Wow. I thought this was a really unique and interesting use of the monster, location, and theme. If my group played this, I know we would have a great time and I would scare, but probably not kill them.
I think the combination of sinking ship and paralyzation creates peril in the forefront of the player's minds in a way that even challenging combat does not.
I was surprised the judges were unhappy with this entry as it seems to have so much going for it. The criticism was about technicalities of whether its urban enough, whether the map was complex enough. Obviously these elements matter, but to me the great story being presented here trumps those relatively minor issues.
Congratulations, you've got a good entry, and my vote.
