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Johnny was a druid,
Who could reincarnate,
He said: ‘I am immortal!’
His friends: ‘you’re tempting fate...’
The very next adventure,
Into a dragon’s lair,
Johnny was dismembered,
And rose as a bugbear.
Johnny now was furry,
And strong and fast and tough,
But worried townsfolk killed him,
(A monster’s life is rough...)
Johnny was a dwarf now,
Possessed of a fine beard...
... which got caught in an axle,
And off his head was sheared.
Jonny was an elf next,
He thought: ‘not a bad role’,
But with poor constitution,
Soon Johnny was a gnoll...
Now cautious of the townsfolk,
He snuck back to his home,
You can guess the next line...
... yep: he became a gnome.
Despite his gnomish body,
He knew no gnomish tricks,
Johnny versus giant,
Proved quite the fatal mix.
Returning as a goblin,
Johnny did soon despair,
The chance the townsfolk killed him?
Say... middling to fair?
Now a half-blood elf,
Johnny really did try,
But as we’ve seen so often,
His fate was just to die.
A half-orc’s nice strong body,
Johnny thought not so bad,
But still he died one more time,
Our poor druidic lad.
Back then as a halfling,
His friends’ comments were snide,
Rings, shire, Sam and ‘Precious’,
Drove him to suicide.
Rising as a kobold,
Johnny was not too pleased,
But anyway he perished,
When a green dragon sneezed.
Lizardfolkish Johnny,
At least could hold his breath,
But even this new talent,
Couldn’t prevent his death.
Johnny as an orc,
Never did lose a fight,
But still the townsfolk killed him:
T’was ever Johnny’s plight.
Troglodyte mode Johnny,
Was tough as hobnailed boots,
But with that one big drawback:
A stench like bottom toots...
Now a social outcast,
(He smelled like rotten fish),
He finally exclaimed the words,
‘I’ll pay for the damned wish!’
Johnny now is human,
His starting form and race,
For reincarnated Johnny,
Quite a nice change of pace!