|
So, I’m 10 weeks away from being a daddy.
My first child, a daughter, is scheduled to arrive on 25 September, 2008.
I am very excited to be a father. Finding out my wife was pregnant was the best news I’d ever heard. I’ve gone to (almost) all the Dr. appointments. We’re signed up for birthing classes. I’ve just been giddy about it.
I only have one question: Where did the last five months go?
Seriously.
February:
Doctor: You’re going to have a baby in September.
Ungoded: Awesome.
July:
Doctor: You’re going to have a baby in 10 weeks.
Ungoded: Awe – 10 weeks? Really? That soon?
Don’t get me wrong. I’m still as happy as ever about being a dad. But now I’m also starting to feel a little ... nervous.
I mean, ten weeks? That’s soon.
Am I ready to be a parent?
I’m ready in the “I want to be a dad” sense.
But, I still act like a kid myself, how the hell am I supposed to raise one?
|
I'm four months away and I have these feelings too, I want to be a dad but it makes me nervous at the same time.Am I ready to be a parent?
I’m ready in the “I want to be a dad” sense.
But, I still act like a kid myself, how the hell am I supposed to raise one?
I am still trying to get my wife pregnant... And I am nervous!
|
|
You think time is flying now! My newborn, Gwynneth, is 4 months old and I literally feel like she was just born last week. I catch myself looking at pictures (and my wife doesn't move from one room to the other without her camera) and one minute she was the size of my hand (a premie) and now she's smiling and laughing and sitting up by herself!
My first daughter, Arwen, is reading by herself! Reading, for God's sake! I ran across one of my Amazon.com reviews for a Baby Einstein book the other day--I had written it when she was six months old. I couldn't help myself, I just broke down in tears, the silent waterfall type that won't stop.
Time really, really does fly. It's so cliche, but my advice, one father to another, don't squander a single second.
You think time is flying now! My newborn, Gwynneth, is 4 months old and I literally feel like she was just born last week. I catch myself looking at pictures (and my wife doesn't move from one room to the other without her camera) and one minute she was the size of my hand (a premie) and now she's smiling and laughing and sitting up by herself!
My daughter, Arwen, is reading! Reading, for God's sake! I ran across one of my Amazon.com reviews for a Baby Einstein book the other day--I had written it when she was six months old. I couldn't help myself, I just broke down in tears, the silent waterfall type that won't stop.
Time really, really does fly. It's so cliche, but my advice, one father to another, don't squander a single second.
I have two (3 and 4 months)and I've learned that kids make for loooong days (sometimes even longer nights) and short years. You'll feel burnt out, and frazzled, and slightly loopy for months (years possibly), then suddenly the kid is running around, talking, and hopefully sleeping through the night.
The hard part is when you pick up a toy or book or blankey that used to be so important to them, that you invested so much time and energy taking care of or looking for, but that they've just grown past. You'll find yourself thinking "But what if I'M not ready to be too big for JoJo Blankey."
It is the most satisfying thing I have ever done, though.
|
|
My experience has been that it is so much harder to be a parent than you can imagine, but conversely and overwhelmingly, it is so much more rewarding than you can imagine. As I left for work this morning to have the 5 year old making sure I had my lunch and kissing and hugging me goodbye, it is hard to think of any of the hard stuff.
Dammit, now I am crying at work! You guys are jerks!
|
|
Once my daughter was born time began doubling. She's 11 this year and it only really feels like 5 years have passed. Untill you look at pictures. Keep pictures to remind you you're not kidnapped in a TARDIS.
-DM Jeff
That's the absolute worst part about a military deployment: when you finally return home, you feel like no time passed, like you stepped into the TARDIS, had a crazy shoot-em-up adventure, and then came back to the second after you left...
But you didn't, man. A whole f!@#ing year passed, and the baby that was crawling when you left is running across the tarmac when you get back.
Once my daughter was born time began doubling. She's 11 this year and it only really feels like 5 years have passed. Untill you look at pictures. Keep pictures to remind you you're not kidnapped in a TARDIS.
-DM Jeff
That's the absolute worst part about a military deployment: when you finally return home, you feel like no time passed, like you stepped into the TARDIS, had a crazy shoot-em-up adventure, and then came back to the second after you left...
But you didn't, man. A whole f~*%ing year passed, and the baby that was crawling when you left is running across the tarmac when you get back.
Damn, I think that defines bittersweet.
One thing i learned from my own experience : Whatever people will tell you, you'll never feel "ready to have kids".
But when they come, well, you get ready anyway.
And you manage your parenthood, more or less. You do your best.
You learn every day, as your kid is growing up every day.
And if you get any doubt, any confusion, just look at your wife/girlfriend.
Think about how SHE deals with all that.
Men have a lot to learn from women, as companions, even moreso as mothers...
/respect
But, I still act like a kid myself, how the hell am I supposed to raise one?
That's exactly how, actually. The instant you can't think like a kid, you turn into Red Foreman.
Oh, and good luck!
Maybe that's the good thing about a baby. Once they arrive they are all about NEED. There's no time to worry about being a good Dad for a while, you're too busy being a Dad. And by the time things have calmed down enough that you actually have a spare momement to lie in bed and start worrying your wife or partner or friend and parent can tell you to stop being silly, look at all the good you have done.
Just remember to communicate with your significant other. Tag teaming is very important. Make sure she gets rest at the start because she needs to get her strength back but she'll have all of these Mommy urges driving her forward.
I WAS going to write a reply.
But instead I'm going home to my kid :)
Time does fly!
|
If you haven't already look into the baby sign language stuff. I wish I knew about that when my son was born. I know of two people that do that and it is awesome watching your baby "tell" you that is is hungry, etc. The two I have seen also seem to be more "intelligent" than other babies. Of course that could just be from the very smart and artistic parents they have.
|
Am I ready to be a parent?The simple fact that you are asking this question tells me that you are.
Communicate, help, and get help when you can.
And never grow up. It's far too overrated.
Whatever I was gonna say, Moff already said it.
If you're aware enough to ask the question 'am I ready for this?' then you're doing ten times better than the parent-to-be who isn't taking it seriously.
|
|
If you haven't already look into the baby sign language stuff. I wish I knew about that when my son was born. I know of two people that do that and it is awesome watching your baby "tell" you that is is hungry, etc. The two I have seen also seem to be more "intelligent" than other babies. Of course that could just be from the very smart and artistic parents they have.
My wife did this using a series of DVDs called "Signing Time." My oldest daughter still remembers everything and still enjoys the videos.
You're right--it's absolutely amazing to watch your baby using sign language before they can talk; being able to tell you what they need and how they feel before they can walk--just absolutely amazing!
Here's a sample from YouTube.
The Rainbow Song is actually one of the first songs my oldest learned to sing, and she learned to commit all the signs, too! I just can't recommend this series highly enough.
Here's a link to the Signing Times website.
The only caveat--these DVDs are very expensive, but well worth it.
Congratulations Ungoded. I wouldn't know if the time flies, so I can't comment on that.
What're you gonna name her/him? Gotta start another thread soon! ;)