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As it happens, Mikhail courageously plinks the enemy.
Madcap circles around it and adds his own not-very-effective smack.
The Balrog starts getting big.
The enemy in blue swings wildly at the two Pathfinders assailing it.
They both duck out of the way.
Round 2 - bolded may go
Madcap
Balrog
Blue (-4 HP, blinded 1 round)
Razisus
Mikhail
Thornrose (studied red)
Alecto
Red
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They both duck out of the way.
Mikhail doesn't so much 'duck' as 'conveniently fail to be taller'.
"What sorcery is this?!?" He boggles at his foe's awfully real-statue-like hardness. "So be it, then! No more Mr. Soft-Cushions!!!"
He lifts his flail high above his head...
...and in so doing, nearly falls over backward.
Alecto knocks the reddish creature back to the ground.
Mikhail takes advantage of his height to avoid being hit, but cannot counter with his overhead swing.
Razisus, however, bashes the prone creature. It chips a bit.
Thornrose also strikes it while it is down.
The construct rises to its feet once again and swings a fist at Thornose.
Near Thornrose, at least.
Round 3 - bolded may go
Madcap
Balrog
Blue (-4 HP, blinded 1 round)
Razisus
Mikhail
Thornrose (studied red)
Alecto
Red (-11 HP)
The clown spins completely around with her flail extended before her in both hands and attempts to knock the statue's block off.
The Balrog plans his next move.
Madcap becomes a whirling dervish, easily slamming her mace into the unseeing creature.
The unseeing creature tries to respond by smashing the clown into small pieces.
And actually makes contact by chance.
Round 3 - bolded may go
Madcap (-5 HP)
Blue (-13 HP, blinded until the start of Madcap's turn)
Balrog
Razisus
Mikhail
Thornrose (studied red)
Alecto
Red (-11 HP)
Razisus smashes the statue and backs away.
Thornrose follows up with a successful swing of his own.
Alecto drops the creature to the ground once more.
Round 3 - bolded may go
Madcap (-5 HP)
Blue (-13 HP, blinded until the start of Madcap's turn)
Balrog
Razisus
Mikhail
Thornrose (studied red, AOO)
Alecto
Red (-20 HP, prone)
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Mikhail realizes he has now lost his much-treasured weapon of surprise! In an attempt to regain it, he does something MOST unexpected:
He draws forth a wand he has never used before, made from three colorfully-patterned snakeskins, woven and molded around a pyrite core and studded with numerous small garnets. He lifts it up to his eye like a kaleidoscope...and receives a curious personal vision!
Mikhail finds one of the rare good times to roll a 1, while Thornrose takes advantage of Red's repeated falls.
Balrog chills.
The enemy is definitely sick of Thornrose.
It can't do much about it, though.
Round 4 - bolded may go
Madcap (-5 HP)
Balrog
Blue (-13 HP)
Razisus
Mikhail
Thornrose (studied red, AOO)
Alecto
Red (-27 HP, prone)
The unknown prankster wraps the chain of her weapon around the statue's ankle and pulls. "Oooh, no you don't."
The pierrot turns to The Balrog and says "Okay, to be completely honest that wasn't really our class song. That was A Whole New World. What you were doing was more like the class's dirty limerick. Motto maybe. Tagline?"
She considers for a long moment.
Madcap forces Blue to follow the trip train. It rises to its feet (maybe) and goes after the jester.
Ooh, so close.
Round 4 - bolded may go
Madcap (-5 HP, AOO)
Blue (-13 HP)
Balrog (delay)
Razisus
Mikhail (AOO)
Thornrose (studied red)
Alecto
Red (-27 HP, prone)
Red is made of harder stone than Thornrose expects - but not so hard that the Balrog's smash doesn't destroy it.
Round 4-5 - bolded may go
Madcap (-5 HP, AOO)
Blue (-13 HP)
Balrog
Razisus (ready)
Mikhail (AOO)
Thornrose (studied red)
Alecto
Red
Madcap chips more stone with her ball and chain.
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Mikhail Ximenez watches Balrog smash the other statue with an expression of mixed pain and shock, before whirling about on the other one now at his feet.
"Blast, they ARE statues! This affront will NOT be tolerated! YOU! It is well you prostrate yourself before me, for you are hereby charged with no fewer than 27 infractions of the Absalom Universal Craftsman's Code, 4 infringements of informal common-law regarding the receipt and consumption of gifts of street-food, 1 count of belligerent loitering, AND 1 count of obstructing an unholy-man in his rightful duties...AS WELL AS..." Here he momentarily fiddles with the heads on his flail as though using them as some sort of baroque, deadly abacus, "..precisely 2.333333019 transgressions against the Pan-Infernal Concordat Regarding the Due Deference and Inerrancy of Mortal Unholy-Men. For these therefore, shall ye receive NO MERCY!"
The Pathfinders keep smashing Blue. Blue tries to smash back.
Round 5-6 - bolded may go
Madcap (-9 HP)
Blue (-23 HP)
Balrog
Razisus
Mikhai
Thornrose (studied red)
Alecto
Red
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Feeling something large and hot behind him, Mikhail moves to make way for The Brazen Bullshit-Artist, and stops just shy of poking Madcap in the eye with his snakeskin-pyrite-garnet wand.
"You there, Prodigal Daughter of Fashion; have you ever considered the blessings of the Church of Heresies...?"
Madcap gazes upon the wand with a sense of triumph. "AH HA!"
She suddenly stops dodging for her life and takes a smug half-step back.
"Thank you, Mickey, that should do the trick." She looks at the wand and back triumphantly at the statue. "This, as everyone knows, is a wand of stone to flesh! You won't be so hard to hurt when you have actual nerve-endings and the consistency of raw liver!"
"Mickey, old chum, use the command phrase "Tippecanoe and Tyler too! And then we'll see how tough this guy is." she advances menacingly upon the statue, rolling up her sleeves and laughing evilly "MWAHAHAHAHA!"
Madcap shakes the statue up.
Mikhail grants the jester some luck.
The Balrog chips a bit more off of it.
Razisus lies in wait.
Round 5-6 - bolded may go
Madcap (-9 HP)
Blue (-27 HP, shaken)
Balrog
Razisus (ready)
Mikhai
Thornrose (studied red)
Alecto
Red
Thornrose hacks at the remaining living statue. It looks close to breaking.
It shows no indication of changing its tactics.
Round 6-7 - bolded may go
Madcap (-9 HP)
Blue (-29 HP)
Balrog
Razisus
Mikhail (-6 HP)
Thornrose (studied red)
Alecto
Red
With the thing seemingly distracted by Mikhail's wand, Madcap attempts to deliver an uppercut with her flail--aptly named The Punchline.
Madcap's punchline goes right through the remaining statue, ending the threat.
Where to next?
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"Well now, that was a fine, fine bit of iconoclasty! Most unexpected. A woman like you could go far in the service of Geryon...."
With that, Mikhail abruptly cuts short his own plaudits and begins nearly-eye-gouging everyone else with his strange wand (while seemingly ignoring the huge bruise on his own arm); as you each are made to peer into it in turn, you experience mysterious, fleeting visions...:
The team moves to the northeast.
The solitary figure of Ambrus Valsin himself jogs out of the Quadrangle’s courtyard. “You lot, we have a crisis here that can’t wait.” He turns and gestures to the Quadrangle. “When the banquet started, I dismissed the first-year initiates back here to continue their studies for a few more hours. The damned Aspis were waiting inside two of the dormitories,” the venture-captain says, pointing to two ivy-covered stone buildings. “I think their plan is to leverage the initiates as hostages if they have no other escape route.”
Venture-Captain Valsin regards you with an inscrutable look. “This situation can only become more desperate. The safety of our initiates can’t wait another minute. Consider yourself drafted, because you’re all I’ve got. I’m heading to the southern dormitory. You head to the northern dormitory. Talk them down, or hit them hard and fast.”
Valsin explains what he knows so far. The hostage taker is alone and has declared that he can kill all the hostages almost instantly. The venture-captain does not think the threat stems from a magical spell, but otherwise believes it to be credible. Thus far, the hostage taker has remained close to the main door, so reconnaissance is possible—although the doors are locked and the keys are missing.
Grunting at her work, the clown continues to pound the statue into smaller bits of stone.
"Hah! Nice hit Madcap!"
Suddenly she looks pointedly The Balrog. "Who told you that!?"
She stands up and steps toward the red giant almost threateningly. "Who told you that I am the terror that flounces in the night!? I am the pigeon who does her business on the statue of evil! I am Madcap! Who?"
"Well now, that was a fine, fine bit of iconoclasty! Most unexpected. A woman like you could go far in the service of Geryon...."
Suddenly Madcap is beside the Mikhail saying "Have your people call my people. We'll do lunch."
"You guys are excellent combatants, I'm sure victory will be ours! Ready to go Northeast." leshy proudly exclaims
"I don't know. I mean, we've only just met and now we're all going off to the northeast?"
The team moves to the northeast.
The solitary figure of Ambrus Valsin himself jogs out of the Quadrangle’s courtyard. “You lot, we have a crisis here that can’t wait.” He turns and gestures to the Quadrangle. “When the banquet started, I dismissed the first-year initiates back here to continue their studies for a few more hours. The damned Aspis were waiting inside two of the dormitories,” the venture-captain says, pointing to two ivy-covered stone buildings. “I think their plan is to leverage the initiates as hostages if they have no other escape route.”
Venture-Captain Valsin regards you with an inscrutable look. “This situation can only become more desperate. The safety of our initiates can’t wait another minute. Consider yourself drafted, because you’re all I’ve got. I’m heading to the southern dormitory. You head to the northern dormitory. Talk them down, or hit them hard and fast.”
Valsin explains what he knows so far. The hostage taker is alone and has declared that he can kill all the hostages almost instantly. The venture-captain does not think the threat stems from a magical spell, but otherwise believes it to be credible. Thus far, the hostage taker has remained close to the main door, so reconnaissance is possible—although the doors are locked and the keys are missing.
Madcap makes her way up to the door on the southern wall, quietly rehearsing possible intros to herself. "I am the--"
She looks it over for possible alarms or traps.
And if it is and/or is locked she attempts to bypass it.
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The Balrog, now reduced to his usual human-ish size, strokes his chin thoughtfully.
"If we let the Aspis kill the hostages then they have no more leverage... and it would only be a few initiates, who are easily replaced..."
He sighs and shakes his head. "I suspect that might not reflect well on our records or our pay.
Well, we might need stealth. Some way to open the door, and some way to avoid being seen. All I've got on that front is smokesticks that I can see through. Not exactly subtle.
Or, as Valsin said, we could try talking them down. See what they want. Bribe them. Or lie through our teeth. I'm okay at that."