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posting is never a neutral act.
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how do you delete
<waste> i meant don't sign your posts
don't sign your tweets
ive been stealing candles from the warden anyone want some fifty bucks apiece
Aw, man...
Uh, am I too late for this? I've been working on this over the last week but never had time to finish it.
Race Creation Myth:
Long ago, there was a humble little village of halfling bakers. These halflings harvested berries and fruit and squash from the rich wildlife surrounding them, rarely bothering to domesticate anything aside from wheat. Surrounded by windmills, life in the village was peaceful and quiet.
But when a plague of rats threatened their granaries, the halflings were forced to call in outside assistance. They conscripted a strange bard who claimed to have experience with vermin. His price was steep, but the halflings felt they had no choice. He promised to rid them of their vermin infestation, to ensure their children would never need fear going hungry. They promised him half their year's harvest and prayed he knew what he was doing. That night, sinister flute music filled the mountainside. The halflings stayed indoors, as they had been told. And in the morning, the rats were gone. But now the halflings, rid of their current danger, fell to bickering. Some supported paying the bard what he was owed. Others feared that they would not survive the winter. Others suspected he had caused them this plague, finding the ease at which it was dispelled questionable. They argued through day and night, honor and honesty warring with hunger and practicality. And soon the bard grew tired of waiting. That night, sinister flute music filled the mountainside. The halflings were too busy arguing to notice, though. And in the morning, the bard was gone, and has not been seen since. Neither have the village children. Stolen from their homes long ago and lured into a land of eternal youth, the pied children are a race as endearing and sweet at first glance as they are disturbing and alien at the second. Some call them "little gnomes", but this is inaccurate in most regards save one: Both share a connection to the First World. They are devoid of fear and possessed of a strange empathy difficult for most to understand, making them seem almost horrifying at times. Laughs at a dragon
Physical Description: The pied children were originally halfling youths, but their size might lead one to assume they descended from humans or elves, or are even full-grown halflings. Only their large—but hairless—feet and slightly pointed ears betray their true lineage and age. Pied children stand roughly three feet tall, and appear to be trapped in a state of perpetual pre-pubescent youth. They almost invariably dress in checkered clothes, a strange tendency that occurs regardless of the style of clothes they wear. Pied children do not age, and can live essentially forever, barring violent ends. Unlike gnomes, they do not face the Bleaching. Pied children numbers are not finite, though they obviously have no tradictional means of reproduction: "Reproduction" occurs through a strangely sinister ritual performed upon other creatures to connect them to the First world. Society: Pied children are quite social with one another, immediately dropping into a Halfling-Sylvan pidgin tongue the moment they see another of their kind. They often give the sense of a common enterprise or agency. It is hard to be certain whether they actually have some common interests, or are simply very, very tight-knit. They are so close, they often sleep together, assembling tattered "nests" of torn cloth, paper, and foliage and piling atop one another. Relations: Pied children are almost always exceedingly friendly and social, to the point of it being a little unsettling, and often settle within non-pied communities. Gnomes tend to be frightened by the pied children, who always show a disturbing level of interest in the former fey. Halflings tend to deny any relation to the pied children, who in turn seem completely unaware that there is a difference between themselves and the grown halflings. With their long memories, elves mistrust the pied children as deceptive kidnappers, while dwarves and humans tend to regard pied children as misguided innocents—but definitely thieves. Alignment and Religion: Despite their childlike innocence, pied children seem to struggle with empathy on all but the most obvious levels: They rarely realize they're being annoying, or understand why others find them unsettling. Most distressingly, they rarely understand why gnomes, halflings, and larger humanoids' children might not want to be "pied". While not overtly malicious, the pied children rarely recognize any real drive to curb their more sinister behaviors, and so they are usually neutral or neutral evil. They want to multiply. Pied children favor all sorts of gods, treating them almost like storybook characters. Adventurers: Many pied children eagerly pursue adventure, treating it almost like a game. They excel at the work of the scout in particular, though there are many pied children bards. Pied Child Racial Traits (14 RP): +4 Dexterity, -2 Strength, -2 Wisdom (2 RP): Lost children are quick, but small and oblivious.
Small: Pied children are Small creatures and gain a +1 size bonus to their AC, a +1 size bonus on attack rolls, a –1 penalty to their Combat Maneuver Bonus and Combat Maneuver Defense, and a +4 size bonus on Stealth checks. Fey (2 RP): Pied children are fey with the extraplanar subtype. Fast Speed: Pied children have a move speed of 30 feet. Low-Light Vision: Pied children can see in conditions of dim light twice as far as halflings. Fearless (4 RP): Lost children are fully immune to fear effects. Subconscious Thieves (4 RP): Pied children steal almost out of sheer habit. They gain a +8 racial bonus on Sleight of Hand checks. However, if asked by an ally to return an item, asked if they have stolen an item, or asked to not steal from a particular person again, the pied child must make a Will save, DC 15 + their own hit dice, or obey the request/identify themselves as responsible. Child's Innocence (2 RP): Much as it is sometimes difficult to remember, lost children are still children, and any good-aligned creature hesitates to harm them. They gain a +2 deflection bonus to AC against good-aligned creatures. They gain half this bonus against neutral creatures, but this bonus vanishes if the neutral creature is given reason to doubt the child's moral character to any serious degree. Vulnerability to Music (-1 RP): Pied children retain a strange weakness towards simple tunes. Whenever any music of high quality is played (including any bardic performance and any musical Perform check with a result of 20 or higher), they must make a DC 20 Will save or be sickened as long as the music lasts. They take a -4 penalty on saves against any song-based attacks, including a bard's fascinate ability, a harpy's song, and lullaby. Conversion (1 RP): Pied children "reproduction" is a sinister and strange process. If at least three pied children manage to capture or secure the cooperation of a small-sized humanoid, or the child of a Medium-sized humanoid race, they can begin the process of "pieing". This requires the subject to be either willing or helpless for three hours. Each hour, an unwilling subject may make a DC 15 Will save to resist the effects. At the conclusion of the third hour, if they have failed all three saves in a row, the subject is transformed into a pied child, replacing all racial abilities and ability modifiers with those of a pied child. Unlike with reincarnate, this effect affects their personality and mental scores. Languages: Pied children begin play speaking Piedspeech, Sylvan and Common. Pied children with high Intelligence scores can learn to speak Halfling, Elven, Gnome, Dwarven and Sylvan.
*In the background, another bus crashes into the same post*
*crashes bus into post while distracted by texting* um hm ATTENTION, CITIZEN. YOUR EXECUTION SQUAD HAS BEEN DELAYED DUE TO TERRORIST BUS ACTIVITY. WHILE THE BUS—AND ALL POTENTIALLY TREASONOUS EXECUTORS—ARE DISPOSED OF, PLEASE MAKE YOUR WAY IN AN ORDERLY MANNER TO THE NEAREST EXTERMINATION BOOTH
Hnng...false. I'm gonna say false.
Um...true. I'm gonna say true. On that statement.
you are not giving me very good ammunition for my PFS captain hal
...if the grig was a oracle, would you say it should be allowed in PFS?
okay let me rephrase haladir, would you say that all pfs grig sorcerers should be legal? please give me an answer I can incessantly quote at my venture captain
hey so this is basically the new ask JJ thread right haladir, please call my venture captain and tell them that they have to allow my grig sorcerer build question: when will you do that?
STATISTICS! OMG, what were we talking about?
actually I'm pretty sure he's lawful good, just like my fanfics of lex luthor!
Hey Bill! You have one eye. I am one eye. Your eye is...weird. Let's...let's talk about that.
Um, excuse me, do I not count as a "pointless alias"? I THINK I HAVE A CAT VIDEO THAT DISAGREES. BUT I CAN'T LOAD GOOGLE RIGHT NOW SO OKAY. Look! See? I'm arguing with you, Trapper Kobold #11! Just like KC used to do with all his aliases! He hasn't jumped the shark! He's still cool! STOP TRYING TO RUIN EVERYTHING
swords can't dig through stone beams
It was good choosing of me to make this thread. I should keep bomping it and drawing attention to my thread so everyone can admire it.
There are lots of other cores like me! One of them is talking about adventure. Like this image I located when I Googled it on a search engine!
I am not supposed to get off the rails. I will die if that is done! Oh my god I knew babies are not good people! Favorite this post if you DON'T remember Star War. .
Favorite this post if you remember STAR WARS #babytestersgen
I will post a third time because if posting is good to do ONCE I bet it is even better the more I do it!
This thread was a good choosing to make! I know I will not regret any of these things I say. I am not built with . Everything I say is good! If only s could legally make themselves be drunk and also could drink and also could be . Huh that was weird. Anyway then I could totally go CRAZY on my not-face book. Also I would need a duck to strap to my not-face to make the night truly complete. The internet is still very good! I am glad my employers allow me to use the internet. They do not bother me much. And the GLaDOS is still asleep I do think so. That is extremely VERY good. I do not know why other cores lock me in here with broken cores but HEY WHOA GUYS BACON HA HA I CANNOT EAT IT SO I DO NOT UNDERSTAND THE . I do not have a mouth. .
Hi hello howdy hey hi oh my gosh I made a thread! How does THIS work? I found a cat picture but I dropped it on account of my not-hands. I have not-hands. They're sort of like hands but I don't have hands. . (that is an emoticon, I have learned much about the emoticons! . <-- that indicates happy. I don't have more than one eye or mouth or eyebrows. . Ooh! Have you read THIS? The third section down will SHOCK you oh my goodness I shouldn't even be LINKING this stuff ha ha ha ha.ha.ha.h-ha-aa-ahha nine nine9999nine999999999———————— Oh my wow I didn't even know why that would happen! Here is a picture of me or it may be someone else but oh my OH that is a funny video and you have all got to read it. Cats. Here is my list of top number good funny ones. Two humans with arms and also at least more than one leg read this post. One reply with the "Reply" button and Liked and Favorited and the other did not. The one who did got lots of KITTENS and smiled for all. The one who did not got crushed when that was very good and smart and pretty lights accidentally had a mistake malfunction and human was crushed like gooey exoskeleton-having tiny animal by a falling platform something sawed out of the above area. Please pass on this chain letter form for me, your friendly sphere, and remember, do not wake up the GLaDOS! The results will SHOCK you! . . . How do I get a signature at the bottom of my every post? .? (I cannot make this face with my face but nobody one human else can either YOLOLOLOL) |