Kuuthros the Chef's page

As Ben seems to be settling in for the night, a pointy nailed finger suddenly starts prodding him in the back of his shoulder. "Psst! Psssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssst! Munchie!" comes the raspy, whispering voice of a familiar kobold, apparently nicknaming his favorite dinner guest already.

Turning back will reveal Kuuthros seems to have grown a substantial amount. Looking down will further reveal why: he's standing on a chest! "New meats friendly. Like Kuuthros' food. Kuuthros return favor!" he said, indicating the chest he stood on. "Kuuthros can't open it. Can Munchie? Kuuthros saw crew take new meats' stuff, put them in safe place. Chest comes from there."

Wow... I have never seen a plan go from a perfect 1 to a perfect 20 so fast.

So I guess they caught me hiding the rum, but apparently, my draconic cussing and banging on the locker is like a lullaby.

Perception: 1d20 + 6 ⇒ (11) + 6 = 17

Kuuthros seems proud of his catch, happily walking around and offering extras to others. He seems to be in good spirits. Upon receiving his rum, Kuuthros studies it, before opting to try and hide it. It could be useful later, one never knows... for cooking, or slitting a throat with a broken bottle....

Hide Rum: 1d20 + 7 + 4 ⇒ (1) + 7 + 4 = 12

As the darkness of the sea starts to cover the ship and the lanterns go out, Kuuthros sees this as an opportunity to make use of his kobold traits. His little eyes slip open and take in his sights; with perfect vision in the dark, he had little trouble getting to the locked cabinets where he'd seen the equipment of the new arrivals get stored. Kuuthros would rather try to take over command himself, but the new recruits didn't seem so bad... the woman who had the otter seemed like a good pet owner... and none of them had treated him poorly. In fact, they actually appreciated his hard work! It might be worth siding with them... for now, anyways.

Tapping his chin, Kuuthros started to finagle the lock on the door. Getting to the cabinet was easy and quiet, but actually getting it open without a lockpick... or skill with it... or anything conventional, really, was bound to make plenty of noise if he wasn't careful!

Making a check to try and open the locker without making too much noise.
Stealth Check: 1d20 + 7 + 4 ⇒ (20) + 7 + 4 = 31

Kuuthros yelped at the whip, startled back and dropping his plate of 'food' at his feet and causing his otter passenger to snap it's eyes wide open in surprise. For a moment, Kuuthros looks at the lost meal and seems about ready to cry (can kobolds cry? If they can, Kuuthros seems close to it.)

Then, he chirps up, gathers his meal and puts it on the plate. "Kuuthros can cook, not work miracles! Couldn't find good food! Kuuthros will have to fish for it! Catch a tasty whale, have an all you can eat buffet!" he assured the big scary human, before skulking away to the ships' edge. Under his breath, his whispers up to his otter buddy. "(Poison too obvious. Needed nutmeg and fresh lettuce. Will have to kill them with the catch today, dump them back for the fishes to eat... hee hee hee, that is poetic irony, right?)" The otter simply yawns in response, but evidently, Kuuthros is not sitting idle. Not surprising for a kobold to be scheming.

Saddened by his failed barnacle baking, he hops up to the railing and tosses them off the side, setting the plate down before going about setting up a series of lines. Fishing wasn't his strong suit, but how hard can it be? They're stupid fish!

Kuuthros will be taking the work diligently to catch today's meals. (Preferably a blowfish. The poison isn't quite as obvious.)
Fishing Check: 1d20 + 2 + 4 ⇒ (10) + 2 + 4 = 16

"Goooooooooooood morning, all to the the scallies and wags!" comes a very scratchy and somewhat high-pitched voice from the direction of the galley below deck. Mere seconds later, a little kobold scampers up on deck, carrying what looks like a plate full of stuffed barnacles. Stuffed with what is up for debate, but judging from the steam, they appear to have been freshly cooked.

And is... is that an otter? On his head? More accurately, the creature seems to be hanging off his head and down his back. It looks comfortable enough, eyes open just enough to make sure his ride isn't going to knock him off... the kobold seems content as well, apparently using him as a fashion statement than a companion.

"Kuuthros has breakfast! Tasty sea-salty treats! His feisty Barnacle Bites!" Kuuthros says, offering up the plate of sea critters to "Scourge" before peering out from under it, looking up at the rigging above. "Oh no, no, and another no! Kuuthros not a climber! Kuuthros a cook! See? Barnacle Bites!" he replied, apparently not even going to attempt the climb. Hey, the monkey got there first... oh, a monkey! Kuuthros hasn't tasted that yet!

Profession: Cook: 1d20 + 6 ⇒ (5) + 6 = 11

...I'd pass on breakfast, if I were ya'll.

Ah, crackerbarrels.

Sorry gang, got tied up by RL and computer issues (I hate having to scrub a hard drive)... anyways! I'm back, and glad to see I passed the selection process! Lemme get started so we can continue!

Doing some updating. I'll also answer those 3 key queries from above:

1. What position do you see yourself eventually in on a ship?
Ship's cook, naturally, though he could also be part-time ship surgeon. Disturbingly, but surprisingly, learning to pull off the tasty parts of things gives him a good idea of how to put them back together... mostly.

2. How do you feel about piracy in general? (This includes stealing, killing, plundering, etc.)
Kuuthros is Chaotic Neutral, so he's chiefly out to see himself taken care of. As such, he doesn't really have much care about the pirate imagery, though he is certainly up for anything that gives him new ingredients and supplies to work with.

3. Which campaign trait are you selecting and why?
Ship's Surgeon. While he's never actually been on a ship, he's adaptable and happy anywhere. That means that whether on dry land or a rickety ship, he knows how to cut up (and glue together) living things.

Since I finally have access to a computer and stable internet connection again, I'm ready to try and get back into action. And I have always wanted to play this campaign, so here is my submission!

Presenting Kuuthros, the kobold "master" chef and hunter/gatherer/ranger! He isn't quite finished, but he's an eccentric little guy who loves to cook and prepare a variety of things, mostly semi-sentient creatures. His ultimate goal is to create a fully comprehensive cookbook of recipes, his magnum opus magnum opus, The Compendium of the World's Most Magnificent Creatures and How to Cook Them for Dinner. His current book of recipes includes several practical and theoretical ways to prepare and serve kobolds, goblins, gnomes (gamey, but very delicious!), humans, dwarves (sour, recommend lots of sugar), drunken half-elves (already conveniently marinated!), bugbears, various animals, even more various bugs, and a very grouchy ghoul.

I haven't figured out his stats exactly yet, but I do know he's a ranged fighter and professional cook. He's smart (if a little... enthusiastic) and actually does know his stuff (including how to write... not a common feat for a kobold!) He knows how to hunt a lot of different things, and he's fairly skilled fighting from a long range.

He's currently in Port Peril trying to add a large number of seafood recipes to his cookbook, even the more unsavory ones. He intends to test them all and see which ones are the best for his cookbook. If he were forced onto a ship, he would be the crew's cook (at his request-more chances to cook sea critters!) and probably the ship's hold organizer so that he can get to all the things he needs as quickly as possible. If need be, he also might act as a ship's doctor ("Kuuthros has a whole section on home remedies!")

I would love to be sent on some kind of adventure with Jebrothane. A cowardly gnome gardener and a enthusiastic kobold cook on a quest for delicious spices from the garden of the gods! And possibly a bite of them!

"Look! A giant spider just crawled into that ominous crypt! Let's catch it! I've got a great southern fried spider legs recipe!"

"...are you serious? That place looks like it will eat us before we can even get close to that spider. That, and I HATE spiders!"

"Oh come on! I bet Mr. Dodgeyball would like to go!"

"It's Mr. Dodgery!"

"Whatever, you and Mr. Delicious coming or what?"

I'm not exactly sure what you'd be looking for in a character, but if you want one with some flavor, I've got this one (also, no puns intended).

Presenting Kuuthros the Chef, a chaotic neutral kobold ranger and "master" cook. He likes to eat a variety of different things, especially stuff he's never tried. His ultimate goal is to have a taste of every semi-sentient creature in the world and write a cookbook on how to best prepare them all for any grouchy visitors you have (like the in-laws... whatever those are). He's not out to kill everything, he just wants to try a bite; killing would waste them and stem the populations of potentially tasty creatures!

His current book of recipes includes several practical and theoretical ways to prepare and serve kobolds, goblins, gnomes (gamey, but very delicious!), humans, dwarves (sour, recommend lots of sugar), drunken half-elves (already conveniently marinated!), bugbears, various animals, even more various bugs, and a very grouchy ghoul.

Goals for him would probably include acquiring new herbs, spices and cooking ingredients for small, tracking down and tasting new creatures as mid-level and ultimately finishing his magnum opus, The Compendium of the World's Most Magnificent Creatures and How to Cook Them for Dinner.