[PFS] Your B4 Goblins! (Inactive)

Game Master Yours is mined

Stab Time: 1d20 - 1 ⇒ (9) - 1 = 8
Dmg: 1d4 - 1 ⇒ (4) - 1 = 3

chuffy is disappointed when the man hurt his face, and doubly when his dogslicer fails to draw blood

GM, does Mogmurch need to make a ride check if he just wants to whack without moving or having his mount attack?

Mogmurch whacks at the funny lady in the funny clothes. He whacks real fast!

Dogslicer, Flanking, Haste, Higher ground: 1d20 - 1 + 2 + 1 + 1 ⇒ (3) - 1 + 2 + 1 + 1 = 6
Slashing damage: 1d4 - 2 ⇒ (4) - 2 = 2

Dogslicer, Flanking, Haste, Higher ground: 1d20 - 1 + 2 + 1 + 1 ⇒ (6) - 1 + 2 + 1 + 1 = 9
Slashing damage: 1d4 - 2 ⇒ (2) - 2 = 0

The little goblin, enhanced by the sugar lets out a glee
MEE LIKE CAKE as he runs up to the halfling lady and attempts to smack her upside the head with his little club
1d20 - 1 ⇒ (18) - 1 = 17
1d3 - 1 ⇒ (2) - 1 = 1

Gimme you head he says laughing and laughing.

It’s air-swings 4lyfe 4 Chuffy and Mogmurch.

After eating his fill Poog sidles up to the bride, planting a big kiss 4 luck on the side of her face with his club.

Initiative Round #3/4:

Chuffy (-4 hp)
Poog hasted
---
Half-shank Hen (red) (-7 hp)
Half-shank Rooster (green) (-1 hp)
---
Mogmurch hasted
Reta (-7 hp)

Reta’s turn!

Battle Map!

These goblins are fun!

Reta takes another swing at red.

attack+flank: 1d20 + 2 + 2 ⇒ (17) + 2 + 2 = 21
slash: 1d4 ⇒ 4

Reta cuts the bride’s face, causing her to screeeeam in rage and pain.

Her husband looks back, deeply concerned by the amount of blood gushing from her nose and mouth.

“Stick around, Zit-face.” He calls to Chuffy as he steps back 5’ to try and put Reta down.

“Together now, my love.”

Green improved unarmed strike + flank on Reta: 1d20 + 3 + 2 ⇒ (10) + 3 + 2 = 15
bludgeoning damage: 1d4 + 1 ⇒ (3) + 1 = 4

As her hubby drops Reta in the dust, Mrs Halfshanks redirects her blow at Poog! However, blood from her scalp drains into her eyes and she misses.

Red improved unarmed strike on Poog: 1d20 + 3 ⇒ (10) + 3 = 13
bludgeoning damage: 1d4 + 1 ⇒ (2) + 1 = 3

Initiative Round #4/5:

Chuffy (-4 hp)
Poog hasted
---
Half-shank Jenny (red) (-11 hp)
Half-shank Donkey (green) (-1 hp)
---
Mogmurch hasted
Reta (zero-3 hp) prone, unconscious, bleeding out [stabilize DC 10: d20+1-3]

Longshank (& chicken) slayers are up!

Battle Map!

He will try to knock the female halfling upside the head twice with his club
1d20 - 1 ⇒ (10) - 1 = 9
1d20 - 1 ⇒ (19) - 1 = 18

1d4 - 2 ⇒ (3) - 2 = 1
1d4 - 2 ⇒ (1) - 2 = -1

From atop his pig, Mogmurch whacks away at the shortshanks lady!

Dogslicer, Haste, Higher Ground: 1d20 - 1 + 1 + 1 ⇒ (4) - 1 + 1 + 1 = 5
Slashing damage: 1d4 - 2 ⇒ (3) - 2 = 1

Dogslicer, Haste, Higher Ground: 1d20 - 1 + 1 + 1 ⇒ (15) - 1 + 1 + 1 = 16
Slashing damage: 1d4 - 2 ⇒ (4) - 2 = 2

From atop his fearless mount, Mogmurch drives his dog slicer forward destroying the female’s right bicep -- the blade carving muscle and tendon from bone.

She stifles a YELP! as Poog applies his club to the back of her noggin, knocking her to the ground beside Reta.

The male halfling pauses. His EYES wide and his mouth open

:O

He glances quickly over his left shoulder towards the river. It looks like he’s readying to flee.

Initiative Round #4/5:

Chuffy (-4 hp)
Poog hasted
---
Wellma (red) (zero-2 hp) prone, unconscious, bleeding out
Winnius (green) (-1 hp)
---
Mogmurch hasted
Reta (zero-3 hp) prone, unconscious, bleeding out [stabilize DC 10: d20+1-3]

Chuffy + Reta whatcha doin’?

Battle Map!

Chuffy stabs!: 1d20 - 1 ⇒ (4) - 1 = 3
Dmg: 1d4 - 1 ⇒ (3) - 1 = 2

Chuffy gets out the chicken pen , and tries to stab the human, who easily dodges the weapon

Goblin will stab ya, and kill ya until you die!

Trying not to die

stabilization: 1d20 + 1 - 3 ⇒ (18) + 1 - 3 = 16

Chuffy threatens and stabs but doesn’t connect with the distraught halfling.

Reta doesn’t die! She remains unconscious but stable at -3 hp

♨ ♡ ✊

Passing Licktoads start chanting and cheering, seeing the bloody conflict around the wedding reception area playing out. "And there's even cake afterwards!"

Looking around, wedding guests and goblins alike see the farmhouse, boatshed and even the outdoor privy on fire!

Pebbletop carries a fence paling aloft with the head of a small terrier impaled atop it.

Chief Gutwad’s vizier Slorb rushes about holding up the skirts of the ENORMOUS washer-woman’s dress he wears like a circus tent. Occasionally he drops the edge of the dress, trips and falls flat on his face.

Nasty Gramel wears a female longshanks corset as a mask. The goblin witch has cut three eye-holes through the canvas in order to see. She SMACKS any gob/longshank that gets too close with an iron griddle as she swigs from a wine flagon.

This is all too much for Winnius Paddlefoot who withdraws on the double towards the river, stripping off his black vest and bow tie as he flees.

“Rest well, my love. I will be back for you shortly.”

Wellma’s cool white lace hat and assorted wedding gifts lie scattered about for the taking.

Full round withdraw action. If you let Mr Halfshank go, we are OUT OF COMBAT!

"Short-shanks not get away so easy!" Mogmurch screeches as he tries to control the piglet...

Ride, Bareback vs DC 20: 1d20 + 7 - 5 ⇒ (18) + 7 - 5 = 20

...and is almost surprised when it obeys. "Trample!" the cake-crazed goblin yells as they both tackle the fleeing halfling...

Dogslicer, Haste, Charging, High Ground: 1d20 - 1 + 1 + 2 + 1 ⇒ (9) - 1 + 1 + 2 + 1 = 12
Slashing damage: 1d4 - 2 ⇒ (4) - 2 = 2

Bite, Charging: 1d20 + 1 + 2 ⇒ (20) + 1 + 2 = 23
Bite damage: 1d4 ⇒ 2
Crit Confirmation: 1d20 + 1 + 2 ⇒ (18) + 1 + 2 = 21
Crit damage: 1d4 ⇒ 2

That... was better than I expected.

The hasted goblin knight charges his escaping quarry. His tarnished blade lops off a tuft of the half-shank’s hair.

While his steed bites the bridegroom’s bruised buttocks, the wound doesn’t even slow the cad down!

Round #5/6:

Chuffy (-4 hp)
Poog hasted
---
Wellma (red) prone, unconscious
Winnius (green) (-5 hp)
---
Mogmurch hasted
Reta (zero-3 hp) prone, unconscious, stable

Chuffy, Poog & Reta What would you like to do?

Battle Map!

Chuffy rushes to the cake, hoping to slice himself a good meal before the rest of the tribe eat it!

Poor runs to eat more cake!

Chuffy and Poog both run to the smashed cake stand.

Reta presumably continues her nap. "ZZZZZzzzzzz"

Winnius Paddlefoot withdraws again from the engagement with Squealy and Mogmurch.

He appears to be trying to escape the carnage to the river.

Round #6/7:

Chuffy (-4 hp)
Poog hasted
---
Wellma (red) prone, unconscious
Winnius (green) (-5 hp)
---
Mogmurch hasted
Reta (zero-3 hp) prone, unconscious, stable

Gobs up!

Battle Map!

Ride, Bareback vs DC 20: 1d20 + 7 - 5 ⇒ (17) + 7 - 5 = 19

”Why piggy no chase!?” Mogmurch screeches angrily as Squeely Nord decides the cake is much more interesting than a shortshanks.

Fine to call this combat done - highly unlikely to make the check in time to catch Winnius.

With Squealy acting like a ‘funny-looking little gray horse’ and refusing to give chase, Mogmurch can only watch as Winnius Paddlefoot makes good his escape.

The last the Licktoads see of the rakish bridegroom is the ⚞Splash⚟ he makes entering the Soggy River.

Poog runs to eat more cake!

Unfortunately, Zarongel teaches his new Adept a hard lesson. A goblin can get too much of a good thing –– in this case decadent longshanks food!

Poog loses his haste and becomes sickened for rounds: 1d6 ⇒ 3

Chuffy may take heed of this as he fills his face – or maybe not ... It is Chuffy we’re talking about. ;)

Reta continues her dirt nap with the bride.

⛪

Between their wedding attire and gifts, the newlyweds have a halfling-sized corset and bridal veil, a black vest, a matching bow tie, a wooden doll dressed as a bride, 18 cloth diapers, a bottle of perfume (tastes like minty licorice!), a brass flask containing poor quality corn-whiskey (doesn’t taste like corn at all!), a lace horse-shoe, a little black book (with all the pages torn out) and two gold rings worth 25 geepee’s each.

"You raid good!" comes the cry from your fellow Licktoads as they survey the carnage, and what is left of the trotter-stamped cake.

We are just about to wrap this up, gang! Reta is still unconscious, but there is still time for actions and dialogue on the way back to Licktoad Village.

Also, if you haven’t completed your PFS details, can you please do so in Discussion? Then I can sort out chronicles and potential boons.

After his wretching, the goblin goes up to Reta and kicks her Get up Poo Poo Caca

casting CLW 1d8 ⇒ 6

"Thanks butt breath" She says half-jokingly. "Did we burn down barn?"

"Who need burn down barn when there be cake!" Mogmurch screeches happily from atop the piglet, who is still steadfastly ignoring any efforts to move him from the wreckage of the confectionary. "We take piggy back, train him up, ride into battle!"

Chuffy, his ugly, pustulous face grinning, stabs the unconcious halfling, taking a sadistic revenge for his bleeding nose

Coup de grace: 2d4 - 1 ⇒ (3, 1) - 1 = 3

In loving goblin fashion, Poog rouses Reta from her snooze.

Along with Mogmurch, the trio engages in some friendly Licktoad …. banter(?)

Fort coup de grace: 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (1) + 5 = 6

Chuffy slits the helpless Wellma's throat and the gobs leave her for (very) dead.

☠

Squealy Nord accompanies the Goblins back to the Licktoad Village. Clearly he has netted a place among the tribe!

Surviving the raid is considered a good omen that you are true Licktoads, earning you young additions to the tribe a solid reputation and guaranteeing your importance for years to come. The goblin raid after-party includes the delightful sugar rush from too much wedding cake, corn whiskey & perfume.

In due course, a mob arrives at Paddlefoot Farm from Sandpoint, but only after the Licktoads have already trashed the place.

Clearly Chuffy, Mogmurch, Poog and Poo Poo Caca Reta are on their way to becoming notorious goblin legends in their own right!

And with that, we have finished the formal part of the game! ‘Gratz!

I will leave game play open for any roleplay you might like to do while Chronicles and Boonage are being sorted out in Discussion.

Too many Poo Poo Cacas here he says as he goes to play with piggy.