, 447, 902, 786, 913, 494, 794, 967, 629, 190, 806, 386, 882, 196, 33, 855, 464, 350, 643, 454, 579, 886, 903, 451, 771, 235, 422, 614, 222, 861, 120, 868, 584, 789, 822, 129, 141, 199, 691, 160, 549, 757, 761, 58, 158, 121, 359, 526, 864, 238, 240, 474, 137, 356, 239, 447, 504, 30, 542) + (898, 199, 602, 470, 284, 674, 324, 745, 184, 229, 247, 771, 436, 217, 873, 655, 838, 902, 962, 886, 572, 221, 729, 90, 280, 364, 491, 601, 590, 13, 769, 268, 564, 760, 92, 39, 797, 972, 208, 419, 633, 637, 506, 887, 837, 823, 16, 246, 754, 152, 811, 185, 557, 236, 339, 61, 914, 322, 912, 247, 638, 148, 744, 420, 232, 260, 265, 13, 466, 145, 229, 560, 578, 553, 245, 762, 71, 984, 180, 504, 787, 79, 225, 452, 972, 504, 392, 316, 742, 589, 70, 183, 121, 129, 846, 481, 874, 894, 997, 62) + (880, 589, 718, 355, 838, 77, 643, 704, 352, 330, 394, 273, 275, 951, 799, 404, 118, 366, 283, 709, 671, 667, 217, 460, 771, 25, 721, 96, 662, 668, 963, 142, 787, 494, 857, 537, 361, 405, 905, 829, 218, 337, 606, 895, 8, 675, 106, 916, 694, 177, 978, 282, 729, 231, 422, 91, 194, 111, 427, 277, 688, 489, 231, 255, 406, 477, 289, 495, 23, 965, 754, 654, 209, 608, 404, 972, 149, 89, 53, 360, 890, 886, 208, 968, 128, 476, 936, 55, 352, 288, 850, 244, 269, 529, 894, 583, 390, 801, 185, 710) + 1 = 145723

Hee Hee Hee!
Boy, Mr. Grinch and I had so much fun this weekend.
No one escaped unscathed.
Of course, he is still did a whole lot more than me.

6d666 ⇒ (71, 137, 158, 126, 466, 392) = 1350

Bounty on Goblin Mime: 100d1000 + 100d1000 + 100d1000 + 1000 ⇒ (878, 707, 398, 141, 700, 292, 82, 36, 211, 77, 973, 918, 212, 156, 407, 184, 114, 98, 939, 229, 79, 641, 278, 5, 778, 705, 400, 301, 421, 390, 327, 322, 909, 362, 90, 51, 516, 83, 635, 755, 416, 288, 278, 960, 6, 341, 310, 811, 337, 960, 47, 732, 140, 968, 950, 953, 128, 138, 812, 162, 270, 511, 449, 509, 470, 933, 502, 89, 928, 687, 419, 49, 632, 356, 919, 287, 479, 946, 13, 266, 556, 604, 411, 821, 345, 207, 350, 661, 986, 77, 954, 47, 600, 268, 198, 380, 852, 39, 284, 11) + (983, 430, 37, 417, 885, 612, 867, 463, 955, 701, 952, 943, 574, 578, 484, 76, 226, 723, 764, 110, 740, 391, 725, 607, 151, 19, 433, 5, 674, 333, 984, 860, 75, 995, 711, 639, 285, 413, 750, 611, 589, 540, 883, 457, 451, 909, 589, 509, 443, 838, 499, 15, 634, 660, 146, 54, 502, 439, 29, 508, 607, 939, 719, 954, 178, 699, 604, 56, 484, 251, 757, 849, 98, 666, 907, 297, 215, 282, 474, 524, 544, 534, 383, 429, 545, 504, 765, 263, 602, 300, 848, 692, 4, 660, 780, 447, 406, 168, 296, 824) + (924, 617, 468, 916, 62, 779, 498, 109, 943, 149, 673, 301, 740, 206, 187, 691, 156, 910, 185, 752, 415, 254, 45, 241, 519, 965, 484, 873, 643, 832, 502, 969, 163, 852, 366, 255, 501, 811, 837, 393, 942, 737, 459, 428, 892, 882, 229, 758, 472, 475, 850, 659, 585, 561, 815, 616, 331, 961, 67, 146, 511, 829, 940, 962, 268, 576, 464, 295, 251, 703, 144, 168, 8, 515, 679, 901, 804, 335, 768, 104, 671, 714, 77, 846, 219, 194, 132, 300, 701, 206, 820, 431, 740, 733, 29, 484, 699, 344, 253, 993) + 1000 = 150193

Lets Goblin Mime out of his invisible box.

There you go. Now, what were you saying?

Perception: Observing Gervase Goldhawk's attacks: 1d20 + 10 ⇒ (19) + 10 = 29

EW!

Sauron of the Savage Land's intelligence before draining Schism's Life Force: 2d100 ⇒ (97, 80) = 177
Sauron of the Savage Land's intelligence after draining Schism's Life Force: 177 - 10d100 ⇒ 177 - (24, 30, 26, 64, 74, 80, 16, 64, 81, 4) = -286

The price of doing business: 1d100 ⇒ 64
The price of not doing business: 1d100 ⇒ 60
The price of ignoring business: 1d100 ⇒ 4

Do: 1d100 ⇒ 59
Ra: 1d100 ⇒ 16
Mi: 1d100 ⇒ 10
Fa: 1d100 ⇒ 27
So: 1d100 ⇒ 88
La: 1d100 ⇒ 9
Ti: 1d100 ⇒ 21
Do: 1d100 ⇒ 79

Wakes up for real. Sees Mr. Grinch

Sorry Boss: 1d100 ⇒ 80

GAH! - I'm awake: 1d1 ⇒ 1

Zzzzzz: 100d100 ⇒ (53, 1, 24, 11, 69, 67, 68, 74, 65, 14, 86, 9, 10, 45, 4, 49, 89, 71, 99, 68, 99, 12, 32, 17, 77, 15, 26, 8, 12, 88, 50, 76, 74, 99, 75, 84, 5, 75, 64, 19, 68, 54, 87, 61, 39, 70, 55, 85, 27, 77, 18, 86, 3, 18, 25, 46, 3, 27, 38, 86, 100, 28, 61, 29, 49, 9, 70, 39, 46, 69, 59, 86, 98, 39, 90, 60, 59, 65, 42, 80, 89, 85, 79, 63, 91, 80, 44, 92, 11, 87, 53, 92, 93, 52, 54, 36, 52, 89, 79, 52) = 5507

Hours of enjoyment so far from Mr. Grinch's present: 6d24 ⇒ (24, 17, 6, 17, 6, 21) = 91

Christmas presents received from Mr. Grinch: 1d6 ⇒ 1

I am so tired.
Feels like I have been doing twice the work I usually do.
ZZZ

You are so competitive boss: 1d1 ⇒ 1