For when the other threads get to intense...
I'll go first.
An elf, a human, and a dwarf walk into a tavern and order ale. When the barmaid brings them their drinks, each one has a large bug floating in it. The elf calls the barmaid back and asks for a new drink. The human removes the bug and drinks the ale. The dwarf picks up the bug out of his drinks and starts yelling "Spit it out! Spit it out!"
How do you know a singing bard is at your front door?
He can't find the right key and doesn't know when to come in!
spoiler'd for naughty themes:
What sign did the dryad have over her bed?
What sign did the dryad have over her bed?
Vini, Vini, Vini!