Swaggy Sockslayer McFly III's page

Hey everyone, wanted to drop a note here, apologizing for my silence. Life has been very hectic for me as well, my son had to be operated on again, I started working again, and lots of things had to be done in the background. I haven't had that much time to write across all my PBP's. That has gotten slightly better but not as much as I'd hoped.

While I do have some time again, thinking on it some more, I wouldn't be opposed anymore to making the end of book 1 here the natural stop for this campaign. I've never played the original ROTRL, and like Swaggy I have zero clue as to what's going on and why. That's probably the direct result of us killing all the enemy longshanks instantly, and totally fits goblins :) But as a player, not knowing bothers me a bit, and next to the large amount of reading and time in recheking and executing the sphere system I wouldn't mind sitting this one out after book 1.

Either way, I'm still very thankful for the excellent GMing and giving me a chance to play this, dictator GM :) I've often felt dwarfed by your superior writing/rapping skills!

Swaggy cheers when the demon lady goes down, as do most of his surviving group members! "All right! Lick toad victory, and party deep into night! Take Demon Shanks amnd give to Haikushanks? Threat to Sandy points over, now we take over as chiefs and give tribe a makeover!"

HIs troop sets out to start gathering whatever seemed even remote valuable, as he prepared for the journey back. They had to take the babies with them, too, and whichever Demon Arms they might have missed.

He still had no idea what was going on with these weird Longshankses, but that was fine. He didn't have to understand. All that mattered was that they'd won, and that Chamba and Batry were safe.

With all of his goblins, somehow, avoiding the blade, Swaggy sighs a sigh of relief. But then he feels the urge to puke again!

Troop actions: attack for 2d6+2, remove 5 damage from delayed damage pool through Swaggy's healing song (2) and defiant boar stance (3)

willsave Swaggy: 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (11) + 5 = 16
willsave Troop: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (10) + 2 = 12
Troop damage vs Longshank: 2d6 + 2 ⇒ (6, 1) + 2 = 9

Swaggy loses his 2 temp hp and regains them at the start of his turn. Troop drops to 14/26 hp.

Taking a breather, he begins a second song of healing - at the same time! Because he was just that slick!

Start Serenade of healing bard song as a standard and heals either the troop or Batry/Chamba for now, prioritising the PC's that fail their save. Round #4 out of 9 of bard songs this day.

healing: 1d8 + 3 ⇒ (7) + 3 = 10

A 29 will definitely hit, don't worry :P

Some of Swaggy's troop members raise their shield to block demonshank's massive swing, but the resounding clang shakes many to their core. Only through supreme (by goblin standards) discipline and Swaggy's encouragement do they remain standing!

"No pain, no gain!"

Brilliant inspiration, if he did say so himself!

Swaggy's heal, Mass, Adrenaline rush + mass variant > heals troop for half, troop can probably make an extra attack from using adrenaline rush on two targets?, 4 spell points: 1d8 + 3 ⇒ (2) + 3 = 5

Active defense, resist 2 damage. All 8 damage is in the delayed damage pool. At the start of their turn, they gain 2 temporary hit points from Swaggy's calm song (6 damage remains). Then they attack and auto hit from being a troop, gaining 3 temporary hit points (3 damage remains). Then they heal for... 2. Great. Troop is still at 16/26 hp.

Then, the troop smacks demonshanks twice!

Troop attack: 2d6 + 2 ⇒ (5, 4) + 2 = 11
Troop attack: 2d6 + 2 ⇒ (2, 3) + 2 = 7

Swaggy attempts to correct Chamba's first aim!

Warleader Sphere, Rally (aid another): 1d20 + 6 ⇒ (2) + 6 = 8

... And fails!

Swaggy and the troop expend their martial focus to automatically save VS the panic attack.

Vs Channel, Swaggy: 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (3) + 5 = 8
VS channel, Troop: 1d20 + 1 ⇒ (3) + 1 = 4

I forgot to ask, does the troop gain automatic bonus progression star increases as it levels, the way we do? If yes, it has resistance +1 at level 3 which would add +1 to all saves.

Unfortunately, Swaggy wasn't quite as strong when it came to shrugging off necrotic energy, nor were his gobbo's, and they throw up all over the room, clenching their limbs and stomachs in agony! Some of his more disciplined troops tried to raise their shields for some cover but whether it would help remained to be seen...

They try interposing shield/active defense, which adds +2 AC and DR2 against an attack, but I don't think that works vs channeled magic.

However, their pain does fuel their frenzy, and they attack!

troop attack: 2d6 + 2 ⇒ (1, 1) + 2 = 4

And they hit, though they were too busy vomiting to do any real damage - well, she might have gotten puked on, still!

From defiant boar stance, they gain 3 temporary hit points after damaging her, which removes 3 damage from their delayed damage pool, leaving them with 10 damage.

Then, Swaggy decides to switch songs to the Calm one, soothing everyone's wounds away before he continued dissing the Armshanks!

Everyone gets 2 temporary hit points and +1 to Fort saves instead of +1d4 fire damage. This should remove 2 more damage from the Troop's delayed damage pool, lowering remaining damage to 8.

Afterwards, he focuses his song towards himself and Chamba and heals their wounds!

Cure Sphere activation, Mass, Adrenaline surge on Chamba. 3 points. Chamba can, among others, make an attack as a reaction or move her speed as a reaction, while provoking. She is also still hasted, so could attack up to three times this round?

Healing: 1d8 + 3 ⇒ (7) + 3 = 10

All of Swaggy's and Chamba's wounds from the necrotic blast close! Hurray!

"Pretty Chamba! Batry! Simple plan - go get them!"

Troop HP: 16/24. Swaggy HP: 24+2/24.

Intimidate vs Arm Shanks, free action on rolling initiative: 1d20 + 9 ⇒ (9) + 9 = 18

Swaggy barely dodges the demonshanks' attack!

Though he would never admit that! He'd claim he simply sidestepped in the most dramatic possible fashion while Demonshanks tore the floor a new one.

He was just too fast, too fly!

Like Chamba! Such pretty gore enthousiasts were hard to come by, and she was about to become an even faster fire master!

Swaggy casts improved haste on Chamba and spends another point to make it last 3 rounds without concentration. He adjusts his mike as if planting the War Totem on the left out non-existant demon foot, as his spotlight puts everyone's weapons on fire! And then his troops all charge in and start poking her with their flamy pointy objects!!

Buffs: +1d4 fire damage, +2 morale bonus on weapon damage, Full Haste effect on Chamba, Troop challenges Demon Lady: -2 attack to everyone else, +2 to attack them.

Troop attack!: 2d6 + 1d4 + 2 ⇒ (3, 5) + (3) + 2 = 13

Sorry for not mentioning this here sooner, but i'm going through a rough period at home which is majorly cutting into my writing time. My stepmother is dying from cancer and my wife is not taking it well. Have to care for the younglings on my own atm. I'll still try and get a post out tonight. Recruiting a third or fourth might help move things along a bit.

Sure, I am. Will we recruit a replacement?

Apologies, the last verse might have been a tad too distasteful. I try not to include too many swear words in the lyrics but figured that he went a bit overboard with these rolls. :)

Swaggy wastes no time in this inevitable confrontation - he'd choose to go first and swiftly sate his lyrical thirst!

He points his cane and fire comes out to signal the start of this bout!

Destructive blast, enhanced, vs touch, vs FF?: 1d20 + 7 ⇒ (20) + 7 = 27
damage, if hit reflex dc 14 or take 1d6 fire at the start of each round until save is made: 3d6 ⇒ (5, 4, 5) = 14
critical confirm?: 1d20 + 7 ⇒ (20) + 7 = 27
crit damage?: 3d6 ⇒ (4, 4, 2) = 10

Dat Double nat 20 though! XD Unsure if he can activate a swift in a potential surprise round but that would set everyone's weapons on fire for 2d4 extra fire damage on the crit.

Sure enough, he feels his words weightened with truth, and the spotlight rise on him from the heavens above! All previous goblin Rappers were listening in - time for the best of the best dissing!

"Demon arm Lady, no time to prattle!"
"Time for A SLICK LICK TRICK RAP BATTLE!"
"Swaggy's coming at you like a punch in the gut!"
"Your boyfriend's dead - how you like that, you slut!?"
"Dont worry though, you're also gonna die! Not dead yet? Eh, just started my Rhyme!"

Twelve seconds later...

"Good fight, Longshank! Got lots of loot and you to thank!" He nods to the sizzling and spasming body/corpse of the armorshanks who was mysteriously missing much of his neck and a good part of his skull. "Okay! Three longshanks down counting Jumpy shanks back in town? Only one left. Time for more Life Theft!"

He bravely leads his troop down, assuming nothing of note remains on the floor except Bruthazmus and his harem of obese goblins.

Hey everyone, starting tomorrow I will be going on a 1 week vacation. I should be back on the evening of the 13th (of august). I'll have some internet access but will probably not be able to post daily. Please bot me if required. Best of fun/luck to everyone and hope to see you when I get back!

Grinning, Swaggy is about to reach into the bag with remains of jumpyshanks to use as 'popped corn' or whatever weird term Longshanks' had for it.

But eh, maybe he should help Chamba kill this evil Longshank first, and thus he reaches for his swordcane microphone...

Upon seeing the well-armored armorshank in his bedroom, Swaggy automatically glances to Chamba to see if the surprise attack was already underway.

"Looks like he's not getting out soon either way, with four girls under his sway," Swaggy responds, shrugging. "Big brain play though, Batry. You always know how to liven the party! Now... down the stairs we go and hit Longshanks with fiery flow!"

I think? Unless there are other doors remaining on this floor that we find anything in.

"You got it, big hero!"

Unless stopped, Swaggy closes the door and suggests the goblin invasion squad should try elsewhere. After all, Bruthazmus was a protector of goblinkind, right? No reason to kill him. Well, Shalelu would want him dead, probably, but that was the kind of Longshank on goblin violence he was secretly hoping to stop!

Swaggy's eyes grow large in awe! "Ooooh! Great hero Bruthazmus! Honor to meet you after what we've been through. Hey, wanna join us? We're taking over for Licktoads! But don't have to - you can stay with broads."

He waits a few moments to see if this mighty hero acknowledges him or does anything agressive, if not, he'd happily leave these female gobbo's to their special fin time with him. If it distracted him while they gave spanks to the longshanks, it was win-win!

"Awwwww! They're just the cutest poop slingers! And we can always use more backup singers!" Swaggy smiles broadly, already envisioning how these guys would be the next batch of noble goblin rappers!

"So... give them food and leave them here until we reappear? Time to play deadly pranks on longshanks. Play 'hide the flaming pole' up their (*censored*)! Shows them not to mess with licktoad overlords of Sandy Points!"

Sorry, for some reason I didn't receive a noticification that this one was updated... hm...

Swaggy regards the statue of Lamashtu and feels uneasy. He knew his 'mother' didn't favor him. He wasn't nearly monstrous enough. Had been picked on by gobs all his life until he became a rapper - and that hadn't been given to him by the mother either. As far as he was concerned, she could burn. However, he was barely smart enough to know saying that out loud would probably get him killed.

"Yes... should redecorate. Don't like that statue - more like hate. And what's up with those blades? Hey, fellow gobs, heed my words. Grab dem swords and add to our hoards," he commands, pointing at the glowing weapons. Surely they were powerful and/or valuable, and finders keepers!

willsave!: 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (20) + 5 = 25

Actually, wait, why am I rolling? I could take the natural 13 from my martial focus, I believe. Oh well. Living on the edge!

"Why would they keep jumpyshanks' tiny bits in bag? Why that important to human hag?" Swaggy wonders aloud, having zero clue what this meant. "Oh well. Collect to throw in soup later, can eat despite the smell. Make tasty soup for this group!" Swaggy cheers, then joins in the room searching with his troop.

perception: 1d20 + 6 ⇒ (14) + 6 = 20

Swaggy cheers at Chamba! "Chamba wins! Flawless victory!" He feels compelled to say, even though it doesn't rhyme. Weird.

"Hm. Wonder what evil ladyshanks was doing here? Didn't expect us to appear. And lots of odd things in sack. Might make for tasty snack?" He then wonders as his gobs begin searching the room.

Then he racks his not too impressive brain for why a longshanks would carry this weird stuff with her. Was she like a self-cannibal, or was it something more nefarious!

Knowledge arcana: 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (11) + 5 = 16

Knowledge arcana: 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (4) + 5 = 9

Swaggy shrugged. Oh well! Surely this one longshank wasn't important in the grand sheme of things!

"Oh get ready for these lyrics to tear!
...Nothing? You ain't got clothes to wear!
Longshank go and hear my desire!
Today, Imma burn you with LOTS of fire!"

intimidate on combat start: 1d20 + 9 ⇒ (16) + 9 = 25

swift, aid another self via war sphere: 1d20 + 6 ⇒ (1) + 6 = 7
Destrutive blast, vs touch, vs FF, -4 melee: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (6) + 2 = 8

Unfortunately, his fire doesn't land. Maybe he just doesn't wanna risk hitting Chamba. He's a softy, like that!

Im fine with immediate hoatilities to keep things moving :)

"Chamba, shouldn't we tal-" Swaggy tries, but probably too late. A pretty longshank like that with such a nice cat couldn't possibly be behind all this! No. That probably work of smelly, ugly longshanks! That's how goblin children tales went, after all, and surely their wisdom could be relied upon in moments of great importance.

...Right?

Swaggy keeps singing until both Chamba's and his wounds bugger off!

heal: 1d8 + 3 ⇒ (5) + 3 = 8
heal: 1d8 + 3 ⇒ (8) + 3 = 11

Which would be now! Seemed like the goblin rappers of old and the Mother both favored Chamba and himself. But why wouldn't they!? They were both awesome!

Bardic rounds used: 3.

"Sweet, sweet gold and loot! Throw big party later, woot! But first, time to give dank longshanks the shank as thanks!"

His troops merrily carries the gold and stuff out. "Oh, take Ripnugget head. So gobs know he be dead."

...And what's left of Ripnugget's head is also sliced off and taken as a trophy. Onward, for the Licktoads!!!

I feel an urge to desribe a Mortal Kombat fatility of some kind, except Swaggy is a support character and the least qualified to actually make the kill :') Anyone feel like claiming the glory!?

Throughout the chaos of flying limbs, flaming weapons, bouncing weapons and enemy chiefs on mounts, Swaggy almost didn't notice Chamba was grievously wounded!

Almost.

He gestures to his backup singers and they begin a somber tune!

"Pretty Chamba, please don't die!"
"That would make, Swaggy cry."
"Please show me, your nice smile."
"Go and kill, something vile!"

Serenade of healing: 1d8 + 3 ⇒ (5) + 3 = 8
Activates Serenade of healing as a bardic masterpiece and heals Chamba for 1d8+3 (Currently heals Chamba for 8)

Meanwhile, his troop continues smacking, whether or not the last gob other than Ripnugget was alive enough to be worth the attack remained to be seen, but if so, he would get it!

Troop attack damage: 2d6 + 1d4 + 2 ⇒ (1, 1) + (3) + 2 = 7

Oh. Oops. I somehow thought the enemies had yet to go after Batry XD

Batry, you up for smacking some hobs with haste and sweet buffs? :)

Now safely behind his troop Somewhere in the corridor I guess, which is probably quite cramped :') , Swaggy decides to take off the velvet gloves!

"Demon arm be dead tonight, here have a taste of Licktoad might!"
"To us, it's gonna be an absolute blast. But to failure gobs we'z just too fast!"

Swaggy uses three spellpoints to cast Haste on Batry and Chamba from range and have it last for a monute without concentration!

Then he grabs hold of his Swordcane Really tightly as he concentrates on the lyrics to keep it fresh and dirty!

Activates war sphere to grant allies within 30 feet +2 morale bonus to damage rolls. He will use aid another on the next low to mediumish attack roll from an ally as an immediate action.

aid another: 1d20 + 6 ⇒ (3) + 6 = 9

Fails. Total buffs: Haste effect, +1d4 fire on damage, +2 morale on damage.

Meanwhile, his troop was barely missed twice and keeps chomping on the gob that hit Swaggy!

troop attack damage: 2d6 + 1d4 + 2 ⇒ (1, 6) + (3) + 2 = 12

Swaggy looks to the dogslicer through his chest and sighs. What was with people bringing blades to a word fight!?

He steps back and clears his throat (from the blood).

"*Ahem*! Okay, dem cut not bad. But now you've went and gone made Swaggy mad and he's gonna take all lil' gobbo's to bed! Forever! Yes, ya'll gonna be dead and when we poop on your graves no one's gonna be sad! You messed with the wrong master, now watch as this fights will be your disaster! Eh, Swaggy may be slick but his friend? Dey be quick!"

intimidate vs Ripnugget, start of fight free action: 1d20 + 9 ⇒ (2) + 9 = 11

Move + standard: Withdraw from the frontline without provoking. Swift: all weapons from allies are on fire and deal +1d4 fire damage.

Seeing a gobbo interfere with the rap battle, his flunkies close in and give the dogslicer da business while some of his other ones throw rotten tomatoes at Ripnugget for his horrible lyrics.

troop attack damage vs attacking gobbo: 2d6 + 1d4 ⇒ (2, 5) + (1) = 8
They also mark Ripnugget as with their challenge. He has -2 to attack everyone else but +2 to attack the goblin troop.

I don't immediately see a map link and it doesn't seem to be on roll 20. How did I access it again? :') I'll have Swaggy withdraw since I don't want to risk casting spells yet and failing the concentration roll, assuming spheres of power uses those rules.

I'll post later tonight, need to read back up on all Swaggy's combat abilities.

Bursting in along with his numerous homicidal backup singer, Swaggy undauntingly points his shiny swordcane to the bad chief! Well... badder chief?

"Ripnugget! Sandy Point belong to Licktoads, yáll, so stand tall! The sentence is death, and rather than prattle, it's time for another RAP BATTLE!"

Does anyone stop Swaggy or do we immediately roll initiative? Swaggy doesn't particularly care about useful info he can give us so long as his lyrics assert their dominance over his :)

"Right! Leave horse roast for victory toast! Time for a good boss-fight where we shom them Licktoad might. For the tribe and the mother!" he cheers, then starts marching towards where he thinks the throne room is.

"Though I wish she'd bother watching over us once..." he murmers to himself.

"Licktoads! Prepare to toss loads! ...Just don't hit 'Wamba, okay?" Swaggy commands, and his entire troop readies their stolen javel- spear thingimagiggies they stole, um, 'took' from the longshanks above not too long ago!

They'd had a bit of practice now, and so did Swaggy himself! A verse about how things couldn't possible get worse for this horse than feeling the band's flaming spears land does indeed set them all ablaze!

Hmmm. Flaming spear? It had a nice ring to it! He should probably go and make that his trademark magic before some crossdressing longshank stole this totally cool and orginial goblin magic!

Doing what I can. Have a family outing today and will do a proper IC post in the evening.

I kinda like the idea of recruiting one more person to help fill in gaps and help pushing a bit, also like the idea of a slightly larger party with more characters to interact with. But I also realize that the party is very 'powerful' as is and that doing so might lead to some balance issues.

Same! Horsies are really scary and should be dealt with, and this other Goblin boss sounds like a potential problem later, so time to engage in a rap battle!

Sorry, I've been struggling a bit to keep up with posting in general due to some real life issues. In this case, I'm waiting for batry/Curan to decide how he'd like to handle the goblins if we want to recruit them later. Though, I'm with him in a different campaign and he sorta vanished there in the last two weeks... hope he's still around.

Swaggy's eyes go as wide as his brain - Probably!

"Oh, Oh, Friend Batry with the big brain play! Scare them really good to get them under sway, or do we bolt the door and go away? Can come back later with heads of leaders and will be easier, nay?"

If we're going through with the plan of taking over the licktoad tribe, it might help us if we bring more recruits along after Demon Arm disbands? But I don't think Swaggy is smart enough to consider this over the immediate glory of taking out the enemy with some sick burns and glorious goblin bravado :)

"Yo, yo hear the beat!"
"Time to run or face defeat!"

intimidate, noble scion: 1d20 + 9 ⇒ (9) + 9 = 18

"Cuz there ain't no party like a Licktoad party!"
"No invites cause Demon Arm aint hardy!"

Inspire courage +1 and flame aura spotlight as swift, everyone has +1 att/damage as competence and +1d4 fire damage done.

And sure enough, Swaggy's patrol wastes no time to prove it!

Challenge 1 target as move, troop attack that target. Challenges target has -2 to attack others but +2 to attack the troop.

Troop damage: 2d6 + 1d4 + 1 ⇒ (2, 6) + (2) + 1 = 11

Wanted to give a notice, I've been weighed down in family matters the last two weeks (major health-related problems of wife and mother in law) and my writing time has been cut down a lot. For that reason, I haven't been able to keep up with daily posting across all my campaigns. Swaggy is a bit of a special case as well since he only talks in Rhyme and is mechanically outside the normal pathfinder system. As such, he costs a lot more energy and time to write and his presence has suffered more than some others lately.

That said, I definitely want to to continue and I will post when I can. But my posting rate will be lower until some matters get resolved in real life here. Sorry and thanks for your patience, everyone.

Charge!! Goblin Subtlety Ho!

"Maybe if they're playing, they're betting gold? let's go shank Demon Arm and see what they hold!" Swaggy fistbumps the air, pleased at his own holding in cardgames joke.

Go for it!

Taking his cue, Swaggy crawls out the hole, swordcane first, followed by an increasingly long line of flunkies. "Good job, Chamba! You's always my favorite gob. Well, girl-gob!"

It looks like he'd give her a hug, but je nervously hesitates and is then distracted by the room's interior. "Creepy..." he mutters. "Um, go grab dagger then and we'll take some peeksies behind doors?"

Meanwhile, his troop enters battle formation.

"Hmm... maybe Chamba is right. Maybe Licktoad pride demands we fight!" Swaggy explaims, and his troops cheers with him! "Though, bridge's strength looks very bad. Might break if we go too quick ahead. Maybe pretrty Chamba can sneak us in Batry's weird space and from behind we smash in their face!?"

"Hm... think we can disguise or bluff ourselves as demon arm wannabees? Seems a lot easier than fighting our way in, sheesh!"